AAAAHHHHHHHH I AM ARTUR BORUC AND THIS IS A LIST OF THINGS THAT MADE ME ANGRY THIS WEEK:

1. GARY CALDWELL YOU ARE TRULY THE WORST CAPTAIN EVER!!!!!! FIRST YOU SCORED ON ME IN THE CHAMPIONS LEAGUE THEN YOU ARGUED WITH ME DURING LAST WEEKEND'S MATCH!!!!!! THE ONLY WAY YOU COULD POSSIBLY BE A WORSE TEAM LEADER IS IF YOU GAVE US ALL HERPES AND FORFEITED EVERY MATCH!

How can couple of hundreds of idiots ruin your day?

Ask Paolo Maldini. A bunch of disrespectful morons booed him off the pitch with a barrage of insults. This won't be a smudge in his CV but anyway the behavior shows how rotten Italian football is.

One of the long-lasting bacteria in calcio are so-called fans; ULTRA movement that have turned into a parody and perhaps is the best picture of the chaos in once the best league in the world.

The FA has created a season-long campaign to celebrate and promote men's grassroots 11-a-side football in England. The number of players and teams in 11v11 football leagues is in decline - and the 18-22 year old group are the most likely to drop out of 11-a-side football... (I guess video games, chasing women, and entering university will do that to you).

Hers to the left
OR
ARSEnal
OR
ARSEne Wenger
OR
ARShavin
What is it with ARSEnal and their ARSEs?

So there I was at the grandly titled Jurong derby. The Albirex Niigata supporter's club section was made up of women and children many wearing club colours. Just to their left was a smaller group of three or four people who made the 'noise.' One guy with a drum, one guy brandishsing yellow or red cards as the situation required.

It is now up to the Gold Coast Fans to get off your bums, buy a ticket and come and support a really good football team. Our team has a real chance of actually winning this competition. I am not saying we will, but we have a great chance.

Ooh la la!

Leave it to those Italians.

Juventus' Paolo De Ceglie, left, and Giorgio Chiellini, right, not only gave their shirts to fans in the wake of the Italian club's 1-0 victory over Maccabi Haifa in Israel Tuesday, but their shorts, too. (AP Photo).

I offer this picture not so much so we can ogle Italian bums (although my wife, ahem, begs to differ), but as a vivid reminder that the UEFA Champions League is on again today.