In which we seeSingapore-basedside Lions XII profit from a momentary bout of dumbfounded confusionthatspread through the defence of their Malaysian Cup opponents, Pahang FA, when an over-hitpass cannoned back off the feet of the linesman stationed on the touchline without actually ever going out of play.
We've no Earthly idea why, but it seems that the unveiling of a new team bus is big news round Bayern Munich's gaff, with the Bundesliga giants staging a frankly ludicrously glitzy event outside the Allianz Arena to unveil their swanky new wheels.
So exquisitely awkward it's almost painful, here's the super special moment that Real Madrid teammates (and BFFs) Iker Casillas and Alvaro Arbeloa shared in the Bernabeu tunnel before last night's Super Cup first leg...
(WARNING: Pies accepts no responsibility for viewers cringing themselves to death)
Asked by the chaps at Full-Time Devils to sum up Nani's piss-weak performance against Swansea on Saturday, this little United fan outside Old Trafford gave the Portuguese mimsy both barrels with a typically brusk Northern quip...
For anyone out there who doesn't speak thick Manc, the pithy little bugger says:
In which sausage-fingered refereeJonathan Moss struggles to work his newfangled vanishing spray while marking outan Arsenal free-kick, only to accidentally unload his canister of fluff all over poor wee Santi Cazorla who, unfortunately, was stood down-wind at the time.
We're not entirely sure what the Premier League's stance is on Vines of birds potentially crapping in peoples mouths is (there are plenty of niche pay sites for that kind of thing...or so we've heard, anyway), but we feel that it's simply our journalistic duty to show this one to you.
Ashley Young had an unsaviour moment at Old Trafford today as a bird shite in his mouth in the first half which was exactly what came of the Manchester United performance as Colin Monk out-witted his more illustrious opponent which gave Swansea a deserved 2-1 win in the season curtain raiser!
Besiktas 0-0 Arsenal Champions League Qualifier 1st Leg 19th August 2014
Arsenal came away from Istanbul with a creditable draw on Tuesday night after a tough battle with Besiktas.
Both sides had chances to win the game, with Demba Ba incredibly hitting the bar with a shot from the kick-off before going close again later on and Olivier Giroud failing to capitalise on a handful of chances.
For anyone that has watched Chelsea's pre season, you would know that Cesc Fabregas has slotted into the team as if he has been here for years. Tonight at Burnley, Fabregas produced a moment of magic that astounded everyone!
Arsenal fans HAVE to be kicking themselves watching his display tonight.
Liverpool 2-1 Southampton Premier League -17th August 2014
Goals from Liverpool's new SAS Raheem Sterling and Daniel Sturridge gave the Reds a hard-fought win as the post-Suarez era begins.
Sterling opened the scoring on 23 minutes after a superb trhough-ball from Jordan Henderson but the Anfield floodgates failed to open, with Ronald Koeman's new-look Southampton giving as good as they got.
Arminia Bielefeld hammered fellow2. Bundesliga side SVSandhausen4-1 in the first round of the DFB Pokal (the German equivalent of the FA Cup) with striker Fabian Klos scoring the goal of the game to put Bielefeld 2-0 up on the hour mark.
With a deep corner swung out to the edge of the box, Klos was forced to backtrack several steps before connecting with an absolute monster of a volley.
With Serie A not farting back into life for another fortnight, Juventus continued their pre-season warm-up with a friendly against aSingapore XI last night, with Andrea Pirlo scoring the opener with a typically nonchalant free-kick flummoxing the goalkeeper by sliding his set-piece effortlessly underneath the wall.
We can't remember him scoring too many of these for West Brom or Birmingham City over the years, but Liam Ridgewell was the unlikely man to set out on a 50-yard rampage from the half-way line to score a superb drivingsolo goal for Portland Timbers against New England Revolution in the MLS yesterday.
After being nominated by former Manchester United mucker Darren Fletcher, Cristiano Ronaldo did the decent thing and took up the Ice Bucket Challenge (a viral charity dare where nominees tip a bucket offreezingwater over themselves then nominate their croniesto do likewise) but he did it in the most "Cristiano Ronaldo" way imaginable: by stripping down to his own-brand, designer purple grundies first.
Here is a video of about three and a half minutes of today's highlights and the commentary is almost as entertaining as the highlights. http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x23x3b2_newcastle-vs-manchester-city-0-2-highlights-premier-league-17-08-14_sport You can follow us on our three social media sites below:
Newcastle are losing 1-0 at the half and here's the video of the David Silva goal after 38 minutes although the video is not too good. Newcastle have played quite well with a lot of energy but we haven't been dangerous in the final third of the field so far. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OSYdhGnlsdM You can [.
Timmy Howard couldn't put on another stunning display like his World Cup efforts this summer. Leicester, for it's part, made the most of it's first time back in the Premiership in 10yrs as 4 minutes from the final whistle, as Wood latched onto a rebound and put it home. Final 2-2. Leicester City vs Everton 2-2 by Mylife1972 video: footytube
New line up, new highly touted manager in van Gaal, and a new result. Swansea scored early Sung-Yeung found the back of the net. It wasn't until the 2nd half until Man U leveled, and what a level as Rooney pulls a bicycle kick goal from 4m out. Ex Spur Gylfi said it wasn't over though. Scoring in the 72', he put Swansea back on top, and there it held as the Red Devils looked flat, and executed
West Ham always plays Spurs tight and this match was no different. While many Hammer fans decried the weak attacking lineup for West Ham, Spurs gave them hope with an early harsh red in the box as Naughton was called for a handball in what should have been a no call as the shot was going over and it was a reactionary block.
And we're back for a new season! Crystal Palace struck first, and until the waning seconds of the first half, it looked like Arsenal was going to pull a Brazil and dominate possession but still lose. 76% possession for the Gunners, and it wasn't until Puncheon saw a 2nd yellow for CP that Arsenal managed to sneak away with what should have been a runaway win.
Appearing on the fondly-remembered 'Bad Influence' youth-centric video gamesshowat some point around about 1993, here's Leeds United superstarsTony Dorigo,Jon Newsome and Brian Deane (draped insuitablysumptuous club track-suits) giving mid-1990s children's television behemoth Andy Crane a helping hand during a segment on the new raft of football games to have hit the consolesat the time.
We've already seen a fine effort fromNantes midfielder Serge Gakpé this weekend, but Keisuke Hondawent above and beyond the call of duty in his attempt to claim the "worst corner kick ever" title with a truly audacious display of craptitude during Milan's pre-season friendly against Valencia last night.
Sunil Gulati became the latest member of the American soccer community to accept the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge, but his video easily wins the award for most random star power.
Yes, none other than Rod Stewart did the honors of dumping an ice bucket full of water and ice on Gulati's head. Also in the video are Sacramento Kings owner Vivek Ranadive, NBA legend Chris Mullin and NBA star Rudy Gay.
Toronto FC forwardBright Dike failed to trouble the score-sheet as his side went down 4-1 to Sporting KC in the MLS last night though, technically speaking, the Nigerian international (cousin of Fenerbache striker Emmanuel Emenike, no less) still managed to find the back of the net in a literal sense.
There were some emotional scenes at St. James' Park today, as John Alder and LIam Sweeney were honored with a minute's applause before the game started today and the two captains Fab Coloccini and Vincent Kompany in addition to Jimmy Montgomery representing Sunderland walked to the center circle with family members.