A word of advice for Rio Ferdinand, you will have plenty of time to attend movie premieres, start a music label and run your very own magazine when you decide to hang up your boots. Until then, as long as a fat cheque comes to your house every week signed by Manchester United Football Club, kindly concentrate all your energy and effort on the pitch.

Manchester United booked its passage to the knockout phase of the UEFA Champions League in dramatic and somewhat embarrassing fashion. If a side like CSKA Moscow can come to Old Trafford and score goals in the manner they did, I don't think the Special One at Inter Milan or Barcelona's Pep Guardiola will be having sleepless nights worrying about United's threat to their title hopes.

The first 45 minutes between CSKA Moscow and Manchester United was an insult to the legend that is the Luzhniki stadium. Less than two years ago, it was the scene of United's dramatic (with the Red Devils, when is it not so?) European Cup triumph over a tearful John Terry and company.

It pains me to have to agree with Rafa Benitez. But Mr Zonal Marking is probably right. Not about zonal marking. But on the notion that the top teams will be losing more often this season as the league becomes more open and clubs realize that it's not illegal to play two forwards against the likes of Liverpool and Chelsea.

Apologies to Ireland, Slovenia, Ukraine and Bosnia. FIFA does not want you at the World Cup in South Africa next summer. So fervent was its determination that the rules of the competition were changed midway through it with the introduction of a seeding system in the qualifying play-offs.

Ninety minutes (excluding added time and ‘Fergie time') this morning reminded me why I stay up at 2.45am to watch twenty-two millionaires play the beautiful game. What an encounter it was between the German and English title holders, truly CHAMPIONS league football! I've learnt never to doubt a German man (ladies, please take note) because Wolfsburg manager Armin Veh was true to his word when he said he would be attacking Manchester United from the start at the Theatre of Dreams.

The Wolves are on the hunt at Old Trafford. And I don't mean the ones that got slaughtered by Sunderland over the weekend. This is the real deal, the German Wolves known as Verein für Leibesübungen Wolfsburg-Fußball GmbH but more conveniently referred to as VfL Wolfsburg. As the reigning Bundesliga champions, this is their first foray into the UEFA Champions League, and what better way to be introduced into the top tier of European football than with a trip to the reigning English and World club champions (it really hurts me to not be able to put European champions).

I wish to thank Paul Scholes for saving my television set. His looping header prevented it from exploding because of all the incessant whistling and other indescribable noises that the Besiktas fans were making up until that point. Not that it stopped after his goal, because the silence lasted for all of 15 seconds because the Besiktas fanatics found their voices and sore throats again.

This is a reality check week of sorts for Manchester United's opponents three pretenders hoping to emulate the Red Devils' domestic and European success over the years. Spurs have been downed in pretty emphatic fashion; next up is the Turkish champions, followed by the small matter of the Manchester derby.

Forgive me, fellow Manchester United fans. I am still not convinced by our beloved Red Devils despite two impressive (at least on paper) wins over Wigan and Arsenal. It's great to be winning when you're not playing at your best, and especially beating a Gunners side that is playing the best football by far of any team on that side of the planet.

It's not often that another team in England, let alone in Manchester, hogs the headlines more than Manchester United. But it's not often that a British team gets bought over by an Abu Dhabi investment group, although football clubs are starting to replace private islands and super-yachts as the new playthings for the filthy rich.

This could be Wayne Rooney's season. No, this will be Wayne Rooney's season. It has to be. For too long has this prodigious talent stood in the shadow of a certain Portuguese maestro (I don't mean Nani) at Manchester United. Now that this distraction has left (how I wish it was Nani), it's time for Rooney to show why Sir Alex Ferguson made him the world's most expensive teenager (although he didn't look like one) in world football back in 2004.

The Galacticos era has returned to Real Madrid. This time though, president Florentino Perez has signed players (let's face it, coach Manuel Pellegrini has little say in the transfers, although he wouldn't be complaining about the signings thus far!) with the long term in mind.