Who Ate All the Pies Archives for January 2017

FA Cup Fifth Round Draw: Non-Leaguers Sutton United Pitted Against Arsenal, Lincoln City Get Burnley

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

The draw for the fifth round of the FA Cup has been completed (on The One Show, for crying out loud) and the two non-league sides left in the competition have both bagged themselves plum ties.

After sending Ipswich packing in the fourth tie, Lincoln City will travel to Premier League Burnley, while Sutton United in the fifth round for the first time ever will be welcoming the mighty Arsenal to Gander Green Lane.

‘I Will Never Play For Leicester Again’ – Leonardo Ulloa Spits Dummy Out On Twitter Over Claudio Ranieri’s ‘Broken Promises’

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Leonardo Ulloa has publicly declared that he will never play for Leicester City again after the club 'broke promises' they made to him.

Just last week, Ulloa's agent branded Claudio Ranieri a "selfish, egocentric egotist" for reneging on his promise to renew the Argentinian striker'scontract, and then blocking his transfer request thereafter.

Official: Mainz Welcome Bojan Krkic After Stoke City Send Striker Out On Loan For Rest Of Season (Photos)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Photo: @Mainz05en/Twitter

Theymay have ever so slightly snuck it under the radar, but Mainz 05 secured the services of one Bojan Krkic for the rest of the season yesterday.

Having found it hard to keep hold ofa stable place in the first-string so far this season, Stoke City decided to letthe 26-year-old forward to finish 2016/17 in the Bundesliga to help keep his eye in.

West Ham Offer Jilted Fans Questionable ‘Deal’ On Returned Dimitri Payet Replica Shirts

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

In the wakeDimitri Payet of successfully wriggling his way back to Marseille, it's fair to say that many West Hams have been left feeling a little short-changed by theFrenchman's little power play many in a quite literal sense.

Indeed, one aggrieved fan contacted chief executive Karren Brady to inquire as to whether the Hammers would be reimbursing people who had spent money onPayet replica shirts before the whole thing turned sour.

Official: West Ham Grumble About ‘Lack Of Commitment And Respect’ As Dimitri Payet Rejoins Marseille

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

West Ham have waved Dimitri Payet off by citing his "lack of commitment and respect" after the pouty French forward officially completed his return to Marseille over the weekend.

As you well know, Payet through a tantrum at the turn of the year and flat-out refused to play for the Hammers in order to instigatea move away, despite signing a new (and lucrative) long-term contract last February.

Reports: David Moyes Continues Ambitious Plan To Turn Sunderland Into ‘Everton B’ With Dual Move For Bryan Oviedo And Darron Gibson

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

David Moyes' ambitious plan to reunite alumni of Everton's B-team at Sunderland continues apace today with news that both Bryan Oviedo and Darron Gibson are having medicals on Wearside.

With Joleon Lescott, Steven Pienaar, Victor Anichebe and Jack Rodwell all already on board, it looks like deals for both Oviedo and Gibson are now on the very cusp of going through.

Official: Crystal Palace Sign Patrick Van Aanholt From Fellow Stragglers Sunderland (Photo)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Photo: @CPFC/Twitter

Just a quickie to confirm that Crystal Palace have completed the signing of Patrick van Aanholt from fellow stragglers Sunderland.

The Dutch full-back has signed a four-and-a-half year deal with the Eagles...

#CPFC are delighted to announce the signing of @pvanaanholt on a four-and-a-half year deal for an undisclosed fee!

Adam Lallana Named ‘England Player Of The Year’ For 2016 (Photo)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Photo: @England/Twitter

Congratulations are in order for Adam Lallana who has been crowned as England Player of the Year for 2016.

The Liverpool man came out on top in the FA's fan poll, taking 39% of the votes to clinch it over Jamie Vardy (12%) and Wayne Rooney (9%) in second and third place respectively.

Presenting: One Image That Signifies The Magnitude Of Sutton United’s Heroic FA Cup Run More Than Any Other…

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 1 view

By seeing off old foes Leeds on Saturday afternoon, Sutton United barrelled their way into the FA Cup fifth round for the first time in the club's history.

After being knocked out in the fourth round before on two occasions (once against Leeds in 1970, and then again against Norwich in 1989), The U's broke new ground to ensure that there would be two non-league clubs in the fifth round draw also an all-time first.

La Liga: Referee Shambles Sees Barcelona Robbed Of Goal Which Crossed Line And Match Report Bizarrely Botched

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 3 views

Barcelona lost ground to La Liga leaders Real Madrid at the weekend, with the Catalan giants drawing 1-1 away to Real Betis courtesy of a last-gasp Luis Suarez goal.

However, Luis Enrique's side were robbed of another legitimate goal earlier in the game, when the officials failed to see that the ball had clearly gone over the line of the Betis goal.

FA Cup: Son Shines As Tottenham Produce Dramatic Late Comeback Win v Wycombe (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Tottenham produced a dramatic comeback to secure a last-gasp win against League Two Wycombe Wanderers on Saturday at White Hart Lane.

Embed from Getty Images

The visitors took a shock lead against a mix-and-match Spurs side on 23 minutes when Paul Hayes, who had already hit the woodwork, fired home courtesy of a fine volley.

Spot Of Bother: Hull’s Abel Hernandez Misses Two Penalties In 28 Seconds v Fulham (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 1 view

Hull City suffered an embarrassing 4-1 defeat away to Fulham in the FA Cup fourth round in Sunday, with Tigers' striker Abel Hernandez managing to miss two penalties withinjust28 seconds.

Embed from Getty Images

Premier League side Hull were already 4-1 down when, late on, Andrew Robertson was felled in the box by Fulham defender Tomas Kalas.

Pinch Of Perfection: Walcott Nets Hat-Trick, Welbeck Bags Brace As Arsenal Demolish Southampton In FA Cup (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Both Southampton and Arsenal made 10 changes to their starting line-ups ahead of this fourth round FA Cup clash on Saturday evening.

However, the Gunners' superior squad strength saw them produce a superb display, with Theo Walcott netting a hat-trick and Danny Welbeck a brace (as well as producing a rather fine 'saltbae' celebration).

Ligue 1: Lyon Midfielder Mathieu Valbuena Misses Open Goal From All Of Six Yards v Lille (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Lyon failed to close the gap on third placed PSG on Saturday, with the Les Gones losing 2-1 at home to Lille.

The hosts really should have come away from the game with at least a draw, only for French international Mathieu Valbuena to register one of the misses of the season.

With Lille winning 1-0 and the game midway through the second-half, Valbuena was left with a simply tap-in from the edge of the six-yard box after 'keeper Vincent Enyama had palmed the ball away.

FA Cup: Liverpool Crash Out To Wolves At Anfield As Red’s Nightmare January Continues (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Liverpool's nightmare January schedule ended with yet another surprise defeat on Saturday, with the Reds losing 2-1 at home to Championship side Wolves in the FA Cup fourth round.

Embed from Getty Images

The visitors got off to the perfect start, with an unmarked Richard Stearman heading home after just 53 seconds.

Official: West Ham Snap Up Hull Midfielder Robert Snodgrass In £10.2m Deal

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Robert Snodgrass has joined West Ham United from Hull City for a fee of £10.2m.

Embed from Getty Images

The 29-year-old midfielder had been expected to leave the KCOM Stadium, with a number of clubs interested in his services. including Middlesbrough and Burnley.

Embed from Getty Images

However, the Hammers got their manon Friday, with the Scottish international signing a three-and-a-half year deal with the Londoners.

FA Cup: Derby’s Darren Bent Scores Contender For Worst Own-Goal In History v Leicester (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Hosting Leicester City at the Reebok Stadium, Derby County would have been hoping to keep things tight against the Premier League champions and to not give away any cheap goals. Enter Rams striker Darren Bent, who, after just eight minutes, was responsible for a nightmare own-goal.

Embed from Getty Images

The former Tottenham and Aston Villa hitman had a chance to clear the ball off the line after a Leicester corner.

Charlton’s Roland Duchatelet Voted Worst Owner In English Football Among Poll Of 4,800 Fans

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Charlton Athletic's beloved Roland Duchatelet has been voted as the worst club owner in English football in a poll over almost 5,000 fans.

The poll in question, conducted by Against League 3, saw 4,804 supporters give their overall opinion of their club's owners in the form of a 1-10 rating.

Sunderland Set To Make Hefty Profit On Patrick Van Aanholt As Crystal Palace Agree £14m Fee

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Sunderland are set to make a tidy little profit on Patrick van Aanholt after accepting Crystal Palace's £14million bid for the Dutch full-back.

According to ITV News, Van Aanholt filed a transfer request and informedSunderland officials that he no longer wants to play for the club, who are currently rock-bottom of the Premier League.

Napoli Fans Plan To Welcome Gonzalo Higuain Back To Stadio San Paolo With ‘Giant Synchronised Raspberry’

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Napoli fans havehatched a plan to mark Gonzalo Higuain's return to the Stadio San Paolo with a "single giant synchronised raspberry."

As you well know, Higuain incurred the Neapolitan wrath when he jumped ship to Juventus in a €90millionmove last summer.

The Argentinian striker is set to return from whence he came when Juve travel to Naples on 2nd April, andone intrepid fan is attempting to organise a mass 'welcome party' for the occasion.

Brede Hangeland: Ex-Fulham And Crystal Palace Hero Doesn’t Disappoint After Being Asked To Name Laziest XI Teammates

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 1 view

Waffling away on a Norwegian podcast, Brede Hangeland spent a little time reminiscing about his career specifically the laziest players he's ever played alongside.

Speaking in a light-hearted interview withHeiaFotball, Hangeland was asked to name XI of the most work-shy fops he'd ever played with.

EFL Cup: Man Utd Reach Final Despite Second Leg Defeat To Hull (Photos & Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Manchester United will face Southampton in the final of the EFL Cup despite losing 2-1 to Hull City in the semi-final second leg on Thursday at the KCOM Stadium.

Embed from Getty Images

Ahead of the game. the Hull players wore t-shirts in support of team-mate Ryan Mason, who continues to recover in hospital after that horror head clash with Gary Cahill last weekend.

FAIL: Hapless Turkish Defender Scores Own Goal After Giving Goalkeeper Over-Enthusiastic Hug (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 1 view

You'll have to forgive the slightly sketchy details here, but we think the following snippet of 'action' comes from the Turkish lower leagues.

What you're about to see is the goalkeeper for Gaziantep Buyuksehir Belediyespor(we think) make a fine save from a penalty, only to immediate concede the most pathetic own-goal of all time.

Antoine Griezmann To Voice Superman In French Version Of ‘The Lego Batman Movie’

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

It's been announced that Antoine Griezmann will provide the voice of Superman in the French version of the upcoming'Lego Batman Movie'.

The Atletico Madrid striker broke the news of his first major screen role via his official Facebook page...

For the record, it was Channing Tatum who provided Superman's dulcet tones in original The Lego Movie.

Middlesbrough In Talks To Bring Jese Rodriguez In On Loan For Remainder Of Season

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Eight months ago he was winning the Champions League with Real Madrid and now, via PSG, it looks like Jese Rodriguez is about to turn up in Middlesbrough.

Hardly the most well-trodden of football paths.

Anyway, it's being widely reported that Jese is in talks with Boro' over a six-month loan deal after failing to make a dint at PSG since his £21million move last August.

Get Ready For The Nations League: UEFA Confirm Format Of New Sprawling 55-Team International Tournament

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Concerned about the dwindling appetite for meaningless friendlies, UEFA have decided to take a pro-active step byintroducing a brand new international competition.

Starting in 2018, European nations will compete in the UEFA Nations League a tournament featuring 55 teams, four leagues (split into mini-groups), promotion, relegation and a 'Final Four' showpiece.

Championship: Souleymane Doukara Nets Thunderous Volley As Leeds Beat Nottm Forest To Go Third (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 1 view

Leeds United moved up to third in the Championship, courtesy of their Wednesday night win against Nottingham Forest at Elland Road.

The moment of the match came courtesy ofSouleymane Doukara, who produced a magnificent volleyed finish to seal the deal for the Whites.

Embed from Getty Images

New Zealand striker Chris Wood opened the scoring on 55 minutes, courtesy of a close-range finish.

EFL Cup: Southampton Stun Liverpool At Anfield To Secure Wembley (Photos & Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Southampton will appear in their first major final since 2003 after the Saints shocked Liverpool at Anfield in the EFL Cup semi-final second leg.

Embed from Getty Images

Saints were 1-0 up from the first leg, courtesy of Nathan Redmond's goal at St. Mary's and at Anfield on Wednesday night, the visitors repeated the scoreline.

Official: Watford Fork Over £2.3m To Sign Mauro Zarate From Fiorentina

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Watford have announced that they've secured the signing ofMauro Zarate.

The Hornets have reportedly paid £2.3million to nab the former Birmingham, QPR and West Hamstriker, who joins from Fiorentina...

OFFICIAL: Mauro Zárate has joined #watfordfc from @acffiorentina in a two-and-a-half-year deal.

Bolton Fan Launches Petition To Reinstate Groundsman Sacked By Southend After Match Frozen Off

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Bolton Wanderers fans have launched a petition in the hope of getting Southend United's former head groundsman his job back.

After 27 years at the club, Ken Hare was harshly dismissed by Southend at the weekendafter their League One tie against Bolton was postponed due to the pitch being frozen.

Bayern Munich Deliver Sausages To Ingolstadt As ‘Thank You’ For Beating Rivals RB Leipzig (Photo)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Bayern Munich have sent a platterof sausages to neighbouring clubIngolstadt as a thank-you for beating Bundesliga rivals RB Leipzig back in December.

Karl-Heinz Rummenigge promised to ply Ingolstadt with "a wagon load of weisswurst (a Bavarian white sausage) and wheat beer" if they managed to disrupt Leipzig's momentum.

Official: Philippe Coutinho Signs New Five-Year Contract To Become Liverpool’s Top Earner (Photo)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

With Barcelona said to be sniffing around, Liverpool have gone and cinched up Philippe Coutinho to a meaty new contract.

The Brazilian forward has signed a new five-year deal, reportedly worth somewhere in the region of £150,000-a-week thus making him the highest earner at the club...

✍ It's the news you've been waiting for.

St. Johnstone Produce Awful Promo Video For Upcoming Match As Players Lip-Sync To ‘Blue (Da Ba Dee)’

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

In a desperate bid to put bums on seats for this Saturday's game against Hamilton, some bright spark inSt. Johnstone's PR department decided that what they needed was a good ol' fashioned promo video.

After giving it a bit of thought, it was further decided that the video should be a lip-sync version of Eiffel 65's enduring Euro-trance classic 'Blue (Da-Ba-Dee)'.

‘I’m Blessed With Golden Genes’ – Emmanuel Adebayor Unsurprisingly Confident He Could Still Cut It In Premier League

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

As humble and self-effacing as ever, Emmanuel Adebayor has announced he's more than ready for a return to the Premier League thanks to his"golden genes".

And there's us thinking his genes were more of a 'neon puce'...

Anyway, after slumping out of the Africa Cup of Nations with Togo last night, the 32-year-old's thoughts immediately turned back to matters of a domestic nature having been without a club since leaving Crystal Palace at the end of last season.

Sporting Lisbon Fined £650 After Rowdy Fans Throw Packet Of Beans At Opposing Goalkeeper

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

In what surely must be unprecedented, Sporting Lisbon have been fined after their fans hurled a bag of beans at their opponent's goalkeeper.

According to O Jogo, the Portuguese Football Federation (FPF) have beenstung after a packet of lupini beans were thrown in the direction of Maritimo 'keeper Charles during the 2-2 draw between the two teams on Saturday.

Non-League: Greenwich Borough Produce Flashy Highlight Package Despite Match Being Abandoned After 15 Minutes (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Due to the sub-zeroconditions, Greenwich Borough saw their London County Cup game against Hanwell Town abandoned after just 15 minutes.

Sadly, despite the game going ahead, it only took quarter of an hour for the referee to decide that the frigid surface was too dangerous to continue playing on.

‘F**king White Bitch’ – Arsenal Midfielder Granit Xhaka Accused Of Racially Abusing British Airways Staff Member

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Granit Xhaka's bad week has just got a whole lot worse after the Arsenal midfielder found himself accused of racially abusing a member of British Airways staff.

Following hot on the heels of hisidiotic red card against West Ham, the Albanian spent his Tuesday morning being interviewed by police after an incident at Heathrow the previous evening.

Chocolate Balls: Premier League To Be Sponsored By Cadbury From 2017/18 Season (Photo)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Photo: @premierleague/Twitter

The Premier League have announced that they've gone out and snagged themselves a new commercial partner in the shape of Cadbury chocolate.

The famously purple chocolatiers will be sponsoring the top flight for the three years, beginning at the start of the 2017/18 season.

Swish: Inter Milan Goalkeeper Ionut Radu Scores Brilliant Over-The-Head ‘Basketball’ Trick Shot (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Inter Milan goalkeeper Ionut Radu showcased hishidden talent for trick-shots while farting around in the gym after training recently.

Away from the rest of the squad, the Romanian stopper set up his camera and filmed himself pulling off a rather neat little over-the-head shot into the basketball hoop.

Here’s That Picture Of Sam Allardyce Dressed Up As Cheryl Cole You’ve Always Wanted (Photo)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Anybody who has read Sam Allardyce'sbook, ‘Big Sam: The Autobiography', will no doubt still be suffering residual effects of the psychological trauma caused by one particularly infamous passage.

While discussing his extra-curricular pursuitsand his penchant for the party, Allardyce fondly reminisced:

I squeezed into some very tight black pants and nailed the Moonwalk.

Liverpool: Hull City Sign Forgotten Man Lazar Markovic On Loan For Rest Of Season

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Liverpool's Serbian attacker Lazar Markovic has moved to Hull on loan for the rest of the season.

Embed from Getty Images

The ex-Partizan Belgrade winger joined Liverpool from Benfica for a sizeable £20m in 2014 but has struggled to make his mark an Anfield.

Embed from Getty Images

The 22-year-oldnetted just three goals in his 19 appearances with the Merseysiders in 2014/15 and was sent out on loan to Fenerbahceby Brendan Rodgers the following season.

Real Madrid Lose £5m Court Battle Against Catalan Television Station Over Video Depicting Pepe As Hannibal Lecter

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Real Madrid have lost acourt case filed against a Catalan television company over a video thatdepicted Pepe as Hannibal Lecter.

The Spanish Supreme Court rejected Madrid's demand for€6million (around £5.2million) in compensation for the clip that was aired almost four years ago.

Image: Punto Pelota/TV3

The video, broadcastby the TV3 station, featuredPepe slurping away while wearing a Lecter-style face mask, as well as footage of Madrid players hacking away atLionel Messi combined with footage of hyenas hunting down prey.

Official: Sunderland Sign Free Agent Joleon Lescott On Short-Term Deal (Photo)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

David Moyes, Sunderland manager, 20th January:

To suggest that a player we might bring in would be making a big difference would not be correct.

24th January:

#SAFC have signed @JoleonLescott on a short-term deal https://t.

Man Utd To Reduce Capacity Of Old Trafford In Order To Make Room For More Disabled Supporters

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Manchester United have put pressure on their Premier League contemporaries by announcing plans to reduce the capacity of Old Trafford in order to make room for more disabled supporters.

The club are hoping to raise the number of wheelchair-accessible seats at Old Trafford from 120 to more than 300, which will require having to relocate hundreds of season-ticket holders.

AFCON 2017: Senegal ‘Keeper Khadim N’Diaye Indulges In Brazen Act Of Playacting (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 2 views

One of the pre-tournament favourites, Algeria, crashed out of the Africa Cup on Nations after drawing 2-2 with a second-string Senegal in their final group game.

The Fennecs' hopes of netting a late winner were also hampered by some bizarre play-acting from Senegal 'keeperKhadim N'Diaye, who produced a rather exquisite dive whilst taking a goal-kick.

Official: Gerard Deulofeu Leaves Everton To Join AC Milan On Loan (At Second Time Of Trying)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Photo: @Everton/Twitter

It required a do-over, but Everton have tonight confirmed that Gerard Deulofeu has joined AC Milan on loan for the rest of the season and for realsies this time!

Last week, Milan announced that Deulofeu had signed for them only for Everton to immediately rubbishthe announcement, leading the Italian side to hastily delete their welcome tweet a couple of hours after posting it.

Corinthians Submit Contract Offer To Didier Drogba, Attempt To Woo Him By Chucking In An Armoured Car (Photo)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Currently a free agent after walking away from Montreal Impact at the end of the MLS season, Didier Drogba is currently being courted by a motley packof potential suitors.

Among those are Corinthians, with the Brazilian side reportedly submitting an offer to Drogba via an intermediary party.

Ice Cold: Southend United Sack Head Groundsman After Match Cancelled Due To Frozen Pitch

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Southend United have made the somewhat overly-severedecisionto sack their groundsman after a frozen pitch caused Saturday's League One tie against Bolton to be called off.

Ken Hare, head groundsman at Roots Hall for the past 27 years, was dismissed on Sunday after freezing temperatures left the pitch unplayable the day before.

Celtic: Former Chelsea And Man City Winger Scott Sinclair Bags Beauty Against Albion Rovers (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Celtic eased into the fifth round of the Scottish Cup on Sunday, courtesy of a 3-1 win against Scottish League One side Albion Rovers. The goal of the game undoubtedly came courtesy of Scott Sinclair, with the former Chelsea, Man City and Swansea attacker produced an exquisite curling finish.

Embed from Getty Images

Sinclair's stunner was the opening goal of the game at theExcelsior Stadium, with the 27-year-old curling a magnificent effort into the top corner of the Wee Rovers' net.

Hull City Confirm Ryan Mason In ‘Stable Condition’ After Suffering Fractured Skull In Collision With Chelsea’s Gary Cahill

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Hull City have confirmed that Ryan Mason is now in a "stable condition" in hospital after suffering a fractured skull during Sunday's game against Chelsea.

Mason was involved in a gruesome (though completely accidental) clash of heads with Gary Cahill that left the Chelsea defender groggyand the Hull midfielder flat out on the turf.

Championship: Nott’m Forest Midfielder Ben Osborn Scores Superb ‘Le Tissier-Style’ Freekick To Sink Bristol City (Official Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Amid a season chock full of dirge and drudgery, Nottingham Forest youngling Ben Osborn produced a rare moment of brilliance in Saturday's narrow win over Bristol City.

Indeed, the game was settled by a single goal, which emanatedfrom a 67th-minute set-piece routine devised and executed superbly by Osborn and fellow midfield prospect Matty Cash.

11 Freunde: German Magazine Trial Marco Van Basten’s Pioneering ‘Football Without Offside’ Idea (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

As you no doubt recall, Marco van Basten recently used his standing as FIFA's technical consultant to propose a raft of new rule changes to help spruce the beautiful game up a bit.

As well as orange cards and 'American' penalty shoot-outs, the legendary Dutch striker suggested that the offside rule be scrapped entirely to help facilitate more goalmouth action.

Swedish Wunderkind Alexander Isak On Cusp Of Joining Dortmund, Transfer Accidentally Leaked By Dickson Etuhu (Photo)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

After scoring 10 goals in 19 starts during his debut Allsvenskan season, it looks like AIK's teenage prodigy Alexander Isak is already on the cusp of making the leap to the big time with Borussia Dortmund.

The 17-year-old striker is one of the hottest youth tickets in Europe, with Real Madrid also reported to be keen.

‘He’s Able To Speak About It’ – Hull City Issue Update On Ryan Mason’s Condition After Midfielder Visited In Hospital By Gary Cahill And John Terry

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Just as they promised they would, Hull City have offered an update on Ryan Mason's condition after the midfielder suffered a fractured skullin an aerial collision with Gary Cahill during Sunday's game against Chelsea.

After being taken straight to hospital and undergoing surgery, Mason is now in a stable condition and recuperating well.

Arsenal: Drama At The Emirates As Controversial Late Alexis Sanchez Penalty Sees Gunners Beat Burnley (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

On Sunday afternoonagainst Burnley, the Emirates stadium saw a most perfect example of how the home team can make life ridiculously hard for themselves. This particular case of 'Arsenalising' a game saw the home shoot themselves in the foot on more than one occasion but eventually, in thoroughly dramatic fashion, seal an incredible victory.

Pished: Rod Stewart Appears To Be ‘Well Greased’ While Doing Scottish Cup Draw Live On Television (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 2 views

In what was a fair old coup, the Scottish FA managed to get Rod Stewartto help perform the live televised draw for the fifth round of the Scottish Cup.

Unfortunately for them, it quickly became apparent that Sir Roderick may have taken rather liberal advantage of thehospitality on offer, as the 72-year-old rocklegend dive-bombed, swooshed, giggled and mugged his way through the entire thing!

Raw Emotion: Chapecoense Return From Brink To Play First Game Since Tragic Plane Crash (Photos & Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Many a tear was shed as Chapecoense returned to the pitch to play their first game since the tragic plane crash that pretty much decimated their entire team in November.

With almost everybody in the sold-out tadium already in floods, three of the six survivors Neto, Alan Ruschel and goalkeeper Jackson Follmann, who had his leg amputated were presented with the Copa Sudamerica trophy before kick-off against Palmeiras.

Portsmouth Defender Christian Burgess Jokingly Invited To Under-12s Training Session After League Two Match Frozen Off – Lo And Behold… (Photo)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

With his League Two game against Crawley Town postponed due to a frozen pitch, Portsmouth defender Christian Burgess suddenly found himself at a loose end on Saturday afternoon.

Indeed, the 25-year-old centre-half put a plea out on Twitter in a desperate attempt to find something to do...

Don't know what to do with myself.

Man Utd: Wayne Rooney Becomes Red Devils’ Top-Scorer After Injury Time Equaliser v Stoke (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Wayne Rooney netted a record-breaking 250th goal for Manchester United as the Red Devils secured a last-gasp point against Stoke on Saturday.

Embed from Getty Images

Stoke looked headed for a third straight win in the league, courtesy of a Juan Mata own-goal.

However, in injury time, England captain Rooney curled home a superb free-kick to rescue a point for Jose Mourinho's side,

That dramatic equaliser saw Rooney net his 250th goal for United, one more than Bobby Charlton to go top of United's list of all-time top goalscorers.

La Liga: Sprinklers Go Off During Las Palmas v Deportivo Clash (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

The ground staff at theEstadio Gran Canaria scored a bit of an own-goal on Firday night, during Las Palmas' La Liga clash with Deportivo La Coruna. With the game in full flow, the sprinkler system suddenly turned on, with the ref (spoilsport!) temporarily halting the game.

The incident happened early in the second-half, with the hosts leading 1-0.

Premier League: Swansea Drag Themselves Off The Bottom With Exciting 3-2 Win Over Liverpool (Photos & Highlights)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Swansea City dragged themselves (if only temporarily) off the bottom of the Premier League and out of the relegation zone entirely with an exciting 3-2 win over Liverpool in Saturday's early kick-off.

After a largely drab first half lolloped by without note, Fernando Llorenteburst into life after the restart with two goals in the space of four minutes.

Aston Villa: Steve Bruce Drops In For Pre-Match Kebab While Wearing Full Training Kit (Photo)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

"Onion rings or chips? Onion rings or chips? ...Both"

Good on Steve Bruce, for thinking nothing of preparing for today's Championship clash against Preston at Villa Park with a nourishing pre-game kebab; the food of kings.

Indeed, the Aston Villa manager was apparently spotted scouring the menu in a local fast food shop on the morning of the match, while wearing his full training gear.

Bundesliga: Robert Lewandowski Nets Stupendous Last-Minute Winner For Bayern Munich v Freiburg (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Robert Lewandowski, not for the first time, came to the rescue of Bayern Munich on Friday night, netting an utterly stupendous last-gasp winner against Freiburg.

Embed from Getty Images

The game in Freiburg was headed towards a 1-1 draw, courtesy of first-half goals fromJanik Haberer for the hosts and Lewandowski himself.

‘New Signings Probably Won’t Make A Difference’ – David Moyes Sounds Ferocious Rallying Call As Sunderland Battle Relegation

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Sunderland manager David Moyes has sounded a ferocious battle cry that is sure to roll across the valleys of the Premier League and curdle the blood of all who hear it.

With his side joint-bottom of the table and desperately fighting against relegation, the swivel-eyed Scot has drawn upon the fearless courage of his ancestors and delivered a rebellious call to arms loudenough to raise the dead.

Presenting: ‘Dangerous Game’, Potentially The New Worst Football Movie Ever Made (Official Trailer)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 1 view

Move over 'United Passions', because it looks like there's a new worst football movie ever in town.

What you're about to witness is the trailor for a new movie that looks so ineffably awful that Guardian reviewer Stuart Heritage assumed it must be a deliberate hoaxof some sort.

Dangerous Game stars Callum Best (reality 'star' son of George) as a Premiership footballer who dabbles in robbing shoe shops while dressed as Gary Lineker on behalf of the Russian mafia or something like that.

Official: Memphis Depay Completes £16m Move From Man Utd To Anywhere Else (Photo)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Photo: @OL/Twitter

That's it. It's done. Memphis Depay is officially an employee of Olympique Lyonnaise.

The Dutch winger has completed his long-awaited transfer from Manchester United to anywhere elsefor an initial fee of £16million, though that will rise to around £21million should certain stipulations be met in the future.

Tottenham: New £750m Stadium To Feature UK’s Longest Bar, Micro-Brewery And ‘Glass Player Tunnel’ (Photos & Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Photo: @SpursOfficial/Twitter

With work already underway, Tottenham have been excitedly demonstrating how their flashy new £750million stadium will eventually lookonce completed next year.

As well as featuring over 1,600 doors (which seems an odd thing to mention), the state-of-the-art ground will house Britain's first "purpose-built, glass-walled tunnel" which willallow selected fans in the adjacent private bar a "behind-the-scenes view" of the players making their way to and from the pitch.

Sevilla Coach Jorge Sampaoli Sums Up Peerless Genius Of Lionel Messi With One Great ‘Batman’ Quip

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 1 view

Always good for a pithy quip, if ever anybody was going to sum up the genius of Lionel Messi in one sentence, it was probably going to be Jorge Sampaoli.

Talking to BeIN Sports,Sevilla's Argentinian coach was asked for a first-hand opinion of his fellow countryman, to which he replied...

Sampaoli en @beINSPORTSes: "Comparar a Messi con el resto es comparar a un gran policía con Batman".

Roma: Radja Nainggolan Scores Thumping Volley Against Sampdoria, Francesco Totti Applauds From Bench (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Roma kept the pressure ramped up on Serie A leaders Juventus with a comprehensive 4-0 rollicking of Sampdoria on Thursday evening.

Radja Nainggolanhelped himself to a brace on the night, opening the scoring five minutes before half-time with a stonking volley from the edge of the area...

Indeed, the Belgian midfielder's strike was so mighty that it even coaxed an excited reaction out of the old-age pensioner sat on Roma's bench.

Dimitri Payet Suffers Ultimate Ignominy After Being Deleted From West Ham Players’ Whatsapp Group

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Having beenmade to train with the Under-23s after downing tools and refusing to play a week or so ago, the full ramifications of Dimitri Payet's insubordination at West Ham are now beginning to hit home.

Indeed, as well has being frozen out of the first-team by Slaven Bilic for attempting to weasel a move back to Marseille, Payet has now suffered the ultimate in footballing ignominy he's been deleted from Mark Noble's team Whatsapp group.

AFCON 2017: Piqueti Scores Solo Wonder-Goal For Guinea-Bissau v Cameroon (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 1 view

Africa Cup of Nations first-timers Guinea-Bissau produced one of the goals of the tournament so far against Cameroon, with winger Piquito embarking on an epic pitch-length dribble.

Embed from Getty Images

With the score at 0-0, Sporting Braga attackerPiqueti picked up the ball just outside his own box, before sailing past two opponents and into the Cameroon box, where he fired home a classic opener.

Shambles: Leyton Orient Chief Executive Insults Fans And Players In Bizarre Auto-Translated Club Statement

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 1 view

Fitting that on the very day Donald Trump became inaugurated as President, Leyton Orient's beloved chief executive Alessandro Angelieri used a club statement to embark upon a bitter, pompous, narcissisticdiatribe of his own.

For the uninitiated, Orient are a bit of a shambles and have been for a couple of years.

Man City: Brazilian Wonder Kid Gabriel Jesus Completes £27m Move to Citizens

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Gabriel Jesus has formally completed his move to Manchester City, meaning the 19-year-old is eligible to line out against Tottenham on Saturday.

The Brazilian international agreed a a five-year deal with the Citizens back in August but stayed on with Palmeiras until the end of the Brazilian domestic season, helping his side to theBrazilian Championship title.

Middlesbrough: Marten De Roon Goes Out Of His Way To Assist Young Fan With School Literacy Project (Photo & Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

While he's not the flashiest of signings, Marten de Roon has already become something of a minor fan favourite at Middlesbrough since joining in the summer principally for his tireless work-rate and by generally being as honest as the day is long.

Well, the Dutch midfielder may well have just gone and cemented his reputation with a lovely little gesture after recently receiving a hand-written letter from a young Boro' fan.

Man Utd: Misfiring Dutch Winger Memphis Depay Set For £16m Lyon Move

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Memphis Depay's nightmare spell at Manchester United looks set to end with the Red Devils agreeing to sell the Dutch international to Ligue 1 side Lyon.

The French club will cough up £16million for the 22 year-old, although that could rise to £21.7million with add-ons.

Embed from Getty Images

Depay was brought to Old Trafford by Louis van Gaal on the back of a superb 2014/15 season in the Netherlands with PSV, with the winger topping the scoring charts and inspiring his side to the Eredivisie title.

Jurgen Klopp Presented With Giant Cornish Pasty After Seeing Off Plymouth In FA Cup Third Round (Photo & Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 2 views

For reasons we can't quite fathom, Jurgen Klopp was presented with a rather fantastic souvenir afterlast night's FA Cup third round replay at Plymouth Argyle.

At the behest of Argyle's sponsors, the Liverpool coachwas given an enormous commemorative Cornish pasty, presumably to tide him over on the long trip back home.

No Offside, American Penalties And Orange Cards – FIFA Technical Director Marco Van Basten Has Some Interesting Plans To Improve Football

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

In his role as FIFA technical director, Marco van Basten has cobbled together a list of tweaksthat he believes will help preserve football as the world's number one sport of choice.

Sadly, it appears that Van Basten has been at the strong cheese before bed-time, as some of his suggestions are bordering on the crackpot.

Middlesbrough: Marten De Roon Goes Out Of His Way To Assist Young Fan With School Literacy Project (Photo)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

While he's not the flashiest of signings, Marten de Roon has already become something of a minor fan favourite at Middlesbrough since joining in the summer principally for his tireless work-rate and by generally being as honest as the day is long.

Well, the Dutch midfielder may well have just gone and cemented his reputation with a lovely little gesture after recently receiving a hand-written letter from a young Boro' fan.

Arsenal: Arsene Wenger Toys With Journalist Over Questions About Alexis Sanchez And Mesut Ozil (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Like a wily old cat toying with amauled, half-dead mouse, Arsene Wenger used his midweek press conference to trifle with a journalist inquiring intoAlexis Sanchez, Mesut Ozil, and the respectivecontractual negotiationsthereof.

Having previously flat-out refused to comment, it appeared fleetingly that the Arsenal managerwas about to open and offer an update on the situation, much to the surprise of everybody in the room.

FA Cup: Lucas Scores First Goal Since 2010 As Liverpool Beat Plucky Plymouth 1-0 In 3rd Round Replay (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Lucas Leiva was the match-winner for Liverpool against Plymouth on Wednesday night, with the Brazilian scoring for the first time ina whopping 2316 days.

Embed from Getty Images

Jurgen Klopp put out another youthful side at Home Park but it was the experienced Lucas who opened the scoring on 18 minutes, heading home a Philippe Coutinho corner.

Scottish Businessman Pays £150,000 To Become Manager Of Spanish Third Tier Side, Will Be Refunded If He Wins Promotion

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Image: Onyiset

A Scottish businessman has taken the unorthodox step of paying £150,000 tobecome manager of a Spanish third division club on the proviso that he'll get his money back if he manages to get thempromoted.

John Clarkson, who owns a chain of care homes in East Anglia, is set to become the new head coach of CDTudelano after making a "sporting bet" with the club's current president Jesus Miranda.

‘That Was For Graham Taylor’ – Emotional Scenes As Lincoln City Knock Ipswich Out Of FA Cup In 90th Minute (Photos & Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

There was an outpouring of emotion at Sincil Bank last night as Lincoln City mustered a famous victory over Ipswich Town to reach the fourth round of the FA Cup for the first time in over 40 years.

Of course, the night was tinged with sadness due to the death of Graham Taylor, who was in charge of Lincoln the last time they made it into the fourth round way back in 1976 the same year he led them to the Fourth Division title.

Man Utd Become First Club In England To Hire Very Own ‘Counter-Terrorist Manager’

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Manchester United reckon they've become the first sports club in the country tohire their very own in-house 'counter-terrorism manager'.

A depressing sign o' the times if ever there were, United have made the appointment to help bolster and oversee the raft of additional security measures being put in place at Old Trafford on matchdays.

‘If I Have To Slap A Uruguayan, I Will’ – Felipe Melo Attempts (Unsuccessfully) To Dispel Nut Job Image At Palmeiras Unveiling

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

After over a decade hackingandslashing his way around Europe, Felipe Melo moved back home to Brazil last week by way ofa three-year contract with Palmeiras.

The midfielder joins on an initial six-month loan from Inter Milan, which will automatically turn into a permanent move when his contract with the Nerazzurri expires this coming July.

Modern Football Is Rubbish: MK Dons Release ’50th Anniversary’ Shirt Despite Only Being Formed 12 Years Ago (Photo)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Photo: @MKDonsFC/Twitter

What you're looking at there is the new, limited edition '50th anniversary' commemorative shirt, as released by the MK Dons recently.

"But wait, MK Dons are a prefab club that were only formed in 2004 as a desperate corporate cash-grab," we hear you cry in unison.

Leicester City: Claudio Ranieri Inducted Into Italian Football Federation Hall Of Fame (Photo)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Not that he looks overly enthused about it, but Claudio Ranieri has been inducted into the Italian Football Federation (FIGC) Hall of Fame.

Unsurprisingly, Ranieri was honoured for somehow winning the Premier League title last season with a Leicester City team that are currently staving off relegation this time round.

Everton Winger Yannick Bolasie Steps In To Save Former Club Hillingdon Borough From Brink Of Collapse

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 1 view

When non-league side Hillingdon Borough needed a hero in their hour of need, one of their former players stepped up to save the club from the very brink of folding.

That man was none other than Yannick Bolasie, who began his senior career as a teenager at Hillingdon back in 2006.

It all began when Boro' alerted fans thatthey were planning to pull out of theSpartan South Midlands League with immediate effect due to a lack of support.

Coppa Italia: Jeison Murillo Nets Magnificent Bicycle Kick For Inter Milan v Bologna (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Jeison Murillo scored an almost peach of a goal for Internazionale in their Coppa Italia clash with Bologna on Tuesday night, producing an exquisite bicycle kick.

Embed from Getty Images

The goal came just after the half-hour mark in the fourth round of the Italian Cup at the San Siro, with Colombian defender Murillo connecting perfectly with a corner and seeing his gymnastic effort fly into the top corner of the Bologna net.

Liga MX: Club Pachuca Confirm Pitch-Invading Dog Has Already Found New Home

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Photo: @Tuzos/Twitter

ClubPachuca have confirmed that the stray dog that interrupted their recent Liga MX game with Chiapas has found a new home.

The canine interloper came bounding out onto the pitch in the second half of the match, bringing play to a stopfor several minutes before being led away by stewards.

Man City: Bacary Sagna Fined For Questioning Referee’s Integrity With ’10 Against 12′ Instagram Post

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

The FA have confirmed that Bacary Sagna has been fined for an Instagram post he published in the wake of Man City's recent Premier League victoryover Burnley.

Despite the game winning 2-1, Sagna took umbrage at the performance of referee Lee Mason, who sent Fernandinho off after just half an hour for a lunging challenge on Johan Gudmundsson.

Modern Football Is Rubbish: Juventus Ditch Classic Badge In Favour Of New Club Logo (Photo & Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Juventus have proudly announced that they are ditching the club crest that has served them well for the past 45-plusyears in favour of a new streamlined logo.

Unveiled by club presidentAndrea Agnelli has a flashy ceremony in Milan last night, the new 'J' logo is supposedly a "symbol of the Juventus way of living.

La Liga: Sergio Ramos Made An Effort To Compliment Jorge Sampaoli On His Testicles After Sevilla’s Win Over Real Madrid

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

In his role as captain, Sergio Ramos remained magnanimous in defeat after Sevilla boshed Real Madrid in the final minute of Sunday's La Liga dust-up between the two sides.

Immediately after the final whistle, Ramos scuttledover to the home dugout, embraced Jorge Sampaoli and took the time to compliment the Rojiblancoscoach on his testicles.

‘I Do Not Think I’ll Return’ – Former Man Utd Boss Louis Van Gaal All But Confirms Retirement

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Louis van Gaal has all but confirmed that he has retired from management after knocking back a potentially lucrative offer to coach in Asia.

The Dutchman has been out of work since being sacked by Manchester United last May, two days after winning the FA Cup.

However, what started as an extended sabbatical is now looking like a permanent retirement from football, with Van Gaal citing "family reasons" (believed to be the recent sudden death of his son-in-law) for not wanting to wade back into the mire at the age of 65.

‘We’re Rebranding Too!’ – Russian Minnows FC Yenisey Krasnoyarsk Mock Juventus’ Rubbish New Logo

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 2 views

Ever sinceJuventus unveiled theirnew synergised, corporate-friendly club logo earlier today, fans have been quite rightly lining up to take the piss out of them for it.

However, fellow clubs are now joining the fun, with Russian second division outfit FCYenisey Krasnoyarsk proudly announcing that they too are planning to follow in Juve's footsteps by rejigging their lookfor 2017.

10 Unlikely Footballers Who Have Had A Bash At Modelling (Photos)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Football and fashion. It's an irresistible combination.

That said, for every David Beckham or Freddie Ljungberg, there is an equal and opposite reaction...

Slaven Bilic

Smouldering in monochrome, hewn from purest Croatian granite...

Andy Carroll

When Alexander McQueen debuted his new line of Victorian PE kit for centaurs, there was only one man-pony he could call.

Sevilla: Stevan Jovetic Quashes Real Madrid’s 40-Game Unbeaten Streak With Last Minute Stunner (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Despite only joining the clubon loan a few days ago, Stevan Jovetic has wasted little time winning Sevilla fans over with two goals in two games, and both against Real Madrid.

Jovetic came off the bench at half-time to score on his debut against Madrid in Thursday's 3-3 draw, then followed up with the winning goal in Sunday evening's equally dramatic league encounter at the Sanchez Pizjuan.

Eredivisie: Heracles Grounds Staff Leave Suspiciously Penis-Shaped Patch Of Snow On Pitch (Photo & Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Image: Fox Sports NL/Facebook

After a light dusting of snow, the Eredivisie game between Heracles and Groningen went ahead as planned on Saturday.

However, it would appear the Heracles grounds staff didn't manage to clear the entire pitch before kick-off, with asuspiciously phallic-shaped patch of snow remaining in place for the duration of the match.

Let’s Hear It For… Tom Davies, Everton’s Latest Boy Wonder!

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Every once in a while, a performance comes along that suspends if only temporarily the deep-rooted cynicism with which you viewtop-tier professional football.

On Saturday, Everton bounced toa proficient 4-0 win over Pep Guardiola's dullMan City despite amassing only 29% of the possession and mustering four shots on target.

Liga MX: Pachuca Match Interrupted Twice After Pitch Invaded By Cat And Dog (Photos & Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

In unprecedented scenes, Sunday's Liga MX gamebetween Pachuca and Chiapas was interrupted by not one, but two animal interlopers.

It all began just after the hour mark when a playful canine came bounding onto the pitch to say hello to everybody before being ledback from whence he came by the stewards.

Jurgen Klopp Fumes At Jose Mourinho As Zlatan Ibrahimovic Earns Man Utd Late Draw v Liverpool (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

A late Zlatan Ibrahimovic goal secured a point for Manchester United at home to Liverpool in a game which was far more entertaining than the 0-0 bore-draw back in October at Anfield.

In a game with a fair few flashpoints, one incident late on saw Liverpool boss Jurgen Klopp lose it with Jose Mourinho on the touchline.

Everton Shock Sloppy Man City In 4-0 Rout As Pep Guardiola Suffers Biggest Ever League Defeat (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Pep Guardiola's hopes of leading Manchester City to a league title in his first season with the club sufferedyet another hammer blow on Sunday, with the Citizens going down 4-0 away to Everton.

Embed from Getty Images

While City had the lion's share of possession, they struggled to threaten the Toffee's goal and were sloppy throughout.

Serie A: Ex-Man City Striker Edin Dzeko Catapults Dreadful Penalty Into Stratosphere For Roma v Udinese (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 1 view

Roma kept the pressure on Serie A leaders Juventus on Sunday by securing a hard-fought 1-0 win away to Udinese.

Radja Nainggolan netted the only goal of the game, which is lucky for Edin Dzeko who managed to make an unholy mess of a penalty kick.

Embed from Getty Images

Roma took the lead on 12 minutes, with Belgian midfielder volleying home after a superb assist from Kevin Strootman.

Chelsea: Blues Shine Without Diego Costa, Stroll To 3-0 Victory Away At Leicester (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

After a tricky few days which saw star-striker Diego Costa left out of the team over a reported argument with manager Antonio Conte, Chelsea got back to winning ways in the league courtesy of a convincing 3-0 win away to title-holders Leicester.

Embed from Getty Images

With Eden Hazard taking Costa's place up front rather than Michy Batshuayi, who was on the bench, the Blues were the better side throughout.

Kaboom: Andy Carroll Scores Clattering Scissor Kick As West Ham Pummel Crystal Palace (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

With Dimitri Payet still off sulking somewhere, a stirring second-half performance sawWest Ham barrel their way to a 3-0 over Crystal Palace at the London Stadium.

After a slow start to proceedings, Sofiane Feghouli finally got the ball rolling in the 68th minute with his first Premier League goal for the Hammers before Andy Carroll clattered away the second just 10 minutes later.

Graham Taylor: Watford Fans Pay Respects With Mass Shirt Tribute Outside Vicarage Road (Photos & Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 1 view

Watford fans used today's home game against Middlesbrough to stage a mass tribute to their former manager Graham Taylor, who sadly passed away in the week.

Supporters laid down shirts, scarves, flowers and hundreds of hand-written messages outside Vicarage Road, which quickly became a yellow and red shrine.

A-League: Goalkeeper Vedran Janjetovic Pelted With Rubber Snakes During Sydney Derby (Photo)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

The Sydney derby took place in the A-League overnightand eventually wound up goalless, though the evening didn't pass entirely without incident.

Indeed, Sydney FC fans took it upon themselves to bombard Western Sydney Wanderers' goalkeeper Vedran Janjetovic with rubber snakes, which landed draped on the roof of his net.

Premier League Snapshot: West Ham Strategically Place Steward Next To Dmitri Payet Picture Outside Stadium…

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

West Ham took the precaution of stationing a steward right next to an image of Dimitri Payet on the wall outside the London Stadium for their game against Crystal Palace today.

As you're probably well aware, Payet has been refusing to play or train for the Hammers for the past few days after informing the club that he wishes to jump ship before the end of the transfer window.

Chelsea: Diego Costa Left Out Of Blues’ Squad For Leicester Game After Clashing With Antonio Conte

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Diego Costa hasn't traveled with the Chelsea squad to Leicester for their Saturday Premier League clash with the Foxes, after the Spanish striker got embroiled with Blues' boss Antonio Conte over an apparent injury.

Embed from Getty Images

Costa is apparently convinced that he is suffering from a back problem which is linked to his history of hamstring injuries.

Modern Football Is Rubbish: Paul Pogba Becomes First Player To Be Given His Own Twitter Emoji

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

We're not entirely sure how illustrious this really is, but Paul Pogba has become the first footballer to be gifted his very own emoji.

The honour was bestowed on the Manchester United midfielder by Twitter, which means that a little image of Pogba's shorn head will pop up anytime anybody uses the designated #Pogba hashtag.

Retro Football: Original Artist’s Plans For Bolton’s Reebok Stadium Were Quite Something, 1994 (Photo)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Burnden Park, as was (Photo: Legendary Football Grounds)

The year was 1994, and upwardly mobile Bolton Wanderers were preparing to up sticks and leave Burnden Park, their home forthe past 100 years, and into a new, all-singing, all-dancing and most importantly all-seater modern stadium.

Steven Gerrard To Receive The Freedom Of The City Of Liverpool

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 1 view

Word on the wire is that Steven Gerrard is soon to receive the freedom of the City of Liverpool after making the call to retire last November.

The former Liverpool captain had his name formally put forward by the Mayor of Liverpool, Joe Anderson, with the Echo reporting that the nomination is set to be formally agreed at a city council meeting next week.

Guam Premier League: NAPA Rovers Striker Booked For Proposing To Girlfriend After Scoring Overhead Kick (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 1 view

Image: Guam Football Association

We don't think we've ever featured theGuam Budweiser Premier League here on Pies, so it's nice that we get to kick things off with a good'n.

NAPA Rovers brought Guam Shipyard's unbeaten streak to an end on Saturday with a 5-1 win in their first game back after the Christmas break.

‘Kind, Considerate And Totally Without Ego’ – BBC Radio Presenter Mark Pougatch Delivers Wonderful Tribute To Graham Taylor (Audio)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Tributes have been flooding in from all and sundry after Graham Taylorsadly passed away on Thursdayat the age of 72.

Shortly after receiving news that his former BBC Radio colleague had gone, Mark Pougatch put together a wonderful tribute in honour of his friend, which he subsequently delivered with aplomb live on air.

Chelsea: Antonio Conte Breaks Record With Third Consecutive ‘Manager Of The Month’ Award (Photo)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 1 view

Photo: Premier League

With Chelsearattling through six successive victories, it should come as no surprise that Antonio Conte has been bestowed with the Premier League Manager of the Month award for December.

Thanks to their streak, the Bluesequalled the Premier League record of 13 consecutive victories in a single season before finally coming unstuck against Tottenham on the 4th of January.

Official: Hull City Double Dip As Evandro And Oumar Niasse Become Marco Silva’s First Signings (Photo)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Photo: @HullCity/Twitter

Marco Silva has completed his first two pieces of business as Hull City coach today with a double-bubble signing of Evandro and Oumar Niasse.

Niasse arrives on a six-month loan from Everton, where the hesystematically failed to make any kind of impression to the point where Ronald Koeman began refusing to acknowledge the Senegalesestriker's very existence.

Marco Asensio Scores Stunner v Sevilla As Real Madrid Extend Unbeaten Run To Record-Breaking 40 Games (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Real Madrid made it an incredible 40 games unbeaten on Thursday night, with Zinedine Zidane's side drawing 3-3 away to Sevilla in their Copa del Ray last 16 second leg clash.

The result sees Los Merengues proceed to the quarter-finals via a 6-3 aggregate score as well as beating Barcelona's Spanish record of 39 games unbeaten, which was set in 2016.

Official: French Midfielder Morgan Schneiderlin Moves From Man Utd To Everton In £24m Deal

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Everton have signed Morgan Schneiderlin from Manchester United for a fee rising to a hefty £24million.

The 27-year-old Frenchman put pen to paper on a four-year-deal which sees him once again link up with manager Ronald Koeman, who he played under at Southampton.

Embed from Getty Images

Schneiderlin moved to Old Trafford in the summer of 2015 after impressing in central midfield for Saints.

Atom And Humber: Arsenal Fans Raise £500 To Produce Banner Tribute To Alexis Sanchez’s Beloved Dogs (Photo)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Photo: @alexis_officia1/Instagram

With speculation over Alexis Sanchez semi-immediate future coming to the fore again recently, a group of intrepid Arsenal fans are taking steps to persuade the Chilean that he has found himself a loving home at the Emirates.

Indeed, fan group REDaction are seekingto tug on Sanchez's heart strings by producing a couple of banner tributes to the two things he holds above everything else in this world: his dogs, Atom and Humber.

Liverpool: James Milner Did The Most ‘James Milner’ Bit Of Ball Control Ever Against Southampton (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

InJurgen Klopp's own estimation, Liverpool were lucky not to lose 3-0 against Southampton in the first leg of their EFL Cup semi-final, such was the levelof their performance.

However, there was at least one bright spark on the night for the away side, with James Milner reaching the peak of his evolutionary curve thanks to a mesmeric piece of ball control.

Bayern Munich: Thomas Muller Uses ‘Phone’ To Dodge Past Journalists At The Airport (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Thomas Muller is a maverick, this we know.

And so, it should come as no surprise that Bayern Munich's very own "swan in ice-skates" has devised a fiendishly cunning method of glidingpast journalists at airports without being hassled...

❤ Thomas Müller pretending his passport is a phone to avoid the press.

Slaven Bilic Confirms Dimitri Payet Is ‘Refusing To Play’ For West Ham And Wants To Leave

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

West Ham manager Slaven Bilic has confirmed that Dimitri Payet is refusing to play for the cluband wants to leave pronto.

Payet quickly became a fan's favourite at the Hammers after arriving in June of 2015 on a five-year contract, finishing his debut season as the club's Player of the Year and their joint-top goalscorer.

Official: Arsenal Wrap Up New Long-Term Deals For French Trio Coquelin, Koscielny And Giroud (Photo)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

"Four Frenchmen walk into a conference room..." (Photo: Arsenal.com)

Without so much as a peep, Arsenal have today tied three of their first-teamers to new long-term contracts.

Francis Coquelin, Laurent Koscielny and the revitalised Olivier Giroud have all put pen to paper on significant extensions.

Former England Manager Graham Taylor Dies At The Age Of 72

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Awful news is reaching Pies that former England manager Graham Taylor has passed away today at the age of 72.

A statement issued on behalf ofthe Taylor family confirmed that the ex-Watford and Aston Villaboss suffered a suspected heart attack.

With the greatest sadness, we have to announce that Graham passed away at his home early this morning of a suspected heart attack.

EFL Cup: Nathan Redmond On Target As Southampton Edge Liverpool 1-0 In First Leg Semi-Final Clash (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Southampton will take a narrow 1-0 lead with them when they travel to Anfield in two weeks, courtesy of a hard-fought 1-0 first-leg EFL Cup win at St. Mary's on Wednesday night.

Embed from Getty Images

Nathan Redmond scored the only goal of the game on 20 minutes, with the attacker firing a low shot pastLoris Karius.

Some Urchin Has Stolen The Entire Top Half Of Lionel Messi’s Statue In Buenos Aires (Photo)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

While Cristiano Ronaldo was busy picking up his latest FIFA trinket on Monday, Lionel Messi was suffering the ignominy of having his entire upper body stolen.

To clarify, vandals somehow managed to scarper with the entire top half of the Messi statue that was unveiled on the Paseo de la Gloria in Buenos Aires only six months ago.

Non-League Youngster Cohen Bramall Signs For Arsenal The Day After Being Made Redundant

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Photo: Arsenal FC

Arsene Wenger has once again sought to pluck a diamond on the rough by procuringCohen Bramall from non-league Hednesford Town, who he signed for just five months ago.

The 20-year-old, who had previously been on trial with Crystal Palace, has today left the Northern League Premier Division to join the Gunners' Under-23 side.

EFL Cup: Juan Mata And Marouane Fellaini On Target As Man Utd Beat Hull 2-0 At Old Trafford (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Jose Mourinho moved a step closer to securing his first major trophy with Manchester United after his side overcame a stubborn Hull City side in the EFL Cup semi-final first-leg at Old Trafford on Tuesday.

Embed from Getty Images

Marco Silva's side were well organised throughout the game and limited the hosts to just two shots on target in the first-half.

Stefan Jovetic Joins Sevilla On Loan, Reveals He Learned Spanish By Watching Mexican Soap Operas

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Photo: @SevillaFC/Twitter

It appears that any potentiallanguage barrier will not be posing a problem for Stefan Jovetic after the Serbian striker sealed a move to Sevilla yesterday.

Having failed to bed in at Inter Milan, Jovetic joined the La Liga side on a six-month loan with an option to make the transfer permanent at the end of the season.

West Ham: Damning Statistics Show Just How Terrible Gold & Sullivan’s Record Of Signing Strikers Has Been

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Hard as it may be to believe at first, it turns out that West Ham owners David Gold and David Sullivan are almost totally shite at signing strikers.

Case in point being that their most recent attacking acquisition, Simone Zaza, is already on the verge of leaving the club without a single goal to his name though he did manage two shots on target in the space of nine Premier League games.

Gossip Column Stalwarts: 10 Players Relentlessly Linked With Premier League Clubs Who Never Made The Move

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

When it comes to filling up the footballing gossip columns, imagination isn't usually high on the list of requirements.

Scored a decent goal or put in a decent shift on the television last night? You're more than likely going to find your name crow-barred into a cookie-cuttertransfer rumour the following morning.

Arsenal Stars Team Up With Basketball Acrobats Dunking Devils For Superb BT Sport NBA Clip (Video)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Ahead of Thursday's NBA clash between the Indiana Pacers and Denver Nuggets at the O2 Arena, BT Sport have put together a rather nifty video involving Arsenal stars Alex Iwobi, Aaron Ramsey and Per Mertesacker along with basketball acrobatic team the Dunking Devils.

The Dunking Devils, who appeared on Britain's Got Talent last year, pull off some pretty spectacular moves with the help of the Arsenal trio, with Iwobi looking particularly excited at the whole thing!

Arsenal And England Legend Kelly Smith Announces Retirement At The Age Of 38

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

Kelly Smith MBE, Britain's first professional female footballer, has announced her retirement from the sport today at the age of 38.

After signing her first pro-terms contract with New Jersey Lady Stallions in 1999, Smith went on to make her name with three stints at Arsenal Ladies, for whom she bows out as all-time record goalscorer.

Long Live The King: J-League Veteran Kazuyoshi Miura Signs New Contract To Play On Past 50th Birthday

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

The grand old monarchof Japanese football and the world's oldest professional footballer, Kazuyoshi Miura, has signed a new contract that will take him past his 50th birthday.

With King Kazu due to celebrate his half-century at the end of February, it's been announced that Yokohama FC have granted him a new one-year contract extension.

Official: Claude Makelele Joins Swansea City Coaching Staff (Photo)

Who Ate All the Pies at related • 0 views

In slightly out-of-the-bluenews, Claude Makelele has joined Swansea City has part of Paul Clement's coaching staff.

The pair worked together under Carlo Ancelotti at PSG, with Clement bringing his old mucker on board on until the end of the season in a bid to help stave off the drop.

Welcome to Swansea City, Claude Makelele!