English football in 'shambles' shocker. With a major tournament around the corner, the FA intervene and strip John Terry of the England captain without consulting the manager. The manager resigns. England have no captain, no manager and naff all chance of winning Euro 2012.
In many ways, I don't blame Fabio Capello for leaving.

We're delighted to welcome lovely fella, stand-up comedian and Spurs fan Carl Jones to Cheer Up Alan Shearer. With Spurs second in the table, here's Carl's first guest post about whether his side can actually win the league...
.............................
It's mid-January. Tottenham Hotspur sit three points adrift of leaders Manchester City and level on points with Manchester United.

I spent much of the Christmas period in France, and I was delighted to see that there is plenty of TV coverage of the English Premier League. Not only was I able to watch more a less the full round of fixtures on Boxing Day, but also the rescheduled Arsenal v Wolves game the following day. Coverage was pretty good too.

On Tuesday night, a Liverpool side minus Luis Suarez and with Andy Carroll playing up front got spanked 3-0 by Manchester City.
On Wednesday night, a sparkling Newcastle side spanked Manchester Utd 3-0, with Demba Ba, their Senegalese striker, scoring an absolutely splendid goal.
With every game that goes by, Andy Carroll (£35m, 4 goals in 23 appearances) looks more and more like a white elephant and his replacement in the Newcastle number 19 shirt (£0, 15 goals in 19 appearances) looks increasingly like the steal of this or many another season.

It's been a good week for racism in football. Luis Suarez has been banned by eight matches and fined £40,000 for racially abusing Patrice Evra whilst Chelsea and England captain John Terry faces a racially aggravated public order charge for allegedly abusing QPR defender Anton Ferdinand in a match in October.

I've received an early Christmas present.
Much to my wife's delight, our kitchen calendar next year will be the Official Wolverhampton Wanderers FC Calendar for 2012.
I don't know what it's like in your house, but in ours, the kitchen calendar is the source of all knowledge: if it's not in the calendar, then it's not happening.

Farewell then to Sócrates Brasileiro Sampaio de Souza Vieira de Oliveira. Better known throughout the world simply as Sócrates, captain of perhaps the best side not to win the World Cup. 60 caps and 20 goals for Brazil; drinker; smoker; political activist; humanitarian; surely one of the greatest, coolest players to grace the game.

101 Great Goals #58 - Darren Ambrose
Gary Neville called it the best goal he had ever seen an opposition player score at Old Trafford. It's a bold claim, but Darren Ambrose's strike that helped knock Manchester United out of the Carling Cup was an absolute belter.
And here at Cheer Up Alan Shearer we're delighted to bring you this superb goal with some rare Alan Partridge commentary.

Before I say anything else, let me just make it clear that I think that Gary Speed's death yesterday, at the age of 42, is unquestionably tragic; an awful, shocking piece of news. It's difficult for me to imagine a circumstance so terrible that hanging myself seemed the best option, and I hope I never experience anything remotely approaching it.

Well, I never thought I'd see the day when I saw a major sporting organising body displayed levels of incompetence to match the likes of FIFA or the FA. It looks as though the RFU, the body governing English rugby union may just about take the biscuit.
Let's take a moment to remember that rugby fans - myself included - like to assume the high ground in any conversation with football fans: the players and the fans are better behaved, the referee is treated with respect and his decisions are final.

I listened to a bit of John Terry's press conference today on the news.
It made me wonder why they bothered with them. Seriously, when was the last time that you heard something interesting at a football press conference from a player (or, indeed, from anyone)?
To be fair to Terry, the questions that most people wanted to ask him were related to the racism row that is the subject to a police investigation, so he can hardly be blamed for not wanting to comment on that, and I suppose he was pretty brave to front up at all when he didn't have to.

I originally published this post here back in November 2009, talking about the crusade to try to shame all Premier League clubs into attaching a poppy to their playing shirts, but the current furore around FIFA's refusal to make an exception and allow the English football team to display the same emblem on their shirts in this week's international match against Spain is essentially the same argument being repeated again.

I think this might very well be the greatest advert in the whole, wide world.
Looking good, Luis. Looking good. Still got it, for sure. But only -- ONLY -- because you have no visible grey hairs. Learn from him: to the shops! No time to spare! Just For Men is the answer!
Like I say, the best advert in the world.

You may recall that a month or so ago we shared a video of what was generally believed to be the longest headed goal in the history of football. Jonas Samuelson had scored this header from his own half in a Norwegian league match, leading to a well-deserved fifteen minutes of fame.
Well, he must be livid.

I know he's not everyone's cup of tea, but I like Neil Warnock. After yesterday's 3-1 defeat at the hands of Tottenham Hotspur, Warnock had this to say in his post-match press interview:
"I found myself clapping when the third goal went in it was such a fantastic goal by Bale. It's a pity he's not English.