Mr. and Mrs: The Patos

Images via Reuters

AC Milan's resident man-child, former brace face and all-round cutie-pie Alex Pato is off the market. He married his girlfriend, Sthefany Brito, last night in Rio.

Before we go into the crazy-making details of this momentus event, we must point out that in 90% of the photos, Sthef appears to be doing some sort of victory punch/ happy dance with a side order of gloat.