Off the Post Archives for January 2010

Avram Grant was the Premier League manager who visited Thai brothel

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Portsmouth boss named as the secret massage fan Portsmouth manager Avram Grant has been named by The Sun as the Premier League manager they claimed had been caught visiting a brothel last December. The tabloid had been banned from naming the manager involved because of a so-called "super-injunction".

Video: Akon leads cheesy World Cup 2010 anthem

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This is Akon performing the official 2010 World Cup anthem Oh Africa with a little help from his friends Fernando Torres and Didier Drogba. The Liverpool and Chelsea striker blast football-sized paintballs onto a wall to create a mural of football's elite. Just a few of issues we have: 1. England's flag is not the Union Jack.

Premier League Name Translator: #9 Alexander Diamond

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Cutting through the exotic monikers of Premier League imports so you can judge the player, not the name This is precisely the reason why OTP has set up the Premier League Name Translator. West Ham splash out a reported £6 million to bring in an Alexander Diamond from Livorno when they could have got one from [.

Nouveau cliche: Untenable

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Our position of listening to you trot out the same generic excuse has become untenable OTP reader Ben Marlow is pining for a time when footballing folk gave half-decent excuses for their high profile fall-outs instead of reverting to lawyer speak. Ben said: "Reading the recent stories about Peter Storrie, Avram, that West Ham bloke, and anyone [.

Premier League Name Translator: #8 Joy of War Lucky

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Cutting through the exotic monikers of Premier League imports so you can judge the player, not the name If Arsenal have been accused of a lack of fight in recent times, they might like to recall their loaned out goalkeeper whose name suggested not only an abundance of fighting spirit but a love of war.

Video: John Terry - He Cheated

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JT gets the Jacko treatment Any song that contains the lyric, "He used to meet her at the Hilton Hotel, while Wayne was playing one-twos with Darius Vassell" is OK by us, and this one does! Michael Jackson's Beat It has been reworked to give it a distinctly topical vibe!

Video: Robinho finds his calling… as a rapper

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If only that much emotion had gone into his City performances Manchester City flop Robinho touched down in Brazil for his loan move to Santos and his new club couldn't wait to put him through his paces. As a rapper, that is. At his unveiling ceremony, Robinho was accompanied by Pele before duetting with a chubby white [.

Top four worst transfer window moves

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Which players and club have made bad decisions this January? 1. Robbie Keane to Celtic It is only a loan move and Keane's frustration at a lack of starts for Tottenham is understandable, but generally his career has been on an upwards curve since leaving Liverpool last January while the standard of the SPL continues an a [.

Premier League Name Translator: #7 Illustrious Bronze Moon

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Cutting through the exotic monikers of Premier League imports so you can judge the player, not the name Stoke's token luxury player has a luxury name to match. OTP reader Can Ozmen has very kindly offered up this translation. He jokes: "Fitting name for an Apache leader, isn't it?" Quite, although Big Chief Sittingonthebench might be more [.

Premier League Name Translator: #6 Richard Oak

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Cutting through the exotic monikers of Premier League imports so you can judge the player, not the name Every top of the table Premier League team should have a strong tree of a defender at the heart of its defence, and it turns out Chelsea do. That's if OTP's Premier League Name Translator is anything to [.

Facebook event set up for Arsenal title hopes funeral

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Are Gunners dead and buried? After Arsenal's defeat to Manchester United yesterday, cheeky Chelsea fans have set-up a Facebook event marking a funeral for the Gunners' title ambitions. Unsurprisingly, the wake is to be held at Stamford Bridge next Sunday when the two sides meet. Optimistic Gooners might suggest that the funeral plans should be put on [.

Video: Stephen Hunt’s assist / magical disappearing act

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Now you see him... When you make a mistake like needlessly keeping the ball in play allowing the opposition to score, sometimes you want the ground to swallow you up. Or the advertising hoardings. Hull's Stephen Hunt got the latter against his potential new club Wolves. The Republic of Ireland international neatly backheeled the ball to set-up [.

No.1 Fan all singing, all dancing footie fan competition winners

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And the winners are... Thanks to everyone who entered the competition to win one of four No.1 Fan figurines. 23cm high fans are dancing their way to Lee Warren, Jonathan Kamer, Mike Kokins and Rob Ludgate If you haven't been lucky enough to win, you can visit the No.1 Fan site to buy one. [...

Top 10 conclusions Premier League weekend 30-31 January

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1. Considering Arsene Wenger is generally acknowledged as a cerebral manager, he is probably wondering how he managed to fall for the same trick twice. Take a bow, Fergie. 2. Money can buy happiness. Just conduct a quick poll of Manchester City and Portsmouth fans/players after yesterday's clash. 3. It was almost a given that John Terry's [.

‘Do Are Ya? Mohamed Zidan’s crazy new hairdo

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Love = Football. Haircut nearly = nasty head injury Not content with providing all the kits for the tournament, Puma decided they were missing an advertising trick by not using Mohamed Zidan's head as promotion. This was rectified in time for yesterday's African Cup of Nations victory over Ghana. A gentleman with a razor blade was let [.