Newcastle Utd

Newcastle United

‘Cool, Young, Fit, Articulate, Good Looking, First Class’ – When Michael Owen Attempted To Hawk His Services With Glossy Sales Brochure, 2009 (Photos)

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Almost a decade on from his departure, Michael Owen is still widely begrudged by Newcastle United fans and with fairly good reason.

The striker's four years at St James' Park were riddled with injuries and it's the common consensus that he simply gave up trying toward the tail end as he continued to siphon his vast wages from of the club coffers.

Retro Football: Newcastle Fans Dress ‘Angel Of The North’ Statue In Giant Alan Shearer Shirt, 1998 (Photo & Video)

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Photo: Chronicle Live

Originally denounced as an eyesore by some, The Angel of the North has now been welcoming weary pilgrims back to Gateshead and Newcastle for two decades.

Anthony Gormley's imposing steel sculpture was completed in February of 1998 and has now been in situ on Birtley hill, arms outstretched above the A1, for 20 years.

The Descent: Newcastle Fan Keeps Himself Amused By Sliding Down Bannister During Dismal 3-0 Chelsea Defeat (Video)

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There was precious little to cheer for the travelling Newcastle fans who made the 570-mile round trip to watch their side get pasted by Chelsea in the FA Cup fourth round on Sunday afternoon.

Indeed, shortly after the Toon fell 3-0 down to 72nd-minute Marcos Alonso freekick,one intrepid supporter took it upon himself to buoy his wandering brethren's spirits with a high-octane stunt in the upper tier.

Arsenal: Mesut Ozil Stunner Against Newcastle Fires Gunners Back Into Top Four (Video)

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Mesut Ozil was the match-winner at the Emirates on Saturday, with the German firing Arsenal to a 1-0 over Newcastle courtesy of a wonderful striker.

With Aaron Ramsey out injured, Jack Wilshere made a second consecutive Premier League start in midfield, while youngester Ainsley Maitland-Niles lined out at left-back.

Classic Football Adverts: Alan Shearer Is Wooden As You Like In Timeless McDonald’s ‘Autograph’ Sketch, 1998 (Video)

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"Woor'll 'ave a fillet-oo-fish an a box of chickn dippahs an meerk it snappy lad..."

With all the will in the world, with his furrowed brow and voice less melodious than a dot-matrix printer, Alan Shearer simply is not a font of natural charisma.

As such, it shouldn't come as much surprise that the-then Newcastle striker struggled to inject much life into his dialogue after being plonked in the middle of a McDonald's advert duringthe run-up to the 1998 World Cup.

Liverpool: Same Old Story For Klopp And Co. As Wasteful Reds Draw At Newcastle (Video)

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Rafa Benitez extended his unbeaten run against former club Liverpool at St. James' Park on Sunday, with Newcastle United holding the Reds to a 1-1 draw.

It was a familiar story for Jurgen Klopp, who watched his Liverpool side once again fail to make the most of their chances.

Retro Football: Newcastle Chairman Freddy Shepherd Offers To Carry Michael Owen Back To Liverpool, 2007 (Video)

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Sad news is reaching Pies this afternoon that former Newcastle chairman Freddy Shepherd, a central figure in the club's bamboozling recent history, has passed away at the age of 76.

Of course, our thoughts immediately turned to the Geordie businessman's long-running tit-for-tat spat with Michael Owen, who bore the brunt of several outbursts from the Shepherd foghorn.

Football Tat: Newcastle Fan Who Punched A Police Horse, Immortalised In Oil Painting Form (Photo)

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Back in 2013, Newcastle fan Barry Rogerson assured himself of a place in Geordie Valhalla by squaring up to a police horse amid a city-centre skirmish that broke out after a fractious Tyne-Wear derby match at St James' Park.

Barry later apologised for thumping Bud the wonder-horse, claiming his medication was to blame and that he'd never intentionally hurt an animal as he owns some fish of his own.

Classic Moments: Cheick Tiote Scores Career-Defining Volley To Decimate Arsenal’s Four-Goal Lead, 2011 (Video)

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Uponthe rubbishly tragic news of his untimely death, Pies thought it only properto pay tribute to the late Cheick Tiote in the only we could proffer forth by once again revisiting his utterly brilliant goal against Arsenal in 2011.

You all know the context: Newcastle 0-4 down at half-time, 2-4 down in the 75th minute, and 3-4 down in the 87th.

RIP Cheick Tiote – Former Newcastle Midfielder Dies, Aged 30, After Collapsing In Training

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Sad, sad news is reaching us that ex-Newcastle midfielder Cheick Tiote has died suddenly at the age of 30.

Unsubstantiated reports of Tiote's death flooded Twitter this afternoon, with many believing it to be a hoax.

Unfortunately, the tragic news have since been confirmed by Emanuele Palladino, the Ivorian's representative:

It is with deep sadness I confirm that Cheick Tiote sadly passed away earlier today after collapsing in training.

Belter: Newcastle’s New Home Kit Features Red Names And Numbers For First Time Since 1992/93 (Photos & Video)

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Photo: @NUFC/Twitter

If you'll forgive the slight saturation, we have yet another new and important update on Newcastle's home kit for 2017/18.

As we've seen through a succession of recent leaks, the 125th anniversary strip is shaping up to be a bit of a retro-tinged classic and the latest detail to emerge might just seal the deal.

So Close: Newcastle’s Suave New 2017/18 Anniversary Home Kit Ruined By Ugly, Chintzy Sponsor Logo (Photo)

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Photo via Footy Headlines

Just when it looked like Newcastle were ready to furnish themselves with a super sleek new kit for their return to the Premier League, leaked images suggest they've gone and ruined the whole vibe with a tacky-as-you-like sponsors logo.

Last month, a batch of photoscirculated on social media purporting to be the Toon's lovely new strip, which hinted at areturn forthe old polo-style collar, narrowed stripes and a special '125th anniversary' club crest.

Championship: Newcastle Crowned Champions And Blackburn Relegated On Nerve-Shredding Final Day (Photos & Video)

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With the top spot and the final relegation berth still on the line going into the finalmatch, the Championship certainly delivered in terms of last day jitters at both end of the table.

Newcastle were finally crowned champions of a league they were supposed to walk, hammering Barnsley 3-0 while fellow contenders Brighton succumbed to a late equaliser against Aston Villa to finish up in second.

Arrests Made As Newcastle And West Ham Raided By HMRC Over Investigation Into Transfer Dealings

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Both Newcastle and West Ham United have been raided this morning following an HMRC investigation into potentially iffy transfer dealings.

According to the Independent, both St. James' Park and the London Stadium were the subject of warrants, and Newcastle's managing director, Lee Charnley, has been arrested.

Championship: Newcastle Back In Premier League After Thumping Win Against Preston (Photos & Highlights)

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Newcastle United are back in the big time after the Magpiessecured their place in next season's Premier League courtesy of aresounding 4-1 win at home to Preston.

Ayoze Perez opened the scoring for the hosts on seven minutes from a corner.

However, just seven minutes later Preston drew level, courtesy of Jordan Hugill.

Newcastle’s New 125th Anniversary Home Shirt Looks Like A Bobby Dazzler In Waiting (Photos)

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Photo via Footy Headlines

Based on the leaked images they've seen in recent weeks, Footy Headlines have gone ahead and mocked up an image of whatthey expect Newcastle United's new 125th anniversary shirt will look like.

With a strict monochrome design, narrowed stripes and a polo collar, the 2017/18 Toon jersey will hark back to a simpler, better time a time when the front of their kits weren't plastered with tacky adverts for loan sharks and leisurewear workhouses.

FAIL: Referee Disallows Newcastle Penalty Goal Before Bizarrely Awarding Free-Kick To Burton (Video)

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Newcastle United went back to the top of the Championship on Wednesday night, courtesy of a hard-fought 1-0 win at home to Burton Albion.

However, despite the win, Rafa Benitez and co. were left fuming after referee Keith Stroud made an utter dog's dinner of a Matt Ritchie penalty kick.

Newcastle Fan Claims He Had To Jump Onto Pitch During Huddersfield Match Because ‘His Tattoo Was Hurting’

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The Newcastle fan who got himself pinched for attempting to invadethe pitch duringthe recent 3-1 win overHuddersfield Town has claimed he simply had no choice but to encroach.

Reece Smailes was charged and subsequently pleaded guilty to entering the playing area when he spilled over the safety barrierfollowing Dwight Gayle's 91st-minute goal at The John Smith's Stadium on 4th March.

Newcastle Seize Back Control Of Championship Title Race With Flukiest Goal Of The Season So Far (Video)

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Mohamed Diame's face says it all.

Newcastle wrested back control of the Championship title race with a 2-1 victory over Brighton at the AMEX on Tuesday night a result that saw the two sides swap places at the summit of the table once again.

Having trailed to a Glenn Murray penalty for the majority of the match, the Toon scored twice late onto snaffle the victory and reclaim the top spot from their defeated hosts.

FAIL: Newcastle Goalkeeper Karl Darlow Drops Almighty Clanger In 2-2 Draw With Norwich (Video)

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Sod PSG-Barca; the real four-goal thriller of the night unfolded at Carrow Road, where Norwich and Newcastle played out a frenetic 2-2 draw.

Having gone 1-0 up less than 25 seconds after kick-off, Newcastle were swiftly pegged back by two quick goals from Jacob Murphy and Cameron Jerome.

The latter was a real peach, with 'keeper Karl Darlow claiming the assist courtesy of a truly woefulattempted clearance that was sliced directly into Jerome's path.

Official: Cheick Tiote Leaves Newcastle To Join Beijing Enterprises Group FC (Photo)

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After months and months of negotiations, Cheick Tiote has finally brought his seven-year stint at Newcastle to an end and left forthe bright lights of China.

It was initially reported that Tiote was in talks to join former Toon teammate Papiss Cisse at Shandong Luneng, but today it's been announced the Ivorian has signed for Beijing Enterprises Group FC on a two-year deal.

‘The Worst Advice I’ve Ever Received’ – Newcastle Fan Buys 56 Train Tickets To Cut Cost Of Journey To Oxford United (Photo)

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One thrifty Newcastle fan took evasive action in adesperate attempt to pare down the price of watching his side play Oxford United in the fourth round of the FA Cup.

Staring down the barrel of a 500-mile round rail trip, Johnny Haywood sought the council of a friend, who advised him to book the whole thing in 'split' tickets to save money.

‘I Didn’t Know Who My Teammates Were’ – Andy Carroll Admits He Had To Google Several Liverpool Players After Joining Them

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At the behest of the Daily Mail, Andy Carroll fritter away an indeterminate period of time chatting to Jamie Redknapp recently the poor sod.

The pair discussed Carroll's career to date, including his expensive and rather ill-fated stint at Redknapp's old club, Liverpool.

After acknowledgingthat things"never really happened" at Anfield, Carroll also admitted that he didn't know who someof his new teammates were upon signing for the Reds in 2011 partly because, by his own admission, he doesn't really like watching football.

Newcastle Coach Michael Antia Has ‘Geordie To English’ Translation Sheet Pinned Up In His Office (Photo)

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Squatting on top of the Championship, scoring goals for fun and unbeaten in their last nine games, all is rosy in the Newcastle United garden at the moment.

Indeed, it hasn'ttaken Rafa Benitez long to restore a sense of optimism and pride at St James' Park, though it would appear that there is still one aspect of life in the North East that his coaching are having a toughtime getting to grips with.

Reports: Newcastle United ‘Hold Talks’ Over Return Of Iconic 1990s Shirt Sponsor

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Fantastic news for anybody permanently living in the past i.e, all Newcastle fans with the word on the wire being that the club are "in talks" with Newcastle Brown Ale to reinstate the brewery as their principal shirt sponsor.

The iconic big blue star graced the Newcastle kitthroughout the 1980s and into the mid-to-late 1990s, featuring prominently during the club's last flush of success.

Jermaine Jenas Reveals He Turned Down ‘Weird’ Offer From Man Utd Before Joining Newcastle In 2002

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Jermaine Jenas has revealed that he turned down a 'weird'approach from Manchester United before he signed for Newcastle in the summer of 2002.

Having played his way up through the ranks and impressed during his debut senior season at hometown club Nottingham Forest, the Premier League vultures were circling as Uniteds Manchester, Leeds and Newcastle all expressed an interest in procuring the 18-year-old.

Newcastle: Dramatic Comeback Win Over Norwich Causes Rafa Benitez To Levitate In Mid-Air (Photo)

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Despite being 3-2 down as the clock ticked over into the 94th minute, Newcastle somehow still managed to wrangle a victory out of last night's Championship blow-out against Norwich at St James' Park.

A 95th-minute equaliser from Yoan Gouffran was swiftly followed by a manic 96th-minute winner from Dwight Gayle, with the mood inside the stadium perhaps best described as 'ecstatic' as the final whistle sounded almost immediately thereafter.

Retro Football: Andy Cole Poses With AK-47 And Heavy Artillery To Shill For Pepsi Max, 1994 (Photos)

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Andy Cole first cultivated his reputation as a Premier League hotshot at Newcastle United, where he scored 69goals in 86 appearances over the course of his two seasons.

Given his outstanding predatoryprowess, it was only natural that brands were lining up to use his likeness to shilltheir wares.

Retro Football: Remembering The Great Newcastle United Fashion Show Of 1995 (Photos)

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Newcastle United and the state thereof, circa 1995

The year was 1995 and everything was rosy in Newcastle United's garden.

With St James' Park having just been redeveloped into a gigantic all-seater cauldron and a stellar team full of expensive new additions, the Toon were resurgent.

Newcastle: Alan Shearer Statue Unveiled Outside St James’ Park Almost A Decade Later Than Scheduled (Photo)

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Almost a decade since it was first commissioned by former Newcastle chairman Freddy Shepherd, the club have finally got round to unveiling a statue of Alan Shearer outside St James' Park.

The five-metre bronze figure apparently cost £250,000 when it was first ordered in 2007, with Shepherd paying for the whole thing outright.

Newcastle’s New 2016/17 Away Shirt Is Really Rather Nice Apart From The One Obvious Blemish (Photos)

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Newcastle have unfurled the shirt that they'll be wearing on their travels in the Championship this season and, dare we say, it's a bit of a bloomin' looker.

The deep navy shirt features a smart button-down collar as well as a 'flame orange' band emblazoned across the chest, in which squatsthe proverbial fly in the ointment that sponsor.

Moussa Sissoko Announces Intent To Leave Newcastle, Issues Brazen Come-And-Get-Me Plea To ‘Beautiful’ Arsenal

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Despite contributing very little of note to the Newcastle cause for months on end, Moussa Sissoko has decided that now is the time to leave in order to pursue his lifelong dream of joining Arsenal.

On the all-too-familiarpremise that his place in the France squad would be jeopardised if he were to continue playing for the Toon in the Championship next season, Sissiko has openly announced that he's leaving St James' Park this summer.

End Of A Slightly Daft Era: Steven Taylor Released By Newcastle After 21 Long Years At The Club

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It's a day we never thought we'd see arrive, but Newcastle have confirmed today that Steven Taylorwill be released upon the expiry of his current contract at the end of the month.

Taylor, now 30,first joined the Newcastle youth ranks from Wallsend Boys Club at the age of seven, back in the primordial mists of 1995.

Videos

Swedish TV Analyses Tackle By Steward On Pitch Invader During Crystal Palace’s Draw With Newcastle (Video)

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Crystal Palace's 1-1 draw with Newcastle United on Sunday produced a few sizable talking points on Sunday, with the Eagles awarded an arguably soft penalty in the second-half.

However, Swedish sports channel Viasat were far more interested in an incident involving a wayward fan, who raced onto the pitch during the game, initially supping from a bottle of beer.

Retro Football: Kevin Keegan Calms Newcastle Fans Down On Steps Of St James’ Park After Selling Andy Cole To Man Utd, 1995 (Photos)

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It's difficult to fathom given the omni-coverage we're steeped in these days, but 23 years ago this very day, a seismic football transfer went through without so much as a preceding whisper.

Halfway through the 1994/95 Premier League season, Newcastle goal-glutton Andy Cole was sold to Manchester United in a British record deal.

Championship: Denis Odoi Produces Moment Of Outrageous Skill As Fulham Down Favourites Newcastle (Video)

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With Rafa Benitez at the helm, an experienced squad and money in the bank, Newcastle are many people's favourites to win the Championship this season. However, in the season-opener on Friday night, the Magpies went down 1-0 to Fulham, with the impressive Denis Odoi lighting up Craven Cottage with a piece of fantastic original skill.

Arsenal

EFL Cup Quarter-Final Draw: Arsenal Host Southampton, Liverpool Face Leeds And Man Utd Set For West Ham Clash In Last Eight

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Wednesday night's draw for the EFL Cup quarter-finals has been kind to the three remaining heavyweights, after a night of action which saw Manchester Utd get one over on local rivals Manchester City, West Ham knock out Chelsea in east London and Southampton beat struggling Sunderland 1-0 at St. Mary's.

EFL Cup Draw: Man Utd Face Man City, Liverpool Host Tottenham And Chelsea Travel To West Ham In Mouth-Watering Quarter-Final Draw

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Pep Guardiola and Jose Mourinho are set for their second meeting of the season after the EFL Cup quarter-final draw pitched Manchester United and Manchester Cityagainst each other at the Old Trafford.

However, that wasn't the only humdinger thrown upby the draw, with Liverpool set to host Tottenham and Chelsea travelling across London for a right old tear-up with West Ham.

The Rest

Paul Gascoigne Makes Surprise Appearance, Score Cheeky Goal In Newcastle Legends Charity Match (Photos & Video)

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Paul Gascoigne made a surprise appearance in a charity game forSt Oswald's Hospice in Gatesheadat the weekend.

The 50-year-old has been plagued with both mental and physical health issues since retiring from football.

However, lining out for a Newcastle Legends side, the England icon looked in decent shape, and even managed to score a cheeky goal.

Newcastle And Tottenham Legend David Ginola Collapses In South Of France, Tweets He’s Okay From Hospital Bed

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Former Newcastle and Tottenham star David Ginola eased fans' fears with an upbeat Tweet after the hunky French legend collapsed from what was initially reported as a heart attack on Thursday.

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The 49-year-old had beentaking part in a celebrity golf tournament in Mandelieu when he is reported to have collapsed.