There's been quite an explosion of high-profile ladies linking up with La Liga stars as of late, and it's sometimes hard to make sense of the semi-translatable details, no? Google translate has yet to come up with accurate descriptors of things like "glitter Gucci belts" or "short-tents in green jeans", which can make even the most sedate La Liga loving Kickette frustrated.

Taking the anti-Beckham approach to baby blooming in public, Alex Gerrard proudly showed off her barely-there bump in a fitted black top whilst shopping at La Senza in Liverpool yesterday. She and her Elemis bag have a certain glow about them, don't they?

We have no clue what 'complications' mean when the term is applied to a groin strain. And quite honestly, we have no desire to know. It's never going to be good, especially when it involves Liverpool and England midfielder Steven Gerrard.

Instead, let's focus on what Alex Gerrard might be carrying as she visits her poor hubby in his hospital bed.

Hmm...what do we have here?

Polished toesies in semi-normal peep toes? Check.

A plump pout in a fabulous fuchsia hue? Yup.

Tamed tresses? COMO SAY WHAAAT?!

It must be opposite day, Kickettes, because we're about to commend Carly Cole for looking good. For the second time in two months.

Image via PacificCoastNews.com

If you are in Londontown, get thee to The Mayfair Hotel stat. It's crawling with 'ballers, WAGs, celebs and hangers-on. (Well, perhaps not on a Monday afternoon, but when the weekend rolls on you best be ready with your sky-high heels, spray tan, and a well-rested liver.

Click here to view the embedded video.

Kickette Army boys and girls, it's time to put a little deposit in your karma bank (yes, ours is overdrawn, but we'll make up for it with some short tents, pinky swearsies).

In fact, nice healthy short tents and the men who pitch them are important to all of us, so in support of Cancer Research UK's Do Me A Favour campaign, we encourage you to send any men in your lives a friendly check-up reminder from Gary Lineker.

Image via sports.ru

You all remember Yulia Voronin, right? She of the tracksuit that will never die? Of course you do.

Mrs. Voronin, whose husband Andriy formerly played for Liverpool and currently plays for Dynamo Moscow, has given a truly spectacular interview to a Russian sports site.

Images: Antenna3 via Glamour.es. Thanks L!

Oh, looky! Aitor Ocio and his stellar abs (and bad denim) are featured in a new Glamour ES interview. What do you need to know? Aitor is a self-confessed flirt. That's the basic gist. He also talks about his ex, Lara Sanchez and their daughter. If you don't live near an internationally-stocked newsagent, we suggest you book a flight abroad and pick up a copy.

Pregnant 'Hollyoaks' soap actress, Sheree Murphy, showed off her thin, pregnant pins outside Alex Gerrard's baby shower at the plush Vincent Hotel in Southport. Harry Kewell's wife (pregnant with the couple's 4th) was accompanied by Cricket Boutique shop owner, Justine Mills, and a smorgasbord of gender neutral wrapped presents.

Image: Facebook.

Saturday

- The Ronaldo family brought the LOLz all weekend long. While Ron and his piggy posed together, Irina Shaykweight spent NYE in Vegas and CRJR was carted around by Aveiro family members who were clad in denim eye-busters and brain bleeder white boots.

Nine days. That's the time it took Alex Gerrard to recoup from the birth of her third child before hitting up Cricket in Liverpool.

New world record?

Image via sabotagetimes.com

You might not think there are many downsides to working for Kickette, but there are. The actual writing, for one thing. Having to maintain constant vigilance over your secret emergency chocolate bar, for another.

That all pales in comparison to one staffer's recent assignment, though.

Foosball tables make Lucas Neill come over all intense-like. Image: Robert Cianflone/Getty Images AsiaPac.

Saturday

- We're still not taking sides in the Shakira/Pique relationship roundabout, but Spanish journo Javier Sarda certainly has. He added more fuel to the speculative fire by stating that the pair are more than just friends.

Are you lot going to stop riding us about dumping Fernando from the F5 list soon? When he heard about his exclusion, he upped his game, and judging by the above photo of Frank Lampard in training with Chelsea during their Malaysian tour the other day, the idea has caught on. We're doing you a favour by making them work for it, people, help us to help you!

Only a few days ago, Alex laughed cheerily in the face of full-time employment. How times change, eh Kickettes? Image taken 21.09.2011.

Hold onto your britches, Kickettes, today's quasi-story about Alex Gerrard 'wanting to work' is a doozy.

Yes, the UK's poster girl for ladies who lunch in a leisurely manner is gonna have her own timecard to punch soon, if the rumours are true.

We take our footwear very seriously here at HQ. While we've never come to blows over who gets to wear what shoes and when, there's a first time for everything.

Frankie Sandford is adorable. This is a fact. She's healthy again and back to making tunes with The Saturdays, which is fine and dandy.

Are your Louboutins hung by the chimney with care? Have you already gotten so wasted at your office holiday party that you've had to quit your job in shame? Have you opened all of the gifts with your name on them and then re-wrapped them so no one knows about it? Then you are ready for Christmas, dear Kickettes.

L-R: Sara Carbonero in Alaia, Sylvie van der Vaart in Georgio Armani, Irina Shayk in Alexander Wang. All images via Getty

2011 was the first full year of life for our Kickette baby, The Style Files, and it's been quite a year for WAG fashion. We brought you loads of exclusive fashion spots, shared unsolicited opinions on fashion weeks near and far and tried to use our brain power to figure out just how many black fur coats Alex Gerrard owns.