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English Premier League

For Those of You Watching in Black and White…

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Ahoy there. In a week which has seen both our glorious leader have a straightforward confectionary run cost him the contents of his pockets in Madrid, Pele back the move to Stratford and Jonathan Woodgate being talked up for a hop across town to our odious neighbours, it's probably just as well some actual football is being played this afternoon to take our mind off things.

Fulham Are Sooo 2011

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Gee willikers. The year is dwindling away from us at an almighty rate. We're down to the last few hours. Bloody get on with it, I say. Or cancel NYE altogether. Tottenham are in action tomorrow and the last thing we need is to miss it because our poor livers have turned into a hot pâté of boozy mush.

The Rest

London to San Siro via Bloomfield Road

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So, we popped our collective noggins out of the window on Friday morning, braving the b*stard chill of winter against our delicate features, and asked the nearest little street urchin to tell us the news. You boy, what day is this? Why, it's the day of the Champions League draw, sir. And you've drawn AC Milan.