While staring at this photo of two Borussia Dortmund boys and their WAGs at a post-fashion show party in honour of sweets and other high carb/high sugar delights, we were struck by one undeniable truth: shop assistants lie. Oh, how they lie.

They lie to the innocent and cash-rich when they tell them, "Why yes, Mr Kehl, Palm Beach suits are going to be huuuge this Spring.

When he watches football... he likely doesn't watch Chivas USAWhile we are no fans of changing team identities unless absolutely necessary (i.e. Sporting Kansas) sometimes you just have to admit things are stuck in the Roller Hockey era and need a different approach (i.e. Crew, Revolution, Rapids, Impact) While not lumbered with a 90's Nike-infused identity, Chivas USA were branded in a way that alienates Los Angeles football fans who have a built-in hatred for The Goats' parent club Chivas Guadalajara.

Well it's happened again. Not even a full season back in top flight football and the "old dame" Hertha has been embroiled in a soap opera of daytime TV proportions, where nobody ends up looking good. Manager Markus Babbel and Sport Director Michael Preetz were entangled in a war of words where one was trying to paint the other as a liar and claiming who did or did not say what, when.

Tyler Polak's impressive resume should help ease his transition to the pros. (Photo Credit: Andy Mead / MLSsoccer.com)

If Tyler Polak finds himself in the starting line-up on opening day at San Jose, the 19-year-old should hardly be caught wide-eyed. The New England Revolution's second round draft pick has already faced Major League Soccer competition in a meaningful match and trained with several professional clubs.

We've semi-regularly tried to post a Friday "What to Watch this Weekend" (WtWtW) viewing guide. Starting today, we'll aim to bookend that with a companion "What We Watched this Weekend" (WWWtW) summary pulled primarily from weekend email chatter among the CultFootball crew, maybe spiced up with some video highlights.

List of football clubs around the world according to revenue, prepared by Deloitte.

Top 20 clubs in 2010-11 Deloitte Football Money League.
1. Real Madrid (£433m)
2. FC Barcelona (£407m)
3. Manchester United (£331.4m)
4. Bayern Munich (£290.3m)
5.

La Liga standing as of Feb 13, 2012 (From the Guardian)

Cast your eye at the number of goals scored by each club in the fourth column from the right. At this point is there any wonder why this is not even a two horse race anymore? The race for La Liga is effectively over as even Pep Guardiola has all but conceded defeat, for the rest it ended in September last year.

Dortmund have the right backups for a successful title defense. Dortmund had already benefitted from Robert Lewandowski's and Felipe Santana's breakthrough performances in the absence of Lucas Barrios and Neven Subotic in the Hinrunde. Now, they benefit from Shinji Kagawa's and Kuba's excellent form, in the absence of Mario Götze.

La Bundesliga alemana es de las mas infravaloradas del mundo, simplemente juegan de manera competitiva y a veces muy espectacular.
todos creen que es una liga muy fria, si, a lo mejor el clima lo puede ser, pero a veces se necesita cierta dosis de talento para poder calentar el césped e incendiar las redes de la portería.

La capolista Borussia Dortmund passa a Berlino contro l'Hertha con uno striminzito 1-0 nella 22/a giornata della Bundesliga: nonostante la notevole differenza in classifica, gli uomini di Klopp faticano a concretizzare e passano in vantaggio solo al 66' con un gol del centrocampista Grosskreutz, eroe della serata.

Bayern Munich could witness a mass walk out of its top stars if reports from the Bavarian club are to be believed. Arjen Robben could leave the club this summer as his relationship with coach Heynckes seems to be getting worse.

Robben has revealed that he is unsure about signing an extension to his contract that ends in June 2013 but has maintained that he will not be talking to any other clubs.

Blackburn Rovers' Martin & Marcus Olsson with Cedrick from K.R.A.C.K United in Kenya last summer. Image via krackunited.com.

We would never ask you to do something we're not prepared to do ourselves. And while this is an obvious opportunity for all of us to waffle on about what we would do if presented with not one, but two, cute boys and a large bucket of peanut butter, it's not compulsory to sign up to our pervy peculiar brand of eccentricity.

By FRANCO PANIZO

After years of seeing its national team underperform despite boasting some of the world's best players and most-expensive coaches, the English Football Association has decided it is time for a change.

The English FA said Tuesday that it will hire a technical director in the near future, marking the first time in 10 years that it will do so.

Like the title says, we get a Wednesday game on ESPN2: Manchester City - WBA at 2:30pm. EPL on Fox Soccer: Wigan - Manchester United at 2pm and QPR - Swansea City at 5pm. Serie A on Fox Soccer Plus: Juventus - Lazio at 2:45pm and Inter Milan - Siena at 5pm. La Liga on ESPN Deportes: Granada - Bilbao at 2pm.

STARTERS
So, what is it really like to be the coach of Egypt. Check out this insanity! From Ahram:
-National team's American coach says his recent comments to BBC, in which he held SCAF responsible for Port Said violence, were taken out of context
-Egypt's FA considers suing BBC over Bradley's SCAF comments
Mohsen Saleh who last coached Egypt in 2004 went so far as to say this about Bob Bradley: ".

By throwing bananas at Bayern Munich's goalkeeper, screaming in Arjen Robben's face after he missed a vital late penalty and all but sealing the Bundesliga title with a 1-0 win at home, Borussia Dortmund beat Bayern down on just about all fronts on Thursday. There was just one thing left to do to complete the day of domination: Have the club's bumblebee mascot pretend to urinate on Bayern's bus.

STARTERS
Barcelona has announced that head coach Pep Guardiola will leave the team at the end of the season and his assistant Tito Vilanova will take over the team.
-This new guy is the one who Jose Mourniho intentionally jabbed in the eye during a post Super Cup skirmish.

Everyone in the media seems certain that the Koln striker Lukas Podolski is going to be Arsenal's first acquisition of this summer's transfer window, but it being reported today that the Gunners are also interested in signing the Borussia Dorthund hitman Robert Lewandowski. The Polish international has had a great season for Dortmund, scoring 20 [.

This list is not final, one American still must wait on a result to see if he makes the dance and the numbers here could rise or fall over the summer transfer window. Effectively, this is an as-things-stand pre-list just to give you an idea of who will be kickin' it in Europe this coming fall.Champions LeagueGroup phaseTerrence Boyd - Borussia DortmundJermaine Jones - SchalkeQualified, group

By Alan Duffy

They say you can prove anything with statistics and the latest statistical boffinry to throw us a cureveball comes courtesy of statty men and women Infostrada, who have thrown lots of games and facts and figures into a big magical computing machine, with some interesting results coming out the other end.

This mini-serial has a new episode today. The exposition points: Thanks to sources, I can now definitively confirm that there will be no loan spell for hot USMNT topic Terrence Boyd. Borussia Dortmund have decided they are amply stocked with strong prospects at that position. They are only accepting buy offers and he will definitely be leaving the Bundesliga champs this summer.