Germans in My Bedroom

German Women's National Soccer Team

Creepy Moments for Fast Girls: Germany's Sexpot Soccer Superstud Nadine Kessler

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Just announced! Nadine Kessler wins the "Call Me at Any Time of the Day or Night and Talk to Me With Your Voice-Like-Sex-Dripping-With-German-Language" Fast Girls Award.

For real. Anytime, Nadine. Anytime.

Two More for the List: She's Beautiful and Can Kick Your Head In

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Alex Morgan, having nearly kicked her own head in, maybe.Because it's been a little while, right? And you miss her running around on your television, right? (You should check US Soccer to see the U.S. women's national team "Yay, We Won Something Finally" tour schedule, including a few friendly dates with Germany, which nearly made me pee myself with delight.