By Alan Duffy
With the Zambian players and coaching staff still celebrating their surprise African Cup of
Nations victory in a hugely dramatic penalty shoot-out in Libreville, Wayne Rooney decided to
provide us all with a fine example of the unsporting, unpleasant and ungracious.
By Chris Wright
Seems like this problem may run a little deeper than we first thought...
The kid's a disgrace, a DISGRACE I tells ye!
Video: 101GG
By Chris Wright
So, it was Luis Suarez who refused Patrice Evra's offer of a handshake at Old
Trafford earlier this afternoon...
The mascot is seen here at the exact moment he realises he's not the most immature man on
the pitch
Evra grabbed Suarez, then Rio Ferdinand also refused to shake his hand.
By Chris Wright
In which, during Borussia Monchengladbach's DFB Pokal quarter-final tie with Hertha Berlin on
Wednesday night, Monchengladbach striker Igor De Camargo goes down like a big cheating sack of
spuds to get Hertha centre-half Roman Hubnik sent off...
Is he alright?
By Chris Wright
'The Hart Fart' appears to be a phenomenon that most Man City fans are aware of already, being
as though their official in-house television channel has already produced an in-depth analysis
package to accompany the video.
For the unenlightened, the clip is taken from City's 2011 blooper reel and sees Joe Hart letting
go of a little bum toot in the back of a taxi, with captain Vincent Kompany trying desperately to
keep a straight face in order to admonish young Joseph and his rogue sphincter, while Micah
Richards just explodes in fits of howling laughter.
By Alan Duffy
Who Ate All The Pies indeed...
A fine striker in his time, and a winner of four Scudettos with Internazionale, Adriano Leite
Ribeiro was always dazzled by the bright lights of the big city. Indeed, if it wasn't for his
penchant for partying, he could have gone on to become one of his country finest exports of recent
times.
By Chris Wright
It's been a heavy old day so far, what with the situation at the top of the England tree and
everything, so here's the perfect antidote a truly pathetic own-goal to watch, savour and
enjoy.
The guilty party is one Ashraf Soliman of Israeli club Maccabi Umm al-Fahm who, with his side
2-1 up in the 89th minute of an domestic cup tie against Hapoel Afula, panicked under pressure and
duly farted a dreadful poke past his own keeper to level the score at two apiece.
By Chris Wright
As you no doubt remember, former Italy battering ram Christian Vieri is appearing on the
Italian version of 'Strictly Come Dancing With The Stars On Ice-Factor' at the
moment with his latest routine, a Brazilian Capoeira (a dance based on a strain of martial arts,
made famous by Tekken's Eddie Gordo), showcasing all the grace and mobility he displayed on the
football pitch during his last few years as a pro, i.
By Chris Wright
In which the majestic, graceful, honest and British Gareth Bale is unfortunate enough to run
headlong through a hotspot of intensely strong gravity caused by solar flares reflecting off the
twin moons of Tatooine at Anfield on Monday night.
Poor Gareth.
By Alan Duffy
Gary Lineker may himself exude a certain charm-free smugness but next to the high king of smug
gobshitery that is Piers Morgan, the Match Of The Day host is a crisp-promoting little sweetie
bum.
Morgan took on Lineker on Twitter today, as he continues to cultivate his contrived "Mr Nasty"
image.
By Chris Wright
After serving his eight-game ban for being a devious little shit to the Nth degree, Luis Suarez
returned for Liverpool last night and duly picked up where he left off giving Scott Parker a sly
kick in the ribs.
He's obviously spent the eight games dutifully reassessing his conduct, mulling over lessons
learnt and bettering himself as a person.
By Chris Wright
After serving his eight-game ban for being a devious little shit to the Nth degree, Luis Suarez
returned for Liverpool last night and duly picked up where he left off giving Scott Parker a sly
kick in the ribs.
He's obviously spent the eight games dutifully reassessing his conduct, mulling over lessons
learnt and bettering himself as a person.
By Chris Wright
In which, an hour or so into Milan's slumber-inducing goalless draw with Napoli yesterday,
Almighty Zlatan provides the game's sole 'highlight' by unfurling an arm around Antonio Nocerino's
shoulder in order to expertly disguise an elaborate 'round the houses' slap to Salvatore Aronica's
face.
By Chris Wright
Much like the first-string's executive decision to stop playing after 45 minutes, it seems like
the Chelsea media bods also forgot to bring their 'A' game at the Bridge yesterday...
I distinctly hope that someone in the club's marketing department was flogged with barbed wire
until the first light of dawn for this grave dereliction of duty.
By Chris Wright
Je suis bostin' for a slash
It's pretty damn parky over in France at the moment, with freezing temperatures (we're talking
-13ºC in places) threatening to disrupt the weekend's football fixtures not that Saint-Etienne
'keeper Jeremie Janot is remotely fussed, for Monsieur Janot has devised a fool-proof method to
beat the cold snap as a game ticks over into it's latter stages.
By Chris Wright
I've been waiting for a video of this to surface since Tuesday night, in so far as it was the
only slight sliver of a shred of commiseration we Forest fans were able to take from the night.
Burnley won 2-0. Rodriguez scored them both.
Anyway, with the score at 1-0, the man they call 'Jay Rod' up around Turf Moor way stepped up
and performed a timely homage to John Terry's infamously spunked Moscow spot-kick which proved to
be the only highlight of the game from a Forest perspective.
By Chris Wright
This one's for JS; a GIF or two of Blackburn winger Junior Hoilett's awful, downright shameful
attempted penalty con against Newcastle last night that eventually led to Ryan Taylor getting
booked for having the gumption to be majorly pissed off by the Canadian's little flop.
By Chris Wright
After three years in charge, a promotion from League One and decent finish in the Championship
last year, Leeds United have seen fit in their infinite wisdom to sack manager Simon Grayson with
the club 'languishing' in tenth position after losing 4-1 at home to Birmingham last night.
By Chris Wright
Anyone who has ever watched Sky Sports News on either August 31st or January 30th will already
be well acquainted with Jim White; the insufferable, eardrum-rupturing Scotch twat that covers the
deadline day vinegar strokes, booming away like a foghorn as, say, Bradley Orr arrives at Blackburn
for a routine medical, etc, etc.
By Chris Wright
Aside from the 17 ejections, two arrests and the fact that, almost entirely in unison, Anfield
saw fit to boo a victim of racial abuse at the hand's of one of their own players for the entire
game the atmosphere at today's FA Cup tie between Liverpool and Manchester United was just about as
placid and tolerant as it was ever likely to be.
foto por Brownie93
Ole Soderberg cometió el peor error de su vida con este (se podría llamar autogol) en las
fuerzas básicas del Manchester United vs Newcastle, creo que no querrá ver el vídeo de este
juego el arquero juvenil.
¿Veremos a este portero proximamente en el primer equipo de los Red Devils?
By Chris Wright
Short, sweet and does exactly what it says on the tin like Warwick Davis smeared in a mixture of
Nutella and Ronseal.
But enough about the sketchbook that got me thrown out of Art College, here's Vincent Kompany
Manchester City's erstwhile captain and leader being sent arse-over-teats backwards after being
sneaked snuck snaken snook crept up on by a small blue ninja stealth bag during training.
By Chris Wright
Bayern Munich managed the remarkable feat of pissing off nigh-on their entire fanbase yesterday
when a ridiculously misguided attempt at social marketing blew up in their Bavarian faces.
Yesterday morning, Bayern started circulating rumours on various social media sites of a 'big
new signing' that was to be announced at 1pm that very afternoon on the club's official Facebook
site.
By Chris Wright
It's not often you find yourself left in the unenviable position of having to sympathise with
Mark van Bommel, but during AC Milan's 3-1 Coppa Italia victory over Lazio last night one such
instance occurred.
With Lazio 2-1 down and defending a late corner, Brazilian centre-back Dias took an almighty
swing at Van Bommel's temples and caught the Milan midfielder with a cowardly blow to the side of
the head that left him sprawled on the turf for a couple of minutes.
By Chris Wright
It's not often you find yourself left in the unenviable position of having to sympathise with
Mark van Bommel, but during AC Milan's 3-1 Coppa Italia victory over Lazio last night one such
instance occurred.
With Lazio 2-1 down and defending a late corner, Brazilian centre-back Dias took an almighty
swing at Van Bommel's temples and caught the Milan midfielder with a cowardly blow to the side of
the head that left him sprawled on the turf for a couple of minutes.
By Chris Wright
This woman's name is Julieth Arias. She is the No. 1 choice goalkeeper for the Costa Rican
womens national side. When Costa Rica need a female goalkeeper, she is the woman they turn
to first. She is, by means of extrapolation, the best female goalkeeper in Costa Rica.
By Chris Wright
Hands up. We've been a bit lapse with our coverage of the African Nations so far. That's going
to change as soon as the group stages are over but, for now, you'll have to make do with dribs and
drabs including this startling piece of cheatery spotted during co-host nation Equatorial Guinea's
dramatic late win to send much-fancied Senegal tumbling out of the tournament yesterday.
By Chris Wright
Seeing Tony Popovic sat on the Crystal Palace bench against Cardiff last night bought warm
memories oozing back of the Croaustraliatian centre-half's finest contribution to the Premier
League annals; his majestic hooked own-goal during Palace's 3-1 defeat to Portsmouth at Fratton
Park in 2004 a sublime effort that has since seen him become a bit of a Youtube Hall-Of-Famer.
By Alan Duffy
#gobshite #withoutaclub #sixgrandoutofpocket
Once one of the country's most highly-rated young players, 32-year-old Michael Ball has been
punished by The FA for an offensive Tweet he sent to Coronation Street star Anthony Cotton.
By Alan Duffy
OMG... Da playrz h8 me... Im a total ****... FFS!!! :(
We've all done it, had a few too many down the pub only to drunkenly text someone, usually an ex
or someone we fancy. However, I doubt many of us have sent a late night text informing professional
footballers that they had been dropped for the following day's game.
By Chris Wright
Just a quickie to keep you abreast of the fact that Peter Crouch has reportedly escaped a
three-game game ban and, indeed, will be allowed to get away scot free for his sneak-attack 'finger
of doom' eye-poke assault on West Brom centre-back Jonas Olsson's corneas at the Britannia at the
weekend a crime that would almost certainly land you with a six-match ban at the very least in a
game as uncivilised as rugby.
By Chris Wright
"NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"
Remember on Sunday afternoon? Against Manchester United? When Robin van Persie mouthed the words
'oh no' as Arsenal's most enterprising attacking threat was substituted off for Andrey Arshavin?
Apparently that was a thing.
By Chris Wright
When 'super duper set-piece' penalties go wrong, you tend to end up looking like a bit of a
massive great sopping tit as Uzbekistan U23 striker Aleksandr Geynrikh found out to his cost
during a friendly game against Zenit St Petersburg last night.
By Alan Duffy
Confidence is vital to a striker, it can turn an Andy Carroll into a Robin Van Persie, or a
Fernando Torres into a Clint Dempsey. However, too much belief in yourself and you can, very
easily, become a bit of a knob (see Nicklas Bendtner).
Bury centre-forward, Giles Coke, gave us all a prime example of over-confidence in action
against Yeovil at the weekend, when he refused to hand over the ball to team captain and designted
penalty taker, Steven Schumacher (what great names these lads have!
By Chris Wright
The African Cup of Nations saw it's first (of many, if previous tournaments are anything to go
by) ridiculous goalkeeping ricket during Zambia's shock 2-1 win over Senegal last night with
Zambian 'keeper Kennedy Mweene dropping a big hairy bollock at the end of the first half, playing
fast and loose with the rules governing the size of his goal area when mopping up after a
free-kick.
By Chris Wright
In which, shortly before scoring the winning penalty in Man City's at-the-buzzer victory over
Tottenham yesterday afternoon, Mario Balotelli for reasons unknown quite obviously rakes his studs
down Scott Parker's Tibetan Fox face...
Not our Mario's finest moment.
By Chris Wright
Oxford United's veteran centre-back Michael Duberry was in rare old form against Hereford
yesterday afternoon, scoring the perfect hat-trick (one left, one right, one head) in his side's
2-2 draw at the Kassam.
You may have noticed that the maths doesn't quite add up there and with good reason.
By Chris Wright
A couple of days after Spanish site Sport.es reported that they had received exclusive mock-ups
of the fairly hideous designs for Barcelona's new kits for next season (above), designs which look
suspiciously like they may have been drawn up using the colour fade tool on Corel Draw 3.
Rafael Marquez el delantero purepecha, en el partido contra San Luis fallo una jugada de gol de
manera tan horrenda como el uniforme tipo otzo de los Monarcas Morelia, juzgue usted,fino y
apreciado lector.
By Chris Wright
The pernicious back acne makes it...
Via the excellent On The Edge Of Sanity
