Of course, professional footballers are attracted to questionable body art like swarms of greenfly were to Nottingham Forest's gruesome 1995-97 yellow away shirt (bitter personal experience).
Turns out that Leroy Sané is no exception, with the Man City winger removing his shirt after Sunday's 5-0 routing of Watford to reveal a seriously large, seriously iffy back tattoo.
Javier Mascherano was forced to relive painful memories over the weekend when he came face to face with a tattoo tribute to his goal-denying sliding tackle at the 2014 World Cup.
With the score locked at 0-0 and mere seconds of normal time left to play in Argentina's drab semi-final against the Netherlands, Mascherano made up several metres on Arjen Robben to slam the door shut in dramatic fashion.
Having made just three Premier League appearancesfor Liverpool since the turn of the year, Alberto Moreno has had plenty of time to indulge inhis extra-curricular passions.
Basically, he's been filling his skin with ridiculous tattoos of animals wearing human clothes we're talking a tiger in a bandana, a panda sporting a monocle and a bull terrier wearing boxing gloves.
Photo: Gazzetta dello Sport
That man there, spread akimbo on the turf, is Amato Ciciretti once of Roma, now of Serie B side Benevento.
As of but a few days ago, Ciciretti is the proud owner of one of the absolute worst bits of body art we've ever had the misfortune of stumbling across.
Edin Dzeko scored a hat-trick (his 8th, 9th and 10th goals in 12 appearances so far this season) as Roma romped to a 4-1 victory over Viktoria Plzen to secure safe passage to the knock-out stages of the EuropaLeague last night.
However, the general consesus seems to be that Roma's other effort, scored by Diego Perotti, was the goal of the night being as though it came about via a cross-cum-shot-cum-definitely-a-cross in the rabona style.
He's even included the trademark symbol for crying out loud!
As a doff of the cap to Mark Clattenburg's outstanding new UEFA-approved tattoos, Pies deemed now to be as good a time as any to examine some of the very worst, most misguided examples of footballing body art to have been committed toepidermis in recent years.
We're fairly sure we don't have to go over the reasons that now is a really bad time to have a large tattoo of Adam Johnson indelibly inked about your person.
As such, one Man City fan has desperately appealed to E4 show 'Tattoo Fixers' to help him out of a tricky spot by covering up the oversizedtattoo of Johnson's signature he has stencilled onto his leg.
Palermo parted company with notoriously fidgety club president Maurizio Zamparini last month, thus bringing to an end 15 years of utterly manic managerial chopping and changing.
With a vancancy to fill right at the top, the Rosanero are now hoping to usher in a new era of serenity by appointing a younger, more level-headedreplacement.