Here's a depressing statistics for Chelsea fans: based on his strike rate with the Blues, it would take Fernando Torres around 20 years to score 100 goals. Potential transfer target Neymar, on the other hand, yesterday completed a career century on his 20th birthday, five games into his fourth top-flight season.

The Last Post
This will be the last post on European Football Weekends. But hey, don't be shedding any tears - it's been a thunderously good ride. At the start of 2012 I decided to take a little break from EFW, and see how things panned out. I've enjoyed that freedom so much that it now feels right to hang up the old keyboard.

So Bob Bradley calls:

"Sigi, I was reading your blog and saw your thing, whatever that thing was on Run of Play, was that even a thing? About being a woman without women, and I'm like really? You're such a douche."

"Really? I just think they should write about women's soccer more. Some.

Excuse me while I cough up an organ, momentarily- I've just made the dreadful mistake of going on a post-New Year jog in weather I can only describe as ‘a bit blustery'. If I don't crumple onto the keyboard before the day's out it'll be a minor miracleeeeeeeeertttttttttttttyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyhjjj.

It's Boxing Day in the United Kingdom. My gift to the loyal, hardy, salt-of-the-earth readers of this little blog? A picture of Mario Balotelli. Think that should suffice, considering it's a holiday period and I really don't feel like sitting in front of my keyboard and trying to form sentences or come up with lame, strained egg nog jokes.

Mou are ya? Jose Mourinho has got one-up on Barcelona in the build-up to the forthcoming El Clasico. A digital traffic sign warning of restrictions around Barcelona's ground referred to the stadium as the 'Mou Camp' rather than the Nou Camp. You would expect that a fit-fingered Spanish civil servant has merely pounded the wrong [.

From pipe-dreams in his room in Salto, to a leading role in Liverpool's future: the rise of Luis Suarez has been a meteoric one. Craig Richie puts fingers to keyboard to sing his praises... Hailing from Uruguay's second city, Salto, Luis Suarez could have ended up as just another face in the crowd amongst the [.

Why it's the anti-McCarthy keyboard warriors who don't know what they're doing

Mick McCarthy has been strong, courageous and outspoken this week. We're not talking about being up for a fight with opponents, scrapping against relegation or battling to climb the league.

Wait if you like mate. But it could be quite a while.. Greg's back with tears of joy filling his eyes and running down his cheeks onto his keyboard. As he says this makes it very difficult to type but not one to shirk his responsibilities here are his reflections on recent events including the possible return of David Pleat for the fifth time, now as a scout.

Pretty much everything's underway or will be shortly on the international front, so a reminder that you can find links to streams in the matchday thread, along with news about Liverpool's squad members in action. Should be a relatively interesting day for those involved, or at least as interesting as international break can be, as almost all in Europe have a chance to see their country move on.

Listen.

I sat down at the keyboard last night and stared at the screen. Nothing. I just couldn't get jazzed to write a reaction piece. Some of that was because I could copy and paste many of my prior talking points. Some was because the match was pretty dull.

But the main reason was because the result was so infuriatingly predictable.

- Jason Davis
I'm struck today - after my maudlin ramble last night that was mostly down to putting fingers to keyboard at halftime and then changing course mid-stream - by the thing on which so many people are focused after the Americans managed to salvage a draw against Mexico last night in Philadelphia.

If we ran a daily ridiculous rumor across the headlines, this would easily be it.

Can we all agree that if he were to retire right now, Pep would be considered among the all-time greats? Not because he's there yet, but rather his body of work, even with the players at his disposal, is so staggeringly glittering, we'd have no choice but to assume he'd be somewhere up there at the end.

Today is a sad day for United fans, because it's the day that some of them turned on eachother. A brave keyboard warrior from the Stretford End blog went into battle against the RedCafe forum. And lost.

The two have history. Yolkie, the warrior in question, claimed back in October that Jordan Henderson would be signing for United and that Karim Benzema would join him if we could find a buyer for Michael Owen.