Chelsea score a vital three points away to Newcastle in a match that was, well, fucking insane. I mean, Salomon Kalou played clearly at the suggestion of Devin and even contrived to score the pivotal second. Yes, it was that bizarre of a day.

Old Man Winter

Um, yeah.

Chelsea win a match. The NBA lockout comes to an end. Could this day get much better?

Happy days

I guess if you had thrown in a goal or three from the mercurial Fernando Torres then, yes, it could have been better. But, really, that's just being greedy.

No photos. No insightful commentary. Just a damn poll.

What I will say is that, after attempting to keep my cool over the past month, I'm now on suicide watch. This is a crisis, both of confidence and performance. I cannot wait to see what Andre Villas-Boas has to say after today's turgid performance.

Photo: Paul Rudderow

After every Union match, The Philly Soccer Page publishes its exclusive player ratings. Moments later, our wonderful readers follow up with expansive debate.

With the expansion draft looming, let's see if the PSP's ratings can predict who the Union will and should protect.

#teryakiformotm English football's most traditional competition is leaping into the 21st century by introducing an interactive poll to pick the man of the match. Facebook and smart-phone users will be able to select the man of the match award at every FA Cup match this season and OTP spots trouble ahead.

They say a picture is worth a 1,000 words. Case in point:

Road warrior

Battered, bloodied, and fairly rubbish. No matter. Chelsea still manage to hold on for a much-needed win at Ewood Park, 1-0, over a Blackburn Rovers side that probably deserved a point.

What the hell?

What the hell.

Winless in three! A wretched second half in Belgium follows our absolutel capitulation after halftime against Arsenal. Cue the crisis talk, my friends.

A decent enough first half ravaged with wastefulness gives way to a phoned-in final 45 minutes that cost us the points in Belgium.

Has our annual November slump started early again?

Did our defense even come out of the locker room? What was going on? Arsenal's defense were a shambles as well but at least they seemed to get it together a bit after the half. We got worse. Not used to playing with eleven on the pitch anymore?

Chelsea don't like to do things the easy way. Our boys want to make your heart stop and leave you hanging on the edge of your seat until the very end.

Was anybody even able to watch this match, apart from those at Goodison? I'm currently watching the rerun on Chelsea TV.

Well that was interesting. David Luiz, as I predicted before the match, gives away a penalty, then two red cards and a ridiculously inconsistent display of refereeing. Have your vote for man of the match while your rage simmers. You'll find it an easy choice.

Sidenote: Fantastic display from our nine men during the second half.

Anyone looking to discuss the fallacies of the Champions League group stage needn't look any further than Stamford Bridge on Wednesday night.

Reborn

One could also look toward Arsenal's trip to Marseille a truly wretched match I was forced to freelance for evidence of the problems with the CL group stage, but that's a discussion for another blog.

Three goals, a worrying injury to Ramires, further inability to keep a clean sheet, and three points.

Nevertheless, three well-taken points from a fixture that we've had immense difficulty with in recent seasons. I'm pleased, but getting more and more frustrated with the goals we keep conceding.

Frank Lampard, past-it to some, bags his third Premier League hat-trick.

With so much scrutiny on Frank Lampard by the media, our vice-captain proved he's still got it by bagging three goals against Bolton. Daniel Sturridge also made his mark against the team who truly helped him improve last season, almost getting his own hat-trick.

Super Frank Lampard sends a message to his critics. Salomon Kalou, well. No comment.

Redemption song?

If some weird time-traveler type had given me the option of collecting a point at the Mestalla prior to this fixture taking place, I would have gladly taken it.

Fernando Torres loses his fucking mind. Chelsea, meanwhile, don't miss a beat.

God dammit, Fernando

The Chels slash four past Swansea at the Bridge despite playing with ten men for the better part of 50 minutes. It was pretty much an excellent performance aside from the wretchedness that was Torres' fist-half, studs-up lunge on Mark Gower at midfield.

Give the kids some credit.

A recap will be coming shortly, after a quite stress-inducing match that ended in a surprising Chelsea penalty shoot-out win!

Have a vote on your man of the match:

What a ridiculous match.

Is it possible for a match to be so frustrating and anger-inducing, yet also encouraging? The inability to finish still fills me with rage, and that Torres miss. I just... I can't even. Speechless.

I could whine about the fact that two of their goals were offside so it should have been a 1-1 draw, but it also could have been 2-1 to us if Ramires and Torres had scored, and it could have been different if Rooney hadn't missed the penalty, so it's futile for me to complain right now.

Credit where it's due, says Bob.

I unfortunately didn't see the match. What I'm hearing, though, is that, while we're still not at our barnstorming best, we are continuing to evolve as a footballing side. Excellent news.

Fernando Torres puts the mistranslation, and subsequent controversy, behind him with a solid display.

Fernando Torres is not included in this poll. Not even for a laugh.

Probably our best performance so far this season, obviously greatly helped by the performances of Juan Mata and Raul Meireles. I started shouting at the TV when Mata was subbed off keep the man on!

An unconvincing Chelsea see off a game Norwich City side at Stamford Bridge. A needed win, but one potentially overshadowed by the condition of Didier Drogba.

Get well soon

The struggle continues. Aside from an impressive start to both halves, and a late spark provided by a pair of new signings, Chelsea were pedestrian.

Not the most inspiring display, but we managed to come from a goal down to beat a stubborn West Brom side. But who was your man of the match?

It was an absolutely dire first half. The second half was better but our inability to finish is still alarming. Fortunately we got the goals we needed to snag the three points.

As Liverpool ran out 2-0 winners at The Emitrates Stadium to temporarily sit at the top of the Premier League, it was Enrique's performance at left back that saw him named Man of the Match by the Sky team ahead of Arsenal's impressiveThomas Vermaelen.

But do you agree?

Take part in our poll below and let us know your own Man of the Match in a Liverpool shirt today.

Chelsea begin the Andre Villas-Boas era with a goalless draw on a not cold non-night at the Britannia Stadium. Well-earned, but there could have been much more. Still, I, for one, am not going to complain.

You be the judge

So we start the season with a point.

It took two defenders to get our goals today, and two set pieces to become undone again. Disappointment.

A really, truly lackluster performance for the fans considering it was the last home match of the season. Torres still looks lost. Benayoun was anonymous. The play was slow and unexciting.

Well. That was a major bummer. Jack is busy putting his burning anger into words for the recap, so here's the man of the match poll.

Let's face it. At the beginning of March, none of us could even dream about being in this position. And, even if we had won, we would still need to beat Everton on the last day of the season.

He comes from the Ivory Coast - Kalou, Kalou

Fortune favors the brave Brave John Terry that is.

Look, we were gifted a pair of goals. No question. Andre Marriner is, yes, inept.

But at least we showed up. We fought. Clawed and scratched in our pursuit for that result.

El Niño strikes at Stamford Bridge. And that was before Chelsea's No. 9 blew the lid off the place.

Kisses.

What a damn day in West London.

I was forced to miss today's festivities because of this thing called a full-time job. You know, fuck work.

The fight.

I haven't gotten a chance to see the match yet was stuck blogging Spurs for The Score but it looks as if we kind of cruised to the points. Good, not great, news.

Better news? We're up to second on goal difference thanks to another Arsenal capitulation.

Thinking of starting a petition to retain The Mighty One until he can longer walk. Who's in?

Solid, albeit unspectacular, display at The Hawthorns.

Several positives, including the forward movement and our passing best we've looked in that department in weeks.

Not exactly the boost my fragile state needed ahead of Tuesday.

Together again

Meh.

I'd say that just about sums up Saturday afternoon at the Bridge. It was another labored performance, salvaged somewhat by the industry of Didier Drogba, the return of both Alex and Yossi and Flo's first goal for two-plus months.

Disturbingly inept on a night when Chelsea needed a renaissance. Now, only a performance for the ages will do.

I felt myself resigned to this result as soon as Jose Bosingwa misjudged the diagonal pass that freed Ryan Giggs, and led to another dagger from Wayne Rooney.

Yeah, about those nine wins.

Not the best of days

Were we ever really in a position to retain our Premier League title? Unlikely.

Nevertheless, this one stings if not for the result, the second-half performance. On the ascendancy for much of the opening half, and even at the start of the second, we pretty much flailed following Carlo's double switch.

Do we really even need a poll? Man of the Match seems pretty unanimous from my point of view.

But a poll we shall have! Because we need to give Ramires a chance to get some recognition as well. And EBJT who put in another massive performance. Who else do you think deserves some credit from the match today?

A lot of these type of faces at the Bridge tonight.

Dull, yes. Effective? Certainly.

Most significantly, beyond the profligacy and the lack of home atmosphere, is qualification for the Champions League quarterfinals. We're into the last eight, my friends. Celebrate that fact.

More hugging. We need it.

It wasn't exactly impressive. We were in and out of it constantly. Sloppiness, numerous lulls, a general lack of cohesion. Add to that several stretches in which Blackpool hemmed us back with plenty of industry just lacking the skill and we can count ourselves somewhat lucky to have left Bloomfield with three valuable points.

Untracked courtesy of a sometimes impressive, mostly comfortable, 2-0 win in Denmark to open the knockout stages of the Champions League. Nicolas Anelka say fuck penalties.

Manning up.

Better. Not quite there yet, but much, much better.

"It's been difficult in this run.

I'm not sure it can get any worse at the moment.

Good call.

Shit. Fuck. Ass. And any other expletive you can think of.

Three consecutive FA Cups? Forget it. The end of this special run brings special thanks. First to the players for failing to spark off again.

Hey, at least this kid looks like a bargain, right? Right?

Bob.

More disappointment at Craven Cottage as Chelsea fail to breakdown a resolute Fulham side in somewhat drab 0-0 fare on Valentine's Day evening. Well, drab up until added time.

That's when Petr Cech saved our collective blushes, denying Clint Dempsey from the spot after Mike Dean more inept than our play on this day awarded the hosts an ultra-late penalty for the slightest of nicks on Deuce from David Luiz.

Out-thought.

Man of the match? I think not.

This has been about as disappointing a day as I can remember. Not that it wasn't entirely unforeseen. Isn't this just like Chelsea Football Club? You have to love it.

Ah well, enough talk of consecutive league crowns.

The Blues fought back from 1-0 down in a thrilling end-to-end match at the Stadium of Light. Four separate goalscorers but is one of them your pick for man of the match?

I don't think my heart has stopped racing yet. Disaster averted thanks to an excellent penalty from Frank Lampard and goals from Kalou, Terry and Anelka.