An Open Letter To Xavier Hernández:

Dear Mr Hernandez,

Can I call you Xavi? Or, as Del Boy from Only Fools and Horses or Gypsies would say, can I call you Chavvy?

Let me begin by saying that I think you are a marvellous footballer. I love to watch players like yourself play the game. At times its like watching my mate Phil play Fifa 2003 on Playstation 2 and he was well good at that game.