Ah hell. Not this shit again.

Oh joy. We've reached that special day of days in which insanity and panic trumps all. Well, you know, perhaps it's money that trumps all. Yeah, it's the cake.

This is January transfer deadline day. A war amongst men. Not really, but you know what I'm getting at.

With Liverpool set to face Wolves on transfer deadline day, there was always some worry on our end as to how we'd manage to fit in both match coverage and any last-minute transfer insanity. Turns out that the club and Kenny Dalglish were fully sympathetic to our concerns, as today the official site put out a brief statement from Dalglish that under no circumstance will any new senior players be brought in before midnight in Paris on Tuesday.

This week's episode dives in to the Euro 2012 draw and a "status quo" weekend across the major domestic leagues in Europe. The further effects of the Elite Player Performance Plan in England reveal themselves and we also discuss Sepp Blatter's 10 worst ideas about football and shake our heads at the insanity of Marian Iancu.

A question of ethics -- can you get mad at your 90-year-old Grandmother for getting you sick on Thanksgiving when you spend 40 minutes in the car with her driving her back to her home?A question of insanity -- can you start snorting the crystals in Thera-Flu packets in Kenny Powers fashion?A question of practicality -- can you try to assemble a weekly EPL preview-o-rama when every three seconds

We don't like to talk about transfer rumours. We especially don't like to talk about transfer rumours between windows. Mostly because none of the information floating around is true, accurate, or otherwise factual. And mostly because it's all crap that's been rehashed using stuff that was floating around six months ago that even back then wasn't true, accurate, or otherwise factual.

The insanity of Arsenal going to Stamford Bridge and beating Chelsea 5-2 may have taken up a solid plurality of Match of the Day yesterday, leaving the runtime a little light when it came to Liverpool versus West Brom and so robbing us of the chance to watch highlights of Charlie Adam trying out his special edition Adidas FlubberZero boots, but for the time being it's the best we've got.

1. In writing this I am acknowledging that yesterday actually happened. We actually lost 6-1 to City at Old Trafford. There aren't many worse days than that for us but even just in recent times, I'd argue the 4-1 against Liverpool and the 2-1 during the Munich 50th anniversary week hurt more. It was the worst day for our manager though, he claimed after the final whistle, so now we have to see what he will do to remedy it.

There is a debate going on on whether the Premier League should scrap relegation and promotion or not. Frankly, i think all those who are proposing the idea are crazy. I tried looking for an appropriate word but the truth is only insanity can define such an idea.

Scrapping relegation would drastically reduce the level of competition in the league not to mention reducing the revenue the league generates every season.

It's been a fun week to follow Liverpool, with the crushing boredom of another international break coming along just as the things were starting to pick up followed by the kind of ridiculous insanity in the press that seems to come along before every United match. And by fun I of course mean absolutely hideously unbearable.

Some good ones in MLS this week. My vote goes to Nizar Khalfan's laser-guided effort. Iran outfit Sepahan's Emad Mohammed's insanity here comes after he megged his defender. There seemed to be some gravity defiance in this shot. Slask Wroclaw's Sebastian Mila imitates the Earth's curvature with a divine free kick.

It would seem the lower reaches of the Argentina domestic pyramid would be the place of choice if one is interested in a football-MMA mashup. This week's offering is no less the all-out insanity than we've seen in recent times, and includes such don't-drop-the-soap-joke inducing moves such as kicking a prone player in the head with a running start.

Of all the insanity from Barca Milan, this might top it all. Just watch and appreciate. There's little else to say. (The very beginning and Thiago Silva's goal comes around the 3:40 mark.)

It's almost like he's building to a Pato climax in the seconds before the opener. And no, you did not need that imagery, but it's on the house.

It's September 9th and you've just wound down from the summer of silly, anxiously anticipating some rumor-free weekdays and some actual, ya know, football.

You're in for a world of hurt: David Beckham is a free agent and his contract runs up at the end of the year.

This won't be pretty.

Deadline day' has arrived, and it doesn't especially matter that Liverpool seems to have largely wrapped up their summer dealings. Because deadline day has arrived. Which means that if you haven't stocked up on bottled water and tins of beans already, you're pretty much out of luck for when the insanity kicks off in a couple of hours and the country grinds to a halt, staring rapt, fixated on Sky Sports' scrolling ticker.

The window closes on Wednesday at midnight in England, and with Liverpool getting the bulk of their incomings sorted well before the season even started there may not be all that much room for the excitement of a last minute acquisition or three. Still, there are a few chunks of remaining deadwood the club would desperately love to be rid of at any cost.

With the new Premier League season about to kick off, a hopeful mood surrounding the club, and a summer full of transfer insanity mostly put to bed, it's hard to believe that less than three months ago the 2010-11 season had only just come to an end. Back then, we did our best to digest all the highs and lows, from Roy Hodgson and Chrisitian Purslow and Joe Cole to Kenny Dalglish and Luis Suarez and Lucas Leiva.

Images: Getty Images/Daylife

Balotelli: Daniele? Can I have a moment?

De Rossi: My time is precious, homie. What is it?

Balo: Well, as a team elder I hold you in high esteem and have long admired your reputation, both on and off the pitch.

There might be a bit of delusion setting in at Porto after their astonishing run under Roman's latest boy toy last year, and it doesn't seem to show any signs of stopping.

Porto prez Pinto da Costa keeps the insanity and inanity coming:

"It may sound like a heresy, but I would not trade Hulk for Cristiano Ronaldo.

Oh, summer. A time for relaxation, the beach, perhaps a concert in the evening. Well, for football fans be sure to add in a bit of insanity. August usually causes a breaking point of irrationality, impatience, and even inferiority complexes as the transfer market comes to a close.

So after playing on the west coast last weekend getting and getting pounded @altitude midweek, the Red Bulls returned home to face the second best team in MLS on Saturday. In the ensuing 90 minutes, the Red Bulls were lucky to get out of Harrison with hard fought 2-2 draw. But nevermind the result.

What is absolutely funny to me is I was talking to Ginge about running an article series about this very thing, and now the Dynamo are making moves it's the right time to really let the DT faithful have some fun for a few minutes (or maybe longer?). Today's particular topic centers around the recent trade (obviously).

Football Links: Barcelona's anti-football, Manchester United's first title-winning manager and more - originally posted on Soccerlens.com

Essential weekend reading while you mull over the insanity of a 400m naming rights deal:

The science of pre-season training courtesy of Premier League club Wolves.

Bet you didn't wake up and think that you'd spend today watching Owen Hargreaves sculpt his lower halves. Or rather you woke up from that, as it was a nightmare.

Well, it's very, very real. Owen will likely get another contract elsewhere local hospital FC or something but in the meantime, he's taken to YouTube with his very own fitness channel.

One of the things that I love about football is the freedom for players to celebrate goals. I think it's ridiculous that removing your shirt is an automatic yellow, but fortunately, the multitude of other celebrations are allowed to occur without the insanity that breaks out during an NFL game when somewhere dares to show a little emotion.

If nature abhors a vacuum, then the transfer window abhors a lack of batshit insane rumours to sell papers and drive hits with. And with many of Liverpool's supposed targets cooling down after the more dubious corners of the intertubes had pushed them for weeks only for it to amount to nothing, a new round of insanity was called for.

And just like that, the transfer insanity ratchets up another couple of notches, as twelve hours after news broke that Liverpool had signed Jordan Henderson it became clear that the other highly regarded Engalnd u21 player making the rumour rounds was heading off to sort his medical and finalise terms with a club.

The list keeps growing, perhaps with everybody thinking that if they keep adding names one's bound to turn out right sooner or later. And so today we've got a few more highly dubious but widely reported rumours to add to the heaping pile of possible transfer targets, as well as one rumour that just about everybody seems to think is going to come true no matter what over the next few days.

Paolo Di Canio has today been confirmed as the new Swindon Town manager. Here's a tribute to him, taken directly from the Sabotage Times.

On the day Paolo Di Canio returns to English football as manager of Swindon Town, we look at the goals, glory and insanity of one of football's cast-iron nutters.

Special 1 TV is back with one of the funniest episodes in quite a while. This one features jokes about the Overlords of Football, Robbie Keane's accuracy hitting the target, Wenger descending into insanity, Osama Bin Laden, Sir Alex winning Man...
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The first ever Be Ugly in Vegas trip was a huge success! We had a fantastic time meeting everyone who came and now it's time to wrap up the insanity that went down during the trip. CSRN MEDIA PLAYER

Be Ugly in Vegas Wrap Up Show: "Richard's Gonna Knock You Out"
Host: Scott Bornstein & Zach Woosley
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The first ever Be Ugly in Vegas trip was a huge success!

When you're masturbating as hard as MLS and it's sad fans were over FSL making it to the CCL final, it's important to remove the plastic bag before you lose consciousness.

Meanwhile, Jason Kreis slips further into insanity:

"Jason creates adversaries in his mind," [FSL President Bill] Manning said.

Dear leagues all around the world,Stop flipping sending off players for "excessive celebration"!!!THIS is not EVER worth ejecting a player:And do not even blame the refs, they are doing what they are told. By who? BY YOU!!Fix this, please. Now. Love,Utterly baffled by the insanity!PS - I will start slapping folks.

Perhaps Luis Fabiano is a not quite Darius Vassell. Perhaps Brazil is a tiny bit football mad. Perhaps Sao Paulo has reason to celebrate.

But "tens of thousands"? For Luis Fabiano? A very, very good player, but he's not quite the creme de la creme of the footballing crop. Not Ronaldinho, not Ronaldo, not really.

Two rather impressive goal milestones in the last week. First it was Francesco Totti hitting 200 Serie A goals for Roma, and now, a bit more impressively, Rogerio Ceni grabbing his century for Sao Paulo.

Two hundred is obviously more than one hundred, but hitting triple digits as a goal keeper?

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Marking 25 Years Today, since QPR's League Cup Semi-Final "Win" (draw) at Anfield
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Throughout the day, updates, comments and perspectives re QPR and football in general are posted and discussed on the QPR Report Messageboard...Also Follow: QPR REPORT ON TWITTER
- During the match, feel free to join in QPR Report Live Chat
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- "Spot The Ball, #3 - The answer!

So, I assume everybody has heard how the loyalists of Stamford Bridge managed to scramble themselves a Torres banner, a small sign of welcome for their new striker, but it ended up little more than a xeroxed copy of the flag that always hung for him at Anfield? Well, if you hadn't, I suppose that now you have.

With barely a whimper, as quietly as a mouse, a football club died today at the High Court in London. It might not matter that much to many people that Windsor & Eton Football Club should have slipped from consciousness today, but it matters to some the couple of hundred or so people that supported them, those that played for them, were amongst the backroom staff and the volunteers that ran the club through well over a century of history, for example.

Several levels of failure.

[The Spoiler]

• Blame it on the post, man. (Fisted Away)
• Crossing the pond. (Left Back In The Changing Room)
• Women and Polish football. (IBWM)
• Pondering the insanity. (The DA)
• Good, sound lesson. (WSC)
• Game over.

Wheeeeee!
Thus ends another "silly season" in European soccer. For us Americans there is hardly an equivalent to the insanity of the rumors, speculation, and maddening amounts of money that are thrown around during the transfer window and particularly the closing days of it. The always brilliant Brian Phillips (of Run of Play fame) wrote for Slate.