I see Nike is outsourcing to Garanimals once again. It probably looks better in real life than it does on the web page...actually, it looks like the sort of thing the bad guys in "Meatballs" would wear while yachting. Putting "Don't Tread On Me" in the collar totally makes up for it, though. I know, it's [. Click to continue reading...

I probably shouldn't stick my neck out like this, because the group in question might not have updated its website. Still, if Carbon Trust really is trying to use Beckham for publicity, you'd think he'd show up on their home page. Or their search results. Or in their press releases. I have no trouble believing Beckham is about [. Click to continue reading...

In these enlightened times, strolling onto BigSoccer and starting a thread about promotion and relegation earns you scorn and mockery. This hasn't stopped playtherapy over at Nutmegged, who quotes "The Beautiful Game and the American Exception." I was also reading and massively enjoying David Goldblatt's "The Ball Is Round: A History of Soccer", and noted [. Click to continue reading...

Fixture congestion for above-average MLS clubs is going to get worse before it gets better, thanks to CONCACAF's response to the successes of Ligas Super y Inter. The CONCACAF Champions Cup is now the CONCACAF Champions League. More teams, more games, more decisions. Click to continue reading...

A last minute goal by surprise-to-me guest Joy Fawcett off a Mia assist won the game in a thrilling 13-12 defensive struggle. Click to continue reading...

The only real enemy in tomorrow's Mia Hamm Foundation charity game is bone marrow patients...wait, that's not right. And it's a vague ripoff of an old "Home Movies" joke. More information is available at the game's Myspace page. Wait, the game's MYSPACE page? Jesus wept. Click to continue reading...

Eddie Johnson Fulham blah blah. There's no way you're reading this story here first. Click to continue reading...

Here are the bios of the players up for the Writers Were Too Stupid Too Recognize Their Greatness award. Click to continue reading...

I was going to reserve comment on the Benny to MLS and/or Israel rumors, but I do want to say this. I would have to see Feilhaber smack into a glass sliding door repeatedly, like a parakeet, before I would believe that he isn't good enough for Derby Freaking Propping Up The Table County. And perhaps this [. Click to continue reading...

My good buddy Reverend Paul is even more OG than I am. If you were watching the Nats before the existence of Sam's Army(TM), then you've seriously got some historical perspective. So there we were on Saturday, and just about the only thing we could talk about was how weird it was to see so [...] Click to continue reading...

In this week's USSoccerPlayers.com column, I report that the United States defeated Sweden two goals to zero. Focused mostly on the on-field stuff, rather than - well, okay. Press conference after the game.  Maximum Bob and Landon are, for whatever reason, showing about as much emotion as financial planning commercial. Click to continue reading...

Kenn told me columnists usually have to overstate their case to be heard, so, yeah. My reaction when Kenn told me, by the way: Kenn: "You know Wynalda's been whacked? DL: "What?" Kenn: "O'Brien, too." DL: "...you mean murdered?" Kenn: "No, I mean they got fired, you dumbass." Some enterprising club who don't have an announce team yet (San Jose, Seattle*) or one [. Click to continue reading...

#1 overall pick Chance Myers, from California-Los Angeles. I guess that's easier to type than "UCLA." Thus concludes everything I have to say about the 2008 Superdraft, for the next five years or so. Someone's gonna look smart, someone's gonna look stupid, and everything is as it should be in this, the best of all possible worlds. Click to continue reading...

Beige. Wait, or is that supposed to be gold? Gold would make sense, if the color scheme was designed expecting a team wearing red, white, blue and gold to win the World Cup a few months ago. There was a team with those colors, but I don't think you've ever heard of them. Most of what [...] Click to continue reading...

With the arrival of the Superdraft, the Supplemental Draft had been in abeyance since 1999, since it appeared the A-League tree had been shaken as much as it could be. By 2003, though, what with players coming back from Europe, and what with guys like Troy Dayak and Kerry Zavagnin managing to revive their careers in the USL, it was [. Click to continue reading...

Optimism was slowly returning to the league at this point - they sold out MLS Cup a few months earlier, another SSS was opening up - who knows, they might even expand again at some point. It looked as if Los Angeles was going to settle in for a nice, long dynasty, although teams like the Metrostars were [. Click to continue reading...

In this week's US Soccer Players article, I write that Taylor Twellman wants more money. Click to continue reading...

San Jose - F Usually I like to wait five years before grading (I need to do 2003 at some point), but I can call this one today. I don't care how shallow or weak the draft pool is. The Quakes just bet that none of them has more upside than Nick Garcia. Or, that the [...] Click to continue reading...

Ladies and gentlemen, here is the full text of every single e-mail that Steve Davis is getting today: "No Jonathan Bornstein?" I choose to believe that, like me, Davis refuses to acknowledge the existence of Bizarro Chivas. Click to continue reading...

Good friend/Riot Squader S.Bones has the proof. Titus 1:5. For this cause left I thee in Crete, that you should sent in order the things that are wanting Click to continue reading...