Just for Fun
Signs of life have become growingly infrequent. Once an arena filled with joy and optimism, now bogged down in gloom and misery. Over the years a pantheon of greatness has now become a desolate, barren wasteland. Like the fall of Constantinople before it, Manchester was besieged and broken, what was once United is now torn apart.
I awake to the glorious sound of the Lighthouse Family filling the room. Yes! Yes I could be lifted! It's a suitably rock n roll start to a day on which yours truly is the headline act.
Club tie. Lucky Penfold underpants. Freshly pressed slacks. Let's do this!
This is the second in a monthly column that is fast becoming my favourite to write. The first one had mixed reviews with people criticising the language and style in which it was written. Apparently it had too much swearing in it which is odd considering the title of this column is "Cunt of the Month"; I would have thought swearing was an assumption!
Dwight Yorke has demonstrated that he still has the magic touch, when challenged to some keepy-uppy-with-a-twist, by magician and card fiend Damien O'Brien. Yorke joined with fellow former United stars Norman Whiteside and Quinton Fortune, at the recent partypoker Road to Old Trafford tournament.
The former players were wowed by O'Brien's trickery, before being assigned a mission to master some magic of their own.
The In The Stands funny video of the week sees two Corinthians defenders totally screw-up what should have been a straight forward clearance away from goal! The incident occurred during Corinthian's Campeonato Brasileiro clash with rivals Vasco Da Gama. Deep into injury-time and with the scores at one-a-piece, nervous Corinthians defenders tried desperately to secure [.
This ad featuring United for a Kuwaiti mobile telecom company, Viva, uses their national team of 1982, their Golden Generation, who qualified for the World Cup and were in the same group as England, Czechoslovakia and France. They lost two and drew one, including a 3-1 defeat against England, with Bryan Robson scoring two goals.
Ferguson it's Carrick you know from Anton Alfy on Vimeo. "VIDEO: Fergie singing Carrick chant" was originally published at The Republik of Mancunia.
"VIDEO: Kagawa Sings Gangham Style" was originally published at The Republik of Mancunia.
Following City's victory over Sunderland in the League Cup final, Manuel Pellegrini was asked how he felt.
He replied: "Very happy, very happy. I love pressure so I have to manage a big team like Manchester United."
Nobody knows your name...
Manchester United fanclub... based in Merseyside.
The official flask to make drinking official.
The official United magazine... only 50p.
A kit launch in 1988 at Albert Square.
Manchester City's new manager Manuel Pellegrini has spoken to the press today and has showed he is a perfect match for his new club, making it clear he fully appreciates that playing against United is their cup final.
"I know that the most important thing for all the fans is to beat Manchester United and if I am here it is because I am sure we will do it.
All season, Piers Morgan has been giving shit to Robin van Persie after his move from Arsenal to Manchester United. He took to calling him "Van Pursestrings", implying that he was a mercenary. A few months after joining United, Van Persie has shown exactly why he left the club, with him winning the Premier League for the first time and Golden Boot again.
A walk down memory lane...
Three weeks before Robin van Persie signed for Manchester United an article appeared in the Evening News which claimed that fans would be "mad" to believe that the Dutchman would come to Old Trafford and that Van Persie would be even "crazier" to sign for us.
Manchester United face Real Madrid at the 85,454 capacity Santiago BernabÃ©u Stadium tonight the Champions League round of 16.
Whilst this game is a sell out (although won't hit the 85k mark because of fewer seats being made available for European games), it is interesting to note that the Spanish giants do struggle to sell out their ground.
This is the first of a monthly article I will be writing and, thankfully, Scott has given me a complete free reign to do what I want; which may or may not be a good thing for his website. I've decided to use this opportunity to highlight the things that have irritated me, riled me up, rubbed me up the wrong way, made me laugh, made me cry, made me rant, left me speechless and left me incredulous.
Juan Mata, Robin van Persie, Javier Hernandez, Phil Neville, Adnan Januzaj, Rio Ferdinand, Shinji Kagawa and Alexander Buttner posted pictures of themselves with Diego Maradona on their Instagram accounts.
Once you can get over the odd notion of using players from United and Liverpool to advertise their company, you have to give credit to Chevrolet for illustrating the gulf in quality between the two clubs.
Paul Scholes, Robin van Persie, Rio Ferdinand and Ryan Giggs vs Jordan Henderson, Jonjo Shelvey, Joe Allen and Glen Johnson.
Following on from Jonny Evans interviewing Danny Welbeck, our young striker has returned to the favour and asked Evans a few questions.
Danny Welbeck: What has been the main reason behind your good goalscoring record this season?
Jonny Evans: I've tried to get myself in to the box, right in front of the goalkeeper, waiting for any spillages.
Jonny Evans: So, Danny, how pleased were you to get a nomination for PFA Young Player of the Year?
Danny Welbeck: I was obviously pretty pleased to be recognised by your peers as one of the best young players in the league. I don't think I had one of my best seasons but it's something I take in my stride and I'm looking to push on and do better.
"Evans: This summer? I'm marrying you!" was originally published at The Republik of Mancunia.
Manchester City have been accused of betraying their staff after plans to withdraw two free season tickets from salary packages came to light. Workers at the Etihad have traditionally been given the tickets as a token of appreciation for their efforts on top of their salaries but from next season they will have to pay 50% of a regular season ticket price.
Whenever we're given the opportunity to disprove Manchester City's silly claim that the city is theirs, we gladly take it. For City's final game of the season today there were empty seats all over the place, despite the club claiming the game was a sell out.
By the time of the final whistle, when City players took part in the customary lap of honour, the ground was half empty, with the fans that did bother to show up passing up the opportunity to applaud their players for finishing 2nd.
On Manchester City's official YouTube channel, Micah Richards was filmed singing Michael Carrick's chant, "hard to believe it's not Scholes, it's Carrick, you know."
As City boarded the train to London from Stockport, ahead of their game against Chelsea today, Richards unashamedly sang the United chant 4 minutes and 30 seconds in.
Reminisce about Jonjo Shelvey's hissy fit in the away game between United and Liverpool this season.
"Shelvey Deal With It" was originally published at The Republik of Mancunia.
GIF by @OllyRamone
Mats Moller Daehli posted a picture to his Instagram account of his first football game.
On Sky Sport's Monday Night Football, Gary Neville was less than impressed what Jamie Carragher discussed the possibility of Liverpool winning the league.
The Fresh Prince of Burnley
Now this is a story all about how my life got flippin' turned upside down. And I'd like to take a minute just sit right there, I'll tell you how I became the prince of a town called Burnley.
In the Borough of Pendle I was born and raised, on the playground was where I spent most of my days.
Not really news but thought that the picture looked awesome. Lionel Messi in a Real Madrid shirt and Cristiano Ronaldo in a Barcelona kit. Of course it will never happen but it is the sort of thing you only see in Pro Evolution Master League's so do allow yourself and us to dream!
Ahead of their Champions League final against Bayern Munich, Borussia Dortmund have put Ole Gunnar Solskjaer's shirt from the European Cup final in 1999 in to their museum. "PICTURE: Borussia Dortmund's Solskjaer Wind Up" was originally published at The Republik of Mancunia.
"PICTURE: We sign Phil Jones, you sign Kun Aguero" was originally published at The Republik of Mancunia.
In City's penultimate game at the Etihad against West Brom this evening, the blues again made a mockery of their claim that Manchester belongs to them. "The city is still yours..." was originally published at The Republik of Mancunia.
"VIDEO: Welbeck singing United chants when celebrating #20" was originally published at The Republik of Mancunia.
Luis Suarez is unlikely to play for the rest of the season after biting Branislav Ivanovic on Sunday. The horrible little runt, who punched someone in the face when representing his country earlier this month, has been charged by the FA for this latest disgraceful act. This is the second time in the past three years that Suarez has bitten an opponent and was banned for 7 games the last time he did it.
During Crystal Palace's 2-2 draw with Leeds United, Wilfried Zaha stuck his middle finger up at the travelling Leeds fans. "PICTURE: Zaha Hates Leeds Scum" was originally published at The Republik of Mancunia.
Here are some interesting football facts (including fun Premier League and FA Cup stats to throw around before this weekend's set of games). My personal favourite is the one about English managers it may only be in the 'Premier League' era but after 20+ years it's not a trend, it's a problem. Until 1882 [.
A Manchester-based artist, Michael Browne, has presented this ambitious painting of United players past and present to pay tribute to their dominance of the English game over recent years.
The painting can be found at the National Football Museum (in the Urbis building in town).
Browne is behind the famous The Art of the Game painting which features Cantona and is already displayed at the museum.
"Happy Christmas!" was originally published at The Republik of Mancunia.