So yes, I'm a uniform nerd. I love things like this. And this. When adidas extended its MLS deal through 2018 two years ago, I was silently doing fist pumps. Some aren't fans, but I generally dig their designs and the iconic shoulder stripes, and the uniformity of the number and lettering scheme is right up my alley.

Uh oh, Franck Ribery doesn't look too impressed up there! Let's all pretend that it's a major case of jet lag and Franck's failure to pick up the David Luiz Book Of Hospitality. To be fair, it must be dreadful stuck in a training camp where you're forced to sing Birthday songs to the President, train in the sweltering heat and not get to fist pump on the streets or wherever you'd like!

Newcastle are being linked on this first day of the new year and the fist day of the January transfer with Montpellier defender Mapou Yanga-Mbiwa. Mapou Yanga-Mbiwa Newcastle again linked with French U21 International This is not the first time we've been linked with the 22 year-old France Under-21 defender, so we're not sure [.

Tough to answer. Many people will be upset to see a Mexican goal against the U.S. in a championship as goal of the year and possible best goal ever, but it is what it is. It's controversial to say, but, there is an argument to be made.

Pepe Reina can always be relied upon for a bit of honesty (sometimes too much!) and earlier today, he gave his opinion on who he feels are the best and worst performers during Liverpool's training sessions.
Reina's choices may surprise some fans:
"The best trainer for me is Jay Spearing.

In the waning days of print media, an old sports columnist for a major metropolitan daily shakes his fist limply at soccer to remind readers exactly why they left newspapers behind in the first place. The Los Angeles Times is ...
Visit http://www.majorleaguesoccertalk.com for the rest of the story.

January 20, 2006.

This is the day a fresh-faced (and he remains fresh-faced, and lovely, and the kind of guy my Mammy would love to see me bring home for dinner) Theo Walcott signed for Arsenal from Southampton for a then British record fee for a teenager. SIX YEARS ago, can you believe it's six years ago?

Benvinguda to the Friday Crackovia Club! The loco guys behind the Calatan sketch show have done it once again, with one of their over the top musical numbers! This week, Sergio Ramos sings and dances about Real Madrid midfielder, Di Maria's 'nursing needs' as he collapses to the ground in dramatic fashion during a match no less!

Part 2....Players Celebrating Goals (OTT)
It has been said by many a man that scoring a goal is better than sex. Whether this is actually true I personally am not too sure, but I think that the feeling of scoring a goal is pretty much unparalleled in world sport. And for years, everyone knew that footballers felt this way.

Tim Howard was called upon again. Here, Jai Alai in Miami...

A little quick redress on Saturday's 1-0 USA win over visiting Honduras in Florida. Jurgen Klinsmann's first win as manager as well.

The Rooster deserves a Snickers commercial

The Rooster sticking around.

By Chris Wright

Last night's Johnstones Paint Trophy tie between Accrington Stanley and Tranmere had to be abandoned in the 39th minute when Accrington defender Tom Bender was knocked unconscious after being accidentally twatted in the face by his own goalkeeper Ian Dunbavin as he tried to punch the ball clear of Tranmere striker Lucas Akins, who inadvertently nudged Bender into the path of Dunbavin's flying fist.

It's only Day 2 of the Selecao Bootcamp and so much has gone down! Man United's Fabio who declared once that he'd prefer to play for Portugal ("Oh no he DI'INT!") went through the traditional 'Baptism Brasileira' process which involves standing on a chair and telling the whole room why you're proud to play for Brazil.

Europa League or Carling Cup, which ought we to want less? It's a tricky one. The Europa League trophy is a sizeable beast, and its lack of handles gives it a pleasingly Neanderthalic edge – one cannot help but handle it in rough, uncouth manner when raising it aloft, which is rather apt after 90 minutes of blood and thunder.

By Chris Wright

Even woken up and though: 'I wonder what it would sound and look like if Paul McGrath sung a tone-deaf version of the Byrds/Carole King classic 'Goin' Back' on a gloomy-looking beach in Curracloe'? well today, my friend, is your lucky day.

And I use the word 'lucky' quite wrongly.

Two goals by Diego Forlan and another from Luis Suarez helped Uruguay win the Copa America for a record 15th time as they beat Paraguay 3-0.

Suarez gave Uruguay the lead in a match it dominated in the opening minutes. Receiving a pass in the area, the Liverpool forward beat defender Dario Veron to score from a deflected left-footed shot that went in off the far post behind ‘keeper Justo Villar.

Image source: Alvaro Abeloa's Facebook page.

If we've learned anything from our years of covering 'ballers in pre-season training, is that they usually provide the randomly sexually suggestive activities for our viewing pleasure. While training in Los Angeles, the staff of Real Madrid have ever so nicely fulfilled one of our requests* to have the lads strip down and hosed off, cleverly disguising their rouse as water polo.

Enough between-the-legs moves, ankle-breaking and fist-pumping to fill an entire season of Jersey Shore.

Over the last couple days I've been seeing a few articles from news sources not particularly knowledgeable in soccer or the Portland Timbers and Seattle Sounders come out with an almost surprised reaction to the relative calm between the fans during last Sunday's game. That's not to say we were calm.

The list keeps growing, perhaps with everybody thinking that if they keep adding names one's bound to turn out right sooner or later. And so today we've got a few more highly dubious but widely reported rumours to add to the heaping pile of possible transfer targets, as well as one rumour that just about everybody seems to think is going to come true no matter what over the next few days.

Apparently Viva La Vida wasn't a one-off and it looks like Brian Eno is now 100% down with producing songs whose potential for fist pump-house remixes is as high as his fee for going into the studio. I do enjoy upbeat, happy people music but I think Eno's best when he or the artist he's producing is being all maudlin, moody and mildy experimental.

We were here a year ago for the same fixture and for the same reason the first division play-offs. Last year they met in the final rather than the semi, and both sides were going for promotion. Cowden won it then, achieveing their second successive promotion despite a backdrop of off-field problems which resulted in further budget cuts this year.

Double entendre? Mais oui. For a while there it looked like Hamid wanted to gobble up everything in his box, even in unadvisable circumstances. It only seemed like a matter of time before he got lobbed or didn't fist one away far enough and got punished.
But that that never happened.

Double entendre? Mais oui. For a while there it looked like Hamid wanted to gobble up everything in his box, even in unadvisable circumstances. It only seemed like a matter of time before he got lobbed or didn't fist one away far enough and got punished.

But that that never happened.

Having drunk from the soothing elixir of victory (and Guinness) this weekend, the Gooner nation feels like a slightly lighter, breezier place this week. Facial muscles have relaxed, fists have unfurled themselves and the grey matter feels as though it has been lubricated. A bit like that feeling you get when you've had exactly 2 pints in the afternoon.

Newcastle United head off to Anfield in the hope of doing the double over a resurgent Liverpool. Let's face it, it's going to be hard work to take points off Liverpool as, under Dalglish, they're making a good fist of pushing for European qualification. Realistically, a top 4 finish is beyond them but they could [.

I've put the photos from this weekend into a separate post. First up, the game versus NJPC:

Stefani Miglioranzi and Sebastien LeToux during warmup.

Our little hero.

Justin Mapp warms up.

SOB TIFO display at Red Bull game.

Theirry Henry at PPL Park.

In a recent U20 match down in South America, a Chile's Bryan Carrasco grabbed the arm of a player for Ecuador and pulled that player's fist into his own face. Carrasco's trick work, drawing a foul on the Ecuadorian, but Ecuador won the match 1-0.

Hold the damn phone, Chelsea isn't dead yet. Two precious away goals in the Danish capital help extinguish nightmarish memories of the weekend, and perhaps signal a way forward for our embattled leader.

Thing are looking up?

Alluding to later visual awesomeness, may we all now join in a collective fist pump following this much-needed win?

Is it this?

Certainly up there. Assault on the ref has to be admired, Di Canio, take a bow. But is that better than assault on a paramedic? Andre Bikey everyone:

I'd argue both pale into comparison with assault on a fan. Look how collected Cantona seems before he launches himself into Matthew Simmonds.

Champions League match between Arsenal and Barcelona on February 16, 2011.

This is Arsenal's fist win over Barcelona.

See the full highlights:
Arsenal 2-1 Barcelona

It's an exhibition of athletic prowess, not a ruddy peep show, y'know. (Getty Images/Daylife)

Usually we restrict ourselves to the cheery world of players and their associates when dishing out the Fail Files. But having seen this photo of Jermaine Defoe and elite British heptathlete Jessica Ennis promoting the new adiZero footwear range in London yesterday, we simply could not contain ourselves.

I am back in the States less than 24 hours and my MYSQL database melts, conveniently after I had just completed a massive tome on Mario Balotelli. Yes, that Mario Balotelli. The tech support stinks, I have to restart WP all over again, and apparently I am supposed to "back things up." But where I come from, "backing things up" involves certain dance moves that are NSFW and would probably burn your eyes.

I am back in the States less than 24 hours and my MYSQL database melts, conveniently after I had just completed a massive tome on Mario Balotelli. Yes, that Mario Balotelli. The tech support stinks, I have to restart WP all over again, and apparently I am supposed to "back things up." But where I come from, "backing things up" involves certain dance moves that are NSFW and would probably burn your eyes.

By Saheli RC, writing from Singapore

In Spain there is a curious tradition that this writer cannot wrap her head around: whenever there is a dispute between two parties, it usually ends with one of them threatening to bring the other to court. Whether the argument eventually devolves into a messy court affair remains uncertain, but it is the metaphorical ‘putting a fist down by threatening with a court date' that counts.