Who Ate All the Pies Archives for January 2016

Belgium: Goalkeeper Throws Ball At Ballboy’s Face In Second-Tier Clash Between Royal Antwerp And Tubize (Video)

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From Eden Hazard's infamous skirmish at the Libery Stadiumto West Ham 's Adrian being hurried up by a Palace ballboy, we've seen more than one heated incident between the players on the pitch and those young whippersnappers charged with returning the ball.

This weekend in Belgium, there was another ballboy drama in Belgium's Proximus league, withFC Tubize goalkeeper Quentin Beunardeau getting so worked up by the apparent time-wasting of a ballboy, that he threw the ball back in the youngster's face.

Chelsea: Diego Costa Nets Curling Cracker v Southampton As Blues Extend Winning Streak To Four Games (Video)

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Since their 3-0 defeat away to Arsenal in September, Chelsea have been in superb form in the league.

Against Southampton on Sunday, Antonio Conte's men extended their winning streak in the top-flight to four games, with Diego Costa's long-range strike the icing on the cake for the west Londoners.

Arsenal: Alexis Sanchez Finishes Off Record-Breaking 22-Pass Move As Gunners Shoot Down Sunderland 4-1 (Video)

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Arsenal's fine form continued at the Stadium of Light on Saturday, with the Gunners putting four past struggling Sunderland.

Chilean forward Alexis Sanchez was the star of the show for the visitors, bagging a brace which including a superb team goal which saw 22 passes in the build-up, the most of any top-flight goal this season.

Oldham Fans Mercilessly Mock Rochdale Steward For Looking A Bit Like Boris Johnson (Video)

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A single goal from Matt Lund was enough to see Oldham go down 1-0 at Rochdale in League One on Saturday afternoon, but the travelling fans nevertheless managed to keep themselves entertained.

Fortunately, one of the stewards on duty in the away section had the misfortune of bearing a passing resemblence to wispy-haired Tory buffoon Boris Johnson.

Arsenal Troll Tottenham On Twitter After Fan In Lilywhites’ Top Spotted Watching Gunners (Photo)

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Arsenal kicked off Saturday's Premier League action with a convincing 4-1 win away to struggling Sunderland. Amongst the fans at the Stadium of Light for the game was one chap, oddly enough, in a Spurs shirt.

Not surprisingly, a photo of the bloke in question soon made it onto social media, with Arsenal's own official Twitter account getting involved.

‘We’ve Lost The Ball’ – West Brom Sing Superb Chant During 4-0 Defeat To Man City (Video)

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West Brom endured a tough afternoon at the Hawthorns on Saturday, with Tony Pulis' side hammered 4-0 by table-toppers Manchester City. However, the home fans were in fine voice throughout, particularly with a superb chant about their team's possession.

Embed from Getty Images

When West Brom had possession, the fans sung "We've got the ball" but, not surprisingly, when City won the ball back (very quickly), they seamlessly shifted to "We've lost the ball".

Non-League Snapshot: Guildford City Give Us One Of The Greatest Sporting Images Of All Time (Photo)

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Not only did Guildford City's recentCombined Counties Premier Division game against North Greenford not only coughed up a fizzling 4-4 draw, it also ended with a true modern classic of sporting photography being added to the canon.

In the act of celebrating one of Guildford's goals,press photographer Paul Burgmanalso managed to capture a little extra "team spirit" emanating from the showers in the background.

Borussia Monchengladbach Cash In On Twitter Banter With Launch Of Official ‘German Team’ Merchandise (Photo)

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It all started with a little light Twitter reparteebut now Borussia Monchengladbach have gone and fully adopted the new name given to them by a Glasgow pub a week or two ago.

Ahead of their Champions League tie against Celtic, Monchengladbach gave their seal of approval to a Glaswegian boozery that made several unsuccseful attempts to spell their name correctly on the chalk board outside.

Sweden: Gefle IF Celebrate Rare Away Win With ONE Fan Who Made 700-Mile Round Trip (Video)

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There were touching scenes after Gefle IF's win overKalmar FC in the Allsvenskan in midweek when the players made sure to celebrate their victory with the most important man in the stadium.

Second-bottom of the league going into the game, Gefle held out for an important 1-0 win after which the entire team made sure to share the moment with the one and only fan to have braved the cold and made the 700-mile round trip to watch his beloved side in action.

Shit Football Ink: Optimistic Newcastle Fan Gets ‘EFL Cup Winners’ Tattoo With Wrong Year (Photo)

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Despite the size of the club and its fan-base, Newcastle haven't had a sniff of success in quite some time.Not surprisingly, fans of the Magpies are desperate for a trophy, with one particularly optimistic member of the Toon Army making a bit of a mess of a celebratory tattoo after the club's battering of Preston in the EFL Cup.

EFL Cup: Referee Mike Dean Sniffs His Assistant Ahead Of Manchester Derby (Video)

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Mike Dean has worked long and hard to foster his reputation as English football's most... shall we say... 'flamboyant' referee.

Indeed, right from the early days, Dean has fully devoted himself to the pageantry of top-level officiating, with his ostentatious mannerisms and intrinsicsense of drama quickly becoming woven into the very fabric of the game.

CF Reus: Spanish Second Division Club Recreate Famous Album Covers To Promote Fixtures (Photos)

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In a bid to get bums on seats, newly-promoted Spanish second tier side CF Reus decided to get creative with their match promos.

Indeed, the Segunda Division side had their players recreate a series of famous album covers to help plug their fixtures throughout September and October.

While they're not quite on the same level asLewes FC, the results are still pretty darn good.

Police To Investigate Homophobic Song Sheet Distributed Among West Ham Fans Before Chelsea Match (Photo)

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As you're no doubt aware, West Ham's EFL Cup win over Chelsea last night was entirely marred as terrace etiquette circa 1975 was observed in the stands as clans of tribal troglodytes clashed at the Olympic Stadium.

Despite the best efforts of the stewards, coins were thrown, seats were torn up and innocent people were injured as pockets of fans brawled in and around the ground.

Real Sociedad Give Job To Homeless Man Who Had Been Sleeping Outside Their Stadium

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Photo: @marca/Twitter

Proving that the world isn't completely going to shit, Real Sociedad have given a job to a homeless man who had been sleeping outside their stadium.

According to MARCA, Sociedad have offered the 35-year-old man, known as Ruben, a place on the maintenancestaff at their Anoeta stadium in San Sebastian.

EFL Cup Quarter-Final Draw: Arsenal Host Southampton, Liverpool Face Leeds And Man Utd Set For West Ham Clash In Last Eight

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Wednesday night's draw for the EFL Cup quarter-finals has been kind to the three remaining heavyweights, after a night of action which saw Manchester Utd get one over on local rivals Manchester City, West Ham knock out Chelsea in east London and Southampton beat struggling Sunderland 1-0 at St. Mary's.

EFL Cup: Sofiane Boufal Bags Beauty As Southampton Down Sunderland At St. Mary’s (Video)

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David Moyes' nightmare season continued on Wednesday night, with his Sunderland side beaten 1-0 by Southampton at St. Mary's. The Black Cats'was even sent to the stands late on for protesting over a penalty that wasn't given.

However, the goal which gave Saints the win was a worthy winner, with Moroccan attacker Sofiane Boufal scoring a wonderful long-range effort on 66 minutes.

Copa Del Rey: Danilo Scores Superb 20-Yard Scissor Kick As Real Madrid Pulverise Cultural Leonesa (Video)

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Real Madrid's second string were forced to settle for just then seven goals in their Copa Del Rey demolition of Cultural Leonesa tonight.

Alvaro Morata and Marco Asensio both scored a brace apiece but it was back-up centre-back Danilo who scored the goal of the night slamming in an acrobatic effort from the edge of the box.

Ouch: Wrexham Boss Dean Keates Suffers Accidental Injury On First Day In New Job

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Photo: Daily Post

Havingmade well over 150 appearances and even captained the side as a player, Dean Keates was appointed as Wrexham's new manager on Tuesday.

The decision to hire the 38-year-old on a permanent basis was made just hours before the Welsh club's National League game against Barrow.

Faustino Asprilla Finally Gets Round To Launching His Own Range Of Condoms (Photos)

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Photo: @CondonesElTino/Twitter

Some two years in the making, Tino Asprilla has finally launches his very own brand of condoms.

After the concept was originally begun by one of his friends, the former Newcastle striker has thrown his girth behind a new line of 'Tino' sheaths available in his native Colombia.

‘It’s Hit With No Regard For Humanity’ – US Commentator Goes Wild Over Carli Lloyd Cracker For USWNT v Switzerland (Video)

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While the USA women's team clash with Switzerland happened a few days ago in Minneapolis, we thought this clip of both Carli Lloyd's cracking long-range strike and the accompanying bombastic commentary were still worth sticking up.

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Picking up the ball midway inside the Swiss half,reigning FIFA World Player of the Year Lloyd unleashed a rocket of a strike which arrowed into the top corner of the Swiss net.

Matchmaker: Middlesbrough ‘Keeper Victor Valdes Set To Launch New Dating App

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With actual playing time at a premium since moving to Middlesbrough, goalkeeper Victor Valdes has had to find other ways to keep himself occupied.

Indeed, the 35-year-old has partnered with students at theAutonomous University of Barcelona to develop his very own dating app called 'Hola' which is on the cusp of being launched into the public sphere.

RIP Carlos Alberto Torres – 14 Fantastic Photos Of Brazil’s Legendary Flying Full-Back In His Pomp

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Tuesday evening brought with it the sad news that Carlos Alberto, captain of Brazil's all-conquering 1970 World Cup team, passed away at the age of 72.

As well as scoring one of the most iconic goals of all time in the final of said tournament, Alberto was and forever will be cherished as true legend of the game the archetype of the modern flying full-back.

OGC Nice Auction Off Special Commemorative Shirts, Raise €121,500 For Victims Of Bastille Day Attack (Photo)

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Photo: @ogcnice/Twitter

In the aftermath of the Bastille Day terror attack in their home city, OGC Nice decided to play their next game against Rennes with both teams wearing special shirtsproduced in tribute to the 85 victims.

The plan was to auction off the jerseysafter the match in order to raise money for the families of the 85 people who lost their lives whilecelebrating the French public holiday on July 14th.

Man Utd: Jose Mourinho Reckons Paul Pogba Would Make ‘Phenomenal’ Central Defender

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With Paul Pogba still looking slightly unsure what he's been brought back to Manchester United to do, Jose Mourinho has added to the general air of confusion by declaring that he thinks his £89million man would make a "phenomenal" central defender.

Speaking to Sky Sports ahead of tonight's EFL Cup Mancunian derby, Mourinho said.

Mancunian Asda Staff Carve Brilliant Pumpkin Likenesses Of Pep Guardiola And Jose Mourinho (Photo)

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With the second Manchester derby of the season set to crack off in the EFL Cup tonight, the staff at a local supermarket have been busy geeing themselves up with a special Halloween-themed tribute.

Indeed, derby day is always a big deal for the workforce at the Asda store in Eastlands situated literally across the road from the Etihad Stadium with half of the staff hailing from the redside of the Mancunian divide and half from the blue.

BBC Survey Into Homophobia In Sport Finds 82% Of Football Fans Would Be Perfectly Happy To Support Openly Gay Players

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After conducting a study into homophobia in sport, the BBC have concluded that 82% of British football fans would have absolutely no issue with their club signing an openly gay player.

Alas, the online survey, as commissionedby BBC Radio 5 Liveand carried out by ComRes, also found that just under onefifth of fans would prefer gay players to keep their sexuality to themselves while 8% would stop watching their team entirely if they were to sign an openly gay player.

Serie A: Ex-Liverpool Defender Gabriel Paletta Sent Off For Feral Lunge As Milan Lose 3-0 In Genoa (Video)

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Gabriel Paletta may have failed to make the grade with Liverpool a decade ago, but the Argentine-born defender has managed to enjoy a decentcareer in Italy with Parma and Milan.

However, in Milan's Serie A clash with Genoa on Tuesday, with Italian international and his team-mates endured a poor evening, losing 3-0 after Paletta saw red for a dreadful lunge atLuca Rigoni.

Official: Wolves Part Company With Manager Walter Zenga After Just 87 Days

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This photograph was taken a mere 87 days ago, when everything in Wolverhampton Wanderers' garden was rosy.

Today, Wolveshave parted company with Walter Zenga after theclub'snew Chinese owners saw theirhefty pre-season investment manifestin a dour start to the season that leavesthem down in 18th place in the Championship and just four points above the dotted line o' doom.

Watford Face Possible Heavy Fine And/Or Point Deduction Over ‘Faked Bank Letter’

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Watford are reportedly staring down the barrel of a point deduction and/or fine after the Football League launched an investigationinvestigated into allegations the club supplied false financial information.

The Telegraph claim to have come into possession of a "forged bank letter"that wassubmitted when current owner Gino Pozzo took over the reigns atthe Hornets before the 2014/15 season.

Tottenham: Noted Spaghetti Enthusiast Victor Wanyama Wishes You A Happy World Pasta Day! (Photo)

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It's fairly common knowledge that anthropology scholars maintain the human race reached its evolutionarypeak when at precisely 4:45pm on Monday 7th May, 2012, Victor Wanyama birthed the following Tweet into the world...

I had spaghetti and it was very nice i enjoyed it

— Victor Wanyama (@VictorWanyama) May 7, 2012

He had some spaghetti.

Rosario Central Fans Lay On Enormous, Chaotic Welcome For Players Ahead Of Local Derby (Video)

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Sunday afternoon saw Rosario Central pitted against their eternal cross-cityfoes Newell's Old Boys in the first 'Clasico Rosarino' of the Argentinian Primera Division season.

As is to be expected, the Rosario fans laid on one holy hell of an entrance for their team as they emerged from the (giant inflatable) tunnel, with utter pandemonium breaking loose as the players came barrelling out onto the pitch.

Middlesbrough Confirm Adama Traore Didn’t Break Any Premier League Speed Records After All

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As you may be aware,Adama Traore caused a minor ripple in the waters over the weekend when the Middlesbrough winger was adjudged to have broken the record for the fastest sprint ever recorded in the Premier League.

Indeed, thanks to a few premature Tweets, it wasn't long before everybodywas hailing ournew king of velocity the fastest man in Premier League history.

15 Weird, Wonderful And/Or Scarcely Believable Ballon d’Or Nominees From Over The Years

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With the Ballon d'Or long-list pumped out yesterday, Pies thought we'd have a look at some of the stranger names to have received nominations over the years.

We've only included nominees dating from1990 onwards, specifically because we couldn't be bothered to trawl back any further than that.

‘I Was A Footballer, So I Know How To Behave On Pitch’ – Chelsea Boss Antonio Conte Hits Back At Jose Mourinho Over Post-Match Moan

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Antonio Conte has hit back at Jose Mourinho after the Manchester United manager'spost-match moan following the Red Devils capitulation at Stamford Bridge on Sunday.

At the final whistle of the game which saw Chelsea batter United 4-0, Mourinho had a word in Conte's ear, apparently criticising him for trying to get the home fans more animated in the final minutes of the match.

Papiss Cisse: Ex-Newcastle Dud Scores Semi-Amazing, Semi-Absurd Goal In Chinese Super League (Video)

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Who'd have thunk it? Turns out that Papiss Cisse isn't a cumbersome flail-artist. He's actually the greatest, most sublimely talented forward of our and any othergeneration you care to mention.

After fooling us all into assuming he was a bit of a donkey at Newcastle, Cisse went and shattered our collective illusion by scoring with a truly sublime piece of technical skill for Shangdong in the Chinese Super League over the weekend.

Ballon d’Or Shortlist Unveiled: All The Usual Suspects Plus Light Smattering Of Total Frauds

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It's that time of year again. The annual creep towards the Ballon d'Or gala officially begins today with the announcement of the 2016 long-short-list.

For reasons of their own, award administratorsFrance Football decided to leak the list in five-player increments over the course of the entire day, milking the whole thing for all it was worth.

Sunderland: Jack Rodwell Has Now Gone Three-And-A-Half Years Without Winning A Game He’s Started In

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With Saturday afternoon's 93rd-minute defeat against West Ham still smarting, Jack Rodwell bared his soul and admitted that Sunderland have gone "a bit backwards" since David Moyes took over at the start of the season.

He's not wrong either. Under Sam Allardyce, the Black Cats preserved their Premier Leaguestatus against the odds last season by ending with a run of one defeat in their final 11 games.

Gary Neville Aims Another Subtle Dig In Liverpool’s Direction With Pithy Tweet From Inside Anfield (Photo)

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Despite fostering anuneasy truce with ex-foe Jamie Carragher for professional purposes, there can be little doubt that, down in his very waters, Gary Neville is still a card-carrying member of the Manchester Unitedmilitia.

Indeed, Comrade Neville took the opportunity to aim yet another barb at Liverpool on Twitter, pithily correcting the club's grammar after happening upon a motivational slogan on the walls of the hospitality suiteatAnfield.

MLS: New England Revolution Striker Kei Kamara Shown Yellow Card For Twerking (Video)

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Yesterday was 'Decision Day' over in MLS i.e, the last day of the regular season in which teams make their final, desperate play to reach the play-offs, etc.

Needing to overturn a largegoal differencedisparity to sneak into the play-offs themselves, New England Revolution could only manage a 3-0 win over Montreal Impact.

Golden Boy: Renato Sanches Pips Marcus Rashford, Dele Alli And Alex Iwobi To Win 2016 Award

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Photo: FC Bayern/A. Pretty/Getty Images/@tuttosport/Twitter

Renato Sanches has pipped the likes of Marcus Rashford, Alex Iwobi, Dele Alli and Demarai Gray to be crowned as the winner of the 2016 Golden Boy award.

Despite the naff name, the Golden Boy is a fairly prestigious award, with the annual shortlist comprising of the 40 best players under the age of 21 (and registered at European clubs) according to Italian newspaper Tuttosport.

Serious Fowl Play: Ludogrets ‘Keeper Loses Battle Of Wits With Pitch-Invading Duck (Video)

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The Bulgarian top flight game between Ludogorets andLokomotiv Gorna Oryahovitsa had to be temporarily halted on Saturday amid scenes of a decidedly fowl nature.

With the home side 1-0 up, play was brought to a grinding stoppage when a feathery fiend descended from the night skyto claim the playing surface as his own.

Football Tat Of Yesteryear: Liverpool Offer Fans ‘Limited Edition Team Trainers’, Circa 1994 (Photo)

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"I've ordered us a pair each lads. They're in the post!"

Culminating in a 2-1defeat against Aston Villa, Liverpool muddled through a fairly average season in 1993/94, finishing way down in 8th place in the Premier League and being knocked out of both the FA andCoca Colacupsin the third and fourth round respectively.

Encroyable! French Commentators Go Nuts After Moussa Dembelé Nets Winner For Celtic v Rangers In League Cup Semi-Final (Video)

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Celtic came out on top in Sunday's Old Firm derby at Hampden, with a last-gasp Moussa Dembelé goal securing the win for the Bhoys against fierce rivals Rangers.

Whuile the goal itsef from the French striker was dramatic enough, the commentary from L'Equipe's French TV coverage was incredible.

‘Jose Still Knows How To Get Best Out Of Chelsea’ – Ex-Blues Star Eidur Gudjohnsen Trolls Mourinho After Man Utd Lose 4-0 At Stamford Bridge

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Joe Mourinho's return to Stamford Bridge as an opposition manager ended in humiliation for the former Chelsea boss, with his Manchester United team humbled by their hosts courtesy of a 4-0 battering.

Not surprisingly, the result piqued the interest of 'Einsteins' throughout the world of social media, with one of Mourinho's former players, Icelandic attacker Eidur Gudjohnsen posting a cheeky Tweet.

La Liga: Kevin-Prince Boateng Notches After Las Palmas Combine Spectacularly To Score Insane Goal Against Villarreal (Video)

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A goal from Kevin-Prince Boateng put Las Palmas ahead against Villarreal, though the former Portsmouth midfielder's acrobaticfinishwas just the proverbial tip of theabsolutely outrageous iceberg that was the build-up.

The move began with a bit of back-and-forth passing on the edge of the box before and you'll have to excuse the technical jargon here all holy hell broke loose!

Galled Stones: Man City Defender Gaffe Helps Southampton To Surprise Point At Etihad (Video)

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Manchester City's winless run was extended to five games on Sunday, with Pep Guardiola's side held to a 1-1 draw by Southampton at tna Etihad.

Individual errors blighted the Citizens in their midweek Champions League drubbing by Barcelona, and it was a major error by centre-half John Stones which handed Saints the first goal of Sunday's game.

Tottenham: Moussa Sissoko Faces Retrospective Ban Over Sneaky Elbow On Bournemouth’s Harry Arter (Video)

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It's fair to say that Tottenham fans are still feeling a little short-changed over summersigning Moussa Sissoko, who has yet to prove that he's worth anywhere near the £30million the club paid for him in August.

Indeed, Sissokohas been used sparingly ever since his arrival, with his sixth appearance of the season also likely to be his last for some while.

NASL: New York Cosmos Midfielder Danny Szetela Proposes To Girlfriend With An Assist From The Crowd (Photos)

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While he may have only played a bit part in New York Cosmos' 4-0 trouncing of FC Miami over the weekend, midfielder Danny Szetela still emerged from the game with the most impressive stat of all: a 100% proposal conversion rate.

Indeed, immediately after the final whistle, Szetela took his girlfriend out onto the pitch and, with an assist from his cronies in the terraces, got down on one knee and popped the question.

Modern Football Is Rubbish: Hull City Use Advertising Boards To Tell Fans Which Songs To Sing (Photos)

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The latest addition tothe 'modern football is rubbish' canon comes from Hull City, who laid on a catastrophe of nigh-on MLS-esque proportions for yesterday's home game against Stoke City at the KCOM Stadium.

Sadly, the fans in attendance were subjected to horrors far beyond a 2-0 home defeat when the club started using the interactive advertising hoardings to flash upthe lyrics to songs and chants they wanted singing.

Sunderland: Victor Anichebe Makes Mess Of Banal Post-Match Tweet With ‘Copy And Paste’ Gaffe (Photo)

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Having made little-to-no impact since signing for Sunderland at the start of September, Victor Anichebe catapulted himself back into the public conscience with a textbook social media gaffe in the aftermath of his side's 1-0 defeat against West Ham on Sunday.

With Sunderland keen to keep fans on side as they continue to prop up the Premier League, somebody inside the club obviously asked Anichebe if he'd mind putting out some kind ofanodyne platitude about the performance something in the typical'disappointed with the result/thelads done well' vein.

FAIL: Wisła Płock’s Giorgi Merebashvili Provides Contender For Miss Of The Season In Polish Top-Flight (Video)

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In a clash between two of the Polish top-tiers' struggling side on Saturday,Wisła Płock lost 2-1 at home toGórnik Łęczna. However the hosts should've scored at least one more goal, only forattacking midfielderGiorgi Merebashvilito register one of the worst misses of the season so far.

Leicester: Christian Fuchs Nets Humdinger As Foxes Beat Crystal Palace 3-1 (Video)

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While Leicester City continue to make light work of their first Champions League campaign, the Premier League champions have, rather inevitably, struggled domestically to hit the highs of last season.

However, against Crystal Palace on Saturday, Clauido Ranieir's side were back to their best, with full-back Christian Fuch's long-range piledriver the icing on the cake of an impressive 3-1 win against the Eagles.

‘It’s Not As Easy As It Looks’ – Arsene Wenger Reveals What He Plans To Tell God On Judgement Day

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With Arsene Wenger turning 67 on the day of Arsenal's game against Middlesbrough, the wizenedold sagehas been meditating on the nature of age, mortality and the indefatigable march of time.

Speaking to the press ahead of the match, Wenger was asked how he felt about being the Premier League's oldest manager.

Non-League: Chilwell FC Currently Have An Ever So Slightly Embarrassing Shirt Sponsor (Photo)

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While the Premier League behemoths continue to attract similarly lucrative commercial deals from around the world, their lowly non-league counterparts are forced to take whatever they can get in the way of revenue.

Now, we're not saying that Chilwell FC (of the Long Eaton Sunday League) aren't an enticing prospect for corporate partners, but their current shirt sponsor suggests that they probably weren't inundated with offers when they put it out to tender.

La Liga: Neymar Hit With Bottle After Barcelona Secure Last-Gasp Win v Valencia (Video)

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It took a last-gasp penalty from Lionel Messi to give Barcelona a hard-fought 3-2 away to Valencia at the Mestalla on Saturday. However, that winning goal triggered some rather igly scenes, with some of the fans launching bottles at the celebrating Barca players.

Messi's winner, in the 94th minute of the game, was his second of the game for Barcelona.

Inter Milan: Mauro Icardi’s Controversial Autobiography To Be Reprinted After Sparking Hostile Fan Revolt

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The author of Mauro Icardi's autobiography has said that he is planning to "reprint" the book after controversial passages from the Inter Milan captain's tome sparked a spitefulfan revolt.

Speaking in the book, Icardi referenced an altercation with the Inter ultras after an away game against Sassuolo in 2015.

Ipswich And Newcastle To Join Forces And Celebrate ‘Sir Bobby Robson Day’ When Two Teams Meet At Portman Road Next Year

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Ipswich Town and Newcastle United have agreed to buddy up and lay ona tandem tribute toSir Bobby Robson when the two teams meet at Portman Road next year.

A legendary figure at both clubs, the Easter Monday match (April 17th) will be turned into one big celebration of Robson's life and times, with members of his family also invited along as special guests for the occasion.

‘True Highlight Of The Night’ – Juan Mata Chuckles About Bashing His Face On Floor During Man Utd’s Win Over Fenerbahce

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After an opening half-hour of trudge, two successfully converted penalties in the space of two minutes saw Manchester United take the upper hand in their 4-1 win over Fenerbahce in the Europa League on Thursday evening.

The first spot-kick came about when Juan Mata pulled Michael Carrick's long through-ball out of the ether with a lovely first touch only to be gently bundled over in the boxby Fener defender Simon Kjaer.

‘You Are The Best No.9’ – Patrice Evra Buries Hatchet By Congratulating Luis Suarez On ‘Golden Shoe’ Award Win

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Patrice Evra has sought to bury the hatchet with old foe Luis Suarez by congratulating the Barcelona striker on winning the Golden Shoe award by branding him "the best No.9" in the world.

Suarez was bestowed with the MARCA-sponsored award for scoring more goals than anyone else in Europe over the course of the 2015/16 season.

The Sun Call For Gary Lineker To Be Sacked By BBC For ‘Peddling Lies’ About Child Refugees In Calais

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The Sun have gone and made Gary Lineker the focus of their opprobrium this morning after the Match of the Day host hadthe temerity to show the slightest whiff of compassion for the people caught up in the current refugee crisis.

Earlier in the week, Lineker made the grievous error of emitting a Tweet that expressed his concern over the nature of the language and rhetoric being used to describe immigrants and refugees particularly the unaccompanied children in the 'Jungle' camp in Calais.

Europa League: Paul Pogba Scores Stunner As Man Utd Cruise Past Fenerbahce (Video)

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Megabucks summer-signing Paul Pogba was the star of the show for Manchester United on Thursday night, with the Frenchman netting a brace as Manchester United cruised to a 4-1 win against Fenerbahce.

Embed from Getty Images

With Wayne Rooney in the starting XI, the Red Devils struggled to create much in the first-half until the visitors gave away two penalties.

Reports: Harry Redknapp Somehow ‘Runs Over His Own Wife’ During Shopping Trip In Bournemouth

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Coming somewhat out of the blue, it's being reported that Harry Redknapp somehow managed to "run his own wife over" in an incident on Wednesday morning.

Having dropped his wife Sandra, 69, off at the shops in the Westbourne area of Bournemouth, Redknapp pulled off his Range Rover only to swiftly find that her coat and foot were both trapped in the door jamb.

NASL: Veteran Schemer Joe Cole Nets 25-Yard Screamer For Tampa Bay Rowdies (Video)

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A three-time Premier League champion with Chelsea, much-travelled midfielder Joe Cole is currently playing his trade with Tampa Bay Rowdies in the North American Soccer League.

On Wednesday, the 34-year-old produced a bit of trademark magic during his side's clash with title-chasers Indy Eleven.

‘I Might Still Be There If Sir Alex Didn’t Retire’ – Robin Van Persie Gets All Misty-Eyed About His Man Utd Exit

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This might prove to be difficult reading for some Arsenal fans of a sensitive disposition.

According to the man himself, there could well be a parallel universe in which Robin van Persie is still lining up for Manchester United, rather than against them.

With his Fenerbahce side in town for the Europa League tonight, Van Persieis returning toOld Trafford to face his former club for the first time sincehe left for Turkeyin the summer of 2015.

Mark Lawrenson Has Concocted An Interesting Theory About Wayne Rooney’s Rapid Decline

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The prolonged and pronounced waningof Wayne Rooney's powers has proved to be something a hot topic of late, with the bottomed-outform of the Manchester United and England captain confounding and incensing fans and neutrals alike.

Meanwhile, Rooney's flat performances have been greeted with staunch denial from pundits, former teammates and other assorted ex-professionals, who have all shown a distinctly strange, almost hive-mind reluctance to weigh in on the issue.

Bristol Rovers: Charlie Colkett Sparks Dramatic Comeback Against MK Dons With Resplendent Back-Heel Throughball (Video)

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Despite finding themselves 3-1 down with just a couple ofminutes left to play, Bristol Rovers tussled their way back to claim a dramatic 3-3 draw againstMK Dons in midweek.

However, Rovers came away with the aesthetic victory, largely thanks to an exquisite little touch from midfielder Charlie Colkett in the build up to Matt Taylor's 87th minute goal.

‘I Couldn’t Eat For Two Days’ – Jerome Boateng Describes What Losing A Champions League Final Feels Like

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In all honesty, since passing 30, there's a fairly slim chance that Pies will ever find ourselves draftedfor a Champions League final.

There. It feels incredibly catharticto say it out loud. Maybe now we can come to terms with it and move on.

To be perfectly honest, listening to Bayern Munich defender Jerome Boateng recountthe pain of losing out to Chelsea in the 2012 showpiece, we're not entirely sure we're overly fussed aboutmissing out.

Champions League: Ozil Nets First-Ever Hat-Trick As Arsenal Put Six Past Ludogorets Razgrad (Photos & Highlights)

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While fellow Premier League pace-setters Man City endureda torrid time in Barcelona, Arsenal strolled to victory at the Emirates againstLudogorets Razgrad,putting six past the Bulgarian minnows.

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The game was crammed full of a superb goals as the Gunners took their opponents apart.

Champions League: Man City Mauled By Barcelona As Bravo Sees Red And Messi Bags Hat-Trick (Photos & Highlights)

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Pep Guardiola endured a horror night at the Camp Nou on Wednesday, as he watched his old side Barcelona batter Manchester City via a 4-0 scoreline.

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With Sergio Aguero on the bench, the Citizens were still competitive in the first-half. However, aslip from Fernandinho allowed Lionel Messi to nab his first of the night on 17 minutes.

Riyad Mahrez Goal Against Copenhagen Ensures Leicester Maintain 100% Start To Life In Champions League (Video)

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Leicester City just about maintained their impressive 100% start to their maiden Champions League campaign with a slim 1-0 victory over FC Copenhagen at the King Power.

A single goal from Riyad Mahrez proved enough to make it three wins from three for the Foxes, thus moving them to within one more victoryof sealing a place in the knockouts.

CSKA Moscow ‘Keeper Igor Akinfeev Becomes Owner Of Astounding (And Completely Unwanted) Champions League Clean Sheet Record

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Last night, CSKA Moscow goalkeeper Igor Akinfeev became the proud custodian of a truly astounding Champions League record.

With CSKA leading Monaco by a goal to nil, it looked as though Akinfeev was about to keep aclean sheet in the competition for the first time in almost a decade.

Ladies and gents: CSKA Moscow's Igor Akinfeev closing in on his first Champions League clean sheet in nearly 10 years.

Photoshoppers Of The World Unite: Cristiano Ronaldo Roundly Mocked After Flexing Next To His Lambo (Photos)

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Photo: cristiano/Instagram

Cristiano Ronaldo has been widely panned after celebrating Real Madrid's 5-1 tonking of Legia Warsaw by showing off hisLamborghini on social media.

The Portuguese plonker wished his legions of followers 'bom dia' while posing ever so subtly in front of his supercar.

Samuel Eto’o Makes Absurd €100,000 Wager With Disgruntled Antalyaspor Fan

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Having struggled to win over the fans atAntalyaspor since his arrival last year, Samuel Eto'o has decided to front up and put his money where his mouth is.

Indeed, the 35-year-old striker has made aconsiderablewager with a disgruntledfan that the team will finish in the Top 10 of the Turkish Super Lig this season.

Jermaine Jenas Reveals He Turned Down ‘Weird’ Offer From Man Utd Before Joining Newcastle In 2002

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Jermaine Jenas has revealed that he turned down a 'weird'approach from Manchester United before he signed for Newcastle in the summer of 2002.

Having played his way up through the ranks and impressed during his debut senior season at hometown club Nottingham Forest, the Premier League vultures were circling as Uniteds Manchester, Leeds and Newcastle all expressed an interest in procuring the 18-year-old.

Celtic: Five-Year-Old Fan Calls Brendan Rodgers To Apologise For Missing Home Match

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A five-year-old Celtic fan called the club to apologise for not being able to make it to Saturday's game against Motherwell.

While usually in attendance at Celtic Park, wee Louis Kayes was forced to miss the game as it clashed with one of his young friend's birthday party.

Speaking on BBC Radio Scotland, Louis' mum Lisa said that the youngster was mortified when he realised he wouldn't be able to go to the game and used her phone to make a personal apology to everybody at his beloved club.

Champions League: Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang Nets Superb Silky Strike For Dortmund v Sporting (Video)

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Coveted by Real Madrid and just about every other major club in Europe, Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang was at his sublime best once again in Dortmund's Champions League clash with Sporting, netting a gorgeous goal for the Germans.

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The 27-year-oldstriker raced on to a pass fromMario Gotze before rocketing past theSporting defenderand finally, neatly lifting the ball over goalkeeper Rui Patricio.

Champions League: Hugo Lloris Makes Stunning Save From Chicharito As Tottenham Draw Away To Leverkusen (Video)

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One of the best goalkeepers on the planet, Hugo Lloris produced a man of the match performance for Tottenham on Tuesday night, helping the north Londoners to a hard-earned point away to Bayer Leverkusen.

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Leverkusen looked dangerous throughout the game, but Lloris stood firm.

Football Art: Graphic Untd Design Series Of App-Themed Fantasy Kits For Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Etc (Photos)

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Ever wondered what it might look like when Facebook's office football teamsquare off against their Airbnbcounterparts after work on a Thursday night?

Well, wonder no more compadres, for the good people at Graphic Untd have spent their recent weeks drafting up a series of fantasy kits for a whole raft of different apps.

Arsenal Install Fancy New ‘Injury Reducing’ Training Pitch In Desperate Attempt To Curb The Tweaks And Twangs

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Ever the pioneers, Arsenal have become the first Premier League club to install a brand new "injury-reducing" pitch at their training complex.

Besieged by relentless twangs and tweaks, the Gunners have enlisted French company Natural Grass to fit one of their space age'Air Fibr' pitches at London Colney.

In The Name Of Realism, Football Manager 2017 Includes Full Simulation Of The Effects Of Brexit

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Just when you thought it couldn't possibly get any more immersive, it's been revealed that Brexit and the effects thereof are included in the latest edition of Football Manager.

As confirmed by Sports Interactive chief Miles Jacobson, Brexit is programmed to trigger around "two to ten years" into yourgame, with the aftershock of Britain's departure from the European Union unstable transfer markets and exchange rates, work permit issues, etc coming into play the following year.

‘Black Eagles Always Soar High!’ – Besiktas Proudly Show Off Their Snazzy New Team Plane (Photo)

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Photo: @BesiktasEnglish/Twitter

Thanks to their friends at Turkish Airlines, Besiktas have gone and bagged themselves an ultra snazzy new team runaround to get them to away fixtures.

While other, lesser teams have to make do with a corny old bus, the Black Eagles now have official club transport befitting their (nick)name.

Lyon: Rafael Da Silva Refused To Get Paid While Recovering From Injury, Donated Wages To Charity Instead

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As if you didn't think that Rafael da Silva was a loveable little scamp anyway, it's been revealed that theex-Manchester Unitedfull-back madea lovely charitable gesture after tearing his thigh muscle last season.

After succumbing to the injury while playing for Lyon in September of 2015, Rafaelspecifically asked to meet with the Ligue 1 club's top brass and request that he not receive any salary while he was sidelined.

Mauro Icardi: Inter Milan Ultras Leave ‘Bastard’ Banner Outside Striker’s House As Volatile Feud Continues (Photo)

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As you may be aware, Mauro Icardi is not exactly what you might call flavour of the week at Inter Milan at the moment as the Argentine strikerfinds himself embroiled in a bitter feud with a section of the supporters.

It all began when Icardi criticised Inter ultras in his new autobiography, specifically in reference to an incident after an away game against Sassuolo in 2015 afterwhich he supposedly became a "hero" to his teammates by squabbling witha few gobby fans.

‘Is This Real Or Am I Dreaming?’ – Ousman Manneh Scores First Goal For Werder Bremen, Two Years After Arriving In Germany As A Refugee

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Ousman Manneh on his arrival at Werder Bremen, 2015

There were cockle-warming scenes in Germany over the weekend as Werder Bremen beat Bayer Leverkusen at the Weserstadion on Saturday afternoon.

You see, one of Bremen's goalscorers was young Ousman Manneh, a 19-year-old striker from Gambia, a tiny and poverty-stricken nation on the western coast of Africa that has been ruled by an erratic dictator who has been in place since Manneh was born.

‘I’d Train Then Eat Cake And Drink Coke’ – Man City Forward Nolito Details Intense Fitness Regime During His Barcelona Days

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With a big midweek Champions League match against his former sidepending, Man City forward Nolito has been discussing the three seasons he spent at Barcelona as a younger man.

Having been nurtured by current Barcelona coach Luis Enrique while plugging away in the Catalan club's youth and reserve teams, Nolito has nothing but gratitude for the man who convinced him to put down the extra-curricular gateaux and instead start focusing on fulfilling his potential.

Retro Football Songs: Phil Collins And Genesis Sing Loving Ode To ‘Match Of The Day’, 1977 (Video)

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The year is 1977 and, three years after the departure of Peter Gabriel, Genesis are gradually beginning to morph from pastoralprog-rockers into the sleek, pop-veneered behemoth they would eventually become.

Slap, bang in the middle of thatperiod of flux, the band, now fronted by Phil Collins, knocked out a largely unheralded, mostly forgotten ode to that most vaunted of English sporting bastions, Match of the Day.

David De Gea Thwarts Philippe Coutinho With Stunning Save As Man Utd Draw With Liverpool At Anfield (Video)

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After all the "Red Monday" hype. Liverpool's Monday night clash with Manchester United at Anfield was a disappoitning affair with the Red Devils producing a classic Jose Mourinho spoiling display.

However, Jurgen Klopp's Reds did go close, with Philippe Coutinho forcing David De Gea into an outstanding save midway through the second-half.

Match-Winner Jose Holebas And Etienne Capoue Argue On Pitch After Watford Beat Middlesbrough 1-0 (Video)

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Jose Holebas was the match-winner for Watford away to Middlesbrough on Sunday. However, at full-time, instead of celebrating the Hornets' victory, the goal-scorer found himself in the middle of a serious argument with team-mate Etienne Capoue.

Holebas' strike, the only goal of the game, came soon after the break, with thethe Greek full-back firing past Victor Valdes in the Boro' goal in the second-half.

Arsenal: Granit Xhaka Sees Red For Cynical Swipe On Modou Barrow But Gunners Hold Out To Beat Swansea 3-2 (Video)

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Granit Xhaka endured a bit of a nightmare on Saturday against Swansea at the Emirates, with Arsenal's big-money summer signing gifting the Swans a goal before seeing red for a silly swipe atModou Barrow.

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The Gunners started well, with two close-range Theo Walcott goals putting the hosts 2-0 up within 33 minutes.

Crystal Palace: Selhurst Park Ballboy Hurries Up West Ham ‘Keeper Adrian As Eagles Lose London Derby (Video)

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Crystal Palace lost their fifth home top-flight London derby in a row on Saturday, with the Eagles going down 1-0 to West Ham in a game which saw Christian Benteke balloon a penalty high, wide and not very handsome.

As the final whistle loomed, the frustration around Selhurst Park grew, with one of the ballboys even taking things into his own hands as the Hammers tried to slow the game down.

Championship: Ross Wallace Pinches Huddersfield Tactics Sheet As Sheffield Wednesday Win Sunday Clash (Video)

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Huddersfield missed the chance to go back to the top of the Championship on Sunday, losing 1-0 at home to Sheffield Wednesday. The Owls worked hard throughout the game, with Ross Wallace even nicking a sheet of paper containing the Owls' tactics at one point.

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The incident involving Scottish winger Wallace occured when Huddersfield defender passed on a sheet of instructions from the bench to fellow German Elias Kachunga.

Charlton Athletic: Play Stopped In First Minute As Fans Protest By Releasing Hundreds Of ‘Greedy’ Pigs Onto The Pitch (Video)

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Photo: @TheODDSBible/Twitter

Just as they threatened to do in the week, Charlton Athletic and Coventry City fans banded together to interrupt the early knockings of the two sides' League One match in protest over the current ownership of their respective clubs.

The protest entailed hundreds of 'greedy' little pigs being chucked onto the pitch, which caused the tie to be halted in the very first minute.

Chelsea: Fringe Players Unite As Nathaniel Chalobah Provides Immaculate Back-Heel Assist For Victor Moses (Video)

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Chelseasauntered to a 3-0 win over reigning champions Leicester City in the Premier League, with goals from Diego Costa, Eden Hazard and Victor Moses proving to be the difference at Stamford Bridge.

Withthe lion's share of the damage done before half-time, the Blues had to wait until the 80th minute to add their third and final goal asthe hitherto fringe pairing of Nathaniel Chalobah and Victor Moses combined to devastating effect on the edge of the Leicester box.

Ex-Man Utd Midfielder Park Ji Sung Turns Out For Leicester De Montfort University Student Football Team (Photos)

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After enrolling himself on an international masters degree in sport management at Leicester De Montfort University (DMU) last month, it was only a matter of time before Park Ji-Sung found himself press-ganged into turning out for the studentfootball team.

Sure enough, the former Manchester United midfielder (and four-time Premier League winner) made his debut for the MA students' XI a few days ago in a game against a team of staff members hand-picked by DMUvice-chancellor Dominic Shellard.

Gerard Pique Reveals How He First Wooed Shakira With A Bit Of Rubbish Weather Chat

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Gerard Pique has revealed the sweet little exchange that broke the ice and eventually led to him shacking up with noted Pies fan Shakira.

Waffling on in an interview with Spanish broadcasters TV3, the Barcelona centre-half discussed how the couple, who now have two kids,first got together at the 2010 World Cup.

Adorable Scenes As Argentinian Kid Stops Youth Match To Tie Up Opponent’s Boot Laces (Video)

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There was a sudden outbreak of acute adorableness during a recent youth game in Cordoba, Argentina, when one young player brought a halt to proceedings in order to do his opponent a solid.

Noticing a potentially hazardous stray bootlace, a youngsterplaying for FCCorazon de Maria thought nothing of delayinga corner in order to tie it up.

Tottenham: Heung Min Son Becomes First Asian Player To Win Premier League Player Of The Month (Photo)

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Congratulations are due to Heung-min Son who, after a rollicking few weeks for Tottenham, has been bestowed with the Premier League 'Player of the Month' award for September.

After enduring a patchy debut season last time out, Son came raring out of the blocks this season scoring four goals over the course of Septemberto helpSpurs on their ascent to second in the table.

Gerard Pique Fondly Reminisces About The Time He ‘Pranked’ Patrice Evra By Torching His Personal Belongings

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More from Gerard Pique now, with the Barcelona defender's fond memories of the time and effort he used to devote to being a brutal sociopathpranking his chums in his younger years.

As part of his all-encompassing interview with Catalan broadcasters TV3, Pique was asked what he misses most about his time at Manchester United.

Puma Celebrate 48th Birthday Of Their Iconic ‘King’ Boot By Creating Special Chocolate Versions (Photos)

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To mark their trusty old flagship boot makingit into a 48th consecutive year of production, Puma have released a special edition hand-made version of the King.

Indeed, Puma have commissioned a beautiful 'Made in Italy' version of the King which is exactly that hand-stitched and crafted in Italy by artisan shoemakers.

18-Year-Old Barnet ‘Keeper Kai McKenzie-Lyle Scores On International Debut For Guyana (Video)

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We do love the sight of a goalkeeper making a desperate surge into the opposition box in search of a late goal. During Guyana's World Cup qualifier with neighbours Suriname, Barnet youngster Kai McKenzie-Lyle did just that and managed to score in the process.

The 18-year Barnet development squad'keeper was making his debut for Guyana in their 2017 Gold Cup qualifier away toSuriname.

Hull City: Tigers Finally Name Mike Phelan As Permanent Head Coach

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After being in temporary charge since Steve Bruce's departure in the summer, Mike Phelan has finally been giving the Hull City job on a permanent basis.

The 54-year-old enjoyed a good start to the 2016/17 Premier League campaign with Hull, following wins against title-holders Leicester and then Swansea.

Argentinian Lower League Team Ordered To Correct Irregular Pitch After 30 Years Of Wonk

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Photo via AP

Despite it being deemed perfectly fit for purpose for the last three decades, an Argentinian fifth-tier club have been ordered to correct their famously wonky home pitch.

It would appear that everybody involved atClub Social Deportivo Linierswasperfectly awarethat their pitch was cock-eyed,with club president Marcelo Gomez claiming that the suits at the Argentine Football Association (AFA) only cottoned on when they happened across aerial images of the ground on Google Maps recently.

Chelsea: Nike Announce Whopping New £60m Kit Deal As Blues Terminate Adidas Contract Six Years Early

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Word on the wire is that Nike have paid through the nose to secure themselves a kit supply deal with Chelsea, starting as of next season.

As per ESPN sports business reporter Darren Rovell, Nike have chucked $70million (around £60million) at Chelsea to land the deal, thus bringing an end to the Blues' existing deal with Adidas some six years early.

Reports: Celtic And Rangers Mull Prospect Of Joining ‘Atlantic League’ With Top Teams From Belgium, Holland, Denmark, Norway And Sweden

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As you may recall, any talk of Scottish giants Celtic and Rangers making their long-mooted move south ofthe border was comprehensively ended recently when theFootball League issued a ruling against theincorporationof any further non-English sides joining the Englishfootball system.

Desperate to free themselves from the restrictive financial shackles of competing in the Scottish league, it would appear that the Old Firm teams are now looking to their North European brethren for the answer.

‘Leave! For The Love Of God, Leave!’ – Argentine Commentator Loses It After Sergio Aguero Fluffs Spot-Kick Against Paraguay (Video)

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Argentina's recent international woes continued this week, with theAlbiceleste losing to Paraguay in the World Cup qualfiers, a result which leaves the South American giants outside the automatic qualification places for 2018.

Not surprisingly, the football-mad locals are less than impressed, with a number of commentators unable to hide their frustration, particularly after Sergio Aguero's feeble penalty miss against the Paraguayans.

Young Fulham Fan Posts £3 To Midfielder Tom Cairney As ‘Thank You’ For Recent Performances (Photo)

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Fulham midfielder Tom Cairney has revealed that he received a tidy little bonus through the post after one young supporter saw fit to reward him for his recent performances.

The young season-ticket holder wrote to Cairney to ask his advice on "doing bicycle kicks", "how to get the ball" and how to do "good kicks" before chucking £3 at the 25-year-old as a "thank-you" for playing well so far this season.

Diego Maradona Gets Into Slanging Match With Juan Veron During The Pope’s ‘Match For Peace’ (Video)

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The great and good of the football world turned out in Rome last night to play their respective parts in a charity football match organised by The Pope.

Unfortunately, it would appearthat Diego Maradona and Juan Sebastian Veron didn't get the memo vis-a-vis the whole 'Match for Peace' concept, with the Argentinian pair bringingthe first half to a close with a good old fashioned slanging match.

Krasnodar Test Out Brilliant 360° LED Video Wall At Their New Stadium (Video)

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(Photo: Vitaly TimkivTASS/Getty Images)

Inspired by the Colloseum in Rome, Russian side FC Krasnodar have recently completed the process of building themselves a flashy new stadium.

The ground has already staged its first match (Russia's recent friendly against Costa Rica)thoughstrangely it won't be utilised at the upcoming 2018 World Cup.

Liverpool Introduce £40,000 Salary Cap For Youth Players In Effort To Curb ‘Too Much, Too Young’ Syndrome

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Liverpool are about to enforce a new salary cap on their youth players in an effort to stave off the "too much, too young" culture that permeates the upper echelons of the professional game.

According to the Telegraph, the club will not allow players under the age of 17 to earn more than £40,000 in their first season as a professional.

Man Utd And Liverpool Issue Joint Statement Asking Fans To Behave Themselves Ahead Of Monday Night Meeting

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Manchester United and Liverpool have put their heads together and issued a joint statement pleading with fans to behave themselves during the upcoming Premier League meeting between the two sides.

With the bitter rivals set to square off in the Premier League at Anfield next Monday night, the two clubs have buddied up in an attempt to promote a bit of harmony and civility between the two tribes

The following statement has been posted on the official websites of both clubs:

Both clubs, their supporters and football fans around the world are looking forward to this historic and passionate match between two of the sport's biggest and oldest rivals.

The ‘Giant Toilet’ That George Best Built: Retrotastic Look Around Man Utd Legend’s 1969 Dream House (Photos)

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Back in 1969, aged 23 and at the peak of his celebrity, Manchester United star George Best decided to shovel around £35,000 into building his 'dream house' in Bramhall, near Stockport, Greater Manchester.

The building was designed by architect Frazer Crane (presumably with help from his brother Niles), who created a sleek, angular, modernist home that was covered roof-to-floor, inside and out, in thousands of rectangular white tiles leading many unimpressed locals tobluntly dub it a 'giant gents' toilet'.

Championship: Struggling Giants Aston Villa Appoint Steve Bruce As New Manager

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Championship strugglers Aston Villa have named ex-Birmingham City player and coach Steve Bruce as their new manager just over a week after Roberto Di Matteo was given the elbow at Villa Park.

The 55-year-old Bruce left Hull City in the summer after taking them back to the Premier League. Indeed, the former Manchester United defender has returned four sides to the top-flight in his managerial career, more than anyone else.

Nothing To Sniff At: Adrian Mutu Appointed As New General Manager Of Dinamo Bucharest

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Photo via @Emishor/Twitter

With his playing career having petered out fairly spectacularly, Adrian Mutu is now set to try his hand inthe cut-and-thrust world of general management.

As confirmed by Pies' unofficial Romanian football correspondent Emanuel Rosu (@Emishor), Mutu has been officially sworn in as the new general manager of Dinamo Bucharest.

Modern Football Is Rubbish: South African Players ‘Dab’ In The Middle Of A Match (Video)

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Just when you think football has reached it's vacuous nadir with the Wembley 'dab cam', you witness two players actually going out of their way to toss out a couple of 'dabs' mid-match not as goal celebrations, but during actual, proper open play.

Presumably passing for "skill" on the South African domestic scene, Free State Stars duo Langelihle Ndlovu and Pule Mmodi both performed the Paul Pogba-approved dance step in the latter stages of their recent Diski Challenge game againstPlatinum Stars.

World Cup Qualifying: Pablo Escobar Scores Couple Of Stonkers In Bolivia’s 2-2 Draw With Ecuador (Videos)

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Taking time out from his hectic schedule as an international drug baron, Pablo Escobar helped himself to a couple of superb goals as Bolivia and Ecuador hammered out a 2-2 draw in their World Cup qualifier on Tuesday evening.

Bolivia went in 2-0 up at half-time thanks to Escobar's early brace the first of which came just three minutes in when the midfielder absolutely walloped one into the top corner from all of 25 yards.

Arsenal: Petr Cech Enters 2017 Guinness Book Of Records Not Once, But Twice (Photo)

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Testament to his longevity and consistency, Petr Cech has found himself entered into the 2017 edition of the Guinness Book of Records not once, but twice.

The Arsenal goalkeeper has been officially confirmed as holding two Premier League records: the most number of clean sheets (181) and the most number of Golden Glove awardsat different clubs.

Adidas Knock Out New Limited Edition Lionel Messi Boots That Are Only Available In His Size (Photos)

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Photo: Adidas Football

Adidas have seen fit to "honour" Lionel Messi by furnishing him with yet another pair of custom football boots.

Specifically knocked out for the US market, the gruesomely green, hideously holographic 'Messi 16+ PureAgility 10/10' boots went on sale a couple of days ago.

Ex-Liverpool Director Of Football Damien Comolli Claims He Was Sacked For ‘Wasting Money’ On Jordan Henderson

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Ex-Liverpool director of football Damien Comolli has claimed that recommending the purchaseof Jordan Henderson led directly to his dismissal at Anfield.

The club's owners, Fenway Sports Group (FSG), were reportedly unhappy with the return on their £16million investment in Henderson that theypromptly sacked Comolli for "wasting money" on the former Sunderland manback in 2012.

World Cup: Fahad Al-Muwallad Nets Wonder-Volley For Saudi Arabia v UAE (Video)

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Saudi Arabia went top of the Asian World Cup qualifying Group D on Tuesday, leapfrogging Australia after a 3-0 home win against United Arab Emirates. The game atJeddah's King Abdullah Sports Citywas lit up byFahad Al-Muwallad's stunning volley, which is surely a contender for goal of the season.

World Cup: Joe Hart Shines For England In Flaccid Draw With Slovenia (Video)

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With Wayne Rooney banished to the bench, Gareth Southgate's England played out a disappointing goallessaway to Slovenia on Tuesday night, with Joe Hart's heroics saving the Three Lions from an even worse result.

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Hart, on loan with Torino after being usurped by Pep Guardiola fave Claudio Bravo at Manchester City, had to be at his very best to keep out the hosts.

France Pip Netherlands As Paul Pogba Scores From Outside The Box For First Time In 60 Attempts (Video)

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France pipped the Netherlands by a goal to nil in Amsterdam on Monday evening to keep themselves perched at the top of their 2018 World Cup qualifying group on goal difference.

The decisive goal was scored by Paul Pogba on the half-hour mark, with the £89million man rasping one in from distance his first goal for France from outside the box in his last 60 attempts.

Classic Commentary Clanger: Peter Drury Prematurely Roars THE NETHERLANDS Into 2014 World Cup Final (Video)

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With his premeditated prose and propensity for meretriciousverbiage, Peter Drury is a commentator who tends to split opinion.

Some regard him as a footballing poet of sorts. Others think he's just a bit of a simpering gas bag.

Drury: Poet or gas bag?

Regardless, Drury is responsible for one of Pies' favourite commentary clangers of recent years, specifically the wonderful ricket he dropped while chuntering away over the 2014 World Cup semi-final between Argentina and the Netherlands.

Norwegian Television Pundits Plunged Into Despair As San Marino Score First Away Goal In 15 Years (Video)

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Before tonight, you'd have to skipback to 2001 for the last time perennial midgets San Marino managed to score a goal on their travels.

However, their long, long wait for an away strike came to an end against Norway whenMattia Stefanelli cracked home an equaliser in the 54th minute...

Indeed, the sight of their boys being pegged back by the side that have scored just three goals total since 2008 was too much to bear for these Norwegian television pundits to bear.

‘I Think We’re Just Bad At It’ – Gareth Bale Breaks Silence On Wales’ Increasingly Lopsided Team Photos

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It's only really come to the fore of late but you may have noticed that something strange is going on regarding Wales' pre-match team photos.

Indeed, it all became starkly apparent when the Welsh starting XI for Saturday's World Cup qualifier against Georgia lined up with just three men in the back row and eight men squatting in front.

Spain: Gerard Pique Vows To Quit International Football After Ridiculous Shirt Sleeve Squabble

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Gerard Pique has vowed to retire from international duty with Spain after the 2018 World Cup as the result of yet another mini-controversy brought about by his staunch pro-Catalan independence views.

Pique was booed and heckled throughout Spain's World Cup qualifier against Albania on Sunday after it was noticed that, unlike his teammates, his shirt did not bearany red and yellow trim (the national colours of Spain) on the cuffs.

Russian FA Pull Plug On Half-Time Commemoration Of Vasily Beresutki’s 100th Cap After Untimely Own-Goal

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Sunday was a special onefor Vasily Berezutski as the veteran Russian defender brought up a century of appearancesfor his country in a friendly against Costa Rica.

Unfortunately, Berezutski wasn't able to mark the occasion with a victoryas Costa Rica went on to win4-3 in Krasnodar.In fact, the 34-year-old centre-back's big day transpired to be something of a farce.

Jackie McNamara Sacked As York City Manager, Immediately Takes Over As Caretaker Boss… Of York City

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Given that they've been abject for ages it's only a surprise that it's taken this long, but today Jackie McNamara has been sacked as manager of York City.

With a win ratio of around 18% over his tenure, McNamara has piloted York to 19th place in the National League after their relegation from the Football League last season.

Retro Football: Here’s The £35-Per-Week Contract Manchester United Offered Goalkeeper Pat Dunne In 1965 (Photo)

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Pat Dunne in action for Manchester United (Photo: Popperfoto/Getty Images)

An image has surfaced on Reddit of what is purported to be the very contract that Manchester United offered to goalkeeper Pat Dunne in 1965.

Having joined from Shamrock Rovers the previous year, United decided to reward Dunne for playing his part in their 1964/65 title win by lavishing him with a bumper new contract.

Record Breaker: Belgium’s Christian Benteke Scores Fastest Goal In World Cup Qualifying History v Gibraltar (Video)

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Crystal Palace Striker Christian Benteke netted a hat-trick in Belgium's 6-0 mauling of Gibraltar in the World Cup qualifiers on Monday evening. However, it was the ex-Liverpool star's first goal which made history, coming in at an incredible seven seconds from kick-off.

From the kick-off, Benteke pounced on a wayward pass from the Gibraltar side before racing into the box and firing home, all within a quickfire seven seconds.

PSG’s Serge Aurier In Hot Water After Celebrating Ivory Coast Goal With Bizarre Throat-Slitting Gesture (Video)

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No stranger to controversy, PSG full-back Serge Aurier was at it again during Ivory Coast's 3-1 World Cup qualifying win against Mali. After seeing his cross converted via an own-goal fromSalif Coulibaly, the 23-year-old defender ran towards his own fans before making a throat-slitting gesture.

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Aurier found himself in big trouble with PSG last season after publicly criticising his then manager Laurent Blanc during a live Periscope chat, with the former Toulouse player copping a suspension from the Ligue 1 giants.

World Cup: Wes Hoolahan Provides Sublime Assist, Inspires Irish Republic To Precious Win In Moldova (Video)

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The Republic of Ireland registered a 3-1 win away to Moldova on Sunday night, a precious victory inspired by Norwich City playmaker Wes Hoolahan.

On a night that saw Wales only draw at home to Georgia and Austria lose in Belgrade, Ireland's victory puts them level on points with Group D leaders Serbia.

Tranmere Fan Welcomes New Manager Mickey Mellon By Wearing Suitably Fabulous Melon Helmet (Video)

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Photo: @tranmererovers/Twitter

Despite only being in the job for a day, Micky Mellon began his Tranmere tenure with a 2-0 win over Wrexham in the National League on Saturday afternoon.

Indeed, Mellonwas given a warm welcome atPrenton Park, with one fan going out of his way to make the Scot feel at home by creating a stylish homage to the new boss.

Football Tat: Petr Cech Is Flogging Knitted Replica Versions Of His Trademark Protective Helmet (Video)

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With winter around the corner and a distinct nip in the air, Petr Cech has decided to capitalise by plugging his very own brand of replica protective head-guards.

Yes, you too could look *that* stylish while prowling the muddy, cacked-up goalmouth for your local Sunday League side.

The Arsenal goalkeeper, who has repeatedly stated that he doesn't enjoy wearing his helmet and only does so on doctor's orders, is hoping to flog you a signed replica knitted version through his own personal e-store.

‘How Is That Supposed To Help Him?’ – Gareth Southgate Criticises England Fans For Booing Wayne Rooney After Malta Shambles

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Gareth Southgate has criticised the fans who booed Wayne Rooney throughout his masterful, controlling performance in England's strong and uncompromising 2-0 win over mighty Malta (beaten 5-1 by Scotland in their last outing) on Saturday evening.

Given all the time and space in the world by hisMaltese opponents, the best Rooney could manage from his infuriating 'quarterback' non-role was a liberal arrayof misplaced passes and a couple of tameshots on goal.

History: Serie B Referee Shows First-Ever Green Card For Good Sportsmanship (Video)

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History was made earlier this weekduring the Serie B clash between Virtus Entella and Vicenza, with the awarding of the first green card ever in football.

The Italian second-tier launched the new initiative in January, in an attempt to improve the image of the game by awarding the card for instances of fair play by players.

World Cup: Tottenham’s Vincent Janssen Nets Solo Cracker For Netherlands v Belarus (Video)

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Vincent Janssen has yet to really blossom with Tottenham this season, with just one EFL CUp goal to his name so far. However, during the Netherlands' 4-1 World Cup qualifier win over Belarus this weekend, the striker showcased his talents courtesy of a superb solo strike.

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Neatly skipping past a defender neat the centre circle, the former AZ Alkmaar man raced towards the Belarus goal before unleashing a cracking strike whichmade it 4-1 to Danny Blind's side.

FAIL: FA Introduce Embarrassing Wembley ‘Dab-Cam’ For England v Malta Game

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Taking their inspiration from those appalling 'kiss-cams' which plague US sporting arenas, Wembley staff introduced the cringe-inducing 'dab-cam' during England's World Cup qualifier with Malta on Saturday.

The 'dab' originated in the Atlanta hip-hop scene around five years ago but with the likes of Paul Pogba and Jesse Lingard have turned it into a famous goal celebration over this side of the Atlantic.

World Cup: Gareth Southgate Gets Off To Winning Start As England Cruise Past Maltese Minnows At Wembely (Photos & Highlights)

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Gareth Southgate got his reign as England caretaker boss off to an easy win against Malta at Wembley on Saturday evening.

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Not surprisingly, the visitors offered little in the way of an attacking threat, leaving England with the chance to rack up a hefty score. However, the Three Lions could only manager two goals, with the likes of Dele Alli, Theo Walcott, Wayne Rooney and Jesse Lingard allthwarted by Maltese 'keeperAndrew Hogg.

Liverpool Send Jurgen Klopp Down To His Local Club For Nice Relaxing Game Of Crown Green Bowls (Video)

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To celebrate his first year in charge, Liverpool sent manager Jurgen Klopp down to the Holy Trinity Bowling Club in Formby to participate in a nice, gentile game of crown green bowls.

Klopp admitted to having been bamboozled by bowls after seeing it being played on a school exchange trip to Luton of all places, asking himself'what the f**k' (his words) was going on.

Slapstick: Enner Valencia Evades Police On Golf Cart Over Unpaid Child Maintenance Charge During Ecuador Match (Video)

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In a scene straight out of Benny Hill, Ecuador attacher Enner Valencia was literally chased out of the Atahualpa stadium in Quito on a stretcher during Ecuador's clash with Chile.

The West Ham striker, currently on loan at Everton, had been metby police and lawyers following a training session on Wednesday over claims that he owes the mother of his five-year-old daughter £13,350 in child maintenance payments.

War Wound: Neymar Bruised And Bloodied After Being Caught By Flailing Elbow In Brazil’s 5-0 Tonking Of Bolivia (Photos & Video)

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Neymar may have officially moved past Zico and into fourth place onBrazil's all-time top scorer listwith his goal against Boliviabutthe nippy striker didn't haveit all his own way on the night.

Indeed, an attempted piece of trickery out on the flank left Neymarcovered in his own claret after a stray elbow from Bolivian winger Yasmani Duk opened up the Barcelona man'seyebrow.

Portugal: Cristiano Ronaldo Tries, And Fails, To Teach Pepe A Little Bit Of Freestyle Skill (Video)

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Cristiano Ronaldo has been busy limbering up ahead of his first outing for Portugalsince his Euro 2016 final ended in tear-strewn, moth-faced agony.

With aWorld Cup qualification double-header against Andorra and the Faroe Islands on the cards, Portugal trained on the outskirts of Lisbon with Ronaldo once again the centre of attention.

Arrivederci: Graziano Pelle Sent Home By Italy After Refusing To Shake Coach Giampiero Ventura’s Hand

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It's been confirmed that Graziano Pelle has been shunted out of the Italy squad for his refusal to shake coach Giampiero Ventura's hand.

Pelle was withdrawn on the hour mark during Italy's drudgerous 1-1 World Cup qualifier against Spain last night, but snubbed Ventura as he sulked his way back to the bench.

Howard Gayle: Liverpool’s First Black Player Calls For MBE Honour Change After Refusing To Accept His

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Liverpool's first black player, Howard Gayle, has revealed that he refused to accept an MBE due to the residual and unsavoury implications of 'empire' inherent with the award.

For the uninitiated, the MBE or 'Member of the Order of the British Empire' is achivalroushonour doledout by the monarchy to citizens who are deemed to have made notable contributions to the realm, like Jeremy Beadle andAdele.

Competition: WIN! Art Of Football £25 Gift Voucher To Spend As You See Fit!

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Pies are once again buddying up with our palsover at Art of Football to celebrate the launch of their swanky new-look website with a timely giveaway.

One lucky winner has the chance to win a £25 Art of Football gift voucher to spend however they chose be it on a cracking t-shirt or a beautiful little art print from the vast array of goodies on offer in their store.

World Cup: Seamus Coleman Nets WInning Goal For Ireland v Georgia Straight Out Of FIFA 17 (Video)

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The Republic of Ireland produced a lacklustre performance at home to Georgia on Thursday night in Dublin. However, captain Seamus Coleman came to the rescue in the second-half, scoring the only goal of the game courtesy of a bizarre touchline run with more than a hint of FIFA 17 about it.

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Picking up the ball on the right flank, the Everton full-back just keeps on running like a footballing Forrest Gump.

World Cup: Stoke Schemer Joe Allen Nets Stunner For Wales v Austria (Video)

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After scoring in his last two appearances for Stoke City, ex-Liverpool midfielder Joe Allen has done it again, powering home a superb effort during Wales' World Cup qualifier away to Austria.

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On 22 minutes, a Gareth Bale centre eventually found its way to Chris Gunter in the Austrian box, and when the Reading defender nodded the ball back, Allen was there to power home a tremendous left-footed effort.

On This Day In 2001: David Beckham Rescues England With Last-Ditch Freekick Against Greece (Video)

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Remember when, with immediate effect, David Beckham erased the memory of 92 shoddy minutes of tripe by sticking his 93rd-minute freekick past the Greece goalkeeper to sendEngland to the World Cup?

Yeah? Recall it? Well that was 15 years ago, buddy. Fifteen. Bloody. Years. Celtic now have players on their books who weren't even born at the moment Beckham's curler rustled into the net at Old Trafford.

England: Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain Admits Being Left Hanging By Sam Allardyce Was A ‘Kick Up The Backside’

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Alex-Oxlade Chamberlain has admitted that being dropped from the England squad has providedhim with a much needed "kick up the backside".

The Arsenal midfielder was last included in an England squad for the Euro 2016 qualifier against Lithuania back in October of 2015, and therefore went on to miss out on the actual tournament the following summer (largely due to injury) as well as Sam Allardyce's one and only game in charge.

Spain: Ander Herrera Assumed ‘Emergency Call-Up’ Was Hoax Concocted By Arch Mischief-Maker David De Gea

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Ander Herrera has admitted that he initially assumed his "emergency call-up" into the Spain squad was merely another classic hoax from the arch mischief-maker himself, David De Gea.

Having never made a senior appearance for the Spanish national side, Herrera whisked his family away to spend international week on holiday in Madrid.

Reports: Mesut Ozil And Alexis Sanchez Both Plan To Ask Arsenal For New £250,000-A-Week Contracts

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It looks like Arsenal might be girding themselves for an expensive month or two with rumours today that two of their biggest stars are seeking gigantic pay increases.

Already the top two earners at the Emirates, word is thatMesut Ozil and Alexis Sanchez could end up costing the club around £36million more than they'd originally budgeted for when initial contract extension talks began last year.

Football Tat: Benfica To Launch Their Own Collection Of Luxury Wedding Dresses (Photo)

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Photo: Lisbon Lux Brands (via @PortuBall/Twitter)

In an altogether different class to the usual football tat we feature here on Pies (FC Dnipro bucket and spade, anyone?), Benfica are on the cusp of launching their very own range of luxury wedding dresses.

The Portuguese giants have collaborated with bridal stylist Michelle Oliveira to create a range of 40 dresses specifically 24 bridal gowns, 12 gala dresses and four children's designs, all decked out in club colours.

Andrey Arshavin Gleefully Relieves Kazakh Journalist Of His Hair After Winning Goal-Scoring Wager (Photo & Video)

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Despite falling off the radar somewhat of late, we're pleased to inform you that Andrey Arshavin is still plugging away over in the Kazakhstan Premier League with FC Kairat Almaty.

In fact, the 35-year-old Russian forward has enjoyed a fairly decent debut season with Kairat, contributing eight goals in 25 appearances over the course.

‘Nice, Manchester City And… That’s It’ – Ex- Liverpool Striker Mario Balotelli Names The Two Clubs Where He’s Felt Happy

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Currently re-born with Nice in Ligue 1, Mario Balotelli has missed out on a place in Italy's squad for their upcoming World Cup qualifiers, despite being tipped by many for a recall.

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However, the ex-Liverpool man is still satiisfiedwith his renaissance on the Côte d'Azur, naming Nice as one of just two clubs were he has felt happy.

Scotland: Joey Barton Charged With Breaking Gambling Rules By Betting On 44 Football Matches

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Joey Barton has been charged with breaking gambling rules by the Scottish FA, with the Rangers' star accused of placing a whopping 44 bets on matches between July 1st and September 15th.

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The 34-year-old moved to the Scottish Premiership this summer and was expected by many to thrive at Ibrox.

EFL Trophy: Bradford Subbed Their Goalkeeper Off After Three Minutes In Attempt To Bend Tournament Rules

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With the Checkatrade EFL Trophy proving grossly unpopular with almost everybody since the competition's grand overhaul, Bradford City further undermined the integrity of the whole thing in the opening minutes of their 2-1 win over Bury on Tuesday night.

With the game just three minutes old, Bradford took off their first-choice goalkeeper Colin Doyle (who you may recall cost the princely sum of £1 when he joined from Blackpool in July) and replaced him with second-stringunderstudy Rouven Sattelmaier for the final 87 minutes.

Classic Moments: An Irate Neil Warnock Tears Into Sheffield United Defenders Chris Morgan And Phil Jagielka, 2004 (Video)

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To mark his re-entry into the management pool at Cardiff City, we thought we'd delve into Neil Warnock's back catalogue.

Specifically, we're talking about the time he well and truly tore a strip off Chris Morgan and Phil Jagielka after a Championship game against Wolves in November of 2004.

Sparta Prague Players To Train With Ladies’ Team After Making Sexist Remarks To Female Match Official

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Photo: DR.com

Two Sparta Prague players are being made to train with the club's ladies' team after making sexist comments about a female match official.

Sparta goalkeeper Tomas Koubek took to social media to declare that "women belong at the stove" after Sunday's 3-3 draw with Brno after lineswomanLucie Ratajova missed an offside call in the build up to the away side's stoppage-time equaliser.

England: Dele Alli Quietly Devastates Oblivious Eric Dier With The Stealthiest Of Secret Nutmegs (Video)

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As you're probably aware, Dele Alli and Eric Dier are the very bestest of chums and, as such, have dedicated their entire existences to making each other's lives a waking nightmare.

The latest instalment of the Tottenham pair'sendearing little tit-for-tat battle has seen Alli take the spoils, with Dier left completely oblivious.

Hard Arse: Mario Gomez Forced To Pull Out Of Germany Squad With Curious Buttock Injury

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Unfortunately, Germany will have to do without Mario Gomez for their upcoming World Cup qualifying double-header against Czech Republic and Northern Ireland after the striker pulled out of the squad due to injury.

The news was broken by Gomez's current employers Wolfsburg, who issued a statement to confirm that the 31-year-old would be unavailable for national service due to a rather curious (and painful) sounding problem with his derriere.

West Ham Vice-Chairwoman Karren Brady Claims Club Had ‘No Culture’ When She Arrived

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With the club in upheaval after their move to the infinitely soullessOlympic Stadium over the off-season, vice-chairwoman Karren Brady has stepped in and sought to placate anyfans left disenfranchised by the transition.

Speaking at the Leaders 16 awards (handed out to those excellingin the world of sport-related business), Brady began by assuring the Hammers' fanbase that the move to the Olympic Stadium was a terrific chance to "rebrand" the club.

Random: Aston Villa and Virgin Trains Get Into Lighthearted Twitter Spat Over Villans’ Current Travails

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Poor old Aston Villa have endured a terrible start to the Championship season after being relegated from the top-flight earlier this year. Despite spending a huge amount of money on players this summer, the Villans find themselves 19th in the division, with a second successive relegation a definite possibility.

Prodigious: 13-Year-Old Wunderkind Karamoko Dembele Makes Debut For Celtic Under-20 Team (Photo)

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Photo via Celtic Bible

As if you weren't sat there feeling decrepitenough already, last night a fetus born in the year of our lord 2003 went and made his debut for Celtic's Under-20 team.

At the tender age of just 13, Karamoko Dembele came on for the final ten minutes of the Bhoys' 3-1 victory over Hearts at Cappielow.

England: Burnley Defender Michael Keane Receives Belated Call-Up As FA Rectify Glen Johnson Anomaly

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Congratulations are definitely due to Michael Keane, who has belatedly played his way into the England squad for the upcoming World Cup qualifiers against Malta and Slovenia.

The Burnley centre-half, 23, received his first senior call-up after the FA noticed the technical database glitch that saw them accidentally name Glen Johnson in a 2016 squad.

Middlesbrough Midfielder Marten De Roon Gets Taxi With Fans After Missing Last Train Home From West Ham Game (Photo)

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Photo: David Rodgers/Getty Images

Middlesbrough midfielder Marten de Roon was forced to find his own way home after Saturday's 1-1 draw with West Ham after his post-match drug test saw him miss the last train back from London.

As such, the Dutchman was left stranded at the Olympic Stadium until a group of generous Boro fans came riding to his rescue.

Reports: Rigobert Song Is Now ‘Out Of Coma And Breathing Unassisted’ After Suffering Cardiac Arrest

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Positive news is emanating from Cameroon that Rigobert Song is steadily recovering from the suspected stroke that saw him hospitalised and "fighting for his life" in Yaounde yesterday.

It's since been reported that Song actually suffered a cardiac arrest and was placed into a coma.

Thankfully, it looks like the ex-Liverpool and West Ham defender is over the worst of it, with African football journalist Gary Al-Smith issuing an update to assure fans that the 40-year-old has now begunto breathe unassisted again.

Pep Guardiola Has Cut Off The Internet At Man City’s Training Ground To Force Players To Talk To Each Other

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With today's professional footballers largelyexisting in a headphone-swathed, notification-checking bubble, it's refreshing to hear that Pep Guardiola has launched a one-man revolutionary crusade against self-inflicted isolationism at Man City.

In order to create a communal atmosphere at the training complex, Guardiola has decreed that all City players eat their meals together.

Official: Roberto Di Matteo Sacked By Aston Villa After Disastrous Start To Life In The Championship

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After just 124 days at the helm, Roberto Di Matteo has been sacked as Aston Villa manager this morning.

It would appear that Saturday's 2-0 away defeat against Preston was the final straw, with Di Matteo departing with just one Championship win to his name in his 11 games in charge.

MANAGERIAL NEWS: @AVFCOfficial part company with Roberto Di Matteo >> https://t.

Carlo Ancelotti Joins The Leather-Clad Fun As Bayern Munich Celebrate Oktoberfest (Photos)

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Sunday saw the entire Bayern Munich entourage talc up and slither into their finest leather shorts for the club's annual Oktoberfest celebration.

As per usual, the Bayern masses dressed up to the nines and descended on the beer tent at the Theresienwiese in Munich, with Carlo Ancelotti cutting a handsome dash at his first ever Oktoberfest as coach.

Man Utd: Disabled Fan Was ‘Made Up’ After Juan Mata Delayed Team Bus To Chat With Him (Video)

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A disabled Manchester United fan was "made up" after Juan Mata delayed the team bus to spend a few minutes chatting with him outside Old Trafford.

Phone footage of Mata jogging over to hug and pose for photos with nine-year-old Alex Nield circulated on social media over the weekend.

Alex's father Jon, also revealed that the United forward had also arranged a complimentary match ticket for the youngster into the bargain.

Ex-Liverpool Defender Rigobert Song Is Unconscious And ‘Fighting For Life’ After Suffering Stroke

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It's being reported that former Liverpool and West Ham defender Rigobert Song is in critical condition in hospital after suffering a stroke.

According to the Guardian, Song is "fighting for his life" after being rushed to hospital in Yoaunde, the Cameroonian capital.

Ex-Cameroonian international Rigobert Song is unconscious and receiving hospital treatment, family member tells BBC https://t.

‘We’re Being Forced To Train By The Side Of The Road’ – West Ham Accused Of Flouting FA Sexism Rules By Their Own Ladies Team

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West Ham have been accused of flouting the FA's rules on gender discrimination... by the chairman of West Ham ladies' team.

Indeed, team chairman Stephen Hunt has lodged a formal complaint with the FA afterwrangling with the club for months over funding and facilities to no avail.

Speaking to BBC Sport, Hunt argued that the Hammers deserve to be fined for not "acting like a 21st century club" before going on to catalogue the farcical conditionsthat the ladies' side are currently operating under.

Official: Swansea Sack Francesco Guidolin (On His Birthday) And Immediately Replace Him With Ex-USA Coach Bob Bradley

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Without a win in the Premier League since the opening day of the season, Swansea have parted company with head coach Francesco Guidolin and on his 61st birthday too. Ice cold.

With pressure already mounting before the weekend's 2-1 home defeat against Liverpool, Guidolin has today been dismissed and immediately replaced by former USA coach Bob Bradley, who leaves Ligue 2 side Le Havre to take up his new position with the Swans.

Football Tat: Behold, The Handsome Liverpool FC ‘Anfield’ Cuckoo Clock You Never Knew You Needed

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Liverpool fans, are you continually frustrated by not being able to pair your devilishly stylish matching Anfield-themed bomber jacket and shirt set with a cuckoo clock befitting your sartorialmajesty?

Well, suffer no longer. The good people at The Bradford Exchangeare here to put you out of your misery with the timepiece of your dreams.

England: Gareth Southgate Recalls Glen Johnson For Upcoming World Cup Qualifiers, Jesse Lingard And Marcus Rashford Also Named

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England interim boss Gareth Southgate has named his first squad ahead of the upcoming World Cup qualifiers against Malta and Slovenia, with Stoke full-back Glen Johnson the biggest retro-surprise in the list.

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32-year-old Johnson has amassed 54 caps at international level but last played for England at the 2014 World Cup.

Ligue 1: Mario Balotelli Scores Superb Late Winner For Nice, Gets Sent Off Six Minutes Later (Video)

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He may have long since left the Premier League, but Mario Balotelli shall remain forever in our hearts. The ex-Liverpool flop was once again amongst the goals for Nice on Sunday, nettinga late winner against Lorient before, in classic Balotelli fashion, seeing red just six minutes later.

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Balotelli's goal, his sixth in five games for Nice, came on 86 minutes, with the Italian producing a sublime curling finish.

Arsenal: Shkodran Mustafi Gets Intimate With Ref As Gunners Leave It Late Against Burnley (Video)

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Arsenal needed a late and rather dodgy goal to finally break down Burnley at Turf Moor on Sunday, with captain Laurent Koscielny nudging the ball over the line with his elbow from an offside position.

The game also saw summer-signingShkodran Mustafi once again produce a fine, muscular display at the back as well as getting rather intimate with referee Craig Pawson.

Vannes Goalkeeper Makes Incredible Triple Save During Bizarre Botched Penalty In French Fifth Tier (Video)

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The French fifth tier clash between Vannes OC and TA Rennes produced a truly incredible penalty incidenton Saturday, with Vannes 'keeper JeffBedenik producing an incredible triple-save.

The spot-kick first hit the post before bouncing off Bedenik's back, right back into the path of the penalty-taker.

‘The Scumbags Left Me With The Bill’ – Harry Redknapp Describes Worst Part Of Being Named In Telegraph Corruption Sting

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Image: Telegraph Sport

Coming as a surprise to quite literally nobody, Harry Redknapp has found himself caught up in the Telegraph's undercover 'bung sting' that wound up costing Sam Allardyce the England job last week.

It was all a little underwhelming but Redknapp's name bubbled to the surface when the Telegraph released footage of the ex-Portsmouth managerrevealingthat some of his players had gambled on the results of one of their matches.

Galatasaray ‘Keeper Fernando Muslera Destroys Samuel Eto’o With Daring Half-Way Line Body Swerve (Video)

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Lukas Podolski weighed in with a couple of goals as Galatasaray comfortably saw offAntalyaspor in the Turkish Super Lig on Sunday afternoon.

However, it was a piece of maverick trickery from Gala goalkeeper Fernando Muslera that proved to be the highlight of the game.

Rampaging up the pitch to sweep up a long ball over the top, Muslera burstaway from one striker before swiftly reducinga secondto a quivering puddle with a daring body-swerve.

FAIL: Jeff Stelling And Paul Merson Want Harry Arter Called Up For England, Despite Playing Twice For Republic Of Ireland (Video)

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Players from the Republic of Ireland are all too often erroneously grouped with British players by the footballing media. However, Sky's Jeff Stelling and Paul Merson took it all to a new level ahead of this weekend's Premier League action.

Discussing the English national teamon a Facebook Live event, Stelling and Merson pondered Harry Arter's possible inclusion in interim boss Gareth Southgate's first squad, despite the fact that the Bournemouth midfielder already has two caps under his belt for the Republic of Ireland.

Goalkeeper Makes Incredible Double-Save After Bizarre Penalty In French Fifth Tier (Video)

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The French fifth tier clash between Vannes OC and TA Rennes produced a truly incredible penalty incidenton Saturday, with Vannes 'keeper JeffBedenik producing an incredible double-save.

The spot-kick first hit the post before bouncing off Bedenik's back, right back into thr path of the penalty-taker.

France: Jeremy Mathieu Called Up For World Cup Qualifiers, Immediately Retires From International Duty

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You may be surprised to learn that Barcelona veteranJeremy Mathieu has only ever amassed five caps for France since making his international debut in 2011.

Indeed, despite his credentials as a perfectly reliable utilitariandefender, the 32-year-old has been largely overlooked by Les Bleus.

West Ham: Dimitri Payet Sews Up Goal Of The Season Already With Wonderful Solo Effort v Middlesbrough (Video)

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Dimitri Payet registered a very strong contender for Goal of the Season against Middlesbroughon Saturday, with the West Ham playmaker scoring an incredible solo effort.

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Cristhian Stuani has given 'Boro the lead at the London Stadium early in the second-half before Payet netted his first goal of the seasonm courtesy of an incredible dazzling, dribbling goal.