Who Ate All the Pies

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Updated:
May 23, 2018 12:01 UTC
Added:
September 12, 2006 10:06 UTC

Dream Start: Scottish U14 Side Score Straight From Kick-Off With First Touch Of Game (Video)

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Surely one of the fastest goals in footballing history was scored in the Scottish U14 cup final clash between Spartans and St. Andrews B.Cat Airdrie's Excelsior Stadium.

Louis MacLachlan was the scorer of the goal, with the youngster, no doubt under instruction from his manager, launching a long-range effort direct from kick-off.

Purest Partridge: Michael Owen Returns To Corporate Shill Scene With Sensational Performance In Personal Injury Lawyers Advert (Video)

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Image: Alexanders Prestige

Whether taking delivery of a Range Rover from a chap called Alexander or offering us spine-tingling helicopter tours of Dubai, over the years Michael Owen has truly proven that professional football's loss has definitely been brand ambassadorial work's gain.

After a brief hiatus, the former England striker has once again dipped his toe in the corporate quagmire, lending his esteemeddynamic acting range and well-honed comedic timing to a stunningly memorable new advert for Gowing Law Solicitors, ambulance chasers at large.

‘It’s So Incomprehensible I’m Already Laughing’ – Radja Nainggolan Takes Being Frozen Out Of Second Successive Belgium World Cup Squad In Jolly Good Humour

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Radja Nainggolan certainly seems to be taking his omission from the Belgium World Cup squad incredibly well, with the midfielder revealing that he's already able to laugh at his own misfortune.

The Roma star, who only played six minutes of the Red Devils' qualifying campaign, wasn't even included in Roberto Martinez's provisional 28-man squad for the tournament when it was announced on Monday afternoon.

Solidarity: National Team Captains Of France, Denmark & Australia Write To FIFA Asking For Banned Striker Paolo Guerrero To Be Allowed To Play At World Cup

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The national team captains of France, Denmark and Australia have all written to FIFA pleading that Peru striker Paolo Guerrero be allowed to play at the upcoming World Cup.

Hugo Lloris, Simon Kjaer and Mile Jedinak have all co-signed an official letter, submitted to FIFA asking that fellow Group C rivals Peru be allowed to include Guerrero, who is currently serving a 14-month drugs ban.

Shit Lookalikes: The Young Unai Emery & The Old Johnny Marr

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Off-kilter spot from Pies fan Ben Kelly here, but we can definitely see what he's gunning at if you'll excuse the shamefully intended pun.

There are parallels in the mop tops, coupled with both blokes having less meat on them than your average butcher's pencil...

Two undeniably charming men, nevertheless.

England: Gareth Southgate Picks ‘Meticulous’ Harry Kane As Captain For 2018 World Cup (Photo)

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The decree has been issued, the beacons lit and the ancient blood ritual performed: Harry Kane is the new England captain.

Gareth Southgate informed the Tottenham striker that he will be Three Lions skipper for the first four games of the World Cup at a team meeting at St George's Park on Monday.

Arsenal Release New 2018/19 Puma Home Kit – First Strip Of The Post-Wenger Era And It’s Not Great (Photos & Video)

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Photos: Puma Football

Arsenal have officially released their new Puma home kit for 2018/19 and, unfortunately, it looks like the leaked images we featured a week or several ago were spot on.

The pale red 'knitted' torso, the iffy 'invisible' collar, those awful pinkish sleeve stripes all there.

Grant Holt Signs ‘Multi-Show’ Contract With WAW Wrestling Company, Due To Start Training This Week

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Image: World Association Wrestling

Following the well-worn path trodden by the likes of Tim Weise and that Burton Albion goalkeeper, Grant Holt is making the entirely natural transition from professional football to professional wrestling.

The 37-year-old striker, who spent last season at Barrow in the National League, has signed a "multi-show contract" to perform with World Association of Wrestling (WAW).

Official: West Ham Make Manuel Pellegrini Highest Paid Manager In Club’s History (Photos)

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West Ham have gone and got themselves a new manager in the shape of ex-Man City boss Manuel Pellegrini.

The 64-year-old Chilean cut short his stint at Hebei China Fortune to make the switch back to the Premier League and has since signed a three-year contract with the Hammers.

MLS: Zlatan Ibrahimovic Sent Off After Slapping Opponent In Head During LA Galaxy’s Clash With Montreal (Video)

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Zlatan Ibrahimovic was sent off during LA Galaxy's MLS clash with Montreal, after the Swedish superstar slapped an opponent in the head.

The incident happened in the first-half of the game at theStade Saputo, after Michael Petrasso stood on Ibrahimovic's foot.

Reports: Arsenal Ready To Appoint Unai Emery As New Manager After Mikel Arteta Passed Over

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Just a quickie to keep y'all abreast of the fact that it looks like Unai Emery will be the man stepping into Arsene Wenger's shoes at Arsenal.

Mikel Arteta had reportedly interviewed well for the role but it would appear that Emery is now poised to be appointed as the Gunners' new manager after talks today saw the ex-Sevilla and PSG coach emerge as the premiere candidate for the post.

Modern Football Is Rubbish: Coventry Release Special One-Off Wembley Kit For Play-Off Final After Club ‘Exhaust Supply’ Of Regular 2017/18 Home Shirts

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Photos: @Coventry_City/Twitter

Coventry City have announced that they will be wearing a special 'one-off' kit in the League Two Play-Off final, where they'll face Exeter City at Wembley next Monday night.

The Sky Blues claim that they've been forced into producing a bespoke outfit for the occasion because supplies of their standard all-blue 2017/18 home strip have been "exhausted".

Eintracht Frankfurt Caught Attempting To Smuggle DFB Pokal Trophy Through Airport Security In Jonathan De Guzman’s Bag (Photo)

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Eintracht Frankfurt gave Bayern Munich an almighty spanking in the DFB Pokal final on Sunday afternoon, with Niko Kovac's current side powering to a 3-1 win over Niko Kovac's future side.

After revelling the night away at the Olympic Stadium, the victorious squad then flew back from Berlin to Frankfurt for the big trophy presentation but not before midfielder Jonathan De Guzman adopted a very 'Derek Smalls' approach to getting the trophy through airport security.

Belgium: Roberto Martinez Names Provisional World Cup Squad, Radja Nainggolan Omitted As Nacer Chadli Squeaks In

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Belgium manager Roberto Martinez has named the provisional 28-man squad he will have at his disposal at the 2018 World Cup.

Several of Martinez's selections haven't gone down particularly well, particularly the decision to leave out Radja Nainggolan in favour of the likes of Nacer Chadli and Christian Benteke.

Portuguese Cup Final Match Ball Delivered To Referee Before Kick-Off Using Mysterious Arcane Sorcery (Video)

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Desportivo Aves caused a bit of a shock in the Portuguese Cup final on Sunday when they beat Sporting Lisbon to lift the trophy for the first time in their 88-year existence.

Aves finished 13th in the Primeira Liga this season having only ever spent three seasons in the top flight of Portuguese football, but nevertheless managed a 2-1 victory over Sporting, who have won the Taca no less than 16 times before.