TV Technicians dragged their camera equipment across the snow-packed stadium when last weekend's Juventus-Parma match was postponed! (via Reuters)

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Buenas! The realists and statisticians among you won't be surprised that Barcelona defeated the very loveable Valencia 2-0 last night. But as it seems, Madrid are frontrunners to win the La Liga, so el Blaugranas will be hoping to take home their 26th Spanish Cup title title.

It's now officially four crucial months to the Euro 2012 and following Fabio Capello's resignation last night, England has no manager to lead them to glory! That's exactly what Jack Wilshere groaned about ("Euro's is just around the corner and we have no manager?

Valencia's Aritz Aduriz articulates far more succinctly that we ever could why base layers are bad. Bad, we say! Image: JOSE JORDAN/AFP/Getty Images.

Sometimes, it's the little things that make life worth living, isn't it?

Alright. And maybe some slightly larger things.

Serie A

Catania 1-1 Roma

There were only twenty-five minutes to play in Catania and Roma's rescheduled match from January, but this was long enough for Erik Lamela to show off his assets to the fullest.

Image: REUTERS/Sergio Moraes.

With our penchant for crap hats and whips, you might say we're the 'Indiana Jones's' of the fluffy football world.

With this in mind, we ventured into the depths of the Copa Libertadores last night and found this photo of Wagner (r) being tackled/molested (depending on how loose your definition on on-pitch discipline is) by the magnificently named Hugo Nervo.

The Swiss Super League, you say? Well, yes. This could certainly persuade us to spend more time with our friends in Switzerland. Image: REUTERS/Romina Amato.

Juventus will be facing Milan tomorrow in the Coppa Italia and unfortunately for both teams, they will not be getting a taste of the Ibrahimedic. He slapped (or rather 'nudged') Napoli's Salvatore Aronica in the face on Sunday something you shouldn't be surprised about, given Ibra's track record and is expected to serve a three-match ban.

Juventus will be facing Milan tomorrow in the Coppa Italia and unfortunately for both teams, they will not be getting a taste of the Ibrahimedic. He slapped (or rather 'nudged') Napoli's Salvatore Aronica in the face on Sunday something you shouldn't be surprised about, given Ibra's track record and is expected to serve a three-match ban.

The title race is heating up across several of the domestic leagues, which means so should our Man Candy detectors.

Except they're not.

Seems they're having a bit of technical difficulty picking up on their targets, if you know what we mean.

Images: AFP PHOTO / JOHN MACDOUGALL; AP Photo/Kirsty Wigglesworth; REUTERS/Alessandro Garofalo.

Welcome to a slightly late edition of La Liga Lunes (La Liga Monday!) Over the weekend, the Women's FIFA Ballon d'Or winner Homare Sawa met up with Barcelona maestro Xavi at the club's training ground. Her team, INAC Kobe from the Japanese Women's league, played a friendly against Barcelona's female squad (highlights below).

With increasing confusion in the Premier League over which tackles should or should not be punished, an attempt to teach players what is acceptable is being made in home video form. "How to tackle" DVDs will be sent to clubs next week because if there's one thing professional footballers will pay attention to, it's instructional videos.

""Football can go to hell if this is the situation.""
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Those were the words of Al-Ahly's star player Mohamed Aboutrika in the wake of the tragedy in Port Said, calling for the Egyptian league to be suspended indefinitely. "Crowds are dying in front of us, and there aren't any police or security forces," he said.

Futbolitinos, the transfer deadline window is now shut! Seedy agents all became instant millionaires when "under the table" deals were finalized yesterday, including Coutinho's loan move from Inter Milan to Espanyol (above).

Image: REUTERS/Eddie Keogh.

John Terry will go on trial for his alleged racist comments against Anton Ferdinand on 9th July, just nine days after the conclusion of EURO 2012. Terry, who will captain England in the tourney, pleaded not guilty to a 'racially-aggravated public order offence' via a solicitor at a court hearing this morning.

Que triste! It isn't a good week for fans of the US Women's Professional Soccer (WPS) league. The board announced it would be "suspending play" this year due to complex legal issues involving a former club owner. This matters because some of the world's best female players ply their trade there including Abby Wambach, Marta, Alex Morgan and Hope Solo.

The buzz surrounding the Spanish Burgos province these days has been remarkable. They are of course, home to Mirandes, the Spanish third-division team that have made it to the semi-finals of the Copa del Ray! Mirandes will meet Athletic Bilbao tonight at their modest 6,000-seater stadium, which was expanded yesterday to accommodate another 1,700 visiting fans.

Messi shows frustration in draw against Villarreal (Photo: REUTERS/Heino Kalis)

Barcelona saw their La Liga title aspirations take a serious hit after suffering a goalless draw against Villarreal at El Madrigal on Saturday night.

Another road game, another setback.

It has been the same story all year long; with Barca now having dropped 13 points in league play away from the Camp Nou this season.

Image: REUTERS/Giorgio Perottino.

How cool would it be if there was a superhero whose job it was to pursue footballers and pull their shorts down for the benefit of watching?!

Well, fantasise no more, people. Juve's Fabio Quagliarella is here and he's going to rescue us from the horror of thigh-free week days.

You can argue that everything Barca does these days is being scrutinized or subject to unfair criticism. But it's hard to deny the club's latest tribute to a journalist who passed away and spent his life reporting on the club. That's affectionate dedication for you!

Last week prior to the club's normal press conference, first-team players Xavi, Puyol, Valdés and Iniesta along with Pep Guardiola observed a silent tribute to Dani Montesinos, who formerly worked for Spanish TV and Barca TV.

It's always a good idea to stand out from the crowd, especially in a sea of Hamburg-ers! / via Reuters

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If you're heading to the bookstore this weekend, look out for Leo Messi on the cover of the latest 'TIME' magazine (International Edition). When your face graces the cover of TIME, you f**king MADE IT! Unfortunately, the lovely Yanks don't seem to think a Messi cover is worthy of the USA edition.

Pedro celebrates goal that moves Barcelona through to next round of Copa (Photo: REUTERS/Albert Gea)

In a battle of titans, Barcelona held on to defeat Real Madrid 4-3 on aggregate and eliminate the defending Champions from the Copa del Rey.

It was everything a clasico should be: a high-octane encounter of offensive brilliance and heart-stopping tension.

Barcelona [2 : 2] Real Madrid
No. of Yellow Cards : 9
No. Of Red Cards : 1

Somewhere beneath this 'Blaugrana Happiness Pile' lies Pedro, who scored the opening goal in Barca's 2-2 draw with Real Madrid at the Nou Camp last night.

It's clear that Michel Telo's Brazilian hit song 'Ai Seu Te Pego' is still popular within the Italian football scene, or at least to Milan's 'Carioca' Club of Robinho, Thiago Silva and Pato.

During Milan's 3-0 defeat of Novaro last night, Robinho did the famous dance move after netting the second goal.

NOTICIAS

There's nothing a little mid-match Tango won't do for you just ask Valencia's Pablo Hernandez! The striker was highly instrumental in Los Che's 4-1 Copa del Ray win over city rival Levante last night setting up the goals and missing a few for himself.

The African Nations Cup kicks off this weekend, which provides a handy opportunity for under performing league players to show what they're about! Unfortunately, perennial favourites Egypt failed to qualify for this alongside Algeria, Cameroon and Nigeria.

Abidal fires the winning blast to defeat Real Madrid (Photo: REUTERS/Susana Vera)

Barcelona mounted a second half comeback to defeat Real Madrid 2-1 at the Santiago Bernabeu, extracting a measure of vengeance for their defeat in last year's Copa del Rey Final at the hands of their eternal rivals.

We're now officially 30 months away from the World Cup in Brazil, which means there isn't much time for the country to start finalizing some basic rules. When it comes to football of course, 'basic rules' really range from the sale of beers to deciding on how much 'fiesta' (partying) is allowed in the stadiums.

Barcelona celebrated Eric Abidal's goal in their 2-1 win over Real Madrid last night. Abidal, who has officially completed his cancer recovery, is certainly an inspiration to all in football! / via Reuters

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They won 2-1. Imagine what Xavi would have done to celebrate winning the Balon D'or. Image via twitter.

Real talk: how many of you guestimated the measurements of Xavi's youknowwhat?

Copa Del Rey

Real Madrid 1-2 Barcelona

No Pepe, we couldn't believe our eyes either.

Si no pudiste ver el partido de hoy el clásico español, el que paraliza al mundo futbolistico, te cuento lo siguiente,fue en resumen muy similar al partido anterior, error del portero al inicio del juego Real Madrid se adelanta, echa el camion atras y Barcelona en el segundo tiempo remonta y le pone un baile a los merengues en su propia casa.

Raul, Klaas-Jan Huntelaar and their Schalke 04 team-mates spent the day today visiting the Auguste-Victoria coal mine in Marl, Germany to build team spirit and to show the solidarity with their supporters. Image: Reuters.

Yes, you're looking at the sticky note belonging to Jose Mourinho from Saturday's match between Real Madrid and Mallorca. Granted, his handwriting looks a little like your 7-year-old sister's when she's penning a poem about Prince Charming in a pink cape, but who cares?

It's Monday, which means it's time for your Premiership Party! Maybe you'd be hopping a little higher on the streets today if you were a Swansea futbolita (pass the bread kindly now, love) but what's football if there are no upsets involved?

USA's Shannon Box controls the ball during a U.S. women's national training camp earlier this week. The squad has started preparing for the Olympics in August this year. Get it girl! / via Reuters

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Ricardo Quaresma is sort of the quintessential flashy footballer. The type of gent whose game translates better to YouTube and the video game of your choice rather than a pitch of appropriate measure. Turns out his lifestyle is equally as flashy. He was the victim of an armed robbery this morning, of things which were on his person.

Warning. This picture of Erik Lamela could cause muscle spasm and/or blindness. Image: AP Photo/Riccardo De Luca.

Domestic cup competitions dominate the Midweek Results this week, but for once, that's not a bad thing.

Go ahead and run along now, Kickettes. It's not polite to keep these pretty footballers waiting.

Ahhhh! Sadly, there was no such thing as post-marriage luck for Alvaro Negredo last night as Sevilla crashed to a narrow Spanish Cup defeat in the hands of Valencia, despite their 2-1 win. Painfully, it was based on the away goals rule and those are always the hardest to bear!

Image: REUTERS/Samrang Pring.

"Size has never been a problem for me."

Er... we beg to differ, Fabio. You may claim not to remember the Photoshop D&G re-touch incident of 2006, but it is scorched into our frontal lobes to the extent that we can call it to mind on closed eyes command.

We've spent a lot of time fantasising that Thomas Muller will one day gaze dreamily into our eyes. Honestly? We're a bit scared of the repercussions now. Image: REUTERS/Adnan Abidi.

It's that time of year again, folks. Yes, while you're labouring through the debris of another expensive holiday season, hiding whenever the postman comes 'round for fear of your credit card statement being delivered, rich footballers are off getting free swag.