sky sports

Gobbing Off: Jamie Carragher Suspended By Sky Sports Until End Of The Season

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Jamie Carragher has been suspended by Sky Sports until the end of the season for producing a near-inhuman amount of spittle during a road rage incident at the weekend.

Carragher was filmed spitting at a Manchester United fanand his teenage daughter (after being antagonised) following United's win over Liverpool on Saturday.

Spitting Game: Sky Sports Drop Jamie Carragher From Monday Night Football But Only As Part Of ‘Pre-Scheduled Break’

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The verdict is in and the sentence has been passed: Jamie Carragher has been removed from Sky Sports' Monday Night Football for at least the next couple of weeks.

This comes after Carragher was filmed spitting at a Manchester United fan and his teenage daughter (after being antagonised) following United's win over Liverpool on Saturday.

Paul Merson, 49, To Come Out Of Retirement And Sign For Welsh Fourth-Tier Side Caerau FC (Pending International Clearance)

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Next up in 'unexpected turn of events' news, it's been announced that Paul Merson is waiting on international clearance to sign for a team who play in the fourth-tier of the Welsh football league.

Now 49, Merson retired from professional football in 2006, but is now on the cusp of reversing that decision to turn out for Caerau FC, who are based in the town of Maestag, near Port Talbot.

Sky Sports Strike New £600m Deal With Football League To Live Stream All Midweek Matches

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Sky Sports have struck a "revolutionary" deal with the Football League that will see them allowed to stream all midweek matches from 2019 until 2024.

The £600million, five-year contract also means that all Championship, League One and League Twoclubs will be able to stream their midweek league fixtures via their own official websites, provided they are not chosen for live broadcast by Sky.


‘Totally Out Of Order’ – Jamie Carragher Apologises After Being Filmed Spitting At Man Utd Fans On Motorway

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Jamie Carragher has apologised after being filmed spitting at a car on the motorwayafter Liverpool's 2-1 defeat at Manchester United on Saturday.

In the footage, Carragher can be seen getting wound-up by the driver of the other car, who repeatedly mentions the scoreline of the aforementioned match.

Classic Moments: Gary Neville Reaches Orgasmic Climax As Fernando Torres Finishes Off Tense Semi, 2012 (Video)

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Whenever Chelsea come up against Barcelona in the Champions League, certain memories come flooding back: Ronaldinho's toe poke par excellence in 2005, Andres Iniesta's stoppage time winner in 2009, an irate Michael Ballack shrieking in a bald Norwegian gentleman's face, Didier Drogba poking his head through a crowd to label everything a "f**king disgrace", etc, etc.

‘The Ready And White Army Are Heading For Exits And You Can’t Blame Them’ – Sunderland Twitter Account Loses Faith Before Black Cats Stage Dramatic Comeback Against Bristol City (Photo)

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Sunderland pulled off a dramatic comeback away to Bristol City on Saturday, with the Black Cats netting three second-half goals to secure a 3-3 draw.

However, after the hosts had gone 3-0 up within the first 40 minutes, Sunderland's Twitter account was as despondent as the away fans who had made the 290 mile trip south.

Swedish TV Analyses Tackle By Steward On Pitch Invader During Crystal Palace’s Draw With Newcastle (Video)

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Crystal Palace's 1-1 draw with Newcastle United on Sunday produced a few sizable talking points on Sunday, with the Eagles awarded an arguably soft penalty in the second-half.

However, Swedish sports channel Viasat were far more interested in an incident involving a wayward fan, who raced onto the pitch during the game, initially supping from a bottle of beer.

Pies Classics: Mark E Smith Reads The Classified Football Results On BBC Final Score, 2005 (Video)

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As you've probably heard, Mark E Smith passed away last night at the age of 60. He had not been well.

For the uninitiated, Smith was the chronically Mancunian, fag ash-throated, perennially shit-faced lead singer of The Fall simultaneously that half-cut, barely lucid bloke in the pub you don't want anywhere near you and a national treasure of sorts.

‘Are We Doing This Right, Man Utd?’ – Motherwell Announce Signing Of Peter Hartley With Cheeky Alexis Sanchez Parody (Video)

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Motherwell have announced the permanent signing of Peter Hartley by indulging in that most popular of social media endeavours, the parody video.

Taking Manchester United's rather overblown piano-led Alexis Sanchez video as their inspiration (or target), Motherwell's media bods have produced a rather decent pastiche.

False Alarm: Incoming Missile Alert Accidentally Sounded During US Coverage Of Tottenham’s Win Over Everton (Video)

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Fans watching MSNBC's live coverage of Tottenham's thronking of Everton momentarily had their hearts in their mouths whenan 'incoming missile' alert was sounded.

As the players milled about on the Wembley pitch, an ominous scrolling banner appeared and issued a civil danger warning to alert viewers that a ballistic missile had triggered the Hawaii Emergency Alert System.

‘It’s Not Fair To Ask Those Kind Of Questions’ – Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain Defends Philippe Coutinho As Interviewer Speculates On Brazilians’ Future (Video)

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Liverpool romped to a 4-0 away victory against Bournemouth on Sunday, with Philippe Coutinho once again producing a superb individual performance which included a magnificent goal.

After the game, the Brazilian, who was strongly linked with a move to Barcelona in the summer, was asked by a reporter 'how desperate' he is to stay at Anfield until at least the summer.

Russian Commentator Quits Live On Air After Seeing Team Denied Two Blatant Penalties In Space Of 60 Seconds (Video)

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Handball in the area? No dice...

Russian commentatorVladimir Nikolsky became so enraged at seeing his team denied not one, but two blatant penalties in quick succession that he was left with no other option but to abandon his post live on air.

Nikolsky was covering the recent second-tier match betweenTekstilshchik Ivanovo andTorpedo Vladimir, the team who employ him as an in-house commentator as part of Russian league broadcasting rules.

Classic Moments: John Motson Gets His Backside Handed To Him By Brian Clough In Prickly BBC Interview, 1979 (Video)

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After 50 years plugging away on the gantry, John Motson has announced he's retiring from his BBC commentary gig at the end of the season.

Now aged 72, Motson has cemented his place as one of the foremost voices in English football lore, with 20 major international tournaments and 29 FA Cup Finals listed on his CV.

BBC Stalwart John Motson To Retire After 50 Years In The Football Commentary Racket

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The BBC have announced that, after half a century behind the microphone, John Motson is retiring from the commentary game at the end of the current season.

Motson reduced his workload when he stopped doing live broadcasts a season or three ago, and will now commentate on 18 further Premier League matches for Match of the Day before calling it quits with the FA Cup Final coverage next May.

Weird Scenes: Romania Coach Christoph Daum Offered Fishing Rod By Journalist In Middle Of Press Conference (Video)

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You'll struggle to find an international coach more fiercely at odds with his national press than Romania boss Christoph Daum.

During a media conference just a couple of months ago, Daum was so enraged at the continued attempts to undermine his position that heflew into an apoplectic rage in which he claimed several times that he a 63-year-old German man was "more Romanian" that the entire Romanian press.

Comedy Classics: Mitchell & Webb’s Timeless Sky Sports Parody Advert – ‘Watch The Football’ (Video)

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As prescient now as it ever was, the following sketch succinctly crystallises what televised football has become an endless, mindless assault of HUGE gladiatorial matches abutted by HUGE honking opinions, regardless of the fact that you're actually sat watching Tony Cascarino stumble his way through Norwich City's goalless draw with Preston.

Turkey: Besiktas Announce Alvaro Negredo Signing With Truly Horrendous Clip (Video)

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We've seen some very slick and rather clever clips this summer announcing new signings, with the likes of AS Roma and Southampton getting all meta on us.

However, in announcing the arrival of Spanish hitman Alvaro Negredo from Valencia, Turkish giants Besiktas produced their own rather 'interesting' take on the genre.

Manchester United

Jose Mourinho Signs Up With Russian Broadcasters RT To Provide Expert Punditry For 2018 World Cup

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Photo: Russia Today

Those of you concerned that the upcoming World Cup might have been a little light on ashen-faced grumbling, fear not Jose Mourinho will be at Russia 2018 after all.

The Manchester United manager has signed on as 'coach' of Russia Today's tournament broadcast 'dream team', meaning he'll be in Moscow to provide insight and analysis for all games covered by Vladimir Putin's channel of choice.

‘The Wrong Image Was Provided To Broadcasters’ – VAR Company Defend Wonky Line Mix-Up During Man Utd’s FA Cup Clash With Huddersfield

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The company behind those incredible wobbly VAR lines broadcast during Manchester United's clash with Huddersfield on Saturday have claimed that the offending graphic was not used to disallow Juan Mata's goal.

Hawkeye have said that a "technical error" had led to the dodgy graphic being provided for the TV broadcasters.

No More Mr Nice Guy: Man Utd Manager Jose Mourinho Has Pop At Certain Journalists For ‘Bullsh*t’ Being Spouted About Paul Pogba

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We couldn't help but notice that Jose Mourinho has been putting on something of a 'Mr Nice Guy' charade for the past few weeks, offering generous compliments to opponents, refusing to be drawn on match officials and the like all with a vaguely unsettling smile on his face.

‘He Will Go Down As A Phenomenal Player, Not Pundit’ – Jose Mourinho Claws At Paul Scholes After Man Utd Legend Dares To Criticise Recent Performances

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We've reached the point in the entirely-predictable Jose Mourinho toxic shock cycle where, under pressure due to waning performances and frayed morale, he starts lashing out with forked tongue and anybody who dares criticise him in public.

Manchester United were nothing short of bereft during the goalless first half of their 2-0 win over Everton on New Year's Day, with many exasperated onlookers drawing parallels with the plodding, regimented, unimaginative football that came to exemplify Louis van Gaal's tenure at Old Trafford.

Chronic Case Of The Anichebes: Daley Blind Drops Instagram Clanger By Failing To Observe Proper Copy+Paste Etiquette (Photo)

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Daley Blind has become the latest footballer to come a cropper while copy+pasting generic commercial platitudes on his social media accounts.

The Dutch defender shared a photo of himself posing wistfully in Manchester United's new third shirt on Instagram, along with a caption that he failed to fully edit before publishing.

FAIL: The Irish Herald Newspaper Accidentally Use Photo Of Stormzy In Article About Romelu Lukaku

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TheIrish Herald newspaper have dropped an absolute whopper in their Monday morning edition.

Indeed, the rather glaring cock-up saw the Herald accompany their big back page story about Romelu Lukaku with an image of London grime star Stormzy...

Photo: @Football_LDN/Twitter

Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear.


FAIL: Antoine Griezmann Posts Pathetic Fancy Dress Blackface Photo On Instagram

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Antoine Griezmann scored a massive own-goal on social media on Sunday, after the French striker posted a picture of himself before a fancy dress party, 'blacked-up' as an NBA basketball player.

The Atletico Madrid star posted the photo on Instagram, with the caption '80s party", along with a basketball and laughing emoji.

Le Cringe: French Journalist Tricked By Spoof Report That Bordeaux Have Signed Younger Brother Of Brazilian Winger Malcom, Named ‘Douwi’

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Bordeaux winger Malcom is currently enjoying something of a breakout season in Ligue 1 this year, having already contributed three goals and four assists in the space of just seven appearances so far.

As such, it's perhaps only natural that Bordeaux might think to scour the20-year-old Brazilian winger's family tree in search of more as-yet unearthed footballing gems.

Lukas Podolski Threatens To Sue Breitbart After Far-Right Website Use Photo Of Striker To Accompany ‘Human Trafficking’ Article

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Lukas Podolski is reportedly considering legal action after American right-wing website Breitbart used his image to illustrate an article about human trafficking.

The image actually appeared in a story published by Breitbart's UK arm about a crackdown on trafficking gang that are supposedly using jet-skis to illegally transport migrants from Morocco to Spain.


On This Day In 1999: Liverpool Attempt To Sign Didier Baptiste, Fictional Character From Sky One’s ‘Dream Team’, For £3.5m

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Dream Team: Harchester United's entirely made-up squad (Photo: Sky One)

Every year, the 24th November marks a truly momentous anniversary in the cavernous annals of footballing stupidity: The day Liverpool attempted to sign Didier Baptiste, an entirely fictional player, for £3.5million.

To be clear, the gaffe wasn't made by Liverpool themselves, but by The News of the World newspaper, who erroneously peddled a rumour that the Reds were interested in signing the promising left-back a "French Under-21 international" no less from Monaco.

PSG Tease ‘Grand Announcement’ And Troll Thousands Of Their Own Fans Over Imminent Kylian Mbappe Transfer

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Continuing on the quest to become the biggest yuppie trolls in world football, PSG have trolled thousands of their own fans over the imminent arrival of one Kylian Mbappe.

With a convoluted, FFP-defying £166million 'loan' move for Mbappe now reported to be on the verge of completion, the Parisians roped in a willing accomplice in the guise of right-back Thomas Meunier to break news of a 'grand announcement' being made by his club on Twitter at 12:30pm on Monday.


‘Arsenal Need To Drop Their Two Best Players’ – Charlie Nicholas Hatches Infallible Plan To Beat Tottenham By Binning Off Ozil And ‘Sulky’ Sanchez

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After finishing beneath Tottenham for the first time in Arsene Wenger's 21-year reign last season, many Arsenal fans are a little angst-ridden heading into the first North London derby of the season this Saturday.

Thankfully, ex-Gunner and noted tactical shaman Charlie Nicholas has spent all of two minutes concocting a foolproof dossier for Wenger to help quash Mauricio Pochettino's side at the Emirates.

‘He Reminds Me Of A Toilet’ – Garth Crooks Reserves Special Praise For Sead Kolasinac As Part Of ‘Team Of The Week’ Selection

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It's Monday morning, which can only mean one thing: Garth Crooks has delivered his weekly selection of 'XI players who scored at the weekend' known alternatively as his 'Team of the Week' for BBC Sport.

Oddly, Crooks has opted to pick a non-scoring player or two this time round, with Sead Kolasinac finding his way into the line-up following a sturdy outing in Arsenal's stoic 0-0 draw against Chelsea on Sunday.

Media maelstrom inspires Arsenal fans

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We have just witnessed the biggest "much ado about nothing" period in the history of the Arsenal Football Club. It was ably driven by the usual culprits, the Arsenal hating Media, the fans (those that believe the nonsense they read) and, of course, the "expert pundits" who fuel the fires of discontent.


‘I Cannot Accept This’ – Liverpool Defender Dejan Lovren Sent Idiotic Death Threat Over Instagram

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Liverpool defender Dejan Lovren has revealed that he has received a death threat against his family on Instagram.

Lovren has been heavily maligned for some abject performances of late, with ire reaching a pitch when the Croatian centre-half was hooked off after just 31 hopeless minutes in the Reds' 4-1 defeat against Tottenham a couple of weekends ago.

Magnanimous: Instagram Clanger Sees Man City Defender John Stones Congratulate Chelsea On Beating Stoke (Photo)

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John Stones has offered us yet another peek behind the curtain into the murky backwaters of footballer's PR company-run social media accounts thanks to a ricket dropped on Instagram on Saturday evening.

Despite playing his part in Man City's effervescent 5-0 win over Crystal Palace, Stones felt the need to congratulate his teammates for Chelsea's 4-0 win over Stoke.

World Cup

England Under-17s Win World Cup In Sparkling Style, Danny Murphy Still Finds Something To Moan About

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England Under-17s won a World Cup recently by coming from two goals down to whup Spain 5-2 in the final, but you might've known that good old Danny Murphy would still be able to sap all the joy and ebullience out of everything.

An ex-England international himself, Murphy was thoroughly disheartened to see the Under-17 squad decide to reverse their shirts while collecting their winners' medals, thus obscuring the Three Lions crest.

‘El Mundial! El Mundial!’ – Commentator Goes Ballistic As Costa Rica Qualify For World Cup With 95th-Minute Equaliser (Video)

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Costa Rica snaffled themselves a place at the 2018 World Cup on Saturday night, taking the point they needed against Honduras too reach 'El Mundial' with a game to spare.

However, having gone 0-1 down in the 66th minute, it took until the fifth minute of stoppage time for Los Ticos to snatch a dramatic equaliser through Kendall Waston.

The Rest

End Of An Era: John Motson To Provide Final Live BBC Commentary This Weekend

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And so, all that is will eventually come to pass. This coming weekend, John Motson will deliver his final live BBC commentary.

Motson's first ever BBC broadcast was radio commentary for a match between Everton and Derby County in 1969.

Almost 50 years, 10 World Cups, 10 European Championships and 29 FA Cup Finals later, the 72-year-old will conclude his live work this Sunday whenArsenal welcome Watford to the Emirates for the early kick-off.

RIP Jimmy Armfield – Blackpool, England Legend And Everybody’s Favourite BBC Radio Co-Commentator Passes Away, Aged 82

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Sad news has broken this morning that Jimmy Armfield has passed away today at the age of 82. He had been fighting cancer for many years.

One of the great one-club players, Armfield spent all 17 years of his professional career at Blackpool, turning out on no less than 627 occasions for the Seasiders a record unlikely to ever be surpassed.

Barcelona ‘Announce Signing Of Angel Di Maria’ After Twitter Account Hacked Overnight

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Just for one hot, sticky moment, it looked like Barcelona had retaliated to PSG's recent hostile pinching of Neymar by snaffling one of their main attacking talents in return.

Indeed, quite out of the blue, fans were shocked to see Barca reveal the signing of Angel Di Maria via their official Twitter account of Tuesday night.

‘One Great Enemy We Must All Endeavour To Fear Not Conquering Is Fear’ – Bray Wanderers Chairman Releases Greatest Club Statement Of All Time

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Carlisle Grounds, home to Bray Wanderers

After it looked touch and go for a while, Bray Wanderers have today proudly announced that that club is financially stable for the time being.

The cash-strapped League of Ireland side had drawn up plans to redevelop their old Carlisle Ground home and use the proceeds to build themselves a new stadium, as well as a top notch football academy facility they insist will "rival the best in the world".