Retired German footballer, Lothar Matthäus, did his best to act natural whilst filming scenes for his upcoming reality show early yesterday morning.

If you've been blissfully unaware of what's been happening in Lothar's life, consider yourself lucky.

The backstory is: because Lothar's repeated misfortunes both on and off the field have been closely monitored by the German media, the 50-year-old's post-pitch notoriety largely stems from him being the butt of the their jokes.

Celtic win the league cup. Quite a lot.
Kilmarnock don't win the leage cup. Not at all.
That, basically, is the backstory to a game that pitches the 14 times winners against a team that have lost on their five previous visits to the Scottish League Cup final.
This season Kilmarnock have blown hot and cold as their manager has blown mildly entertaining hot air.

Image: Leo Pix.

We've come across some potentially juicy stuff relating to the new coupling of Kevin-Prince Boateng and Melissa Satta, most of which you'll want to read and judge for yourselves.

There's both facts and falsehoods to sift through here, so a bulleted list it is.

The Backstory

- K-P married his long term girlfriend, Jennifer, two days after signing with Tottenham Hotspur in '07.

Image Credit: BIG Picture Photos.

We've been a bit fidgety lately and felt a change of pace was much needed somewhere, somehow.

Since we're too afraid to dye our hair an ombre shade of blond, our HQ was the only thing we could futz with and not do permanent damage to.

You don't mind change, right Kickettes?

Brad Rusin's career has certainly gone from good to great in the past few months. For the past two years the former UCLA man has been stalwart for the Carolina Railhawks back line. Rusin had become a franchise player for Carolina as he developed his game. However there is more to Rusin's backstory than many know.

Obviously it would be preferable if City did not use the label "Munichs" as a derogatory term for their neighbours and rivals, but they do, and have been using it for many years. Regrettable as that may be, and distasteful as the whole topic might appear to anyone with a normal sense of values, it is possibly worth saying that the use of a nickname is not quite as offensive as imitating aeroplanes and singing the infamous runway song.

There is no lead in. No amusing anecdote with a beautifully transitioned sentence to mention the topic at hand. No backstory of watching a Los Blancos match and noticing faint similarities. No. Simply put, Real Madrid of Spain's La Liga are the New York Yankees of soccer.

Their similarities are uncanny, they're virtually identical.

Please, we implore you, click, enlarge and print off these handy reference cards.

The behind the scenes story of Caroline Fleming and Arsenal's Nicklas Bendtner's romantic rendezvous is a big 'ole mess. Because the Baroness hasn't legally divorced her first husband, Rory Fleming, media speculation is rife about the various implications said in-limbo marriage will have on her newborn son with Bendtner.