It's the start of another brutal work week, Kickettes. Hopefully you made it through the weekend without arrest. As a much-deserved reward for staying crime-free, we are giving you a two-for-one Monday Mmm special.

Not only have we been admiring Patrice Evra's flying high-kick flexibility offering, but we've also been unable to take our eyes off the banana he managed smuggle into the Estadio Mestalla during United's training session in Valencia on Tuesday.

Are you hungry for a banana? If so, you can just go right outside the U.S. hotel and grab one. Of course, you'll have to wait for these to get ripe first. Coffee and bananas comprise 50% of Costa Rica's exports.

A little over a week ago I posted my opinion that FIFA should pass Russia over as a World Cup host due to a racist banner that flew at Lokomotiv Moscow's stadium. I'll admit that my reaction was visceral, and that I didn't not have a full sense of racism's place in Russian soccer when I wrote it.

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Planning that early-season vacation around the long-talked about U.S.-Mexico match, the one U.S. Soccer has been working on for months, the one most likely headed to Houston?

Uh, better put those plans on hold for now.

By Ollie Irish

Holy banana kicks Batman, that's even more camp than An Evening With Gerard And Zlatan (I imagine).

The story: three Brazil stars Robinho, Neymar and Ganso do their juggly seal thing to celebrate Seara's sponsorship of the Brazil national team.

By Ollie Irish

First the banana costume, now this disaster...

Bleeurgh. This is really bad, the keeper's kit too. The style of shorts, as worn by Italy to no great effect in South Africa, is particularly bad. Puma did a much better job with the new Tottenham home shirt.

Throughout his basketball career, Richard Jefferson has heard the whispers. No matter how many times he denies it, the whispers continue to surface. Recently, pictures hit the internet that caused even more whispers. Is Richard Jefferson gay? That's the question.

Not that it matters much but wouldn't it be cool to have the first openly gay major athlete in the United States?

Alexei Sorokin denies Russian football has a problem with racist fans, despite recent controversy in a league game.

Lokomotiv Moscow fans celebrated Peter Odemwingie's sale in the transfer window with a banner showing a banana and the message: "Thanks West Brom".

Lokomotiv escaped sanction, but Sorokin told BBC Sport: "The RFU doesn't accept any demonstrations of racism.

Remember how Lokomotiv Moscow fans held up a banner last month thanking West Bromwich Albion for taking Russian-Nigerian striker Peter Odemwingie off their hands? The club attempted to claim the banner wasn't racist, but the words "Thanks West Brom" and an image of a banana weren't too hard to interpret.

With just a couple of months left until the voting starts for the hosting of the 2018 and 2022 World Cup finals, it is perhaps unsurprising that a story should enter the public domain regarding racism that involves, to some extent, clubs from the two countries that are the current favourites to win the nomination to host the 2018 tournament.

With just a couple of months left until the voting starts for the hosting of the 2018 and 2022 World Cup finals, it is perhaps unsurprising that a story should enter the public domain regarding racism that involves, to some extent, clubs from the two countries that are the current favourites to win the nomination to host the 2018 tournament.

"It's no secret, for example, that in London they have the highest crime rate compared with other European cities, and the highest level of alcohol consumption among young people."

Sorokin went on to again insist that a banner with a picture of a banana aimed at West Brom's striker Peter Odemwingie and produced by fans of his former club Lokomotiv Moscow was not racist, and he points out that anti-Glazer fans had burned an American flag at Old Trafford on the same day.

A little bit of heaven, courtesy of the latest edition of The Mail on Sunday.

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Clearly, the opportunity to idle on site at historic grounds is the best thing about a soccer man's swing through England or other lands where they favor the footy.