This cracking video must have slipped through the Pies net last month, but is still worth showing
now. Cheeky Leroy Lita spots Jens Lehmann wandering off for a rant and figures that he will
probably have to return to his goal at some point. Schoolboy humour at its finest! [Rob Parker]
Ever run around like a loon during a football match? Hugging complete strangers and screaming until
your throat breaks? Ever done it in a quiet room, triggered by the sound of the theme from Match of
the Day? Look into my eyes...
[Mof Gimmers]
Name Abigail Clancy. Pies knows her simply as Abi, cause we're tight like that.
Nationality British WAG of… Liverpool & England beanpole Peter
'decent feet for a big man' Crouch. Not exactly sure if their on/off relationship is on or off
right now, but no matter. Abi began dating Crouch in January 2006 after the pair met at a bar in
Liverpool.
With Liverpool looking forward to a stroll in the Anfield park tonight in their second-leg tie
against PSV, this training video shows Harry Kewell close to a return to the first-team after being
out witha suspected fractured eyelash. If you're going to watch this video, may I advise playing
some amusing music to accompany it to make it even more surreal.
Uefa director of communications William Gaillard has urged European police forces to follow the
British example in the wake of crowd trouble involving English clubs. Manchester United and
Tottenham fans were involved crowd trouble on their visits to Rome and Seville last week and in
both instances, the local police were accused of being to over-zealous and heavy handed with their
approach to sorting out the violence on the terraces.
There is something wrong, almost contradictory, about an uncompromising centre-back with a girl's
haircut. The surftastic barnet of Roma's Philippe Mexes is no exception. The Frenchman's normally
assured performances (although he horrendously lacked any sort of assurance last night) and
sunkissed highlights have earned him the nickname Laurent Blond.
Given last night's amazing action, we thought it'd be fitting to post the highlights of Roo's debut
for Man Utd, on 28 September 2004 in the Champions League against Fenerbahçe. This is how he
announced his arrival… Yep, the boy's a bit special.
Pies will miss Cookie Coleman. He has lovely shiny hair, big manly thighs and a finely tuned sense
of humour. He's also a damn good manager and despite Fulham's poor form I didn't get the feeling
that his time at Craven Cottage – ten years of sterling service, as a player and manager – was
coming to an end. That said, I actually think Mo Al-Fayed and the Fulham board have made a brave
decision.
Improbably, the quadruple is still on after Chelsea overpowered Valencia last night. The English
champions' second-half performance was not pretty (compared with events at Old Trafford, at least)
but it was an awesome display of power, stamina and mental strength. Valencia are very strong at
home and it takes a very strong team to go there and get a win.
Bayern Munich are in pole position to face Manchester United in the Champions League semi-finals
following their 2-2 to draw with AC Milan at the San Siro. For the return leg tonight expect the
Germans to be kitted out in this football/rugby hybrid effort from the house of Adidas. To be
honest I would be feeling shortchanged if I had splashed out on last season's kit.
AC Milan striker Ronaldo is the latest celebrity guest to be given The Simpsons treatment. The
Brazilian - looking quite trim here next to Homer - is in an episode due to air on 22 April. His
character will apparently teach Lisa how to play football, well soccer but you know... [Via The
Offside, Rob Parker]
If Milan get past Bayern Munich tonight (a pretty big if but I think they can do it), then we'll be
treated to a Man Utd v Milan CL semi final. That means we get to watch the world's two best
players, Kaka and Cristiano Ronaldo, face off. And what cute faces they are too. Many non-Man Yoo
fans I know argue that Kaka is better than Ronaldo. The Brazilian is a couple of years older than
Ron, so it's a little unfair to compare the two directly.
Excellent news for both Newcastle and England is that Little Mickey Owen found the net on his
return to action. The 27-year-old scored 10 minutes into his comeback against mighty Gretna in a
behind-closed-doors friendly. Owen has been out of action since sustaining a sickening knee injury
against Sweden in last summer's World Cup. He played for 70 minutes and remains on target for his
pencilled-in return to first team action against Chelsea on 22 April.
'The fact that three English teams should be in the semi-finals probably makes our league the best
in Europe.' So says Alex Ferguson and who are we to argue with him? He continues: 'Six or seven
years ago Spanish football was the best. But on the evidence of this season Barcelona and Real
Madrid are not as near to where they were in previous years… The competitive nature and the
quality of the English game has improved over the seasons.
Some Pies readers have been pondering how Zinedine Zidane still rakes in £8.5 million a year
having hung up his boots. The answer is by making a living from being a formerly sweaty footballer.
[Rob Parker]
