By Alan Duffy
It mustn't have been much fun growing up with the name "Pratley". Kids can be so cruel etc etc.
However, on Saturday against Man City, the Bolton midfielder almost lived up to his unfortunate
moniker after bizarrely firing in a 25-yard effort on his own goal, only for the ball to cannon
back off the crossbar.
First off, I accept that this is a pretty unfair comparison.
To rank any Arsenal team from any era against the most feted group of Gunners ever to have worn
the sacred cannon is clearly destined to be a mismatch.
It's a bit like comparing Dan Brown with Charles Dickens, or Boyzone with the Beatles.
I don't know how long Geylang United have worn green. Certainly for me I have always identified
them as the team in green. Green befits them. So why change the colour to maroon for the new
season? Apparently the club consulted with management and the Singapore FA before going ahead with
the change.
A point on the board, a clean sheet, on the road, and probably the better team by a slight
margin. All without two starters. Considering the struggles of the MLS Eastern Conference versus
their Western Conference counterparts, that's not a bad return.
Those less charitable might point out that Vancouver isn't really all that great and will
struggle to be involved in the playoff picture.
While traditionalists might blast Pachelbel's Cannon on the day of their nuptials, this bride
satiated her groom-to-be's love of the beautiful game by organizing a surprise rendition of the
Champions League anthem.
She doesn't realize it now, but this is probably the last time she'll have his attention on a
Saturday afternoon until the summer.
By Chris Wright
Don't ask us how, but Pies have acquired exclusive access to a page from the diary of one Mario
Balotelli...
9:00am - I wake up when the antique cannon I had installed in the bathroom is
fired by the homeless man that I hired as my personal cannon man.
Necessary or evil? We'll get to that....
With Liverpool in the dumpster, John Nyen sets out to save his beloved Timbers from
themselves.
If you are going to do only one thing..... you need to do it very well.
This is especially the case in soccer where the Portland Timbers have been caught doing one
thing.
AAAAHHHHHHHH I AM ARTUR BORUC AND THIS IS A LIST OF THINGS THAT MADE ME ANGRY THIS WEEK:
1. I LOVE YOU -- I LOVE YOU VERY MUCH!!!!!!!!!! NOW STOP LOOKING AT ME!!!!!!!!!!! STOP IT
NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2. THE COLOGNE SMOKE MONSTER -- I HAVEN'T SEEN THAT MUCH BLACK SMOKE SINCE RIGHT NOW WHEN I
JUST REALIZED THAT EVERYTHING IS ON FIRE!
When I think of the V-cup (formerly the NutCan), I think of stupid 8pm kick-offs and a traditional
staring competition with the eye of some storm. I'm not impressed that the correlation doesn't
involve a championship.
Can you believe it? We've won this thing before. Many times.
