If you're going to pull out the bag of tricks, don't dump it in a heap on the ground. Or fumble it when trying to extract something with precision. Or go to the top drawer when you don't yet have a handle on the basics.

Or be this guy.

Without the context of the game itself feel free to roll through Malaysian fixtures for an answer it's hard to know what exactly happened.

szólj hozzá: Gol de Sergio Aguero

Amazing, amazing last day. What a nail biting finish! City looked done for as full time went by and they were a goal down to QPR. They had to score twice to win the title with about 3 minutes left in stoppage as United were winning away at Sunderland.

10 man QPR were proving extra-ordinarily tough to break as City swamped them but kept running out of ideas.

Arsenal 1 (Arteta 87) Man City 0
(Premiership)

Sometimes the scoreline doesn't even close to telling the full story. It looks like we pinched a tight game in the latter stages, but in reality this was one of the best and most passionate performances we've seen from Arsenal in recent years.

Early in the season, Roberto Mancini looked ideally equipped for the challenge: unflustered, superior, endlessly cool in his natty woollen scarf.

During the game against Sunderland last weekend, however, he appeared anything but the master of his emotions.
He refused to join in the celebration of a spirited comeback, sitting alone in his managerial recliner, shaking his head.

By Chris Wright

Eighth place, below Everton, 31 points off the top, second bottom of the top flight's 2012 form league and on course for their worst ever Premier League finish, King Kenny Dalglish is rapidly losing is monarchical lustre at Anfield being, as he is, currently in the act of helming Liverpool on their worst run of form for 59 years.

Short of a miracle it will be seven years since Arsenal last won a trophy, and it now looks like we will struggle for fourth place.

I started this post before our loss to Sunderland 2-0 at the Stadium of light.

I am now sat here nervously waiting for our fifth round FA Cup tie away to Sunderland to kick off, and to be quite honest I don't know what to think.

Is Jose Mourinho putting out feelers for a return to England at the end of the season?

According to a report in The Sunday Times (subscription required), an unnamed source close to Mourinho intimated that the Real coach could leave. "He was sick and tired of this situation at Madrid.

By Joel Greenwaldt
Baltimore Blast (11-4) vs. Norfolk SharX (3-13)
Game Time: 1/27/2012 7:35 PM
http://www.misllivesoccer.com/
Keys to victory for the Blast:

• Stick to the up-tempo pace: I think the Blast played one of their best games of the season last Friday in their 18-2 victory over the SharX.

Our Manchester United fan site, covered the story on Saturday from James Lawton in the Independent on Saturday, that Manchester United were willing to listen to offers for Rooney. United immediately denied the story.

Well in Sunday's Mirror, Simon Mullock is reporting that Manchester City are planning to make a blockbuster £60m offer for the United star.

Our Manchester United fan site, covered the story on Saturday from James Lawton in the Independent on Saturday, that Manchester United were willing to listen to offers for Rooney. United immediately denied the story.

Well in Sunday's Mirror, Simon Mullock is reporting that Manchester City are planning to make a blockbuster £60m offer for the United star.

Suarez sorry but reiterates he used the word once

LUIS SUÁREZ has issued another statement following on from his decision not to appeal the eight-match ban issued by an independent commission after it found an FA charge against him proven. In this latest statement he says he apologises if his use of a certain Spanish word offended anyone.

By Chris Wright

Fulham were dumped out of the Europa League with the very last touch of the game when Odense slung in a deep cross and substitute Baye Djiby Fall nodded in an equaliser at the far post with roughly four seconds left to play (the referee blew for full-time during the goal celebration), thus robbing the Cottagers of the points they needed to edge out Wisla Krakow, who beat table-toppers FC Twente on the night to finish second in Group K -just one point ahead of Martin Jol's side.

Respected Daily Mirror columnist David Maddock wrote an interesting article about Chelsea's Fernando Torres during the week.
He explored the depths to which the once all-conquering Spanish and ex- Liverpool forward has sunken to the depths of warming the bench for his present club when he could be scoring goals for fun at his old club Liverpool.

It sounds crazy, but could a loan spell at Liverpool be the perfect tonic for Torres?

It seems almost impossible to be suggesting this, but I'm beginning to feel sorry for Fernando Torres. There, I've said it, got it out in the open, off my chest, to rank along with all those other guilty secrets like a fondness for ELO and a teenage crush on the Shake 'n' Vac lady.

John Barnes recently argued that Liverpool fans should 'move on' and stop wasting 'negative energy' on Fernando Torres, but despite the acrimony towards the Spaniard, there are still lots of fans - myself included - who would love to see El Nino back at Anfield. LFC Legends Ray Houghton and Gary Gillespie are not so sure though.

Chelsea striker Fernando Torres left Anfield under a cloud of bitter fan resentment in January, and since then, the anger and acrimony towards him seems to have grown exponentially. You would think that El Nino would be the last person Liverpool fans would want to see back at the club, but it seems that the same fans who burned Torres' shirt would love to see him back at the club.

Fredy Montero throws it all at the ball during Seattle Sounders' unsuccessful trip to Real Salt Lake. It worked out pretty well for us, though. Image: George Frey/Getty Images North America.

All the pictorial action from the first legs of the MLS playoffs is right here, cupcakes. The decisive second leg games commence tomorrow (exciting bracket thingy here for information purposes) so lap it while you can because on Friday we will be hungover as all hell and unprepared for another recap.

Gratuitous, exploitative and sexist photographs of players going about their business published just for titillation? Yes please! Image: Denis Doyle/Getty Images.

We won't disrupt your view of Iker's undercarriage with our gibberish today.

Manchester City 2-1 Villarreal

These Argentinian (or Argentine?

I look at Theo Walcott and I see a frustrated figure.
To me, he is in danger of becoming as stale as the loaf of bread that's been in my bread bin since 2007. Though he isn't as mouldy.
At the moment Theo doesn't look like he is enjoying his football.
His body language is worse than my French and his face looks like a smacked arse.

A passionate defence of an underrated Gunner, who deserves more respect!

Marouane Chamakh is an enigma to me. My gut feeling tells me he is a very important player for us, and yet his performances to date have been regarded as unimpressive.

It was a moderately diverting night in Valencia. Chelsea put in a solid performance and had come close to what would have been a solidly impressive win, only for Solomon Kalou's momentary lapse of reason for minutes from time, which cost Chelsea a penalty kick and, subsequently, two points in their Champions League group.

Image Credit: Corrieredellosport.it. Thnx Liz!

Earlier this week, AS Roma teammates Baby Bojan and Jose Angel were involved in a minor fender bender. Angel, who was behind the wheel at the time, hit a woman on a moped with his car near the Eur area as the pair were coming home from practice.

Kick of the water bottle show Suarez is a winner

Luis Suarez frustration after being substituted with ten minutes to go against Wolves on Saturday is just a sign of his winning mentality. Body Language. A term often used to backup theories of a player's discontent.

Kick of the water bottle shows Suarez is a winner

Luis Suarez frustration after being substituted with ten minutes to go against Wolves on Saturday is just a sign of his winning mentality. Body Language. A term often used to backup theories of a player's discontent.

Robin van Persie has tipped Arsenal youngster Ryo Miyaichi to achieve greatness at the club given the Japanese starlet's work ethic and positive attitude towards the game.

Van Persie watched from the sidelines as Miyaichi and the rest of Arsenal's Carling Cup squad defeated Shrewsbury Town 3-1 at the Emirates Stadium but even before the kick-off, he only had good things to say about his prodigal teammate.

Robbie Fowler believes Fernando Torres has regrets about leaving Liverpool for Chelsea, arguing that it's clear from the Spain International's body language that the wishes he'd stayed at Anfield.Fowler, who currently plays for Muangthong United in Thailand, argued:"I've heard people say that deep down Fernando wishes that he had stayed at Liverpool.

Robbie Fowler believes Fernando Torres has regrets about leaving Liverpool for Chelsea, arguing that it's clear from the Spain International's body language that the wishes he'd stayed at Anfield.Fowler, who currently plays for Muangthong United in Thailand, argued:"I've heard people say that deep down Fernando wishes that he had stayed at Liverpool.

Photo: Earl Gardner

Union

In this week's power rankings roundup, the Philadelphia Union move up one spot to no. 10 at MLSsoccer.com ("They haven't won in a long time, their body language is not particularly good right now, they're inconsistent offensively and the defense is suddenly leaky.

England manager Fabio Capello is preparing a clear-out of senior players after becoming convinced that too many of his squad have been "scarred" by previous failures, reports said on Thursday.
Several newspapers speculated that the axe was hovering over Frank Lampard, James Milner, Rio Ferdinand and Gareth Barry as Capello attempts to freshen up his team with next year's Euro 2012 finals in mind.

Over the last few days, we've looked at some of the existing members of the Spurs squad and tried to judge what sort of season we can expect from them.

At the moment, Aaron Lennon seems to be splitting opinion down the middle and some have even argued that it's time for him to move on.

Teams that make the playoffs find ways to win games; teams that don't find ways to lose.

At the moment, Chivas USA are the latter.

*Staff Writer Jill Painter has the game story.

Watch (if you can):

The body language said more than the grasping for positives comments after the game:

For Chivas USA the season is threatening to slip away.

Arsene Wenger is having none of it.

"We focus on the players we have and we believe we have enough strength. I saw all the games over the weekend and I don't see why we should be suddenly afraid of anybody in England."

Alright then. This is all deja vu time. Wenger puts up another one of his bombastic statements (choose your pick: Quadruple, Super Additions, Abou Diaby is the next Patrick Vieira) and then on the day of the match prowls on the sidelines looking sick as a dog as things don't go Arsenal's way.

I had a rant a week or so ago at some Chelsea fans with all their negativity about our performances in pre-season. People were moaning about a lack of signings and the way we were playing so I posted an article called "Enough is enough".
In that post, my message was clear, we are in pre season after only being back in training for a couple of weeks and also getting used to the climate in the Far East.

Spurs fans may soon be getting the news that they've waited for as the race to sign a striker seems to be hotting up. While we may not land Emmanuel Adebayor, Harry's comments yesterday look to be a clear indication of the club's intent to land a signature before the season starts.

So if it's not going to be Adebayor, could it be Mirko Vucinic?

Mark Lawrenson believes Liverpool may have pulled off "the sale of the century" by persuading Chelsea to pay £50m for Fernando Torres.
And the former Reds defender is backing Luis Suarez, who was brought in to replace Torres, to help the club qualify for the Champions League.
Kenny Dalglish paid £22.

(Your pardon is requested, señores y señoras; I've been sampling the vino tinto while half-watching the Vinotinto in Copa America as I compose this. Subsequent grammatical and logical failings will inevitably occur. You have been warned...)
...
And that, my fine feathered friends, is why we can't have nice things.

Former Arsenal fullback Lee Dixon believes the future of Andrey Arshavin could be away from Arsenal as his body language on the pitch shows that he is not a happy man. The Englishman who just ...

Really not sure where to start this one, but I guess Ill begin with Scocco transfer (though I'm sure most of you have heard by now). Yep, Nacho Scocco is no longer a player of AEK. And I really don't know what to say about this... literally.

Three seasons he's been with us and in during those three seasons he has left us with so many great memories: his two goals in the 4-4 Cup Final, his two goals against Oly to give us the win in Karaiskaki, his two goals (one of them being an outrageously beautiful shot, as were most of his goals) against Aris, his two goals against Vaslui, his fantastic shot against Panionios, a number of goals against PAO.

While Seattle Sounders FC rookie Servando Carrasco is only the 7th most used midfielder on the team, that should not last long. Certainly not after performances like last week when he was recognized on the team of the week with midfielders David Beckham and Juninho. While those offensive threats may get more recognition from the greater populace the defensive midfielder like Carrasco can stop build-up play and prevent the #10s in the league from advancing the ball at their feet.

Well bugger me. Who knew? Last we heard Liverpool were a deluded team caught up in their glorious but distant past, on the rebound from appointing our best ever manager. Then this.

Fulham were in many ways the archetects of their own downfall how many times have you seen Hangeland and Hughes made to look like amateurs?