We aren't sure where or when these images are from, but judging by Lukas Podolski's bulge, it's new (and news) to us.

What we do need to determine is what we did to deserve this kind of Friday, and then repeat the process.

Images: sport10.at.

In yet another installment of "Lives and Bodies That Are Better Than Ours", Sarah Brandner is back with a bikini vengeance to nag us about getting into swimsuit season shape.

Featured in the April issue of Austrian magazine Sport, Bastian Schweinsteiger's 22-year-old girlfriend flashes her hip flexors as she claims to be an 'independent woman'.

Image Source: Facebook.

1. We have no clue if these party snaps are new or old, so don't even bother unless you can help put a time stamp on their shenanigans.

2. That's a ginormous bottle of Belvedere vodka, even by our standards.

3. No, we can't explain why Sven Bender's girlfriend, Simone (the blond), was seen locking lips with Mats Hummels' current squeeze, Cathy (the brunette).

St.Pauli vs Bayern Munich 2011 7 May 2011- German Bundesliga Final score:- St. Pauli vs Bayern Munich 1-8 ( Marcel Eger/ Mario Gomez*3, Arjen Robben*2, Daniel van Buyten, Franck Ribery*2) Bottom placed side St.Pauli are thrashed 8-1 by FC Bayern in the Bundesliga. Three goals for Mario Gomez, two for Arjen Robben and Franck Ribery [.

By Chris Wright

Please note that, before you scroll down, there are a couple of slightly NSFW pictures at the bottom of this here article.

Anyway, you know the feeling, we've all been there; it's a god-awful goalless draw, every passing minute seems like an eon, the game has been utterly devoid of incident thus far and there's no danger of anything happening anytime soon so you whip down your kecks and give the missus the old 'sexy heave ho' to idle away the match.

Images: © obs/AXE Unilever Germany.

Spiked egg nog may boast 'Have A Drunkenly Forgettable Merry Christmas', but nothing says 'Happy Horny Holidays!' quite like Sarah Brandner in a bubble bath.

We're not sure what holidays everyone here celebrates (but are open to hearing more!), but most of our staff grew up believing that Santa was real and Grandma couldn't ever make our favourite homemade cookies because she got run over by a reindeer.

-Jason Davis
Or so it would seem. Baby Bradley has been chugging away at Borrussia Monchengladbach in Germany for long enough now that those of us who aren't keen observers of the Bundesliga take it for granted that he'll start every week. When we check the Yanks Abroad roundups on Monday, we have every expectation of seeing his name with a number somewhere near 90 next to it.

Antes de que me lluevan piedras por parte de los aficionados rudos, les advierto que este es un regalo visual para las chicas, los hombres no se pueden quejar por la sección area chicas así que avisados están.

-adidas presenta la nueva línea de ropa interior Performance Essentials-
Herzogenaurach, febrero 2011 – Lukas Podolski revela su secreto en exclusiva acerca de cómo permanecer cómodo mientras juega en el campo.

Chris McClintick returns (Are you getting college credit for these features yet, Chris?) to TSG with a feature on Borussia Mönchengladbach (or as we affectionately call them around here "Bo'Munchen) minus one Michael Bradley.

Favre's Foals.

We are the champions!

Recently we've shared that various soccer luminaries such as Arsene Wenger and Sir Alex Ferguson has advocated a spring-to-fall schedule change in advance of the 2022 World Cup. Now we find out that UEFA itself is advancing well past the thinking stage.

The British press is reporting that the English Premier League and Bundesliga are gearing up to fight a UEFA (specifically, Michel Plantini) plan to implement a spring-to-fall schedule permanently for UEFA member leagues and alter the qualification calendar for international events.

By Chris Wright

In which preening Werder Bremen 'keeper Tim Wiese stops Bayern Munich's Thomas Muller dead in his tracks with a sublimely executed 'spinning roundhouse takedown'...

You've just been Wiese'd my friend!

After just about shaking off his concussion, poor old Muller was then throttled (quite literally!

Let's play 'we spy'. Our turn first: we spy two round things encased in red. Any guesses?! Image Source: Facebook. Cheers for the story spot, MK!

All the Lukas Podolski-loving ladies and gents of the world, meet your new role model: Monika Pulchalski's breasts.

Presumably her donation to the 'groom's gift', this photo of the newlyweds (that LP posted on his Facebook page for his fans yesterday) shows just how how buoyantly proud her (recently enhanced?

1-0 Barrios 32' 2-0 Lewandowski 43' Vuoi conoscere le classifiche, i risultati, le statistiche e le quote scommesse da tutto il calcio mondiale? Visita Calciometria.com DISCLAIMER: Calcioplus non hosta alcun video pubblicato su di esso. Tutti i video pubblicati sono caricati da amanti di calcio su siti di video hosting come Youtube e Dailymotion ed ubicati dunque su siti esterni a Calcioplus.

Amid reports that Sunderland, Galatasaray and Palermo are courting Borussia Moenchengladbach's Michael Bradley, Mike Woitalla of Soccer America reports why Gladbach coach Michael Frontzeck benched the American after 17 straight starts.

- Jason Davis
Word out of Germany this morning is that Borussia Moenchengladbach has accepted a bid for Michael Bradley (link in German).
It's not yet known where the midfielder is headed; the club simply indicated that Bradley will leave in a press conference ahead of their weekend match with Eintracht Frankfurt, and that his new club will announce the signing.

The January transfer window in Europe is a time of rampant speculation, intrigue and uncertainty. And not just for the players that move, but also for their new teammates. During this past January, several U.S. players changed addresses, with many crossing borders into new leagues and new situations.

Defending German Bundesliga champions FC Bayern Munich (or Bayern München in German) have had a disappointing 2010/11 season by their high standards thus far. Nevertheless, the Bavarian club is still in contention for a 2011/12 UEFA Champions League spot and the league title (though by a longshot). Earlier today, the Bayern Munich adidas 2011/12 home kit [.

We thought long and hard about whether it was mean to lead a post that contains heart-breaking news for Arsenal fans with a picture of Cesc Fabregas' nummy tummy. But then we figured that first and foremost, our duty is to the Kickette Army, whose appetite for manflesh will not appeased by mere sentiment.

Vuoi conoscere le classifiche, i risultati, le statistiche e le quote scommesse da tutto il calcio mondiale? Visita Calciometria.com DISCLAIMER: Calcioplus non hosta alcun video pubblicato su di esso. Tutti i video pubblicati sono caricati da amanti di calcio su siti di video hosting come Youtube e Dailymotion ed ubicati dunque su siti esterni a Calcioplus.

There likely aren't too many who suffer the delusion that Jurgen Klinsmann is a great coach. Figurehead, perhaps, but not a great tactician. The credit for '06 lies in the background with the quiet fellow rolling little bits of nose candy into his mouth as he dreamed of the day he could force Michael Ballack to retire against his will.

By Chris Wright

Robin van Persie's first goal against Dortmund last night was a fine finish in it's own right, but it wouldn't have been possible without a little bit of jinky magic on the touchline from one Alex Song a brilliant passage of play which you can now enjoy again and again and again and again until the internet runs out of batteries.

Sorry, but this is weird, no? Getty Images/Zimbio

We're prepared to admit we occasionally (and by ‘occasionally, we mean ‘every week') tend to waffle more about the EPL than other European leagues in the Weekend Results post. We don't mean to, but it's like opening a bottle of fine wine, y'see.

Just came across this funny video, it happened in October 2010 in a second division game in the Bundesliga between Hertha Berlin and Aachen, one of the player's inadvertently grabs the female referee by the tit, luckily for him she laughed it off.

Defender Ali Krieger arrived in Portugal late last night after playing for her club team FFC Frankfurt in Germany on Sunday afternoon. She participated in her first training with the U.S. team since CONCACAF qualifying last fall as club commitments have kept her in Germany. The U.S. team is just waiting for team captain Christie Rampone, who will arrive on Wednesday morning, and the 24-player camp will be complete.

Bayern Munich vs Inter Milan Champions League Round of 16- Second Leg- Allianz Arena, Munich Final score:- Bayern Munich 2-3 Inter Milan ( Inter Milan progress on the away goals rule) Disappointment for FC Bayern in Munich as Inter Milan win 3-2 at the Allianz Arena to knock out Louis van Gaal's side on the [.

Vuoi conoscere le classifiche, i risultati, le statistiche e le quote scommesse da tutto il calcio mondiale? Visita Calciometria.com DISCLAIMER: Calcioplus non hosta alcun video pubblicato su di esso. Tutti i video pubblicati sono caricati da amanti di calcio su siti di video hosting come Youtube e Dailymotion ed ubicati dunque su siti esterni a Calcioplus.

He's spotted a soldier-girl in the press conference. She's got scissors. Images: Getty Images/AP Photo/Daylife

A little post-Champions League perving for you on this fine Friday afternoon, Kickettes. Please join us.

Whilst watching his side suffer a 6-1 aggregate battering against Manchester United on Wednesday, our eyes were repeatedly drawn to right back; a position occupied by Japanese international, Atsuto Uchida.

This post is a slightly edited reprint of an article in Sports, Inc., a magazine edited by students at Cornell University in Ithaca, New York. To read the full issue, which is full of analytic insights about the major professional sports, click here or on the image below.
Open publication - Free publishing - More analysis
The article is a little bit of this, that, and everything from SBTN - some highlights and some low lights - intended for people with an interest in analytics but not necessarily expertise in soccer.

Just Desserts #7 is a post from: Just Football

We're back with another of our irregular doses of excellent football reading material to be found elsewhere around the interwebs. The following come highly recommended:

1) YOU MUST READ THIS PIECE by the magnificent Tim Vickery, who picks up a bat, finds a ball, takes that ball and smashes it out of the park with this brilliant piece on FIFA and certain quarters' hypocritical reaction to the ongoing scandals at FIFA.

Courtesy of the BBC News business section. Revenue-wise, it's not the Big 4, but the Premiership, the other Big 3, and Ligue 1.
And football's revenues keep climbing.
The most profitable league? Turns out that's the Bundesliga; also the league with the highest attendance. It also outpaced La Liga whose revenue growth is concentrated around a smaller number of clubs (Real and Barca).

Courtesy of the BBC News business section. Revenue-wise, it's not the Big 4, but the Premiership, the other Big 3, and Ligue 1.
And football's revenues keep climbing.
The most profitable league? Turns out that's the Bundesliga; also the league with the highest attendance. It also outpaced La Liga whose revenue growth is concentrated around a smaller number of clubs (Real and Barca).

I've been traveling to Switzerland, Germany, and now England these last few days, so I thought it was only fitting to post the analysis below from London where I am currently enjoying the good weather and great company of friends and colleagues. When having conversations, especially here in England and over a pint or two of good beer, it's not unusual to hear complaints about leagues becoming too unequal.

I've been traveling to Switzerland, Germany, and now England these last few days, so I thought it was only fitting to post the analysis below from London where I am currently enjoying the good weather and great company of friends and colleagues. When having conversations, especially here in England and over a pint or two of good beer, it's not unusual to hear complaints about leagues becoming too unequal.

The German Bundesliga kicks off MatchDay One of its 2011-2012 campaign Friday with a matchup between reigning champions Borussia Dortmund and Hamburger SV. With former German international Jurgen Klinsmann taking over the reins of the USMNT after Coach Bob Bradley was dismissed, and Bundesliga players Torsten Frings and Frank Rost joining MLS clubs in recent weeks, it's time to look at the league where all these players starred, and where Klinsmann coached Bayern Munich after taking the German national team to a 3rd place finish in the 2006 FIFA World Cup.

Just got a little bit longer.

Courtesy of Matthias Holst, a central defender, who is currently playing for Hansa Rostock in the 2. Bundesliga. Or rather, he is not playing but under contract otherwise his beard would be gone. Matthias Holst has made it a habit to grow a beard whenever he got injured and/or didn't play for his club.

Just got a little bit longer.

Courtesy of Matthias Holst, a central defender, who is currently playing for Hansa Rostock in the 2. Bundesliga. Or rather, he is not playing but under contract otherwise his beard would be gone. Matthias Holst has made it a habit to grow a beard whenever he got injured and/or didn't play for his club.

1-0 Kagawa S. 7' 2-0 Schmelzer M. 25' 3-0 Lewandowski R. 44' 4-0 Lewandowski R. 50' 5-0 Kehl S. 66' Vuoi conoscere le classifiche, i risultati, le statistiche e le quote scommesse da tutto il calcio mondiale? Visita Calciometria.com DISCLAIMER: Calcioplus non hosta alcun video pubblicato su di esso.

Maurice Edu returned from injury to score the final goal as Rangers hammered Hamilton Academic yesterday. Edu had been down since November, but he has featured regularly for the Scottish side this season and should be the American every team scrambles to pick up.

The MLS Supplemental Draft will help teams fill out their reserve team rosters.

Alemannia Aachen vs Bayern Munich DFB Pokal- January 26, 2011 Final score:- Alemannia Aachen 0-4 Bayern Munich On a night that saw both Kaiserslautern and TSG Hoffenheim dumped out, Bayern Munich thrashed Alemannia Aachen 4-0 in the DFB Pokal. Alemannia Aachen vs Bayern Munich 0-1 ( M.Gomez) Alemannia Aachen vs Bayern Munich 0-2 ( T.

Every week EA SPORTS is simulating big matches from the football world using the FIFA 11 engine. This week they are featuring the January 29th, 2011 matchup between the Bundesliga giants Bayern Munich and Werder Bremen.

Enjoy.