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Bundesliga: Liverpool Loanee Divock Origi Produces Contender For Miss Of The Season In Bundesliga (Video)

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Divock Origi produced one of the misses of the season on Tuesday night, with the Liverpool loanee somehow managing to miss an open goal from all three yards out during Wolfsburg's Bundesliga clash with RB Leipzig.

Origi moved on loan from Liverpool in the summer after struggling to make his mark at Anfield, instead opting to get some regular game time with Wolfsburg.

Championship: Leeds ‘Keeper Felix Wiedwald Makes Incredible Howler In 3-1 Win Over QPR (Video)

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A Kemar Roofe hat-trick earned Leeds United all three points away to QPR on Saturday.

However, while the Leeds striker put on a superb individual display, at the other end of the pitch, 'keeper Felix Wiedwald blotted the visitors' copybook with an appalling and quite bizarre error late on.

FAIL: Ryan Bertrand Takes Abysmal Throw-In As Southampton Draw With Bournemouth (Video)

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Sunday's south-coast clash between Bournemouth and Southampton at Vitality Stadium ended 1-1, with Ryan Fraser's opener for the hosts cancelled out by Charlie Austin in the second-half.

With the game well into injury time, Saints full-back Ryan Bertrand proceeded to produce one of the worst throws-in the history of the game, managing to throw the ball up in the air and straight out of play.

Brighton: Lewis Dunk Closes In On Unwanted Record As Seagulls Outclassed By Liverpool At Amex (Video)

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Brighton were well and truly battered by Liverpool at the Amex on Saturday, with the Reds cruising to a 5-1 win against the Premier League new-boys Brighton.

Emre Can, Roberto Firmino (with a brace) and Philippe Coutinho all got on the scoresheet while Glenn Murray converted a spot-kick for the hosts.

FAIL: Swansea Midfielder Renato Sanches Effortlessly Picks Out Carabao Logo With Ludicrous Misplaced Pass (Video)

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Renato Sanches' prolonged career malaise continued with another anonymous performance in Swansea's 1-0 loss to Chelsea on Wednesday night.

However, in a slight change of pace for the stagnant Portuguese midfielder, he did make his way onto the post-match highlight reel courtesy of a truly woeful misplaced pass.

Backfire: Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain Goes Undercover In Liverpool Club Shop Only To Receive Brutal Criticism From Young Fan (Video)

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As part of their 'School of Scouse' series, MBNA had Liverpool legend Robbie Fowler introduce a batch of new recruits Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain, Dominic Solanke and Andrew Robertson to the Liverpudlian way of life.

The Ox's induction saw the midfielder go incognito has a regular member of the public and start mingling inside the Liverpool club shop while Fowler, stationed in a van outside, fed him instructionsthrough an ear piece.

Europa League: Leonardo Bonucci Scores Ridiculous Own-Goal As Milan March Through To Knockout Phase (Video)

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AC Milan powered through to the Europa League knockout phase with a strong 5-1 win over Austria Wien at the San Siro on Thursday, but only did so after falling behind in the most ludicrous of fashions.

Technically speaking the opening goal was credited to Christoph Monschein, but the Wien striker's weak shot only crept over the line after being nudged in by Leonardo Bonucci's backside.

Europa League: Everton Well And Truly Eviscerated By Atalanta In Godawful 5-1 Goodison Mauling (Photos & Video)

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Everton's rudderless woes were laid bare for all to see in a truly humiliating outing at sparsely populated Goodison Park in the Europa League on Thursday evening, losing 5-1 at home to Atalanta.

The Serie A mid-tablers, playing only their second ever competitive game on British soil, went a 1-0 up inside 12 minutes only to heap the misery uponDavid Unsworth's sallow side with a late blitz, popping in goals from all angles as the Toffees defence slowly dissolved into a fine mist.

Retro Football: Norwich Poacher Tim Sherwood Skies Open Goal From Six Yards Out Against Bristol City, 1991 (Video)

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Photo: Nigel French (via Sporting Heroes)

He may possess the managerial acumen of a Maris Piper, but Tim Sherwood was a perfectly decent central midfielder in his day as his three England caps duly attest.

In fact, back in 1999, Sherwood became the first player to be given an international debut during Kevin Keegan's tenure when, aged 30, he turned out for the Three Lions in a 3-1 win over Poland in a Euro 2000 qualifier at Wembley.

Chelsea Loanee Fankaty Dabo Scores Calamitous Long-Range Own-Goal For Vitesse Arnhem (Video)

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While the likes of Tammy Abraham and Ruben Loftus-Cheek are currently making their mark in the Premier League and with the England team, another Chelsea loanee got himself noticed at the weekend, but for all the wrong reasons.

Fankaty Dabo was lining out for Chelsea feeder club Vitesse Arnhem in their Eredivisie clash with Groningen when the London scored an absolute humdinger of an own-goal.

League One: Peterborough Striker Marcus Maddison Performs Two Thoroughly Embarrassing Dives In Space Of 10 Seconds (Video)

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Peterborough forward Marcus Maddison filed a strong by which, of course, we mean 'bloody risible' contender for the 2017 Fallon d'Floor award in Sunday afternoon's 2-2 draw against AFC Wimbledon.

The stirring piece actually consisted of two dives, performed within 10 seconds of one another, in which Maddison first threw himself to the ground looking for a freekick before simulating a headbutt from Liam Trotter and hurling himself back down to terra firma in mock agony.

Moron: Colombia Midfielder Edwin Cardona Aims Racist Gesture At South Korean Opponent During Suwon Friendly (Video)

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Two goals from Tottenham's Son Heung-Min saw South Korea register a 2-1 win over Colombia on Friday, but the friendly in Suwon has become a point of discussion for an altogether different reason.

Indeed, Colombia midfielder Edwin Cardona is at the epicentre after the substitute was caught making a moronic "slant eye" gesture at South Korean right-back Choi Chul-Soon behind the referee's back.

Women’s Champions League: Three Gintra Universitetas Players Combine To Miss Completely Open Goal Against Barcelona (Video)

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Lithuanian side Gintra Universitetas fell to a comprehensive 6-0 defeat to Barcelona in the Last 16 of the Women's Champions League on Wednesday evening.

At 3-0 down, Gintra did carve themselves out a glorious chance to grab a consolation thanks to an error from Barca 'keeper Sandra Panos but alas, the three cooks presented with the open-goal gift managed to spoil the broth in magnificently woeful fashion.

Oopsy Daisy: Mainz ‘Keeper Robin Zentner Literally Takes Eye Off Ball, Almost Concedes In Ludicrous Fashion (Video)

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After roaring into 19th-minute lead, Mainz held on to earn a 1-1 draw against Borussia Monchengladbach in the Bundesliga on Saturday afternoon.

Gladbach eventually equalised throughJan Vestergaard in the 67th minute but they were almost gifted a route back into the match much earlier, when Mainz goalkeeper Robin Zentner came perilously close to dropping a superb clanger.

Segunda B: Hasty Referee Blows Full-Time Whistle Just As Ponferradina Score Vital ‘Winning Goal’ Against Gimnastica (Video)

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Currently mired in the Segunda B relegation zone, Ponferradina were robbed of a vital three points in the very final second of their league tie against Gimnastica Segoviana on Wednesday evening.

With the score deadlocked at 0-0 and injury time sapping away, Ponferradina midfielder Andres 'Andy' Rodriguez latched onto a long ball humped into the box and proceeded to chip it over the Gimnastica goalkeeper with what appeared to be the final kick of the match.

Impact Sub: Argentinian Midfielder Picks Up Two Cautions 10 Seconds After Coming Off Bench, Sent Off Without Touching Ball (Video)

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Nestor Martin Alegre may very well be the proud owner of a new world record after managing to get himself sent off without touching the ball during a recent Argentinian lower league match.

Alegre entered the fray as a substitute for Madariaga against Tiro Federal last weekend, only to be shown an instant booking for entering the field of play before his teammate had left it.

Instant Karma: West Ham Fan Plummets To Floor After Attempting To Pinch Mark Noble’s Shirt From Young Supporter (Video)

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There was a little divine retribution on show shortly after West Ham's resolute 3-2 win over Tottenham in the Carabao Cup on Wednesday evening.

After dragging themselves back from 2-0 down and holding on for the victory, Hammers captain Mark Noble made his way over to the away section at Wembley to celebrate.

Thailand: Bangkok Sports Club Emerge Victorious From Mammoth Penalty Shootout Thanks To Truly Bizarre Winning Spot-Kick (Video)

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After this 'ere Thai cup match between Bangkok Sports Club and Satri Angthong finished 2-2 after extra time, the two sides embarked upon an extended penalty shoot-out that eventually culminated in one of the silliest, flukiest spot-kicks you're ever likely to see.

With the shoot-out dramatically poised at 19-19 and goalkeeper facing goalkeeper, the Bangkok Sports Club stopper sent his powerful effort clanging off the crossbar.

BundesFAIL: Cologne Striker Sehrou Guirassy Pulls Off Open-Goal Miss So Atrocious His Own Fans Refuse To Accept His Shirt Afterwards (Video)

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Cologne are having a rotten old time of it in the Bundesliga so far this season, currently squatting rock bottom in the table with just two points from their first nine games.

Scoring goals has proved to be a rather significant issue, with Cologne mustering just three goals of their own while shipping 17 at the other end.

Set-Piece Pioneers: Polish Side Use Attacking Freekick To Cooly, Calmly Concede Goal-Kick In Most Efficient Manner Possible, 2016 (Video)

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The Puszcza Niepolomice brains trust, in their element...

Concerned about leaving their defence so exposed having won an attacking freekick so far up the pitch, several Puszcza Niepolomice players got their heads together and decided to play it safe.

Indeed, during a Polish Cup quarter-final tie against Pogon Szczecin last season, the Puszcza set-piece special committee decided the best course of action was to concede possession in the most efficient manner possible to allow themselves to get back and assume their defensive positions.

Europa League: Incensed Everton Fan Attempts To Fight Lyon Players While Clutching Infant Son In One Arm (Photos & Video)

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Lyon heaped yet more misery upon Ronald Koeman on Thursday night by inflicting yet another defeat on Everton at Goodison in the Europa League.

It took just six minutes for the Toffees to fall behind to a Nabil Fekir penalty after Mason Holgate chopped down Fernando Marcal in the box.

Cyprus Swill: Matt Derbyshire Makes Extreme Hash Of Open-Goal Sitter For AC Omonoia (Video)

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Photo: @ACOmoniaNicosia/Twitter

AC Omonoia suffered a shock 2-1 defeat against little old Ermis Aradippou in theCypriot 1. Division on Sunday evening to further derail what is proving to be a slap-dash start to the season for the former.

After falling behind in the 14th minute, Omonoia pulled a goal back just before half-time when Hedwiges Maduro (formerly of the Dutch national side) stuck one away.

Can We All Take A Moment To Fully Appreciate Mamadou Sakho’s Baffling 91st-Minute Backheel Against Chelsea?

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On a weekend that saw Man City roll seven goals past Stoke, Kevin De Bruyne at his surgically-incisive best and Troy Deeney bulldoze over Arsenal's cojones, Pies' alternative highlight of the round came during stoppage time of Crystal Palace's somewhat unlikely 2-1 win over Chelsea at Selhurst Park.

Russian Commentator Quits Live On Air After Seeing Team Denied Two Blatant Penalties In Space Of 60 Seconds (Video)

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Handball in the area? No dice...

Russian commentatorVladimir Nikolsky became so enraged at seeing his team denied not one, but two blatant penalties in quick succession that he was left with no other option but to abandon his post live on air.

Nikolsky was covering the recent second-tier match betweenTekstilshchik Ivanovo andTorpedo Vladimir, the team who employ him as an in-house commentator as part of Russian league broadcasting rules.

Set-Piece Pioneers: Japanese High School Team Successfully Deploy Ingenious ‘Walking Wall’ Freekick Ruse, 2016 (Video)

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These days it's positively ubiquitous, but as strange as it is to think, the world had never seen the now-humdrum "walking wall" set-piece routine before January of last year.

Largely uncredited as they may be for innovating and subsequently adding such an instant staple to the football repertoire, 'twas the football team from East Fukuoka High School who first demonstrated the Monkees-style routine.

FAIL: Dutch Fourth Tier Side Harkemase Boys File Truly DIABOLICAL Open-Goal Miss Against VV Capelle (Video)

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Just keep it between the white sticks and you should be okay...

Sometimes it is simply beyond the realms of human communication to accurately describe the true diabolical nature of a hopelessly mangled open-goal sitter.

This, from Dutch Derde Divisie (fourth tier) side Harkemase Boys, is one such occasion.

Set-Piece Pioneers: Austrian Trailblazers SC Weiz Manage To Decimate Their Own Wall, 2013 (Video)

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The calm before the storm...

Continuing with our nascent exploration of the players and teams that have served to expand the parameters of set-piece execution over the years, we find ourselves plonked slap, bang in the lower tiers of the Austrian pyramid.

The year was 2013 and, unfettered by sporting norms, SC Weiz decided that their crunch encounter withSC Fürstenfeldbruck was the perfect time to deploy what has since come to be known as "The Crappest Freekick Routine Ever Attempted By Anyone Ever".

Chilean Primera Division: Everton ‘Keeper Eduardo Lobos Drops Almighty Clanger, Concedes Stinker Against Audax Italiano (Video)

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Photo: CNN Chile

Everton de Vila found themselves on the wrong end of a 3-0 defeat when they travelled to Audax Italiano in the Chilean Primera Division a few days ago.

The away side were already a goal behind when, shortly before half-time, veteran goalkeeper Eduardo Lobos (a sheep in wolf's clothing) dropped an industrial-sized clanger to let a second goal slip in calamitous circumstances.

Tempting Fate: Cocky Goalkeeper Gets His Comeuppance In Tanzanian Local League Match (Video)

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With his side leading 1-0 and 20 minutes left to play, one Tanzanian goalkeeper decided that a bit of cocky time-wasting was in order.

After parrying a powerful freekick, the stopper began toying with the opposing striker by waiting until the last moment to pick the ball up.

Alas, the striker's reactions were just that split-second faster.

Woodwork Wipeout: MSV Duisburg Manage To Hit The Post Four Times In Just 2.5 Seconds (Video)

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MSV Duisburg fell to a 3-1 defeat on Fortuna Dusseldorf's manor in the 2. Bundesliga on Monday evening, initially falling 2-0 behind with just six minutes on the clock.

The Zebras did at least try to fight back in the second half, going close on several occasions.

In fact, they actually managed to hit the Dusseldorf woodwork no less than four times, and all in the space 2.

Champions League: Napoli’s Lorenzo Insigne Make Amusing Cock-Up While Attempting Heartfelt Shirt Tribute (Video)

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Napoli took just seven minutes to go 1-0 up against Feyenoord on Tuesday evening, giving scorer Lorenzo Insigne the chance to perform his homage to injured teammate Arkadiusz Milik.

The Polish striker is facing a minumum of four months out after undergoing major knee surgery for the second time in as many seasons.

Wipe Out: Rangers’ Josh Windass Floors Own Manager Pedro Caixinha Three Minutes Into Old Firm Derby (Video)

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Rangers slumped to yet another Old Firm defeat as Celtic extended their domestic winning streak into a 58th game.

The Gers got things underway in foreboding fashion when, with less than three minutes on the clock, Josh Windass managed to deck his own manager, Pedro Caixinha, with an accidental sliding tackle.

Funnies

Pies’ 2017 Christmas Football Gift Guide, No.4: The Misspelled ‘Shefield United’ Collector’s Edition Calendar

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It's that time of year again, when Pies offer you all a timely assist with the oft-perilous task of purchasing Christmas presents for that football-obsessed maniac in your life.

In this instance, we thought we'd draw your attention to a piece of seasonal memorabilia that is almost certain to become a valuable collector's edition in the future.

Romanian Lower League Game Abandoned After Every Single Match Ball Hoofed Into Nearby River

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Bistrata Brosteni players warm up on their home pitch (Photo: Obiectiv)

Fans were no doubt dismayed when Sunday's big match betweenBistrita Brosteni andVanatorul Dorna Can­drenilor down in the Romanian fifth tier had to be abandoned with less than an hour played.

However, rather than crowd trouble, inclement weather or violent conduct of any sort, the match had to be nixed when a rampant bout of appalling accuracy in the second half created aterminal logistical shortcoming: there weren't any footballs left to play with.

Le Cringe: French Journalist Tricked By Spoof Report That Bordeaux Have Signed Younger Brother Of Brazilian Winger Malcom, Named ‘Douwi’

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Bordeaux winger Malcom is currently enjoying something of a breakout season in Ligue 1 this year, having already contributed three goals and four assists in the space of just seven appearances so far.

As such, it's perhaps only natural that Bordeaux might think to scour the20-year-old Brazilian winger's family tree in search of more as-yet unearthed footballing gems.

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Three (3) Sunderland Fans Make Trip To Grimsby As Checkatrade Trophy Endures Appalling Attendances Once Again (Photo)

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Grimsby were eventually toppled by Sunderland Under-21s (Photo: @officialgtfc/Twitter)

The Checkatrade Trophy continues to lurch from strength to strength, with this week's first round fixtures attracting miserly numbers in terms of derrieres on seats.

With all prestige being systematically siphoned from the competition by the EFL, Charlton drew the biggest crowd of the round on Tuesday when 1,307 fans turned out to watch their 0-1 defeat against Portsmouth.

Boca Juniors Fan Attempts To Sneak Into Bombonera Stadium Through Small Hole In Perimeter Wall, Gets Stuck (Photo)

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Flying high at the top of the Argentinian Superliga, Boca Juniors sauntered to a 4-0 drubbing of Belgrano on Sunday evening in front of a packed house at the Bombonera stadium.

Alas, there was at least one staunch Boca supporter who didn't manage to witness the victory, largely because he tried to sneak into the ground through a small gap in the perimeter wall and quickly became lodged there.

Modern Football Is Rubbish: Behold, The Half-And-Half Manager Scarf Is Upon Us (Photo)

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On Monday evening, Leicester City held West Brom at the King Power in a largely routine 1-1 draw.

Indeed, Nacer Chadli's swirling freekick to open the scoring proved to be one of few stand-out moments.

However, the fixture is sadly likely to be marked in the annals of football history as one of the darkest on record, for it was on Monday 16th October, 2017, in Leicester, that the world first bore witness to the managerial half-and-half scarf.

The Rest

‘Champions Of England, You’ll Never Sing That’ – Chelsea Fans Make Historic Faux-Pas Away To Three-Time Title-Holders Huddersfield

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Chelsea cruised to a 3-1 victory away to Huddersfield on Tuesday night, with Willian nabbing a goal and two assists in an impressive individual display.

However, in the stands, the travelling support were rather less successful with their chants, scoring an almighty own-goal when trying to goad the Huddersfield faithful.

Complete Farce: Carabao Cup Fifth Round Draw Finally Goes Ahead After Massive Two-Hour Delay

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Photo: @James_Dart/Twitter

Precisely two days ago, the EFL promised us that the draw for the fifth round of the Carabao Cup would be nothing shy of revolutionary.

Firstly, we were stunned by the revelations that the draw itself would be streamed live on Twitter for the very first time ever.