The following is a copy of the letter that Eden Hazard (the budding egomaniac) sent to Chelsea upon tweeting his decision to join the Champions League winners...

What's up Chelsea,

I'd like to congratulate you on winning the most prestigious title in all of European football.

Former Arsenal midfielder Freddie Ljungberg has revealed the downsides of moonlighting as a Calvin Klein underwear model: women are always fondling him in nightclubs. It seems that Little Freddie is generally considered to be public property since the Swedish star appeared on billboards in his pants.

In my time writing this column, I don't ever recall such difficulty in thinking up material to fill my remit. It's quite absurd when you think about it, that on the back of one of the team's best runs of form in the last five years, there really is nothing to say. Professional journalists at least have the advantage of being able to stick a microphone under someone's nose and attempt to extract a comment that can be conjured into a morsel of controversy.

EXCLUSIVE: Arsene Wenger to pick 11 players + 7 subs this weekend

EXCLUSIVE: Pat Rice likes to air his knees when the weather's good

EXCLUSIVE: Striker who hardly plays could be set for move elsewhere

EXCLUSIVE: Gervinho signs dome sponsorship deal with Mr Sheen

EXCLUSIVE: Club will sell players in order to fund purchases

Ahh, that last one.

On Thursday April 12th Major League Soccer will visit the home of the Carolina Railhawks. The day will include a visit from President Mark Abbott and Will Kuhns, Director of Communications for MLS. League spokesperson, Dan Courtemanche, had this to say on the matter:
"The Carolina Railhawks invited Mark Abbott to participate in a fan forum and meet with a variety of constituents to grow soccer in North Carolina.

Garber visits Orlando to gage their expansion process. (Photo via Orlando City.)

Yesterday was a big day for the city of Orlando and for it's soccer team, Orlando City. Both were on center display to Major League Soccer commissioner Don Garber as he spoke to a group of fans at an Orlando pub.

Smart. Clever. Advertising. (Photo via Orlando City Facebook page)

I have to give it to Orlando City for this campaign. They want a MLS team and they want it badly. Check out these clever billboards that go with the one above.

While well short of embarrassing, it's looking more and more like the crowd for the March 7 CONCACAF Champions League quarterfinal -- easily one of the five most important matches the Sounders have played at home -- will be a bit underwhelming in size. As of Tuesday morning, the Seattle Sounders have sold about 16,500 tickets for their match against Santos Laguna, according to team officials (they also said about 32,000 season tickets have been sold).

Stu Holden is filming his rehab for Kick TV. Highlights include Stu falling into a pool, Stu laughing and Stu doing a multitude of other endearing things in front of his camera woman rumoured to be his girlfriend. Kickette soldier boys and girls gather.

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Also on the Kick channel right now for your viewing assessment is one of our own fearless editors.

That's the campaign for Sporting KC this season, "Live for It". The team debuted their commercial last night during the Grammy Awards. The team will be advertising with the commercial (another that will debut during the season opener), along with online, outdoor, print, and radio. The team will be doing billboards around the city, the billboards will include two of Sporting KC's newest national team players, CJ Sapong and Graham Zusi.

The Portland Timbers have released a few billboards across the Rose City. I have to say, most are on par with last year's bunch. Check the rest out here.

The Portland Timbers have released a few billboards across the Rose City. I have to say, most are on par with last year's bunch. Check the rest out here.

Pelita Jaya's biggest home crowd for many a year saw them beaten 3-1 by Persib. Ok, the game was played at Jalak Harupat which is Persib's home stadium but it used to be Pelita Jaya's though when they played there they struggled to attract fans in what is staunch Persib territory.

The game was moved from Pelita Jaya's usual home stadium of Singaperbangsa in Karawang probably because that stadium would not have been able to handle the travelling support and that makes two consecutive home games played ‘away' from home; they hosted Persija in Solo for the same reason.

Bambang Pamungkas is the Gary Lineker of Indonesian football. Even the masses who loathe and mock the local game as unworthy of their attention recognize Bepe, as he is known, as a rare rose amid fields of energy sapping mud. His cherub looks and calm demeanour have crossed over from the football field to the advertising world where his face sells various products from billboards and buses.

It is the time of year when votes are cast in Major League Soccer. These include the VW Most Valuable Player, Allstate Goalkeeper of the year Defender of the Year, Coach of the Year, referee awards and more (there are less with sponsors this year as compared to last year). We cast our votes earlier this week and will certainly report on the winners when they are announced.

Manchester United fans put a billboard mocking on Carlos incident teasing Manchester City fans. The billboard was in Manchester "city center" on Friday evening.
I didn't really understand the joke fully till I saw this picture which was was the billboards of Manchester City in 2009 welcoming Carlos Tevez to the club
I have to add, for a reason or another, no matter whatever he did, I really never liked Tevez.

Everybody loves Tim Tebow. Denver Broncos fans REALLY love Tim Tebow. A fan upset with Broncos head coach John Fox for not playing Tim Tebow has purchase two billboards to show his support. Check out the Tim Tebow billboards pictures below.

These billboards are up in Denver and, honestly, are really ugly.

In the back-and-forth battle between Manchester City and Manchester United supporters during the past two years, which included billboards in the city advertising ‘Welcome to Manchester' adorned with Tevez's face on a blue background, it's now the...
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This weekend kicks off what is sure to be a thrilling season in France. After Lyon's selfish display of seven consecutive league titles from 2001-8, the past three champions have been different and a fourth this season would be no surprise. Luckily, League 1 has always boasted an exceptional array of club names.

The quarterfinals of the WWC are starting this weekend and the US will play Brazil on Sunday at 11:30. The match will air on ESPN, Galavasion and ESPN3.com. Ian Darke will do the play by play for US audiences. The tournament has not made a significant impression on the US sports psyche. Although the games have been televised and promoted, this US team has not captured the imagination of the American public.

With most of the Premiership clubs already settled on their new kits for the upcoming season, lets play Joan Rivers and take a look at what to expect from these walking billboards. Explanations and grades included.

Arsenal

Talk about more pressure to win next season.

Roger Levesque realises a moment too late that his generosity is about to be exploited in a most alarming manner. Images: AP Photo/Daylife, Getty Images/Zimbio.

We like to feel that in the years we have existed, our influence has infiltrated the collective consciousness of the footballing world in some small way.

Time for a Memorial Day Version of the Monday After. We spent some of the weekend in the Boston area and were treated to a number of billboards on the major highways surrouding the City that were promoting the Revs/Manchester United match. The boards show images of players on both teams with large replicas of both teams' crests.

I'm pretty sure this week is already the craziest, if not the busiest we've seen thus far this season. So many teams involved in midweek games last night and all are playing this weekend. Talk about short rest for everyone but at least in some matches there is a level playing field.

The busy Saturday slate has plenty of talking points so let's get to them.

(h/t @VDub2174)

The BIMBO Bear is tired of people not pronouncing his company's name correctly, shown here in a doctored photo of one of the BIMBO billboards on I-95 and various locations in Philadelphia

While the Union have gained enough internet media popularity to have spawned two fake Twitter accounts, the team has yet to find itself with anyone who covers the team quite like The Fightins or I Want To Go To The Zoo With Roy do with the Philadelphia Phillies.

I realize this is Portland Is Wonderful Week - probably, as the saying goes, with great justice. Portland soccer is back on the map...wearing Adidas shirts. That's like, I dunno, thousands of people knocking back Diet Pepsi in downtown Atlanta.
But a couple of Du Nord links raised my hackles and my cockles.

I've mentioned before on here how the local ads the Portland Timbers are putting out are genius. I found this little slideshow over at Stumptown Footy (great Timbers blog btw) that shows off all the photos from those billboards that tower over the Rose City.

Enjoy.

I've mentioned before on here how the local ads the Portland Timbers are putting out are genius. I found this little slideshow over at Stumptown Footy (great Timbers blog btw) that shows off all the photos from those billboards that tower over the Rose City.

Enjoy.

The Portland Timbers will be participating in the MLS Supplemental Draft on January 18 at 2 pm to hopefully acquire more building blocks for their inaugural season. Meanwhile, the team finally secured the services of Kenny Cooper, who has immense talent and an impressive playing resume. The Timbers are also making off the pitch news by working with local neighborhoods to address game day parking concerns, while their ad campaign appears to have stirred concerns about the size and location of billboards around Portland.