Image: ALEXANDER KLEIN/AFP/GettyImages. You think Sergio Ramos and Fernando Torres ever get tired
of co-signing "SerNando" on fans' memorabilia? Since both of their siggys are required, how
attached at the autograph are they? Is it always Sergio who starts things off with "Ser" or are
there instances where Fernando scrawls his "Nando" suffix first?
Denmark to beat Brazil. Then this happened. Image: JOHANNES EISELE/AFP/GettyImages. Judging from
some of the upsets the big boys experienced over the weekend, Euro 2012 could well be won by a late
entrant i.e. three Kickette staffers, two of their pets and a cab driver from London named Steve.
Images: Getty Images.
Image: PATRIK STOLLARZ/AFP/GettyImages. Friday morning on our detoured way to work we noticed you
a stunning mix of blondes and brunettes at national team training, four of whom with exposed
midriffs. We were the fence-climbing pack of females merely following their evolutionary drives.
Our eyes met yours as we were being escorted us off the [.
Preparations are underway for the Copa del Rey final between Barcelona and Athletic Bilbao at
the Vicente Calderon tonight. Both teams are in search of their seemingly elusive 'Trophy of the
Season' to round up their domestic campaign in a fitting tribute to Pep Guardiola. So what's it
gonna be?/ Photos via AFP & Miguel Ruiz
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Images: AP Photo/The Canadian Press, Jonathan Hayward; PATRICIA DE MELO MOREIRA/AFP/Getty Images;
Reuters Pictures.
We watched an awful lot of football over the weekend. In case you have a life and were outside
living it, here's some of the better highlights...
Good: (at left) Flavio Ferreira celebrated Academica's defeat of
Sporting Lisbon in the Portuguese Cup final by making an illegal approach on Helder Cabral.
Image: JANEK SKARZYNSKI/AFP/Getty Images.
Welcome to the Sopot Sheraton Hotel in Poland, where the Ireland NT will be free to enjoy all of
the benefits of being an elite athlete.
In moderation.
Obviously, Giovanni Trapattoni's recent statement had the Kickette Masssive on high alert, so
we're particularly interested in the environs of the Sheraton, because with any luck we'll be
spending lots of time there.
Montpellier's Younes Belhanda picks up the award for 'Most Effective Use Of An Accessory to
Increase One's Hot Quotient'. Image: FRANCK FIFE/AFP/GettyImages.
It was meant to be a celebration of all that's great about French football, but having browsed
the the stills from last night's Ligue 1 Awards, we doubt we'd have fact checked too heavily if
they'd been labelled 'Ligue 1 Metrosexual of the Year' Awards.
Image: BULENT KILIC/AFP/GettyImages.
Milan Baros organised a police escort to protect him from the Kickette massive on his way to the
dressing room after he and his Galatasaray teammates were crowned 2011–12 Süper Lig
Champions.
In light of recent events, that was a very reasonable measure of protection.
Neymar's hair is clearly succumbing to the awkward growing out phase and let's just say thing ain't
going too well. Image: YASUYOSHI CHIBA/AFP/GettyImages.
Image: SERGEI SUPINSKY/AFP/GettyImages.
To celebrate Ukraine acting as joint hosts of the EURO 2012, this blindingly beautiful, highly
expensive footballing prize will be displayed at several locations across the country, allowing
the public to gawp at it to their heart's content. If they're really lucky, they may even get the
chance to run their fingers over its fine curves.
Fernando Llorente was struggling to contain himself during his team's Europa League Final training
session yesterday. Image: PIERRE-PHILIPPE MARCOU/AFP/Getty Images.
Whether it's stealing a piece of the pitch (and putting it into a beer funnel) or fighting over
the remnants of the goalpost, Borussia Dortmund fans know that this season is one they'll remember
for a long time. Ich gratuliere, German Champions! / via AFP
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Image: PATRIK STOLLARZ/AFP/GettyImages.
It's always a shame to say farewell to an old friend, but we find it so much harder when they're
buff as hell and brandishing babies. Raul's cheery send off from Schalke on Saturday s thoroughly
traumatic.
Travel with us, if you will, but know this.
After four years, three La Liga titles and two Champions League trophies, Pep Guardiola has
decided to step down as Barcelona manager and take a break from the intensive atmosphere of leading
"més que un club." Though Barcelona still have four league matches and the Copa del Rey final
left to play, Guardiola announced his decision at a press conference on Friday (video below), which
was attended by many of his frowny-faced players.
If the producers are out there and reading this, may we kindly request more of this man? Image:
PAUL ELLIS/AFP/Getty Images.
They're in eighth place in the table, have put that cringeworthy issue behind them and now
they've got their own reality TV show. Life is good.
Liverpool's six-part docudrama, "Our Lives: As Sexy Beasts" "Our Liverpool: Never Walk Alone,"
will air this autumn in the U.
If the producers are out there and reading this, may we kindly request more of this man? Image:
PAUL ELLIS/AFP/Getty Images.
They're in eighth place in the table, have recently put those cringeworthy racial issues behind
them and now they've got their own reality TV show. Life is good.
Liverpool's six-part docudrama, "Life as Sexy Beasts" "Our Liverpool: Never Walk Alone," will
air this autumn in the U.
Image: PATRIK STOLLARZ/AFP/Getty Images.
The locker room Gods and Kick TV's Ryan Bailey heard us loud and clear and made it rain in the
back-to-back Bundesliga champions' dressing quarters.
We do not have any more of where that came from unfortunately Kickettes. So instead, please
enjoy pics of the team doing other fun, silly or celebratory things.
Image: PASCAL PAVANI/AFP/GettyImages.
Yoann Gourcuff returned to Ligue 1 last night for Lyon, after an extended lay-off that has seen
speculation mount about his future in the club.
Yo-Yo replaced Grenier Clement on 64 minutes, but was unable to make an impact in the game,
which finished 3-0 to Toulouse.
Image: ALEJANDRO PAGNI/AFP/Getty Images.
Did we mention we've taken an interest in bespoke tailoring recently?
We were looking at his short tent to discover Nicci's aesthetic preference. Pinkie swear.
Image: ADRIAN DENNIS/AFP/Getty Images.
We're throwing in the towel early on this week's match results so the comments are all yours,
Kickettes!
Milan owner and former Italian prime minster Silvio Berlusconi is on trail for having sex with
an underage prostitute and the latest revelations about his infamous "bunga bunga" parties will
likely add to your day terrors for a while.
Model Imane Fadil testified against Berlusconi on Monday, where she stated that the first time
she accompanied Berlusconi to one of his parties, he gave her €2,000 in cash and told her "don't
be offended.
Image: THOMAS KIENZLE/AFP/Getty Images.
We're clearly not the only people in football who appreciate a fantastic midfield display.
Stuttgart's Martin Harnik and Vedad Ibisevic do too.
We always believed we'd bring the world around to our way of thinking. Looks like we're getting
closer to reaching our goal two screaming teammates at a time, doesn't it?
Image: PIERANUNZI LUCIANO/AFP/Getty Images.
As we are sure you must be aware by now, Livorno's Piermario Morosini collapsed on the pitch on
Saturday during his side's Serie B game vs. Pescara. Despite efforts to revive him, he passed
away.
At 25-years-old Morosini had already suffered terribly in his life, losing both his parents
before he was eighteen and his disabled brother shortly after.
Image: FRANCK FIFE/AFP/Getty Images.
Barcelona defender Eric Abidal is "recovering well" from his liver transplant, the club
said this morning.
The operation took place on Tuesday. While the family have requested that no official statement
be made at this time, we would like to take this opportunity to send Eric and his cousin Gerard
(the donor) our best wishes for a swift recovery.
The quiff. The casually knotted tie. The hand-in-pocket insouciance. For us, the only way this
picture could be any better is if Super Mario Gomez was naked.
Care to explore that theory further, Kickettes?
Marseille 0-2 Bayern Munich
1. Is Mario Gomez wasted as a footballer?
Image: GLYN KIRK/AFP/Getty Images.
We noticed Spurs medic Shabaaz Mughal milling about during last night's FA Cup replay vs.
Bolton. Are we seriously going start a war between two London clubs over the relative hotness of
their medical staff?
Yes. We think we are.
Mesut Ozil was the latest victim of the increasingly popular crotch grab a technique we
occasionally employ in our own dealings with players. Images: PIERRE-PHILIPPE MARCOU/AFP/Getty
Images, REUTERS/Vincent Kessler.
The crotch grab as a disabling tactic was first utilised by Wimbledon's Vinny Jones against
Gazza in 1988 and since that time, many illustrious players have fallen victim to it's startling
simplicity and effectiveness.
Ashley Cole has never been the People's Favourite Footballer, but there's a
fair chance he's working towards it. Cole arrived at the London Chest Hospital yesterday with QPR's
Shaun Wright-Phillips to visit his friend, stricken Bolton player Fabrice
Muamba.
Figo's poor distraction ploy was doomed from the start. Images: DESIREE MARTIN/AFP/Getty Images.
Terrifying trousers on hot footballers is something we've had to get used to in our time, but
Luis Figo has confounded us with his late, spectacular entry to the hall of shame. The former Real
Madrid, Barcelona and Portugal international sported these spotty monstrosities whilst playing in
the Abama Pro-Am Golf Tournament last week, and while golf trousers are notoriously heinous, we're
positive that not even serial style offender Ian Poulter would have gone near these things with a
nine-iron.
Sporting Lisbon fans posed with Man City's mascots last night. What it's supposed to be again...
a Rabbit-alien hybrid? / via AFP
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Up-close and personal with the Futbolito of them all, Cristiano Ronaldo / Photos via AFP
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You do not want to know the man who owns these thighs, trust.
Last night Steven Gerrard was busy ruining David Moyes' 10 year anniversary while Mario Gomez
was putting on a scoring clinic at Basel's fragile expense.
Neither blew our minds more than this close up of one Bayern Munich player's crotch (and
subsequently, his identity too) as well as the newest episode of Geordie Shore that was on.
Ah, there's nothing like celebrating a comeback goal like a
five-year-old, is there?! Just ask Thomas Vermaelen, who scored
the winner in stoppage time for Arsenal in their thrilling 2-1 win over Newcastle last night.
Vermaelen's goal sealed the deal with a SNAP because no other team has
trailed from a goal down (each time) to win four consecutive Premier League games.
Arsenal fans? Allow us to distract you with a bulge/bottom/belly related three-fer!
Two football matches, four teams, 22 players, five goals on the night, fourteen across the
fixtures.
Holy smokes! We can't believe we got that right on the first attempt!
Arsenal 3-0 AC Milan (3-4 agg)
Image: ADRIAN DENNIS/AFP/Getty Images.
Image: GERARD JULIEN/AFP/Getty Images.
Regarding Cesar's mysteriously darkened groin is that round black splotch simply a shadow casted
by his arm or is something far more worrisome lurking in his pants?
And by worrisome, we mean intriguing.
Despite retiring from football, Ronaldo is still followed everywhere he goes in Brazil. Here, a
fan embraces him after his visit to the Maracana stadium in Rio. Ronaldo is in Brazil's World Cup
organising committee. / via AFP
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A great goalkeeper who's also useful in a crisis. Oh Joey, as if we didn't love you enough already.
This post contains some scenes you may find disturbing.
A lot of them involve hair.
Denmark 0-2 Russia
Y'see Arsene? This is where you've been going wrong.
What is Thomas Müller guiltily hiding beneath that jacket, Kickettes? If it's what we hope think
it is, he's gonna need a bigger coat. Image: CHRISTOF STACHE/AFP/Getty Images.
The Answer : Zero, if you are a fan of Manchester United or close to two hundred if you're this
man! / via AFP
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Cesc Fabregas tuvo un programa de televisión en Inglaterra mientras jugaba con el Arsenal, era
como el niño prodigio para los ingleses, por eso no es de llamar la atención que sea invitado
para eventos de la farandula como los BRIT Awards 2012 ,el ahora jugador del Barcelona entrego un
premio junto a la cantante y juez de X factor Nicole Scherzinger.
