Sigh . . . I don't even want to write about this

Anyway, next year's home openers are out, and for the third year in a row, Toronto gets to go down to Columbus. And it's a big deal, because Toronto fans don't want to go, and the Crew fans don't want them there and Columbus is great and all but really it sucks and we're not rivals anyway but your front office wants us to play you and it's this bizarre dance of teacher teacher she touched me first, no, she did she did.