South America

Videos

Video: Argentinos Juniors supporters throws dentures onto the pitch

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You've seen the success that deploying the false nine has brought to its proponents. Now, football's latest tactical innovation is the false teeth. A fan of Argentinos Juniors expressed his unhappiness at the team's current run of form by throwing his dentures onto the pitch during the 3-1 defeat to Belgrano on Monday.

Bobble on pitch gets assist in dreadful Brazilian open goal miss

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This may well be one of the worst misses of all time, with Willian Ribeiro the guilty party. Ribeiro was playing for Campinense against Atletico-PB in the Paraibano League in Brazil, when he was sent through on goal. The striker knocked the ball past the goalkeeper, and was left with a free shot on goal [.

Deportivo Quito’s Alex Colon Thrashes One In Off The Bar From The Half-Way Line (Video)

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By Chris Wright

On Wednesdayeveningover in Ecuador's Primera A division, second-placeDeportivo Quito found themselves 4-0 up againstDeportivo Cuenca in the first 25 minutes, though they had to wait till the hour mark for midfielder Alex Colon to complete the scoring when he unleashed hell from the half-way line.

Video: Argentinian referee pushes manager

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It's all too common to see footballers and coaches laying their hands onto match officials, but your rarely see the refs fight back. That's exactly what referee Juan Pompei did as he struggled to keep a lid on a bad-tempered match between Newell's Old Boys and Arsenal. The video above gives you a taster of [.

Deportivo Quito Striker Turns And Volleys Home While Sitting On His Backside vs LDU Quito (Video)

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By Chris Wright

In which veteran Deportivo Quito strikerWalter "Mamita" Calderon turns his man and volleys home to put his side 2-0 up over rivals LDU Quito in the Ecuadorian Primera A league a feat made all the more impressive once you factor in that he was actually sitting on his arse for roughly half of themaneuvre.

Video: Arsenal flop Andre Santos puts a penalty into orbit

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Arsenal fans were pleased to see the back of Andre Santos when he joined Brazilian side Gremio on loan. But it doesn't look like his performances have improved since his return to his homeland. He missed the decisive penalty in a 5-4 shootout defeat to Juventude in the Campeonato Gaúcho semi-final. And boy, did he [.

Arsenal Legend Andre Santos Entrusted With Important Penalty, Skies It Into Stratosphere vs Juventude (Video)

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By Chris Wright

With their Campeonato Gaucho Cup semi-final against Juventude finishing1-0 after extra-time and with both sides scoring all of theprecedingnine penalties in the shootout, Gremio put their place in the final in the hands of a loanee:beloved Arsenal legend Andre Santos.

Ronaldo Scores With Rinky Dinky Flip-Flap Maneuvre During Maracana Exhibition Match (Video)

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By Chris Wright

The Maracana re-opened yesterday with a "Friendsof Bebeto vs Friends of Ronaldo" charity game laid on especially for the workers who have been toiling away on it over the past three years, in which the latter Brazilian striker rolled back the years (and the flab) to score with a rinky dinky elastico-type thing in an 8-5 win for his side.

The Goalmouth Scramble During Danubio vs Cerro Was Rather Spectacular…ly Crap (Video)

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By Chris Wright

Complete with Yakety Sax to complete the effect, here's the truly glorious goalmouth scramble (or "stramash" for our Scottish viewers) that graced the Uruguayan Premier League game between Danubio and Cerro last weekend...

(Thanks to Pies fan @JBBetting for the tip-off)

Video: Venezuela U17 player executes a spectacular ‘Redondo’

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While Zinedine Zidane's 'roulette' move and Ronaldinho's 'flip-flap' are increasingly prominent skills to grace the game, the 'Redondo' made famous by Fernando Rodondo in Real Madrid's dismantling of Manchester United in 2000 is a pretty rare animal indeed. Yet, here is a Redondo spotted in the wilds of the South American Under-17 Championships [.

VIdeo: Neymar is transformed into a comic book character

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As Brazil starts to ramp up towards next summer's World Cup, Neymar's stock will continue to rise. The perfect indication that the Samba Boys' star is very much the man of the moment is that he has been made into a comic book character. Cartoonist and comic book artist Mauricio de Sousa is behind the [.

Argentina U17′s Sebastian Driussi Scores Sensational Overhead Kick From Outside The Box vs Uruguay (Video)

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By Chris Wright

After just three minutes of last night's South American U17 Championship final stage tie, Argentina's Sebastian Driussi decided he'd had just about enough of not scoring sensational long-range overhead kicks and immediately set about redressingthe situation.

Brazilian ‘Spotkick Specialist’ Somehow Manages To Send His Penalty Backwards (Video)

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By Chris Wright

Worst. Penalty kick. Ever...

The guilty party is America-SP'sdesignatedpenalty taker, Pilo (againstVotuporanguense in the Paulista A3 league) if you were wondering.

Video: América-SP’s Pilo take the worst penalty of all time

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Yes, we all mocked Chris Waddle, Sergio Ramos et al, but at least they kicked the ball in the right direction. This woeful spot-kick comes from Brazil's Paulista A3 division. América-SP midfielder Pilo won the penalty and took it himself. A slip during his run-up led to Pilo scuffing the ball horribly, causing his attempt [.

Football Art: Ronaldinho Tricks And Skills Animated In Flipbook Form (Video)

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By Chris Wright

Someone or something by the name of Etoilec1 has taken the time (and let's face it, it must have taken bloody ages) to produce a fantastic flipbook-style animation of a compilation of Ronaldinho's finest flicks, tricks, skills and doohickies during his time at Barcelona and Milan, and the result is really rather charming.

CRAC Striker Skies Shot So Badly He Turns Away In Disgust, Still Somehow Manages To Score! (Video)

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By Chris Wright

We've all been there: buggering up a pass or a shot so badly that the only acceptable reaction is to turn away and grimace in pure disgust at your own ineptitude it's exactly what Phil Jones should've done after spluffing a woefully botched "header" in off Vinnie Kompany's back against Man City on Monday night, rather than celebrating like he'd just pinged in a 30-yarder off the underside of the crossbar.

Nacional Supporters Break World Record For Biggest Flag, Unfurl 600m Behemoth Before Copa Libertadores Game

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By Chris Wright

Now that's a flag

On Thursday, after nigh-on seven years of planning, fans of Uruguayan side Nacional finally realised their destiny and set a new world record for the biggest flag ever unfurled at a sporting event when they broke out an absolute monster during their Copa Libertadores tie against Mexican club Toluca.

Arsenal De Sarandi Players Scuffle With Riot Police As Copa Libertadores Game Ends In Shotgun-Wielding Skirmish

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By Chris Wright

Last night's Copa Libertadores group stage fixture between Brazil's Atletico Mineiro and Argentina's Arsenal de Sarando ended in time-honoured South American fashion: with shotguns being toted after the away side, a tad angry at having been soundly trounced, took their anger out on the match officials and the armed riot police sworn to protect them.

Funnies

Queretaro FC Relegated From Mexican First Division, Owner Simply Buys Another Top Tier Team And Moves Them To Queretaro

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By Chris Wright

What do you do if you're the head of a gigantic marine engineering company and a seafoodconglomerateand the Mexican first division football club you own happen to find themselves relegated into the obscurity of the second tier? Exactly, you pool your resources, buy a shiny new club 1,000 kilometres down the road and submit your application to move the damn thing across the country to replace your old, broken toy.

Shit Football Kits: Bolivia’s Brown-Nosing ‘Viva Uruguay’ World Cup Strip, 1930

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By Chris Wright

This is the kit that Bolivia's national team wore at the 1930 World Cup in Uruguay...

That's right. Bolivia turned up to the first ever World Cup in Uruguay in a specially made strip that paid homage to their hosts and dear South American neighbours with a lovely bespoke message spelled out across the teams' chests.

Shit Football Kits: Argentina’s Mind Bending Copa America Keeper Shirt, 1995

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By Chris Wright

Take these, you'll be needing them...

As modeled by Sergio Goycochea, this is the Timothy Leary-inspired goalkeeper jersey that Argentina took with them to the 1995 Copa America...

Startled,hallucinatingand beyond confused, the poor bugger obviously didn't know where he was after the game.

Brazilian Side Uniao Barbarense Field Two Players Wearing Same Shirt Number To Deliberately Confuse Opponents

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By Chris Wright

Brazilian side Uniao Barbarense have sprung a new one on us after admitting to deliberately sending out two players wearing the same shirt number on their backs in a bid to befuddle their opponents.

Having played the first half of their recent Campeonato PaulistaSerie A2fixture against Linense wearing his officially assigned No.

Brazil

Willian Ribeiro: A Tragic Victim Of Poor Landscaping

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This begins as the worst sitter-miss you've ever seen, then becomes the worst pitch you've ever seen, and then you take the VHS out of the VCR and wonder what time machine this video from 1987 just arrived from.

Actually it's this weekend and it's Willian Ribeiro of Campinense who became the victim of poor landscaping, groundskeeping, or some gnome beneath the pitch punching at the grass at opportune times.

Generation Next: Brazil’s Young Talents at 2013 South American Under-17 Championships

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Generation Next: Brazil's Young Talents at 2013 South American Under-17 Championships is a post from: Just Football

The 2013South American Under-17 Championships took place in April in Argentina. Brazil went through the tournament unbeaten, but a succession of draws in the final group stage saw them finish third behind Venezuela and eventual winners Argentina.

The Man Who Brought Us Lionel’s Cousin

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This clip was brought to attention because the scorer in question is 28 year old Maxi Biancucchi, cousin of one Lionel Messi. That instantly makes you famous. This goal, while very good, is fairly common enough that if he was not related to the greatest footballer on the planet, it would have fallen into a YouTube black hole, never to emerge.

The Rise of Atlético Mineiro – Copa Libertadores winners 2013?

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The Rise of Atlético Mineiro Copa Libertadores winners 2013? is a post from: Just Football

Atlético Mineiro have been the best team in the 2013 Copa Libertadores so far, winning tough games in Argentina against fellow Brazilian team São Paulo as well as in the altitude of La Paz.

NewsNow

Brazilian Police Cancel Order For 17,000 Raincoats After Realising World Cup Is Held During Dry Season

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By Chris Wright

"Is it me or is it dry in here?"

With their double-wide fat seats and prostitutes being given state-funded English lessons, it's fair to say that Brazil are doing a bang-up job getting their affairs in order for the 2014 World Cup that's, of course, if you choose to ignore the fact that none of the budget-blasting stadiums are actually ready yet.

Fluminense Kindly Request Fans Stop Dressing Up As The Taliban

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By Chris Wright

Reigning Brazilian champions Fluminense have issued an official request to their fans to knock an internet campaign on the head which has seen fans posing for photos dressed as "Taliban warriors" in order to "show their warrior spirit".

Flu fans were so disconsolate after losing in the Copa Libertadores toEcuadorian outfit Emelec to a late penalty a couple of days ago that they started the campaign to bolster team spirit and also asked the players to get involved too.

Struggling Brazilian Side Santo Angelo Raffle Off Live Sheep At Half-Time To Keep Fans Interested

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By Chris Wright

The half-time entertainment at Santo Angelo leaves a lot to be desired

Gawd bless the Brazilian lower leagues, for they truly are a goldmine of seemingly random footballmiscellania. Like many non-league sides around the world, Brazilianamateur side Santo Angelo are struggling to balance the books at the moment, with attendances dwindling to quite literally nothing as fans find other ways to occupy themselves of a weekend.

Competition: WIN! New Uruguay 2013 Confederations Cup Shirt Courtesy Of Puma

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By Chris Wright

"Heh heh! Look at this country: U-R-GAY!"

Don't say we never treat you for it's competition time again here on Pies!

Hot on the heels of Italy's new Confederations Cup clobber, PUMA have today unveiled the kit that Uruguay will be wearing at the tournament in Brazil this summer, with the design paying homage to the strip that La Celeste wore when they took home the gold medals at the 1924 Olympic Games in Paris hence the rather eye-catching lace-up neck.

Clarence Seedorf Faces Hefty Six Match Ban For Heinous Crime Of ‘Leaving The Pitch The Wrong Way’

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By Chris Wright

Remember when Clarence Seedorf was administered with the second red card of his 800+ game career against Madureiralast weekend when he refused to leave the pitch in the "correct" direction? Well, the Dutch veteran could now be facing a whopping six-match suspension for his crimes.

The Rest

Wife of Chelsea midfielder Ramires vents anger after Brazil exclusion

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One may have thought that the off-season was a difficult time for the footballer's WAG. With little interest in football, you have to put up with your significant other cluttering up the house, playing FIFA with his mates and counting his money in a vastly expensive onesie. That certainly seems to be the opinion of [.

Diego Maradona returns to Argentina in typical violent, crazy fashion

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You can normally tell when Diego Maradona has landed in Argentina. It starts with a swarm of journalists around the former footballer, and ends with El Diego kicking off and kicking out at anyone that bothers him. After a flight from Dubai to Argentina (which also created reports of violent behaviour), Maradona walked into an [.

Germany Rises to Heavy Favorite for World Cup 2014

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'Super' Mario Gomez of Bayern Munich/German Nat'l Team
After the Champions League semifinals, Germany has become the obvious choice to win the 2014 World Cup in Brazil.

Typically, in world Soccer circles, the European countries get more adulation and favoritism among critics than the South American countries.

Vanderlei Luxemburgo Sparks A Riot

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You know, this type of thing happens way too often. A Copa Libertadores match between Huachipato of Chile and Gremio ended in a draw violence when those from Huachipato began attacking Gremio coach Vanderlei Luxemburgo for suggesting the Chileans enjoy a vacation (presumably he was less polite). Vanderlei, owner of the world's most extensive coaching resume, attempts to flea, but fails and offers us a very important lesson: if nonsense might go down, don't wear loafers on a football pitch.

Masked Huracan Fans Storm Training Session And Attack Players In The Showers After Copa Argentina Exit

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By Chris Wright

Huracan in action at what looks like Meadow Lane

A mob of masked andseverelypeeved Huracan fans have stormed the club's dressing room after a training session yesterday and set about flogging several shades out of some of the players after the Argentinian side limped out of the national cup on Wednesday evening.

Brazilian Ronaldinho’s skills celebrated in flipbook form

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STOP WHAT YOU ARE DOING RIGHT NOW. Thank you, because this deserves respect. It might be a little bit nerdy, but you have to be hugely impressed by anyone that has spent such an incredible amount of time creating something that is essentially useless, but so so beautiful. Someone has posted a Youtube video which [.

Brazilian Damilo turns away from skied shot – and it goes in

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Brazilian football has it's fair share of downright crazy, but thankfully last night's shenanigans didn't involve riot police, fires or referees being kicked in the head. Instead, this was a ridiculous goal. Danilo of CRAC ensured that his side beat top flight Nautico in the Copa do Brasil thanks to a rather odd second half [.

Physio’s electronic buggy breaks down during Brazilian match

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You might think that the greatest thing in football might be a goalkeeper scoring or a dog getting on the pitch, but you'd be wrong. However, during a Pernambucan championship game between Sport Recife and Belo Jardim in Brazil, the electronic cart that takes off injured players broke down, and that's the greatest thing.

Waving The Flag: Nacional Edition

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The fans of Nacional made the world's largest flag for a football match. For some reason. It measures 600 x 50 meters and it basically engulfed 2/3 of an entire stadium during their Copa Libertadores match against Toluca.

And now, as is the case with every single one of these flags, banners, what have you, we're left with a question:

What the hell do they do with it now?