Off the Post Archives for January 2012

Top five theories about Sergio Aguero’s mystery ‘stupid injury’

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Manchester City manager Roberto Mancini has revealed that Sergio Aguero is out with a 'stupid injury' to his foot. But the Italian wouldn't be drawn on the cause of the mystery ailment which will rule him out of tomorrow's match against Sunderland. Mancini said: "It is a stupid injury. It was not his fault.

Bet’s be ‘avin you: Football betting tips for the 31st March – 1st April

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Last week Gylfi Sigurdsson ruined our profit party, but wins for Bolton and Southampton meant that we got our money back on the £50 staked. Time for a big profit week methinks. First bet concerns the Championship's relegation battle, where Portsmouth have responded well to their impending doom. Whilst I don't agree that they should [.

The world is watching. A huge weekend for…

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Manchester City Quite simply, if they want to win their maiden Premier League title, they will probably need to win every game between now and the end of the season. Their recent record is less than impressive, with defeats to Swansea and Everton. Roberto Mancini won't need me to tell him that Manchester United won [.

Free £50 bet with your Premier League betting tips

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Manchester City v Sunderland (Saturday, 3pm) Free £50 Bet for All New Paddy Power Customers Imagine you're a Premier League manager, three points off the leaders, with some patchy form of late, but 1/4 with Paddy Power for a home win that will take you joint top. How do you prepare? Well, it's doubtful Alex [.

Bolton to call upon Celine Dion-loving midfielder to face Wolves

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Bolton manager Owen Coyle is set to give youngster and Celine Dion fan Josh Vela a start against Wolves. The midfielder, who counts My Heart Will Go On as his favourite song, is expected to bolster Coyle's depleted options in the middle of the park. Vela first came onto OTP's radar in January 2011 when [.

Video: Iker Casillas picks his nose and wipes it on a child’s face (Apoel Nicosia v Real Madrid)

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Real Madrid goalkeeper Iker Casillas decided to use his side's trip to Apoel Nicosia to showcase his revolting side. The Spain international was seen picking his nose in the tunnel before the match. Having dislodged the offending blockage, he then wiped the same hand across the face of a young mascot!

Al Wasl manager Diego Maradona storms the stands to defend his wife

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Diego Maradona waded into the stands like some kind of portly superhero after his partner Veronica Ojeda got into a row with fans of opponents Al Shabab. The Argentine star, manager of Dubai side Al Wasl, went to confront supporters who had fought with Ojeda and Al Wasl player Juan Mercier's missus. Al Shabab forward [.

Liverpool Kenny Dalglish in pointlessly narky press conference shocker

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Kenneth Dalglish, the great press conference raconteur, has yet again turned an innocuous question from a journalist into a talking point. The Liverpool manager responded to a straightforward question about the role of one of the club's hottest prospects in his now customary passive aggressive style.

Cash-strapped Kettering Town to wear 1970s kit to raise money

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Kettering Town are going back in time in a bid to overcome their current financial woes. The Nene Park side are donning a retro 1970s kit for Saturday's match against Stockport County. The theme day is down to a special one-match sponsorship deal with betting site Betfair. The novel approach to tackling an impending winding-up [.

Kitman: Birmingham fans angry over disused away kit

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Birmingham City supporters are kicking off over their away kit, which hasn't been worn since pre-season. Manager Chris Hughton has taken a strong dislike to the blue and black striped kit. The Inter Milan-ish outfit got a couple of wears in friendlies before Hughton decided the yellow European shirt was his preferred change kit.

Lionel Messi signs for French side Angers

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Lionel Messi has made an exciting transfer move to French outfit Angers but it's a Cameroon under 17 international rather than his Barcelona superstar namesake. OTP is doubtful that it's his real name, but it's certainly the name that the 16-year-old has registered under at the Toulouse-based side.

Teen girl charged after attacking opponent at USA High School

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When Chester High School faced Lewisville High School on Monday, you would have been forgiven for thinking that a match between two sets of college girls may not necessarily be too high on quality or excitement (and that isn't intended to sound grotesquely sexist). However, when Annette McCullough was tripped up by an apponent, she [.

AC Milan’s giant Pac-Man tribute – Video

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Although the AC Milan v Barcelona game last night intensely disappointed after promising to be a rerun of the knockout classics of the early nineties, with Messi, Ibrahimovic, Robinho and Sanchez all failing to affect the match as much as the neutral would have liked, there was a damn fine impressive display pre-match from the [.

Video: Bradford v Crawley ends in a massive punch-up

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It's not usual to see a bit of handbags at football stadiums up and down the country on a weekly basis, but it rarely goes beyond posturing and a bit of shoving. But last night's League Two clash between Bradford City and Crawley Town ended up in a proper punch-up after the final whistle.


Video: Karim Benzema’s incredible miss (Apoel Nicosia v Real Madrid)

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Real Madrid did eventually manager a comfortable away victory against Champions League minnows Apoel Nicosia, but they must have wondered if it was going to be their day when this happened. Karim Benzema, arguably Europe's most in-form striker, managed to miss an open goal against the Cypriots. The Frenchman just had to tap-in after the [.

OTP Podcast – Episode 31: Anfield Crap

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Ep.31 Anfield Crap by Off The Post on Mixcloud It was all about the weather at the weekend as the summer sun came early to light up a bevy of eventful Premier League match-ups. We take a peek at the North London clubs, where Arsenal bask in a seven-game winning streak and Spurs continued to [...]


Top five conclusions: Benfica 0-1 Chelsea

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1. All the talk of the players frozen out by Andre Villas Boas and Salomon Kalou barely got a mention. Chelsea fans will be glad he was back in the starting line-up last night. 2. John Terry just can't help himself. 3. Bobby Di Matteo's approach to European football name as many players from [...]


GIF It: David Vaughan’s horror own goal (Sunderland 0-2 Everton)

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Meanwhile, at the fake Estadio da Luz, Sunderland midfielder David Vaughan was providing plenty of entertainment. Mainly for Everton fans. The former Blackpool man somehow managed to bundle the ball into his own net from a tame Nikica Jelavic effort and under no pressure whatsoever. Credit has to go to Vaughan's left foot for the [.

Video: Chelsea’s Frank Lampard falls prey to Portuguese prankster Emplastro

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Frank Lampard's arrival in Portugal for Chelsea's Champions League clash against Benfica saw him come face-to-face with a local joker called Emplasto (the plasterer). The prankster has made himself a bit of a celebrity by hijacking TV coverage of high-profile figures. He seized on the opportunity to join Frank for a photo with a young [.

Grass Geoff Shreeves tries to get a European ban for Chelsea’s Raul Meireles

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Sky Sports reporter Geoff Shreeves did his best to endear himself to Chelsea fans by going on TV to announce that he had snitched on Raul Meireles to UEFA. The ex-Porto midfielder had received a warm welcome from the Benfica supporters. Shreeves said there were suggestions that Meireles had responded by making a gesture towards [.

John Terry sees a guy with an Afro…

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... and can't resist grabbing his throat. Attacking the corner didn't seem quite as tempting as attacking Axel Witsel!


Manchester City star Mario Balotelli gatecrashes the unveiling of new Inter Milan boss

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New Inter Milan manager Andrea Stramaccioni could have been forgiven for thinking his first press conference in his new post would be his moment. But he hadn't banked on Inter old boy Mario Balotelli returning to his old stomping ground. The Manchester City striker gatecrashed the unveiling to say hello to his former employers.

GIF It: Manchester United granny gives the linesman both barrels

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Manchester United's below-par performance in their 1-0 win over Fulham made it a difficult watch for the Old Trafford faithful. An offside call from the assistant referee tipped one elderly United fan over the edge, so she decided to give him an earful. We've heard lots of humorous theories on what she says but we [.

Video: Messi, Drogba, Torres, Lampard, Aguero and Wilshere play crowdsurfing football

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Remember we brought you the photo of Lionel Messi, Didier Drogba, Fernando Torres, Frank Lampard, Sergio Aguero and Jack Wilshere looking like the worst boyband ever? Well, here's the fruit of their work with DJ Calvin Harris for a new Pepsi advert. The footballing ensemble show off their skills by treading on the heads of [.

Chelsea striker Didier Drogba quaking in his boots at the prospect of facing Benfica

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Didier Drogba has fallen foul of Chelsea's Champions League opponents Benfica after appearing to mock them. When the draw for tonight's match was made, the Ivorian striker was caught by Chelsea TV cameras shivering in fake fear at the prospect of facing the Portuguese outfit. Benfica boss Jorge Jesus said: "Drogba only knows what he's [.

Video: Houston Dynamo’s Colin Clark calls ball boy a “f*cking faggot”

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Houston Dynamo player Colin Clark stirred up controversy during his side's match against Seattle Sounders by shouting a homophobic slur at a ball boy. Clark labelled the youngster a "f*cking faggot" as he went to retrieve the ball for a throw-in. He later tweeted an apology for the outburst. He wrote: "I'd like to offer [.

Random 1990s Footballer Tuesday: #27 Ritchie Humphreys

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Name: Ritchie Humphreys In his 1990s prime for: Sheffield Wednesday Lowdown: After being a Sheffield United fan as a boy, Humphreys was released by the club's Academy at the age of 13. However, in 1995 he left school and was signed by Sheffield Wednesday to their youth squad. After a season playing on the left [.

Top five worst Premier League managerial spells

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With Terry Connor not exactly shining in his first managerial post at Wolves (a 0% winning percentage sort of speaks for itself) he may be a contender for the worst manager in Premier League history. Here are five other contenders for that particular award, and there were many more. To make it fair (on Portsmouth) [.

Top 10 conclusions: Manchester United 1-0 Fulham

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1. A disallowed stonewall penalty for the opposition and Fergie prowling the touchline looking at his watch: this was a vintage United performance. 2. You can imagine Roberto Mancini's reaction to Michael Carrick's trip on Danny Murphy. 3. Look at Ryan Giggs putting in the crunching tackles in midfield!

Video: Brazilian player gets bitten by a police dog

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In England, dissent is punishable by a yellow card. But in Brazil you get a police dog's teeth embedded in your thigh instead. That's what happened to Caxias striker Vanderlei at the weekend, at least. Vanderlei and his team-mates were protesting the referee's decision to award a goal to opponents Novo Hamburgo, overruling his linesman's [.

GIF It: Peter Crouch’s incredible volleyed goal over and over again (Stoke City 1-1 Manchester City)

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Peter Crouch proved that Stoke's route one football can be sexy with this wonderstrike against Manchester City at the weekend. The ball didn't touch the ground from the moment is left goalkeeper Asmir Begovic's boot until it bounced around behind the goalline. Fantastic skills from Crouch, who struggled along a tightrope between humility and pride [.

Top 10 conclusions Premier League weekend 24-25 March

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1. Never mind Pray 4 Muamba, Play 4 Muamba seems to be just as powerful. 2. Roberto Mancini doesn't trust himself not to deliver a few choice Kevin Keegan-esque quotes, so he's taking himself away from the post-match interviews. 3. If Manchester City's title challenge is running out of legs they could borrow some of [.

Top 10 conclusions Premier League weekend 24-25 March

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1. Never mind Pray 4 Muamba, Play 4 Muamba seems to be just as powerful. 2. Roberto Mancini doesn't trust himself not to deliver a few choice Kevin Keegan-esque quotes, so he's taking himself away from the post-match interviews. 3. If Manchester City's title challenge is running out of legs they could borrow some of [.

Video: Emotional Bolton huddle ruined by giant lion

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Bolton's players and staff clearly invested a lot in their local derby / relegation six-pointer / Fabrice Muamba support match against Blackburn. All the emotions spilt out at full-time as the Trotters' gathered in a moving post-match huddle. The moment was spoilt slightly by the presence of mascot Lofty the Lion in the middle of [.

GIF It: Franco Di Santo duckfaces Martin Skrtel (Liverpool 1-2 Wigan)

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The relegation dogfight has sent Wigan striker Franco Di Santo a little bit quackers. The Latics man got into a bit of a row with Liverpool defender/Victor Moses' headsman Martin Skrtel. But he soon resolved the matter by giving Skrtel the duck lips. There's no answer to that. Spotted on Pies


Video: Roy Hodgson’s respect for the dead FAIL (West Brom 1-3 Newcastle)

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Before this afternoon's defeat to Newcastle, West Brom announced that they would be wearing black armbands in honour of club legend Ray Barlow, who has passed away at the age of 85. Hidden in the smallprint was that manager Roy Hodgson would be ripping his off and throwing it to the ground in disgust if [.

Video: Rafael Van Der Vaart’s toddler tantrum dissent (Chelsea 0-0 Tottenham)

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Tottenham midfielder Rafael Van Der Vaart showed he had been spending too much time training with five-year-old son Damian by showing some very childish dissent in today's match against Chelsea. After conceding a free-kick, VdV decided to lie on the floor and throw all his limbs around in a fit of tantrum He picked up [.

Spoof: Wigan Athletic follow Real Madrid’s lead – island resort plans announced

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Yesterday, Spanish giants Real Madrid announced plans to create a $1 billion artificial island in the United Arab Emirates. Realising the lucrative prospects of such exotic plans, Wigan responded today with designs for their very own "tropical club experience". According to blueprints released by the club, the ‘DW Wigan Paradise Resort' will be located on a disused [.

Video: Frank Lampard stars in Outnumbered Sport Relief sketch

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Chelsea midfielder Frank Lampard put in a guest appearance in last night's Sport Relief Outnumbered special. Lamps finds himself pitting his wits against the youngest member of the Brockman family, Karen, who is his mascot for a match against Aston Villa. There's even a cameo for closet netball player Howard Webb.

Real Madrid to build $1billion island in the UAE

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Apparently not content with having some of the greatest players in the world, combined with one of the world's most renowned managers and strongest sporting brands, Real Madrid have decided that the time is right to build a luxury holiday resort in the UAE, at a cost of $1billion. The resort, plans for which were [.

Manchester United gets studs-up challenge… from a manager

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Manchester United youngster John Cofie, currently on-loan at Royal Antwerp, was involved in a strange incident when an opposition manager attempted to put a studs-up challenge in on him. Cofie found himself sprinting towards the Tubize dugout to try to keep the ball in play. When he arrived he was greeted by coach Dante Brogno [.

Manchester United loanee gets the boot from opposition coach

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The Belgian second division might not be the place that you expect to hear from on a regular basis, but their was a strange incident on Friday night during the game between Antwerp and Tubize, which Tubize eventually won 3-2. Manchester United loanee John Cofie (isn't that the bloke from the Green Mile?

Video: Scott Parker, Theo Walcott, Glen Johnson and Robert Green take on the Saturday Kitchen Omelette Challenge

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Four England internationals showcased their culinary skills to help raise money for Sport Relief last night. Tottenham's Scott Parker, Arsenal's Theo Walcott, Liverpool's Glen Johnson and West Ham's Robert Green all took part in the Saturday Kitchen Omelette Challenge. No, making an omelette might not usually be associated with the word challenge, but that title [.

Video: Scott Parker, Theo Walcott, Glen Johnson and Robert Green take on the Saturday Kitchen Omelette Challenge

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Four England internationals showcased their culinary skills to help raise money for Sport Relief last night. Tottenham's Scott Parker, Arsenal's Theo Walcott, Liverpool's Glen Johnson and West Ham's Robert Green all took part in the Saturday Kitchen Omelette Challenge. No, making an omelette might not usually be associated with the word challenge, but that title [.

Former Wolves boss Mick McCarthy and George Elokobi set to run a cowboy ranch… in OTP’s imagination only

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There's not been a day gone by since his controversial sacking that OTP hasn't wondered what Mick McCarthy is up to. A man who shirked sassy scarves and manipulative mind games, Mick was a noble no-nonsense bloke for whom we have always held a candle. It's not a sexual thing, but admittedly we would feel nice [.

Video: Wayne Rooney breaks a nine-year-old boy’s wrist (Manchester United 5-0 Wolves)

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Video footage of Wayne Rooney breaking a nine-year-old kid's wrist has emerged. United fan Jamie Thomas has been trawling his plaster cast around the media in recent days after his first trip to watch the Red Devils was spoilt some what by having his wrist broken by a stray Rooney shot during the pre-match warm-up.

Free £50 bet: Chelsea or Tottenham? Arsenal or Aston Villa?

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Free £50 Bet for All New Paddy Power Customers Chelsea v Spurs "‘Arry for England" is a less regular chant at White Hart Lane of late as Spurs have slid out of the title race and are now in danger of sliding right out of the Champions League places. A win for Chelsea will bring [...]


Nova 2010 FC outdo our beloved Madron with a 58-0 defeat

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Remember last season we were rooting for self-styled 'worst team in Britain' Madron FC after they posted a 55-0 defeat? Well, someone has managed to go three better. Nova 2010 FC lost 58-0 to opponents Wheel Power FC at the weekend. We don't know whether to put it down to Cornwall/Devon rivalry, but Torquay-based Nova's [.

Top five moments from Manchester City’s Wind-Up Merchant Executive Patrick Vieira

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Ever since Patrick Vieira was appointed as Manchester City's Football Development Executive, OTP has been telling you that his real job is in fact to wind-up opposing teams. The Frenchman has been busy again. Here's some of his finest work to date. 1. Manchester United (March 2012) "Paul Scholes is a player that I really [.

Bet’s be ‘avin you: Football betting tips for the 24-25 March

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Not a great weekend last time out, adding to my Cheltenham woes, but Manchester United crucifying Wolves provided a decent return on our Asian Handicap bet. In truth, at half-time it looked like you could bet on United winning by more than ten goals an still hope to win your cash. This week we're back [.

The world is watching. A huge weekend for…

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Bolton Wanderers What a horrible week for a football club. The scenes at White Hart Lane made the hairs stand up on the back of your neck. Fans, managers, players and officials united in concern, grief and fear. Four days later, and football has a miracle man, it appears. Fabrice Muamba was clinically dead for [.

Wolves boss Terry Connor in row with Roger Johnson’s wife

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Wolves manager Terry Connor has hit out at Roger Johnson's wife for Twitter comments about his team selection. Melissa Johnson was not best pleased that her husband missed out on a starting spot for last week's thrashing by Manchester United. She tweeted: "Trying to understand why my hubby's on the bench #ridiculous".

Top six controversial footballer autobiography quotes

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The modern day footballer is not an athlete alone. Oh no, he is expected to be all things to all men, including becoming a sportsbook author. OTP salutes some of the (relatively) shocking prose created when our top footballing stars put pen to paper. Here are six examples of when the normally mundane footballer autobiography [.

Manchester City boss Roberto Mancini steals Alex Ferguson’s ‘squeaky bum time’ catchphrase, Yaya Toure doesn’t

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Roberto Mancini nicked the crown jewel of Fergie's post-match phrase weaponry yesterday after his team's exhilarating comeback against Chelsea. Mancini explained to the press that after Gary Cahill's deflected strike gave Roberto Di Matteo's side the lead, the remainder of the high-stakes match "seemed like squeaky bum time".

Wayne Rooney, Theo Walcott, Petr Cech and James Milner ditch football for golf in Tiger Woods 13

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A quartet of Premier League talent has shunned football for golf at least in the virtual world of the Tiger Woods 13 game. The players involved handpicked to put as few noses out of joint as possible are Wayne Rooney, Theo Walcott, Petr Cech and James Milner. EA Sports presumably already had [.

Anton Ferdinand was in the original JLS

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Not content with having a brother that had a TV programme where he 'merked' his fellow international team mates, Anton Ferdinand has revealed that another member of his family could have been responsible for making your ears bleed, by confirming that he could have been a member of boyband JLS, after being best mates with [.

Kitman: Team GB Olympic football kit launched

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The Team GB football kit for London 2012 has been unveiled. In what could be the final nail in the coffin of any lingering hopes of a Euro 2012 call-up, Jack Rodwell fronted the launch. The kit, designed by Stella McCartney, features fairly prominent use of the Union Jack. McCartney said: "The first place to [.

Chelsea star Frank Lampard stars in Outnumbered for Sport Relief

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Frank Lampard has joined the cast of BBC sitcom Outnumbered for a Sport Relief sketch. The full sketch will be broadcast during tomorrow's Sport Relief programmme, but there's a bit of a taster of Lampard's potentially Oscar-winning performance in the video above. Fiancee Christine Bleakley joins the Chelsea midfielder in the sketch.

Neville Southall charges £99 for an hour-long phone call of ‘advice’

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Welsh goalkeeping legend Neville Southall has set up his own website after 'many years of people telling him to get online', the keeper has revealed. The site offers advice to wannabe footballers, and charges an incredible £50 per email and £99 per phone call. His reason for making the site is that 'he cannot be [.

Video: Spanish ref does a Graham Poll (Villarreal 1-1 Real Madrid)

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Real Madrid's 1-1 draw with Villarreal last night was fascinating for a whole load of reasons, not least because it added a bit more doubt to the Spanish title race as Real dropped more points. There were also five red cards shown as Real Madrid lost their discipline following the home side's equaliser.

Video: Liverpool defender Sebastian Coates reminds you of his existence with a spectacular scissor-kick

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szólj hozzá: 8;0-1]b[Matchhighlight.com] We'll be honest: we'd completely forgotten about Sebastian Coates. Liverpool's other Uruguayan has spent more time in the stands than his compatriot and he didn't have to be racist. Still a little way down the pecking order for his preferred centre-back slot, Coates is now making an attempt to oust Andy [.

Video: Liverpool defender Sebastian Coates reminds you of his existence with a spectacular scissor-kick

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szólj hozzá: 8;0-1]b[Matchhighlight.com] We'll be honest: we'd completely forgotten about Sebastian Coates. Liverpool's other Uruguayan has spent more time in the stands than his compatriot and he didn't have to be racist. Still a little way down the pecking order for his preferred centre-back slot, Coates is now making an attempt to oust Andy [.

Top five conclusions: Manchester City 2-1 Chelsea

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1. Carlos Tevez strolled in off the golf course to ensure City didn't end up four strokes behind the leaders in the clubhouse. 2. The faces of the City fans were hilarious at 0-1 down. They've forgotten how to lose properly. 3. Samir Nasri forgot his Pray 4 Muamba t-shirt, and consequently picked up a [.

Fabrice Muamba was ‘dead’ for 78 minutes

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The doctors who treated stricken Bolton midfielder Fabrice Muamba have revealed that he was effectively dead for 78 minutes before responding to treatment and starting his miraculous recovery. Bolton club doctor Jonathan Tobin claimed the 23-year-old's recovery has been "incredible". He said: "It was 48 minutes when he collapsed to reaching hospital and a further [.

Video: Greuther Furth bring on penalty specialist keeper for shootout, but he concedes in the dying seconds of extra-time!

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German side Greuther Furth thought they'd got a great plan: hold Borussia Dortmund to a 0-0 in their German Cup semi-final, then stick a 6ft 6in sub goalie in nets for the penalty shootout and hope for the best. It was all going so well. The match was goalless in the 118th minute when giant [...]


Video: Comercial striker Elionar Bombinha celebrates goal scored by opponents Corinthians

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In the past we've had referees celebrating goals and claiming that it was because they had played a good advantage. But we're not sure what the excuse is for a playing celebrating a goal for the opposition. That's exactly what appears to happen here when Comercial striker Elionar Bombinha celebrates Corinthians successfully converting a penalty [.

Video: Watch all 234 of Lionel Messi’s goals for Barcelona

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You can have too much of most good things in life, but this video might be the exception to that rule. Lionel Messi broke a 60-year-old Barcelona goalscoring record against Granada last night. He reached the milestone in style with a hat-trick, naturally. As if you need reminding, the Argentine star is just 24 years [.

Athletic Bilbao wonder-dribble gets the Ray Hudson orgasmic commentary treatment

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Ray Hudson, do your wonders never cease? The Geordie commentator, who plies his eclectic linguistics on an American sports channel, is a fan of football first and a describer of football matches second. We expect he requires a bib in the gantry given his habit of salivating like a hyena at a barbecue during his [.

OTP Podcast: Episode 30 – Fernando Scorres

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Ep.30 Fernando Scorres by Off The Post on Mixcloud Not for the first time this season, events in the world of football have transcended the sport for the worst possible reasons. Here at the OTP Podcast we are the first to admit our irreverant tone is not best suited to discussing such heartbreaking occurrences, however [.

Video: David James rolls back the years with hilarious own goal (Bristol City 0-2 Watford)

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There was a time when David James' flapping and disastrous ability in the air led to him being called Calamity James. In recent years, including his stint as England's number one, James did plenty to repair his reputation. But it was back to old tricks for the Bristol City keeper in last night's defeat to [.

Crazy Liverpool themed wedding in Singapore

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A couple of Singapore-based Liverpool fans have tied the knot in an incredible Reds-themed wedding ceremony. Henry Han and Eileen Siaw, who met through a Liverpool supporters' club, walked down the aisle to You'll Never Walk Alone. Friends and family donned Liverpool replica kits and held scarves aloft as the Gerry and the Pacemakers hit [.

Crazy Liverpool themed wedding in Singapore

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A couple of Singapore-based Liverpool fans have tied the knot in an incredible Reds-themed wedding ceremony. Henry Han and Eileen Siaw, who met through a Liverpool supporters' club, walked down the aisle to You'll Never Walk Alone. Friends and family donned Liverpool replica kits and held scarves aloft as the Gerry and the Pacemakers hit [.

Fabrice Muamba’s first concern after regaining consciousness: did Bolton lose to Spurs?

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Bolton midfielder Fabrice Muamba wanted to know if his side had lost to Spurs in the FA Cup after regaining consciousness following his cardiac arrest. Family friend Aime Esalo said that Muamba responded to dad Marcel asking if he knew who he was by asking about the match. He told The Sun: "Fabrice said 'Yes' [.

Fabrice Muamba’s first concern after regaining consciousness: did Bolton lose to Spurs?

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Bolton midfielder Fabrice Muamba wanted to know if his side had lost to Spurs in the FA Cup after regaining consciousness following his cardiac arrest. Family friend Aime Esalo said that Muamba responded to dad Marcel asking if he knew who he was by asking about the match. He told The Sun: "Fabrice said 'Yes' [.

Police arrest 10-year-old boy for kick to the head in Hong Kong youth match

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A 10-year-old player of Hong Kong-based English Schools Federation Lions has been arrested by police for kicking an opponent in the head during a match. Footage of the incident shows the youngster lining up what appears to be a big hoof upfield... before opting to clear the skull of a Kitchee Escola player rather than [.

Police arrest 10-year-old boy for kick to the head in Hong Kong youth match

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A 10-year-old player of Hong Kong-based English Schools Federation Lions has been arrested by police for kicking an opponent in the head during a match. Footage of the incident shows the youngster lining up what appears to be a big hoof upfield... before opting to clear the skull of a Kitchee Escola player rather than [.

The Turkish cardiac arrest victim who forgot his goal-scoring exploits

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The horrific scenes at White Hart Lane on Saturday inevitably led to media outlets drawing comparisons between Fabrice Muamba's cardiac arrest and previous incidents of a similar nature. This was done with varying degrees of taste. Of course, Marc Vivien Foe was sadly among most people's immediate thoughts.

Top 5 biggest Premier League games left this season

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With Manchester City hosting a rejuvenated Chelsea side tomorrow night, we look at the games that will decide how the rest of the season pans out. Hold onto your hats, it's going to be a busy two months. 5. Manchester City v Chelsea 21st March Wednesday's game is certainly the first of many hurdles [.

AC Milan adverts try to dish out healthy dose of karma to Mark Van Bommel

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After making a career out of brutal tackles from behind on unsuspecting victims, AC Milan midfielder Mark Van Bommel very nearly got a taste of his own medicine. The Dutchman was attacked by a screen of adverts during an interview at the Italian side's Milanello training ground. He just about got out of the way [.

Random 1990s Footballer Tuesday: #26 Lionel Perez

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Name: Lionel Perez In his 1990s prime for: Sunderland Lowdown: Starting his career at FC Bordeaux, French goalkeeper Perez was a relatively late bloomer, but made a number of appearances for the French giants over a three year period, whilst also being loaned out to Laval and Nimes. In the summer of 1996, Peter Reid [.

Chelsea sack midfielder over smoke grenade

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Chelsea have released youngster Jacob Mellis for setting off a smoke grenade at the club's training ground. The Blues' Cobham base had to be evacuated after Mellis' prank on Friday, March 2. Both Mellis a hotly tipped midfielder who played in last season's Champions League and team-mate Billy Clifford have been suspended since [.

Video: Gary Cahill reveals a Pray 4 Muamba t-shirt (Chelsea v Leicester)

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Chelsea defender Gary Cahill gave one of the most high-profile indications of football's unity in support of his former team-mate Fabrice Muamba. After finding the net in his side's FA Cup victory over Leicester City, Cahill revealed a Pray 4 Muamba t-shirt during his goal celebration. Cahill's efforts were indicative of the way that players [.

Top 10 reasons why Fernando Torres’ Chelsea goal-drought ended

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1. He has been in goalscoring hibernation. He shutdown in October and had no intention of returning to normal duty until spring had sprung. 2. His hair hasn't been blonde enough. The dry spell is down to his hair colourist, who has kept his hair far too dark since he arrived at Stamford Bridge. Nando [.

Video: Bayern Munich duo Franck Ribery and Toni Kroos settle free-kick duties with Rock, Paper, Scissors

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Playground rules once again infiltrated top-flight football at the weekend with Bayern Munich team-mates Franck Ribery and Toni Kroos playing Rock, Paper, Scissors to decide who would take a free-kick. During their 6-0 thrashing of Hertha Berlin, the pair used the schoolyard game to end their squabble.

Top five conclusions Premier League weekend 17-18 March

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Wolves v Man Utd by Phentore01 1. Manchester United took the opportunity of rivals City having the weekend off to close the goal difference gap. 2. Another defeat and more evidence that Terry Goner is on a hiding to nothing at Wolves. 3. Papiss Cisse has decided that if Usain Bolt can pretend to be [.

Fulham manager Martin Jol blows the lid on the cheating that will keep Swansea in the Premier League

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Fulham boss Martin Jol has revealed the secret behind Swansea's incredibly effective possession football: they have an extra man on the pitch. Speaking after his side's 3-0 home defeat to the Swans, the Dutchman spoke of his frustration at chasing the game against Brendan Rodgers' bunch of cheats. Jol told Match of the Day that [.

Spoof: ‘Peekaboo Drogba’ toy doll set to be Christmas bestseller

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With just 282 shopping days left until Christmas, the nation's toy industry is understandably abuzz with predictions of the top-seller's for the annual festive season.  Along with the usual assortment of puzzles, computer consoles and superhero figurines has come a late entry on to the market: a ‘Peekaboo Drogba' Doll inspired by Chelsea striker [.

Italian striker deliberately misses penalty after dive

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Many readers will remember Robbie Fowler's deliberately missed penalty for Liverpool, but Robbie made the crucial mistake of hitting his penalty on target, meaning that Jamie Redknapp could smash home the rebound to still provide his side with a goal. Vittorio Esposito, of Italian amateur side Termoli, went one better when he had dived to [.

GIF It: Chelsea’s Didier Drogba v Angry Birds

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Didier's dive can't have made Napoli very 'appy. Here it is with an Angry Birds reworking. Via Feint Zebra


Is Manchester City boss Roberto Mancini ruining his chances of a sacking pay-off?

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For now Roberto Mancini is still revered by the Manchester City faithful, but there are some pundits predicted that the Italian will be axed if he fails to win the Premier League this season. If City's owners are about to suffer a fit of Abramovich-style itchy trigger, they might be able to save themselves the [.

The world is watching. A huge weekend for…

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Wigan The point gained at Carrow Road was valuable, but not necessarily sufficient. They have the fewest points and the fewest goals in the country, and are still to play Chelsea, Liverpool, Manchester United and Arsenal. Before that run of games is West Brom at home this weekend, but Wigan have their work cut out: [.

Top five conclusions: Athletic Bilbao 2-1 Manchester United (5-3 on agg)

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1. How the mighty have fallen. United exited European competition last season after being out-played by football deities Barcelona in the Champions League final. This season Sir Alex's men were dumped out of the last 16 of the Europa League by seventh-placed La Liga side Athletic Bilbao. 2. Despite that low league position – a clear [.

Top five conclusions: Manchester City 3-2 Sporting Lisbon (3-3 on agg)

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Manchester City 3-2 Sporting CP footyroom.com by footyroom 1. Unlike Arsenal's fightback against AC Milan, this cannot be termed a glorious failure. City stayed in first gear longer than a learner driver on a 5mph country road. While Arsenal blitzed Milan from the first whistle, City only rose from their self-inflicted coma with 30 minutes to [.

Video: Joe Hart nearly scores a late winner (Manchester City 3-2 Sporting Lisbon)

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Manchester City were edged out of the Europa League on away goals last night, but they came so close to pipping Sporting Lisbon in the most spectacular fashion possible. Goalkeeper Joe Hart was inches away from giving City a last-gasp goal, which would have been enough to see them through to the next round.

Bet’s be ‘avin you: Football betting tips for the 17-18 March

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Welcome back, my friends, and if you can still afford anything after a few days of Cheltenham Festival gambling, then why not get on board with some football bets for the weekend? Or alternatively, if you lost nearly all your money at Cheltenham, then you should definitely use what little you have left on the [.

John Terry provides former Chelsea manager Andre Villas Boas with useful evidence for a constructive dismissal case

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Who said that the Chelsea dressing room is run by the senior players? On the day of their match against Napoli, captain John Terry was quoted as saying: "As for the senior players running this football club, that's nonsense. That's just the perception from outside. Roman [Abramovich] and the board make the decisions.

John Terry provides former Chelsea manager Andre Villas Boas with useful evidence for a constructive dismissal case

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Who said that the Chelsea dressing room is run by the senior players? On the day of their match against Napoli, captain John Terry was quoted as saying: "As for the senior players running this football club, that's nonsense. That's just the perception from outside. Roman [Abramovich] and the board make the decisions.

Video: Israeli goalkeeper achieves hat-trick of howlers, gets subbed at half-time

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8VIt0CQbFaU Did you happen to catch the league game in Romania between Concordia Chijana and Visalani on Saturday night? If not, you missed out primarily on a masterclass of calamitous keeping that makes Massimo Taibi's time at Manchester United look like a reign of consummate composure.

Top five conclusions: Chelsea 4-1 Napoli

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Chelsea 4 Nápoles 1 by jordixana 1. At 3-1 up, the scoresheet was looking distinctly similar to the inscription on Andre Villas Boas' headstone. 2. If AVB had been going for tough love with his team selection for the first-leg, Di Matteo's response at the final whistle was just love. He was practically dry humping [.

Video: Premier League chairman Dave Richards falls into a water fountain while fully-clothed

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Dave Richards caused a bit of a stir yesterday with comments he made at a conference in Qatar. If his controversial views were likely to cause embarrassment for the Premier League, he ensured that he personally was even more red-faced by falling into a water fountain. The suited and booted Premier League chairman failed to [.

Video: Fernando Torres is not particularly excited by Chelsea beating Napoli, Roberto Di Matteo is

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Fernando Torres looked a bit sharper than in recent months during Chelsea's victory over Napoli last night... but he was still nonplussed by the win. The Spaniard seemed happy to trudge off the pitch at the end of extra-time at Stamford Bridge. But interim manager Roberto Di Matteo had other ideas. Spotting his prey, Di [.

GIF It: Peekaboo with diving Didier Drogba (Chelsea 4-1 Napoli)

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There was a time when Chelsea striker Didier Drogba thought Barcelona's methods of progressing in the Champions League were a "f**king disgrace". But it now appears that he's learnt something from Barca midfielder Sergio Busquets. Drog took a tumble, clutching his face, after a flailing hand from Napoli's Salvatore Aronica brushed his chest.

Video: Roberto Di Matteo’s comedy goal celebration slip (Chelsea 4-1 Napoli)

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Bobby Di Matteo is falling over himself to get the Chelsea job on a permanent basis. The Blues' interim boss enjoyed a comedy fall as he celebrated the first goal in Chelsea's 4-1 win over Napoli last night, which saw them progress to the Champions League quarter finals 5-4 on aggregate. He needs a pair [.

Joey Barton threatens to release deadly animals on squatters in his new London home

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Might go to nearest pet shop and purchase 20 tarantulas, 20 snakes and as many rat as I can get my hands on, pop them through letter box... Joseph Barton (@Joey7Barton) March 14, 2012 Joey Barton has taken to Twitter to reveal that a group of "heroin riddled" squatters have moved into the empty [..

Spoof: QPR confirm Derek Acorah signing

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QPR last night completed the signing of exorcist Derek Acorah after defender Clint Hill revealed he had been haunted by his ‘ghost' goal. The veteran player was denied a first Premier League goal at the weekend after officials failed to see that his header had crossed the line in QPR's match-up with Bolton.

Non league game abandoned after referee is stung by bee

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A Ryman League Division match between Whyteleafe and Hythe Town had to be abandoned after the referee was stung by a bee in and collapsed. Referee Ashley Slaughter fell to the floor and had to be treated for half an hour by the Hythe physio. After he failed to respond to treatment the game was [...]


OTP Podcast: Episode 29 – Haunted Hoops

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Down to the bare bones Ep.29 Haunted Hoops by Off The Post on Mixcloud With the unfortunate Clint Hill denied a certain goal at the weekend, the Pod looks at the unsightly event that is set to rumble on in QPR's stomachs like an uncooked curry. While some analysts went for the insightful technology debate [.

Video: Tottenham star Rafael van der Vaart’s son Damian is following in dad’s footsteps

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Rafael Van Der Vaart's five-year-old son Damian is showing signs that he's inherited his dad's football skills. The Tottenham midfielder posted a video on Twitter of Damian being put through his paces at the North London club's training ground. The Dutchman tweeted: "Proud of my son, already playing like a champion at Spurs training!

Video: Victor Anichebe’s magic act still needs some work (Liverpool 3-0 Everton)

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It wasn't so much a disappearing act as a gradual folding up as Everton striker Victor Anichebe went over the advertising hoardings during last night's Merseyside derby defeat to the Steven Gerrard XI. The big striker found himself nestled in an Anichebe-sized gap between the hoardings and the Liverpool fans.

Video: Victor Anichebe’s magic act still needs some work (Liverpool 3-0 Everton)

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It wasn't so much a disappearing act as a gradual folding up as Everton striker Victor Anichebe went over the advertising hoardings during last night's Merseyside derby defeat to the Steven Gerrard XI. The big striker found himself nestled in an Anichebe-sized gap between the hoardings and the Liverpool fans.

Spoof: Film industry to sue Liverpool’s Charlie Adam for wayward ‘Hollywood balls’

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The world's biggest film studios – including Universal, Warner Brothers and Fox – have released a joint statement today revealing that they will be suing Liverpool midfielder Charlie Adam for defamation of the film industry's character. The studios are seeking compensation totalling $36 million over the Scot's persistent use of the ‘Hollywood ball' long [.

Random 1990s Footballer Tuesday: #25 Christopher Wreh

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Name: Christopher Wreh In his 1990s prime for: Arsenal Lowdown: After starting his career in his homeland of Liberia with the comically named La Modelle International and Invincible Eleven, Wreh was signed by Arsene Wenger for Monaco in 1993. After a loan at Guingamp, where he played in the 1997 Coupe de France final, Wreh [.

Video: Robin Van Persie and Tim Krul clash, Gary Neville dodges hypocrisy (Arsenal 2-1 Newcastle)

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Holland laid the foundations for a Euro 2012 implosion as international team-mates Robin Van Persie and Tim Krul clashed during last night's match between Arsenal and Newcastle. The row seemed to start over the Magpies keeper taking his time over clearances and goal-kicks. Arsenal skipper Van Persie took to standing in front of Krul, and [.

Charity auction winner offers to donate training session with Didier Drogba to Fernando Torres

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The winning bidder in an auction for a training session with Didier Drogba has offered to donate the prize to the player's misfiring Chelsea team-mate Fernando Torres. The lot was up for grabs at the Didier Drogba Foundation charity ball on Sunday evening. The highest bidder shelled out £15,000 to secure the training session with [.

Top 10 most ludicrous disallowed goals

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QPR's Clint Hill starts the week haunted by the 'ghost goal' he scored against Bolton at the weekend. With the game on a knife-edge at 0-0, Hill awaiting his very first Premier League goal and relegation-bound QPR desperate for points, the disallowed strike could not have been a much more painful experience.

GIF It: The crying Manchester City fan

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OTP can only assume that this bloke had suffered some sort of trauma in his personal life over the last few days, because bawling your eyes out at being 1-0 down to Swansea with six minutes to play seems a bit over the top.


Top 10 conclusions Premier League weekend 10-11 March

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1. Don't wait for OTP to write this conclusion. Don't wait for OTP. Don't wait for OTP. [The Joe Hart Honorary Conclusion] 2. But Hart ultimately lost his game of Swanupmanship thanks to Premier League legend Luke Moore. 3. Clint Hill thinks he got off pretty lightly. Usually when the QPR man crosses the line, [.

Video: Luiz Adriano’s incredible one-yard open goal miss (Shakhtar Donetsk v Illichevits)

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The Ukrainian league served up a spectacular miss at the weekend thanks to Shakhtar Donetsk's Brazilian star Luiz Adriano. The 24-year-old had the goal at his mercy, finding himself one yard out with the goalkeeper stranded in the middle of nowhere at his near post. Somehow the striker managed to clear the crossbar with his [.

Clint Hill disallowed goal re-opens goalline technology debate

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Another weekend, another argument for the introduction of technology to jusge definitively whether the ball has crossed the line. Ina game that could have a significant bearing on the battle for survival in the Premier League, QPR defender Clint Hill headed a Joey Barton corner beyond Adam Bogdan. The goalkeeper managed to claw it up [.

Polish under-8s game abandoned due to crowd trouble

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With the Euro 2012 tournament coming ever closer, one of the largest worries of hosting the World Cup in Eastern Europe is the issue of widespread hooliganism. And the problem does not look set to disappear given that a child's Lech Poznan game in Poland had to be abandoned by the referee after a great [.

FREE £50 bet: Are you backing Di Matteo’s Chelsea? Will Spurs stop their slump?

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Click Here for a Free £50 Bet for All New Paddy Power Customers Chelsea v Stoke Well, at least Andre Villas-Boas can watch a Chelsea game without the fear of being sacked this weekend. He probably won't though. The question will then be whether the Chelsea players can rally around Roberto Di Matteo to get [.

Top five conclusions: Manchester United 2-3 Athletic Bilbao

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1. Sure, you can stick to the letter of the law and say that Patrice Evra committed a foul by playing in his socks, but how would Athletic Bilbao fans feel if the boot was on the other foot? 2. Howard Webb's 25th anniversary present to Sir Alex Ferguson finally turned up then. He didn't [...]


Bet’s be ‘avin you: Football betting tips for the 10-11 March

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A lovely week of betting last week. I gave you £70 worth of tips and it returned £137. It would have been £254 but for Birmingham chucking away a two goal lead against Derby at home, but you can't be greedy I guess, and Michael Chopra certainly did the job, with him opening the scoring [...]


The world is watching. A huge weekend for…

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Roberto Di Matteo Rather like Steve Kean at Blackburn earlier in the season, you rather feel for Di Matteo. Although he is woefully under-qualified for the position he currently holds, that is through no fault of his own. Mr Abramovich has trusted him in the hotseat at the Bridge, and there is nothing Bobby can [.

Video: Man Utd boss Sir Alex Ferguson gets an electronic scoreboard inflicted metatarsal injury

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We've already had a laugh at Fergie getting his hands on his favourite new toy. But this is the moment the situation soured, as the Manchester United manager had the electronic scoreboard dropped on his foot. It was quite clear to see that the unwieldy Uefa kit packs a punch and Fergie's pain was clear [.

A dream come true for Sir Alex Ferguson (Manchester United v Athletic Bilbao)

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A foolproof way to control the amount of injury time at last. Watch-tapping is so last season.


Juan Mata grasses up Chelsea team-mate Fernando Torres over penalty refusal

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Chelsea star Juan Mata has revealed he put the chance for Fernando Torres to end his goal drought on a plate this week and his fellow Spaniard turned it down. Mata claims he gave Torres first dibs on a penalty against Birmingham on Tuesday evening, but the goal-shy striker refused to take it. He [.

Pep Guardiola loves Barcelona football (even when it’s being played by the opposition)

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Barcelona manager Pep Guardiola lives for beautiful goals. So much so that he can appreciate a great goal being scored against his team. Granted, humility comes a lot more easily when you're 10-1 up on aggregate. Nonetheless, Guardiola was visibly impressed by Karim Bellarabi's late consolation for Bayer Leverkusen.

Five-goal Lionel Messi breaks a Champions League record (Barcelona 7-1 Bayer Leverkusen)

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Barcelona superstar Lionel Messi made Champions League history last night by becoming the first player to score five goals in a match. The Argentine led the attack as Barca thumped German side Bayer Leverkusen 7-1 on the night. Messi bagged five of the goals for himself as Bayer struggled to cope with the little magician.

Did Manchester City boss Roberto Mancini spur on Lionel Messi’s five-goal haul?

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Bayer Leverkusen might just have to blame Roberto Mancini for their thrashing by Barcelona last night. It's possible that Lionel Messi's five-star performance was inspired by the Manchester City manager. Mancini says: "I think Van Persie at this moment is one of the best strikers in Europe with [Lionel] Messi, [Cristiano] Ronaldo, Sergio [Aguero] and [.

APOEL Nicosia qualify for the Champions League Quarter-Finals

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Whilst there was the assumption last night that Lionel Messi's five goals against Bayer Leverkusen was the greatest performance in Champions League history, it could be argued that it wasn't even the most impressive display of the night. Step forward APOEL Nicosia, who beat French giants Lyon on penalties to qualify for the quarter-finals of [.

Who vomited on the Arsenal bench?

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There's no doubt that Arsenal's near-miss in their attempts to perform the improbable against AC Milan was a nervy affair, but it appeared the excitement got too much for someone on the Arsenal bench. Arsene Wenger is used to being flanked by Pat Rice, but last night he also seemed to have mushed up dinner, [.

Who vomited on the Arsenal bench?

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There's no doubt that Arsenal's near-miss in their attempts to perform the improbable against AC Milan was a nervy affair, but it appeared the excitement got too much for someone on the Arsenal bench. Arsene Wenger is used to being flanked by Pat Rice, but last night he also seemed to have mushed up dinner, [.

OTP Podcast: Episode 28 – Andre’s Very Brief

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Ep.28 Andre's Very Brief by Off The Post on Mixcloud It was all business as usual in the Premier League this week – Chelsea sacked a manager, Robin van Persie notched up a couple more goals, and Lee Cattermole somehow managed to pick up a booking and also a straight red in the same game. [...]


Top five conclusions: Arsenal 3-0 AC Milan

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Arsenal 3-0 AC Milan footyroom.com by footyroom 1. That must have been more galling for Gooners than if their side had bowed out tamely as expected. So close and yet so far. 2. Nobody does celebrations quite like Wojciech Sczcesny. 3. There is no more lethargic sight in football than Robinho and Zlatan Ibrahimovich believing [.

Video: Carlos Tevez scores for Manchester City reserves

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Good new for Manchester City fans: Carlos Tevez hasn't forgotten how to score. The Argentine found the net for the first time since returning from his extended leave in a reserve match against Bolton Wanderers yesterday evening. He bundled the ball in from close range after a cross from winger Harry Bunn on 51 minutes.

Top 10 own goals walloped in from outside the box

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OTP not only likes to have a good laugh at monumental bloopers, we like to deconstruct the inadvertent art and beauty that goes in to them. Even before Jamie Carragher was born, own goals were a key construct of the game and can be assessed on their technical difficulty, match-context and aesthetic quality.

Premier League Name Translator: Paul Gravedigger

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Cutting through the exotic monikers of Premier League imports Apparently, this Premier League name is so menacing that it's meaning is implied. The first part of the surname refers to burial. Although the translation isn't exact, if you've got burying in your surname you ancestors must have been doing some digging for a living and [.

Gregg Wylde: Rangers saviour or man who spotted money-spinning free transfer to England?

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Rangers youngster Gregg Wylde has become the first player to leave the club as administrators Duff and Phelps look to cut the Ibrox wage bill. The midfielder has left without a pay-off after his offer to take voluntary redundancy was accepted. The 20-year-old has painted the decision as a pretty selfless one.

Seriously injured Belgian player Julien Lecompte sent off for diving

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Now, here at OTP we want to remove diving/simulation/cheating from our game as much as anyone. Anything that tarnishes the reputation of the beautiful game must be eradicated, and villains treated with the heavy-handed arm of the football law. However, it does appear that referees can often go too far.

Random 1990s Footballer Tuesday: #24 Justin Edinburgh

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Name: Justin Edinburgh In his 1990s prime for: Tottenham Hotspur Lowdown: A left back by trade, Edinburgh began his career at Southend United but soon moved to Spurs in 1990 for £150,000. It was a transfer that saw Edinburgh move up three divisions, and clearly showed his potential. Edinburgh became a mainstay of [.

Divine intervention – Football Focus fire alarm cuts off Martin Keown mid-sentence

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We knew the Tyne and Wear derby would be a hell-raising affair, but not so fiery that a mere pre-match discussion of the dual would set off the fire alarm. That appeared to be the case in the Football Focus studio in Salford on Saturday as a loud fire siren did the right thing and [...]


Top 10 conclusions Premier League weekend 3-4 March

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1. AVB's record of just 19 wins in 40 games was clearly too much to stomach for a club with such astronomical aspirations and confetti budgets. Much more sickening has been the woeful behaviour of the players under his charge. If you can't play for your manager, at least have the pride to play [...

Top 10 conclusions Premier League weekend 3-4 March

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1. AVB's record of just 19 wins in 40 games was clearly too much to stomach for a club with such astronomical aspirations and confetti budgets. Much more sickening has been the woeful behaviour of the players under his charge. If you can't play for your manager, at least have the pride to play [...

10 reasons why Fulham’s Pavel Pogrebnyak is primed for cult-hero status

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A few January loan deals have come good of late – Ryo Myaichi at Bolton, Royston Drenthe at Everton and Sid the Squirrel at QPR. There is however one loan signing that has quickly earned an especially warm place in OTP's heart. His name? Pavel Pogrebnyak he of 5 goals in his first 3 [...]


10 reasons why Fulham’s Pavel Pogrebnyak is primed for cult-hero status

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A few January loan deals have come good of late – Ryo Myaichi at Bolton, Royston Drenthe at Everton and Sid the Squirrel at QPR. There is however one loan signing that has quickly earned an especially warm place in OTP's heart. His name? Pavel Pogrebnyak he of 5 goals in his first 3 [...]


Manchester City mix-up: BBC reporter confuses Roberto Mancini with Mario Balotelli

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It is an easy mistake to make. A lot is made of the father-son relationship between Roberto Mancini and Mario Balotelli, which perhaps explains why Match of the Day reporter Damian Johnson got the two confused on Saturday. Johnson thought he was talking to the 'son' when he was actually with the 'dad'.

Manchester City mix-up: BBC reporter confuses Roberto Mancini with Mario Balotelli

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It is an easy mistake to make. A lot is made of the father-son relationship between Roberto Mancini and Mario Balotelli, which perhaps explains why Match of the Day reporter Damian Johnson got the two confused on Saturday. Johnson thought he was talking to the 'son' when he was actually with the 'dad'.

Andre Villas-Boas sacked by Chelsea

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The worst kept secret in the Premier League has been let out the bag. Despite announcing that AVB would still be at the club in three years in time only a month ago, Roman Abramovich has moved to sack manager Andre Villas-Boas after only seven months in charge. AVB had a torrid time at Chelsea, [...]


Miroslav Stoch scores a wonder volley for Fenerbache

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With the woes occuring at Stamford Bridge, especially their problem in scoring goals, will Chelsea be ruing the decision to let Miroslav Stoch join Fenerbache in the summer of 2010? Stoch is running something of his own Goal of the Season competition, with four screamers in the last few months. His latest came in Fenerbache's [.

Wojciech Szczesny’s massive double save against Liverpool

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When Luis Suarez went down a touch 'theatrically', shall we say, it looked like Liverpool were going to draw first blood against Arsenal. When Dirk Kuyt had his penalty saved by Szczesny, it looked like Liverpool were going to draw first blood against Arsenal When the ball was ten centimetres from crossing the line, it [.

Hulk scores screamer to help Porto win O Classico

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His release clause might be ridiculously high, and there still may be an educated train of thought that he hasn't proved himself enough yet on the biggest stage, but Hulk showed Europe (and maybe Chelsea fans) exactly how talented he is last night with the opener in Porto's match against Benfica, Portugal's O Classico.

The world is watching. A huge weekend for…

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Arsenal A tremendous achievement in their resilience last weekend, but the fact remains that Arsenal fans have experienced potential redemption already this season, only to have that hope cruelly removed by further inept displays. This weekend sees the Gunners travel to Anfield in Sky's Saturday lunchtime game.

Free £50 bet: Are you backing Spurs or Man Utd? Liverpool or Arsenal?

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Click Here to Get a Free £50 Bet for All New Paddy Power Tottenham v Man United Thanks to the Old Trafford medical staff finding a miracle cure to Wayne Rooney's case of "I'm not risking getting injured in a meaningless midweek friendly at this point in the domestic season", the United striker is certain to [.

Bet’s be ‘avin you: Football betting tips for the 3-4 March

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The column has a distinctly domestic feel this week, with all our bets focussing on the English and Scottish leagues. I also return to the Championship for a treble. I know it does me (and my wallet) harm, but like a junkie warming up another piece of tin foil, I can't get away from my [...]


The official 2012 Olympic match-ball is pink and has a bubbly personality

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Yesterday, Olympic officials launched the brand spanking new ball set to be peppered around by David Beckham and various pre-pubescent teenagers at the London 2012 Games. It is called ‘The Albert,' a title based on the cockney rhyming slang for a football Albert Hall. It's either that justification or a veiled championing of pierced genitalia.

Top six tree-based pitch invasions

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There is no way Tony Yeboah could have done a 'Yeboah' on a field of gravel and the Cruyff turn just doesn't look as majestic in a sandpit. In sum, plant-life is the ultimate unsung hero in football. It is quite literally stepped all over without a peep of retaliation, while delivering a surface to [.

Spoof: The FA invent fourth place trophy at Wenger’s request

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The FA today publicly unveiled a new trophy to be awarded to the fourth placed finisher in this season's Premier League. The controversial announcement came just one week after Arsenal manager Arsene Wenger reacted to criticisms of his lack of silverware by suggesting that coming fourth was a ‘trophy' in itself.

Five reasons why Stuart Pearce didn’t celebrate England’s equaliser

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Stuart Pearce had more cameras trained on him than a Big Brother contestant committing homicide last night as the former international took the reins of the England caretaker position. Other than a super trendy haircut (lacking on the sides, just like England's wing-play), there was one remarkable piece of footage that has peaked OTP's interest.

Newcastle fan gets a letter from the Mayor of Milan confirming no Sunderland fans have been seen there

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The Mayor of Milan has written to an enterprising Newcastle fan to confirm that a Mackem has never been seen in the Italian city. Twitter user iwantcurlyhair2 wrote to the Comune di Milano asking whether a Sunderland native had ever been seen in the vicinity. And it turns out that they haven't. The letter relates [.

Top five conclusions: England 2-3 Holland

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1. On that short evidence we can deduce that Stuart Pearce's England would involve the same end result but with a dash more heroic defiance along the way. 2. Talk about conforming to national stereotypes. Klaas Jan Huntelaar is waking up with a sore head this morning after consuming too much grass last night.

Video: Marc Janko scores with his penis (Austria v Finland)

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Austria striker Marc Janko suffered mixed emotions after finding the net against Finland last night. The Porto man fired the ball past Finland keeper Lucas Hradecky using only his World Cup Willy. Janko charged down Hradecky's clearance after a backpass. The sickening feeling he experienced was soon lifted by the joy of watching the ball [.

Maccabi Haifa goalkeeper scores own goal from goal kick

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Ahead of Israel's friendly with Ukraine, Maccabi Haifa hosted their Ukranian counterparts Dynamo Kiev in a 60 minute friendly played in the strongest winds seen for some time. The wind was so strong that when Haifa keeper Assaf Mendes took a goal kick, the ball held in the air before blowing back into his own [.

Did Peter Taylor’s Bahrain get involved in a spot of match fixing?

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While Europe was playing out a round of friendly matches, the rest of the world was partaking in a series of World Cup qualification matches, and in the Asia region, qualification from the group stages was being finalised. Bahrain, managed by Peter Taylor, needed to enact a nine goal swing on Qatar and hope Qatar [.

GIF It: Klaas Jan Huntelaar’s grassy KO

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Last night we brought you the photo of Klaas Jan Huntelaar eating grass (the eyes follow you). Now the gang at 101GG have tracked down the GIF version, complete with attempts to get the striker to part with his mouthful of Wembley turf.