The dust has settled since the 2-0 win over Serbia. I've taken the drastic step of watching a good chunk of the match a second time.

If Malouda hadn't been such a disappointment so many times before, his performances in the two warm-up friendlies would be mouthwatering. No player can match him for doing my head in with lifeless, pitiful performances maybe Trezeguet in his last few France appearances.

Whichever history making side advances from Tuesday's match at Starfire (on FSC) they will then go on a road trip. Both the Seattle Sounders and Cal FC would face the winner of the Minnesota Stars at San Jose Earthquakes game. That quarterfinal match would be on June 26th. There is an oddity in the announcement as the Earthquakes would not be hosting at Buck Shaw, but instead at Kezar Stadium.

Watch out for those maternal areas. (And any men current in the throes of a sympathetic pregnancy.)

Vadim Evseev is a longtime Russian footballer, stepping down this weekend at the ripe old age of 36. During his testimonial match, he was replaced by a 5 year old, quite thrilled to be partaking in the match, as evidenced by his stomping around upon entering the pitch.

Sporting KC had to hold on late, but came away with a 3-2 win over USL-Pro side, Orlando City in the 3rd round of the US Open Cup last night at Livestrong Sporting Park. Sporting were one of the lucky MLS sides, as MLS teams struggled against many of the lower level opponents last night, 7 MLS teams went down to their lower level competition last night in Open Cup play.

Welcome to Offbeat Wednesday, our weekly feature on the gossipy and wacky side of football! This week, read about Mario Balotelli's failed attempts to snag a date, Beckham's interview in Elle UK, The Spanish Euro 2012 Wags and more!

After Ronaldo was snubbed at a nightclub by a Portuguese model last weekend, a new story has come to light of a 19-year-old British waitress from Manchester, Laura Thorne, who turned down Mario Balotelli for a date even though the striker followed her all the way home from work (creepy) and spoke to her uncle!

Some reports today are linking Spurs with a summer move for Swedish international and PSV Eindhoven striker Ola Toivonen who has been fairly prolific in Holland, despite his current employers' previous attempts to offload him.

It is said that PSV tried to negotiate a sale for Toivonen to either Liverpool, Sunderland or West Brom last year and the player has hinted that he may leave this time around.

Sagna Confident RVP Will Stay, Wants M'Vila Signed Too

Bacary Sagna is confident that Arsenal will be successful in their attempts to secure captain Robin van Persie's long-term future and has urged the club to also sign Rennes' defensive midfielder Yann M'Vila in the summer transfer window.

How hard do we try to fit the Sounders offensive woes into our preconceived narrative? Fans of teams like Barcelona and Brazil see the Rave Green as too direct. Fans of Fucito, Nyassi and other speedsters see a lack of that now. There still isn't a traditional target man, as Eddie Johnson drifts wide and prefers the ball at his feet unless he's banging in a cross.

By Chris Wright

Barcelona beat Athletic Bilbao 3-0 (both sets of fans Catalan and Basque booed the Spanish national anthem) to win the Copa Del Rey in Pep's final game in charge last night, with Lionel Messi scoring his 73rd goal of the season sandwiched between a brace from Pedro all inside the first 25 minutes.

By Chris Wright

Barcelona beat Athletic Bilbao 3-0 (both sets of fans Catalan and Basque booed the Spanish national anthem) to win the Copa Del Rey in Pep's final game in charge last night, with Lionel Messi scoring his 73rd goal of the season sandwiched between a brace from Pedro all inside the first 25 minutes.

Sunday's Torneo Clausura matches saw a couple of surprising results, and one spectacular return to Argentine football. Olimpo beat Independiente 2-1 to record their first win in eleven attempts, and Belgrano saw off Vélez Sarsfield 1-0 to reach 52 points ... Continue reading →

You could hear it being said by the fans as we all walked out of PPL Park, you could hear it from the players themselves in post-game interviews.

Even though the Philadelphia Union lost 3–2 to New York, that was the best game the team played all year.

How was that so?

Offense

When we talk about the team having a good game, we mean just that—not just a typically strong defensive effort, but also a good offensive effort, a total team effort.

Andy Carroll tries a trick...We all hoped that the last game of the season would bring us some joy, but, as predicted, it didn't. A slightly changed Liverpool XI couldn't muster much of a performance for the final game and it was only Andy Carroll that really threatened the Swansea keeper.

Another advert released for Euro 2012 is Carlsberg's Fan Academy. Carlsberg have taken to using as many famous football faces as possible in their recent attempts, and this is no different, with three wannabe England football fans being shown round England's Official Fan Academy by Des Lynam. The advert contains names such as Lynam, Peter [.

The latest chapter in ex-season ticket holder Paul McGeady's ongoing attempts to get some answers of the club regarding their ticketing strategy and treatment of it's fans, or as they see it, customers; see's the club choose not to reply to Paul's latest correspondence much to Paul's disdain. Are you a membership holder or a [.

Kenny Dalglish believes his Liverpool side finally got what they deserve at Anfield on Tuesday as they rounded off their home campaign with a 4-1 win over Chelsea.
A convincing victory over the side that put them to the sword in the FA Cup final just three days earlier offered a clear indication of what the Reds are capable of.

This weekend or next we have the opportunity to clinch third place, and to celebrate, each in our own way, the annual pleasure of St Totteringham's Day.

Although of only recent inception, St Totterigham's has now become a popular and much anticipated event. Oh how we love it! But it is not the only annual Arsenal celebration, and so I propose that we formally instate another shared feast.

This weekend or next we have the opportunity to clinch third place, and to celebrate, each in our own way, the annual pleasure of St Totteringham's Day.

Although of only recent inception, St Totterigham's has now become a popular and much anticipated event. Oh how we love it! But it is not the only annual Arsenal celebration, and so I propose that we formally instate another shared feast.

New England 2-1 Colorado The New England Revolution came away with the win against the Colorado Rapids when Fernando Cardenas scored the last of the game's three goals in the 39th minute. Despite both teams combining for 36 attempts on goal, 13 of which were on target, neither side could find the back of the [.

In January 2006, we were in a bit of a mess.
Patrick Vieira, the lynchpin of three title-winning teams, had been abruptly sold in the summer of 2005 and we had failed in our attempts to buy a replacement. Fabregas and Gilberto did their best to strike-up an effective partnership in midfield, but couldn't cover up the fact that we had a hole in the middle of the side.

Peharps Newcastle felt safe in their chances for CL action next season. Maybe they have been over achieving. Either way, their game came crashing down today as they took on lonely Wigan and got their backsides handed to them. Wigan outshot and out possessed Newcastle and Victor Moses scored a brace in a matter of 3 minutes early in the first half as Wigan showed some attempts to stay up with a
[[ This is a content summary only.

The Philadelphia Union won their first ever game on the road in Los Angeles, defeating Chivas USA 1-0 at the Home Depot Center. Freddy Adu's first goal of the season - assisted by Michael Farfan - gave Philadelphia its second win of the season.

First Half

Chivas' Ryan Smith almost opened the scoring in the first minute of the game, but his cross near the goalmouth was cleared out of the box by Gabriel Farfan.

Omar El Kaddouri has appeared in this portal on at least two occasions in the past so suggestions elsewhere that the name might not be familiar to us aren't quite true. However, if reports coming out of Italy are to be believed, Spurs have now made an offer for the Belgian under 21 international.

By Alan Duffy

Back in Swedish football after the women's league in the USA was postponed, Brazilian superstar Marta Vieira da Silva showed why she is reportedly being paid $400,000 a season to line out for Tyresö with a superb back-heeled goal.

Wearing the number 100 jersey, her attempts at starting a trademark celebratory Brazilian samba with her team-mates was rather less successful, mind.

The Arsenal Ballet.

Always appreciative of attempts to fuse together the beautiful game with fine arts, this spot for the Citroën DS5 was pretty well-executed. While the location looks like a luxurious room at Versailles, Arsenal's Alex Song, Wojciech Szczesny, Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain, and Bacary Sagna learn ballet with dancers from the English National Ballet.

I will continue my attempts to quantify what's happening in Major League Soccer through some statistics discussion. I'm going to put aside the Power Rankings for a week or two, but suffice it to say, Sporting Kansas City has not ...
Visit http://www.majorleaguesoccertalk.com for the rest of the story.

TweetFrank Lampard has warned Barcelona that Chelsea are eyeing revenge when they face the Catalans in the UEFA Champions League semi-finals. Chelsea suffered a controversial away goals defeat to the current holder back in 2009 in a match which saw Guus Hiddink's Blues side denied four clear penalty attempts as Andres Iniesta's injury-time strike sealed [.

Peter Nowak said of the Philadelphia Union's offensive struggles after Saturday's draw with Vancouver, "I think that it's the whole package, it's not just that they're afraid to shoot, it's just more the whole situation of why don't I take the safe pass instead of be more opportunistic and take a chance on the shot on goal.

In this post game video blog I take a look back at the loss versus Columbus and try and figure out the Jeckyl and Hyde routine that Toronto FC has been up to so far with success in the Champions League and zero wins in three attempts in MLS.
Rating: 0.0/5 (0 votes cast)

Nothing happened. For all the attempts of journalists and bloggers alike to extract a narrative from the day's cagey and inconsequential action, the clash produced nothing that would inspire a Union fan, or disappoint one. The restored back line, topped off by MacMath's continued competence, revived faith in a defense that never should have faltered in the first place.

The Reds have offered trials for Bright Gyenfi, a 16-year-old defender and 18-year-old midfielders James Akaminko and Nurudeen Amed are on the books of Prampram Mighty Royals.

According to skysports, A number of Premier League giants are interested the trio but the the teenagers are set to arrive at Anfield by April.

By Clemente Lisi – Harrison, NJ (Mar 26, 2012) US Soccer Players – "Wait until next year." That may as well be the official slogan of the New York Red Bulls. The club embarked on its 17th MLS season three weeks ago with the intent of making the playoffs and ultimately winning it all. Of course, all previous 16 attempts to win MLS Cup have fallen short.

TweetManchester City boss Roberto Mancini has laughed off attempts by Sir Alex Ferguson to unsettle his side with ‘mind games' as the Premier League title race reaches ‘squeaky bum time'. The two clubs are neck-and-neck at the top of the Premier League with only goal difference separating them as the season reaches a dramatic climax.

That was easy then. Arsenal completely outplayed Aston Villa and won comfortably while cruising through the second half in second gear. The macro-level stats provide a good picture of the game. Arsenal completed 534 or their 608 passes that led to 72 percent possession as against Villa's 152/226 passes and 28 percent possession.

SPANISH FOOTBALL action continued tonight with five scheduled matches of Round 29. Big games with surprising results that will now be quickly summarized with final results & scorers. Falcao for At.Madrid ATLETICO DE MADRID managed a very important 2 - 1 victory over ATHLETIC CLUB BILBAO that will give the Club a moral boost in their attempts to climb into Euro table positions.

After the dispiriting effort in Portland that saw only 5 attempts on goal, 2 of which were on target, the Philadelphia Union offense showed signs of life against Colorado. Although that game also was a loss, the Union did manage 20 attempts on goal. While that is a cause for celebration, it is important to remember that 10 of those attempts were off target and 5 were blocked.

Former young Arsenal star Fabrice Muamba is tonight in hospital fighting for his life. The Bolton mid-fielder collapsed during the FA Cup tie at White Hart Lane.

Medics spent ten minutes treating the stricken player on the pitch, using both mouth to mouth resuscitation and a defibrillator in attempts to revive him.

Well, that wasn't very pretty, was it?

What can we learn using the match stats from the Chalkboard at mlssoccer.com's Match Center about the Philadelphia Union's 3–1 loss to Portland Timbers in Monday night's season opener?

Passing and shooting

Portland had a greater number of passes and a better passing accuracy percentage with 482 passes with a passing accuracy of 72 percent.

Quotes and Videos:

From the Philadelphia Inquirer here are the Union's quotes for the night and here from MLS.

Tifo Display from Pressbox: Don Garber at Halftime: John Spencer: Eric Alexander: Kris Boyd: Links:

MLS Site: Don Garber calls today a "Warm and Sunny day in Portland"

Canzano: Someone call Hell!

That is how you start a season! The boys in burgundy controlled the game and kept attacking and were rewarded with a 2-0 win. A stat indicative of the Rapids dominance is attempts on goal, with Colorado having 17 to Columbus' 5. The biggest negative to the match was the home side's inability to convert those attempts to shots on target, only getting 5 accurate strikes off (compared to Columbus' 3).