by Greg Seltzer - Most popular for September 2011
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I have been strictly ordered to tell you all that I'm back now and that I haven't forgotten about
you and that I will have something proper to post later on tonight.The Distracter does not play,
homey.- Greg Seltzer
I have a quick update on the Bob Bradley saga from Egypt's perspective. Frankly, I'd much rather
see him take that job than the one at Santos Laguna. Maybe it's just me.- Greg Seltzer
I spy two guys soon the be seen in a USMNT shirt. Yesterday's tricky leg gives Charlie Davies eight
goals in 15 MLS starts this season. Meanwhile, half a world away, Sochaux have just two striker
goals in their first seven games of the new campaign. Hmm... I wonder if they think he's ready to
be back now.
Helmond Sport midfielder Charles Kazlauskas applied the fatal leaping touch on the home side's
opener in a 3-1 win over FC Zwolle on Monday night.See for yourself.- Greg Seltzer
The AZ forward has just blasted home out of nothing from 22 meters to put the hosts up 1-0 on
Europa League visitors Malmö FF midway through the opening frame. Jozy collected a loose ball
above the area with his back to goal, turned slightly and uncorked a crazy sick rocket to the top
corner without a thought in the world.
Tecos forward Herculez Gomez applied a silky smooth capper to their 2-0 win at Tijuana this
afternoon. In part thanks to his third goal of the season, the team are no within a point of the
playoff zone.- Greg Seltzer
Come talk to me about Oliver Kahn or Gianluigi Buffon when they have their own trivia tribute corn
maze like Kasey Keller does.- Greg Seltzer
So these are the USMNT cats Sean and I will see in Brussels on Tuesday... G: Bill Hamid
(D.C.United), Tim Howard (Everton) D: Carlos Bocanegra (Rangers), Edgar Castillo (Club América),
Timmy Chandler (FC Nürnberg), Steve Cherundolo (Hannover 96), Clarence Goodson (Brøndby), Michael
Orozco Fiscal (San Luis), Tim Ream (New York Red Bulls), Jonathan Spector (Birmingham City) M: Kyle
Beckerman (
I've talked to Gertjan Verbeek. He can be an intense dude. And now he's mad at Klinsi for dragging
Jozy Altidore to L.A. and back. Of course, I questioned the logic of scheduling friendlies a half a
world and four days apart, but it seems a bit much for the respectable AZ coach to take to the
media mic in this manner.
A pair of quick updates on the Bob Bradley job odyssey:- It seems while the former USMNT coach was
off flirting with Santos Laguna, a World Cup 2010 adversary, ex-Ghana boss Milovan Rajevac, entered
the picture. And so they meet again. - The Egyptian FA is scheduled to decide and announce their
new manager on Wednesday.
As you can probably tell, I've been grabbing a semi-breather since returning from wacky Brussels
with a chest cold mandated by the Belgian FA repeatedly having us stand in the rain. It's better
now and I promise to stop slacking soon. At least, I made away with some of their finest sweets.
That shop is crazy, it's like browsing for nosh at a ritzy museum.
I almost forgot to make my Champions League group predictions. Almost.Predicted group winners
listed first:Group A - Man City, NapoliGroup B - Lille, Inter MilanGroup C - Manchester United,
BenficaGroup D - Real Madrid, AjaxGroup E - Chelsea, ValenciaGroup F - Arsenal, Borussia
DortmundGroup G - FC Porto, ZenitGroup H - Barcelona, AC Milan- Greg Seltzer
Just now, second-hand from Germany coach Joachim Löw, via the team's press officer to me, now to
all of you:"He is not in Nuremberg and he has not spoken to (Timothy Chandler)."--On to the next
one.- Greg Seltzer
The sheer volume of combined calamities needed for Al-Hilal to concede this goal boggles the mind.
It's like a Keystone Cops greatest hits clip.- Greg Seltzer
I may need to do a feature column on this soon. As for the evening, Ingolstadt's Edson Buddle
bagged a pair of headers to spark a much-needed 4-2 win over Dynamo Dresden. Now with three in
eight games this season, he shares the team scoring lead.- Greg Seltzer
Just before the hour, Charles Kazlauskas has pulled Helmond Sport level on ones at Almere. He has
now scored his side's first goal in consecutive games.It's not even over yet, but the league site
already has the goods. - Greg Seltzer
I may have used this title gag before. I don't care. Tony Taylor scored on his debut to help
Atlético CP go top with a 3-0 win over Trofense. Problem is... this clip may take a while.Snide
note: Guess what formation this team plays. No, just guess.- Greg Seltzer
I would like to personally apologize to Sofia Vergara for not getting the Emmy. What
garbage...Let's start with AC Milan's Alberto Aquilani because this week he gives us the rare
header worth fawning over.Nap 0-1 Mil door goalsarena2011Ya know what else we haven't had enough of
around here lately? Sweet chips.
Oguchi Onyewu has just powered home his first Sporting CP goal to put the visitors back ahead 3-2
with 15 minutes to play. If it holds up, the Lions will remain perfect in the big guy's starts. Of
course, none of that really matters because he's no good anymore - or so I keep hearing. Ad
nauseum.Clip to come.
Oguchi Onyewu has just powered home his first Sporting CP goal to put the visitors back ahead 3-2
with 15 minutes to play. If it holds up, the Lions will remain perfect in the big guy's starts. Of
course, none of that really matters because he's no good anymore - or so I keep hearing. Ad
nauseum.Here's the goods.
So it's now time to begin my dance judge career, as promised. Here's how I'm going to do this:In
each round, I will open by showing the video, in case some would rather form their own impression
before reading mine. Then I will use the standard scale from the show, grading out of a possible
10. They don't use half-points, but I will, because I wanna.
Bolton Player of the Year Stuart Holden will be back in uniform tonight. I expect he will be
starting against Brad Guzan, who generally works this tourney for Aston Villa.- Greg Seltzer
That's my new nickname for Sir Robbie of Findley, who hath just scoreth to pull Nottingham Forest
level a minute out of intermission. The former RSL man hit his third in as many Carling Cup games
by setting off a long bomb to steal one back against the dastardly rich (a ka Newcastle).The clip
quest hath commenced, with all dispatches good and true.
Poor Steve Nash. I sure wouldn't want to play Hope Sole or the Sounders in a one-off for glory,
either.- Greg Seltzer
Tonight, SønderjyskE attacker Conor O'Brien hit the lone goal 70th minute winner in their Ekstra
Bladet Cup contest at Svebølle (just try to say "SønderjyskE v Svebølle" four times fast).I'll
get the clip hunt started while you master that...- Greg Seltzer
It will be a couple of weeks before some of my more detailed 4-3-3 explanations begin with the
purpose of knocking down misconceptions and basically getting all Dutch abstract on ya.For now, I
am going to start out as standard as possible. I'll go through each position on the formation to
offer up my current top five.
Just off the horn: Jozy Altidore was pulled from AZ's line-up to face KNVB Cup foe Groningen as a
precaution after experiencing a bit of ankle trouble during the warm-ups. The club do not expect
it's anything serious, but he will have an exam in the morning.- Greg Seltzer
While Hope Solo is off dancing, let's not forget her regular America's best crew, who got their
groove on Thursday night in Portland. And do remember: diva is a female version of a hustla... of a
of a hustla, of a of a hustla.- Greg Seltzer
The latest word I have from Egypt's spokesman is that: 1) everything is now settled with Bob
Bradley, who signed his contract today & 2) the new coach will be officially presented tomorrow at
3 pm Cairo time (9 am ET for you all). Bear in mind as we continue here that I've yet to confirm
these items with Bradley's agent.
Yes, starting my personal USMNT depth chart reveal in goal is not flashy - but it's Friday, I'm
sure you'll all persevere somehow. Naturally, the explanations will expand once we hit the field
positions, as will your opportunities to question my sanity.Looking forward in the proper uniform
number/4-3-3 role order, I will drop my right back list tomorrow and then hold off with the right
center
For the third time in four games, Charles Kazlauskas has put Helmond Sport on the board. Tonight,
he hit the first equalizer in a see-saw 2-2 share with Cambuur with a restart header burial nine
minutes out of the break.And here is the pudding.- Greg Seltzer
By the time home side Dunfermline reached the 18th minute today, they'd already suffered strikes
from Carlos Bocanegra and Maurice Edu. Half the damage done early, Rangers cruised home with a 4-0
win.I'll switch out for the usual video treatment later, but for now enjoy the GIF stylings of
magical BigSoccer ambassador Johan Derksen.
It's right back day on my USMNT clipboard, and this is where I start provoking. Exactly what it is
I provoke, we shall see. As promised, today's ranking takes us deeper into discussions of things
like tactical checkpoints, changes from the old ways and player expectations.Now into a wingback
chart, we come to one of the (two) most complex positions in the 4-3-3.
Tecos forward Herculez Gomez bagged his fourth of the season with a terrific header in a 2-1 losing
cause on Saturday night. Despite being just 11th on the team in minutes, our man is their top
scorer, with twice as many goals as his nearest teammate.- Greg Seltzer
No commentary needed, really. MLS goes sky high.- Greg Seltzer
This time, co-starring Alex Morgan. And don't forget Miss Solo does the jive tonight on Dancing
With The Stars - which means my performance review in the morning.- Greg Seltzer
Thanks to Bill Archer and a very special guest star.- Greg Seltzer
As mandated, I will first let you all watch ol' girl cut the rug. This week's assignment: jive,
which is related to swing... which has elements that are re-translated all throughout break dancing
and hop hop. For example, the "Kid 'N Play" is really just a two-person Charleston with jive
flicks.Okay, let's start with the good stuff (and I don't mean spotting an awkward looking Landon
Donovan in
It's Tuesday night, which means it's time to drop my own personal right center back depth chart -
which means it may start to get contentious.The center backs in a 4-3-3 are charged with all the
usual duties, but are specifically drilled for counter attack defense and air traffic controlling.
Of course, the biggest added responsibility is playing the ball out.
Instead of six more weeks, Stuart Holden's injury Groundhog Day will go on for another six months.
And my USMNT midfield depth charts just got an extreme makeover.- Greg Seltzer
