The year is 2010AD, Girls Aloud have split, Jedward are ruling the world with over 237 million albums sold, forcing many a music fan to throw themselves of various bridges throughout the world, Sir Dexy Longshot has left UKFF and now writes for Gardeners Weekly & Spurs are Premier League champions.

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For many, cheating is an ugly blight on the beautiful game. Players who break the rules are regularly vilified and criticized. But cheating, when used effectively, can be a great way to help your team out. It is so much easier to score from the penalty spot than from open play with all those pesky defenders around.

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Congratulations FIFA, they've got the World Cup they wanted now haven't they, and I hope their proud of how they got it. It was a ridiculous decision to seed the World Cup play-offs in the first place, and ultimately prevent the the hard-work in qualifying of teams like Ukraine, Bosnia and of course the Republic of Ireland.

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As clear as night follows day, summer follows spring, and Phil Brown is a self promoting moron, Arsenal will get themselves in an almighty pickle with injuries long before the Christmas break.

The tradition has been continuing for many a long year, and with the news now of another injury to a reserve left back, Arsene Wenger is going to have to shuffle the pack again to get a team out at Sunderland capable of getting a result.

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Last season, I wrote a piece that attributed a song to each Premier League team that reflected their current status or something that was going on at the club at the time. At the risk of going over old ground, I thought I would update the songs for the teams in this years Premiership with my current musings.

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Aston Villa 1 (Platt) Bradford City 0. Old Second Division. 1988. This was the first football match I ever watched and I instantly fell in love with Villa's goal scoring hero, a fish shaped man called David Platt. I later came to realise he wasn't that good but the point is that, at the time, I thought he was a footballing god.

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Look at that beautiful surface.
We'll give you the press release on this one so we don't miss anything important...props to Jay, Justin, Michael and anyone else who helped them along the way!
The Kansas City Wizards announced Monday that the Sports Turf Managers Association (STMA) has named CommunityAmerica Ballpark's playing surface the Professional Soccer Field of the Year. Click to continue reading...

In the famous words of Alan Partridge the French spend all their time chomping on onions going he hor, he hor, he hor! This of course, is not true, as a European footballing nation only the Italians and the Germans have a better record. Jealous? We sure are.

For those of you who were to young to remember, the French had a sensational side in the 80's winning the European Championship in 1984 and reaching the World Cup Semi's in 1982, before the Germans cheated their way to the final.

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"Low lie the Fields of Athenry, Where once we watched the small free birds fly!!!"

This Saturday at 8pm, I'll will be glued to the box with the rest of The Emerald Isle to watch the darlings of the nation again defy the odds against greater foes to reach the final of the greatest show on Earth.

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I'll clarify one thing. Missing the cut and thrust of league football is a big negative but the good thing about International week is that it provides for ample reflection. Maybe too much of it sometimes. Perhaps that comes with age.

Watching the La Liga review I learnt a bit more about age.

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The Times columnist and Spiked magazine editor, Mick Hume, has taken some time out of his busy schedule to speak to RoM.

Scott the Red: How long have you been following United?
Mick Hume: My whole life since I was seven anyway, in 1967. I am the stereotypical Surrey Red, from the suburbs where there was no professional football.

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It's a bit early to be making broad statements about the title challengers, but broad statements promote debate, and I'm all about the debating. This season will be a 2 horse race between Chelsea and Arsenal for the premier league.

Man Utd simply lack any flair what so ever, Liverpool sadly have blown it by not having enough players who can play football, and Manchester City don't seem to have the right manager just yet.

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As football remembered the fallen over the weekend, one of the most poignant acts of remembrance came at Tynecastle.13 Hearts players volunteered to fight in 1914. The McCrae's Battalion website takes up the story:In August 1914 Great Britain went to war with Germany. As eager young men flocked to join Lord Kitchener's volunteer army, professional football became the target of a vitriolic Click to continue reading...

As some of you may have read on here before, I'm a big fan of Michael Owen and have already written a couple of blogs on the Man Utd hitman, in which both somewhere champion Owen going to next summers World Cup. But after Fabio Capello revealed his latest squad for Saturday's game against Brazil last night, I think we can finally assume that Owen's South African dream is all but over.

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The oldest professional football club believe it or not faces the possibility of court proceedings for non-payment of taxes.

Months after a Qadbak Investments, a Middle East company, whose owners remain largely unidentified bought over Notts County, they are faced with a huge tax bill which had accrued under Blenheim 1862, the former parent company.

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A 21-year-old Saudi striker Nawaf Al Abed scored the definitive fastest goal ever recorded in a professional football match. The match was played between Al Hilal and Al Shoalah and he scored from the halfline for Al Hilal 2 seconds after kickoff.The ref had just about finished blowing the whistle to indicate the start of the game when he had to blow it again.

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This Sunday was fairly familiar for me. I was sporting a cracking hangover and woke up wondering what happened the previous night. The ‘Big Clash' of the day, as usual, didn't match the hype that it was given. Patrice Evra failed to remember he's a great left-back against Chelsea and an angry Scotsmen made more comments about a referee.

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With the Gunners virtually playing every team of the park it got us all talking, how good is their current squad and were they right to get rid of some of those has beens? Here's our Ultimate 11 of players that have at one stage of their career either played for the Gunners or been on trial. Our conclusion is Wenger was right with the exception of Palios and Upson, what are your thoughts?

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This is one of the most bizarre things you can expect to see at a professional football match. With Chelsea leading 1-0 against Manchester United, Salomon Kalou was getting ready to come on for Didier Drogba in the 83rd minute of the game. However, who would have expected a Chelsea supporter to look so calm and collected as he brushed his teeth in the crowd.

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This weeks lovely lady is blonde bombshell Emma Bradley. The gorgeous Emma has a degree in nursing and is now a full time model. We've never seen a nurse that fit!

If you would like to be our girl of the week then e-mail girls@ukfootballfinder.co.uk

Age

22

Martial status

Single (Call the whoop doctor)

Location

Gloucester

Worst chat up line

Fet your coat you've pulled!

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Sport companies and clubs have, in living memory certainly, always gone hand in hand with advertising. Formula 1 has given much wide- spread criticised publicity to cigarette companies on the sides to their big red engines, cricket players are sponsored by airlines and football teams are sponsored by companies by all walks of life.

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Ajax v Feyenoord, Holland

History
It all began as a clash of cultures. Feyenoord were supported by the dock workers from the built up part of Rotterdam, while Ajax by the richer, more sophiscated side of Amsterdam.

Magic moments
This fixture is full of goals, goals, super goals as big Frank frank would say.

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Childs Play

Soffo The Greek belled me last Wednesday with an invite of a freebie at The Emirates to watch Arsenal V Liverpool. I arrived to a packed Stadium but couldn't help but wonder if I'd been sucked into a May 09 Emiratian time warp. Wasn't most of this side on the pitch for the FA youth Cup final in spring?

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At the beginning of season 08-09, I think you could have had very good odds on Carlton Cole scoring 5 Premiership goals or more, becoming the fulcrum of the West Ham team and then breaking in to the England squad. 15 months is a long time ago and in that time Carlton Cole has morphed from a clumsy, well-built support striker who weighed in with the odd goal to a feared centre forward, capable of giving the very best defenders a real working over.

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For a long while there, Stephen Appiah was an international footballer only. The midfielder has not played a kick of club soccer since late 2007, but still managed to captain Ghana through a successful World Cup 2010 qualification campaign. Which is ridiculously impressive when you think about it.

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West Ham may well be going down this season with a string of useless displays and a home record that even Derby County would be proud of. However, if the Hammers had kept hold of their top players where would they be now? Top 10, top 6, top 4 or even challenging for the title? Here's our Ultimate 11 of Ex West Ham players still plying their trade in the Premier League today, unfortunately for them, for other teams.

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This weeks little lovely lad is the delightful JJ Finch. A full time model from Essex. JJÂ has won many beauty comps in her life and here's to many more!!

If you would like to be our girl of the week then e-mail girls@ukfootballfinder.co.uk

Age

21

Martial status

Single (Call the whoop doctor)

Location

Essex

Worst chat up line

they're all as bad as each other

Occupation

model

Supports

Arsenal

Fav player

Theo Walcott & Cristiano Ronaldo

Fav film

Titantic

Fav band

Pussycat Dolls only because i absolutely love Nicole Scherzinger

Finest hour

there's been few.

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The 23 member shortlist for the 2009 FIFA World Player of the Year award has been announced. The winner will be announced on December 21, 2009. Cristiano Ronaldo, Lionel Messi and Fernando Torres, who finished first, second and third respectively last year, are also in the running for this year's award. Click to continue reading...

The pressure cooker of life is slowly grinding people down, sites like this provide people with a light relief from what we see as the burden of everyday life. Sports professionals are no different with an ever increasing demand placed upon their minds and bodies, is it any wonder then we see burn out occurring all the time.

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Marlon King is twenty-eight years old. His contract with Wigan Athletic was worth £35,000 per week. He has scored twelve Premier League goals in his entire career. Never has in the field of human endeavour has such mediocrity been so handsomely rewarded. For this reason and this doesn't obviously doesn't even take into account what he has been sent to prison for and if nothing else comes from this grimly predictable story, at least Dave Whelan may be breathing a sigh of relief at getting such an expensive burden upon Wigan Athletic's wage bill.

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Swedish legend Henrik Larsson had an emotional farewell from professional football on Wednesday night as he played his last ever professional game for Swedish side Helsingborg. Larsson had announced his intent to retire at the end of this season but decided to bow out one game early in order to play his last match in front of the Helsinborg supporters.

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Another weekend passes us by and still the big teams are falling over themselves to not take the initiative in the Premiership title race. Of the top 6 teams, only Chelsea won making the league one on the most open in recent history. Over the past few seasons, one or two teams have really stood out come the end of October.

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Andy Mitten has written the fabulous book "Glory Glory" which documents behind the scenes stories from the glorious 90's era from the players' perspective.

RoM gave away a copy of his book as a prize for the Cantona mask competition this week.

Mitten took some time out of his incredibly busy schedule at the moment to speak to RoM about his United experiences as well as the best bits about writing this book.

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After Jermaine Pennant came out from his Spanish Villa and criticised Benetiz for miss-management of players, it felt like the final nail in the coffin for the Spanish manager.

A poor result in mid-week against a Lyon team not at the peak of their powers looked like silencing Rafa once and for all.

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   Photo by ISIphotos.com

Being late to a game, and then tweeting about it, wasn't the best sequence of events for Jozy Altidore, but it looks as though the punishment for his actions will be limited to the one-match suspension and fine he has already been hit with.

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