Who Ate All the Pies Archives for January 2015

Antiques Roadshow’s ‘Most Valuable Item Ever’ Thought To Be FA Cup Replica Worth Over £1m

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The FA Cup trophy on display, circa 1965

The antiquities world is currently abuzz after it was reportedearlier this week that the Antiques Roadshow had just discoveredthe most expensive item in the long-runningBBC programme's 38-year history.

In a bid to stir up interest, the Antiques Roadshow producers refused to reveal any further details beyond confirming that the itemwas"a world famous piece owned by a sporting institution" and that it was discovered during filming at Harrogate's Royal Hall in North Yorkshire.

Leicester Boss Claudio Ranieri Takes His Players Out For Well-Earned Clean Sheet Pizza Party! (Photos)

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A theme is rapidly emerging as far as Leicester City's impressive 2015/16 campaign is concerned, and that theme is largely based around pizza.

Having promised to take his players out for a slice or three if they kept a clean sheet, Foxes boss Claudio Ranieri was finally able to uphold his end of the bargain this week after last weekend's 1-0 win over Crystal Palace.

On This Day In 1974: Don Revie Takes Charge Of England For The First Time

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England manager Don Revie poses for photographers with captain Emlyn Hughes, at a training session for the national team at Wembley, 1974

Don Revie had established himself as one of the most successful managers in football with Leeds United, and now he was given charge of England's national side.

Wicked Game: Viktoria Koln Concede Cruel Goal While Trying To Do The Referee A Favour (Video)

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You try and do a guy a favour...

Fourth-tier semi-pro outfit FC Viktoria Koln got themselves well and truly steamrollered in the German Cup on Wednesday night, eventually going down 6-0 at home to Bundesliga side Bayer Leverkusen.

However, while Viktoria struggled to match Leverkusen's fitness, craft and stamina levels, they were also forced to contend with the fickle gods of footballingfate too.

Arsenal: Guest Carves Impressive Thierry Henry Pumpkin For Halloween Wedding (Photo)

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Having been invited to a Halloween-themed wedding and instructed to bring a Jack o' Lantern as a gift, one chap decided to carve the Arsenal-supporting bride and groom a present they'd really love.

Indeed, after several hours of toil and trouble, Gerald Clarke was ready to show off his Thierry Henry-inspired creation on Twitter.

Trabzonspor Lock Ref In Changing Rooms For Four Hours After Controversial Late Penalty Decision

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Who'd be a referee, eh? Spare a thought for poor old Cagatay Sahan and his assistants, who were reportedly locked in their changing room for four hours after the ref failed to award Trabzonspor a late penalty in their 2-2 Turkish Super Lig draw with Gaziantepspor.

The order to temporarily imprison the officials was given by Trabzonspor presidentIbrahim Haciosmanoglu, who was fuming after Sahan had made a number of apparently question decisions in the game at theHüseyin Avni Aker Stadium 0n Wednesday, culminating in a late penalty shout for the home side being ignored by the man in the middle.

Reports: Adama Traore, 19, Set To Become Aston Villa’s Highest Earner Due To Ludicrous Contract Stipulation

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Despite having only made one start in hisfive appearances for Aston Villa so far, there are whispers on the wind that Adama Traore is soon to be bumped right up to the top of the club's top-earners list due to a frankly ridiculous stipulation inserted into the 19-year-old winger's contract.

Traore arrived from Barcelona in a £7million, five-year deal over the summer and it would appear that Villa threw the proverbial kitchen sink at the youngsterto coax him into swapping Catalonia for Brum.

Rebels: FC United Of Manchester To Reimburse Fans After Backing Down In FA Cup Kick-Off Time Squabble

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FC United of Manchester have found themselves embroiled in a quibble with the FA after the powers that be demanded their upcoming showpiece FA Cup first round tie against Chesterfield be moved to suit the television schedule.

The club originally put up a spirited fight when the FA declared that kick-off would be moved from Saturday afternoon to 7:45pm on Monday 9th November so the gamecould be shown live on BT Sport.

Capital One Cup – The Best Bits: Man City 5-1 Crystal Palace (Photos)

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Premier League leaders Manchester City powered into the last eight of the Capital Cup One after demolishing Crystal Palace 5-1 at the Etihad on Wednesday night.

Manuel Pellegrini put out a strong side, with Kevin De Bruyne outstanding throughout and youngsterKelechi Iheanacho producing a fine display.

On This Day In 1997: Gianluigi Buffon Makes His Debut For Italy, Aged Just 19

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He's now the most capped goalkeeper in the history of Italian international football with 152 caps to his name, but on 29th October, 1997, fresh-faced 19-year-old Parma goalkeeper Gianluigi Buffon lined up for his country for the very first time.

Italy were playing away in snow-blitzed Moscowfor a 1998 World Cup qualifier play-off against Russia, a match they drew 1-1.

Arsene Wenger, John Terry And Harry Kane To Record Tube Announcements As Part Of London Poppy Day

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As part of the upcoming London Poppy Day proceedings, a raft of footballing personalities will be lending their dulcet tones for use across the capital's Tube and tram networks.

Arsene Wenger, John Terry and Harry Kanewill all be recording special Poppy Day announcements for the project,which will see the London transport network voiced by celebrities as part of The Royal British Legion's Poppy Appeal on 29th October.

Capital One Cup – The Best Bits: Man Utd 0-0 Middlesbrough (1-3 Pens) (Photos)

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Championship side Middlesbrough produced a Wednesday night shock in the Capital One Cup, dumping the mighty Manchester United out of the competition at Old Trafford after a penalty shoot-out.

Aitor Karanka's Boro' were well-organised throughout the game, as the hosts struggled to find an end product.

‘If We Win, I’ll Take Your Shirt’ – Chelsea Boss Jose Mourinho Loses Bet With Young West Ham Mascot

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With wins/half-way convincing performances hard to come by and FA fines stacking up, we think it's fair to say that things really aren't going Jose Mourinho's way at the moment.

Things started reallyboiling over during Chelsea's tetchy 2-1 defeat at West Ham last Saturday, with asmall boy apparently responsible for sowing the first seed of discontent in the Upton Park tunnel.

Capital One Cup – The Best Bits: Liverpool 1-0 Bournemouth (Photos)

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At the fourth time of asking, Jurgen Klopp enjoyed his first win as Liverpool boss as the Reds worked hard to beat Bournemouth 1-0 at Anfield.

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Eddie Howe's Premier League strugglers started well, withJunior Stanislas thwarted by Liverpool 'keeper Adam Bogdan from close-range.

Sepp Blatter Admits FIFA Planned To Award Russia The 2018 World Cup Before Vote Took Place

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Astonishing we know, but Sepp Blatter has let slip the revelation today that FIFA may be just the teeny, tiniest bit dodgy.

The organisation's suspended president has admitted that FIFA had an under-the-table agreement in place to award the 2018 World Cup to Russia before the vote had even taken place.

Tactical Tumescence: Independiente Players To Take Viagra Ahead Of Copa Sudamerica Clash To Combat Bogota Altitude

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Santa Fe's lofty El Campin stadium (Photo: Colprensa-Raúl Palacios)

It's fair to say that most visiting teams have a tough time of it when they arrive in Bogota to play Colombian outfit Santa Fe, what with the club's El Campin stadium being perched 2,600 metres above sea level and all.

However, in a bid to combat the head-spinning altitude ahead of their upcoming Copa Sudamericana clash against Santa Fe, Argentinian side Independiente are placing their faith in the tumescent power of the little blue pill.

Dutch Amateur Minnows Knock FC Dordrecht Out Of Cup With 50-Yard Lob In 112th Minute (Video)

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There were cockle-warming scenes in the KNVB Beker (the Dutch equivalent of the FA Cup) last night when amateur minnows VV Capelle sent second tier side FC Dordrecht sprawling out of the competition with a glorious extra-time winner.

VV managed to sneaka 1-0 away win in the 112th-minute of the game whenJordao Pattinama chanced his arm from 50-odd yards and managed to catch the Dordrecht 'keeper off guard.

On This Day In 1973: Johan Cruyff Finally Makes His Barcelona Debut After Two Months Of Bureaucratic Delays

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Cruyff signs on the dotted line at Barcelona, August 1973

Barcelona's fans finally got to see Johan Cruyff, the man widely pegged as the finest player in the world, on 28th October, 1973 three long months after the mercurial Dutchman had first signed for the Catalan side.

Indeed, Barca officially signed Cruyffon 13th August, but bureaucratic problems delayed his competitive debut for weeks, with the marquee signing forced to sit out the first seven games of the season.

Hoffenheim Appoint ‘Youngest Coach In Bundesliga History’ As 28-Year-Old Julian Nagelsmann Steps Into The Breach

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Photo: TSG 1899 Hoffenheim

TSG Hoffenheim have struck a deal that will seetheir current Under-19s coach Julian Nagelsmann become the youngest head coach in Bundesliga history as of next season.

With the club second bottom inthe table, Hoffenheimsacked coachMarkus Gisdol on Monday having managed just once in his opening 10 games, with ex-Stuttgart bossHuub Stevens immediately coming in on an interim contract until theend of the season.

Chelsea: Jose Mourinho Quips Diego Costa ‘Must Have Punched Himself’ As Scrappy Striker Taken To Hospital With Rib Injury

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"Tell it to me straight Doc, am I gonna make it?"

As you're no doubt aware, Chelsea slumped to another defeat after being dumped out of the League Cup by Stoke on penalties last night, despite Jose Mourinho maintaining that his side's performance was good enough to silence their "stupid" critics.

Just An Illusion: Venezuelan Player Celebrates Goal By Making The Ball ‘Levitate’ In Mid Air (Video)

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Photo via Metro

There were freaky scenes in the Venezuelan top flight on Sunday evening shortly afterZamora forward Cesar Martinez came off the bench to open the scoring against Caracas in the 70th minute.

Surrounded by his teammates, Martinez celebrated his goal by appearing to make the ball levitate in mid-air.

Capital One Cup – The Best Bits: Stoke 1-1 Chelsea (Stoke Win 5-4 On Pens) (Photos)

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Chelsea's horror start to the 2015/16 season rolls on, with the Blues dumped out of the Capital One Cup on penalties by Stoke on Tuesday night.

Jose Mourinho put out a very strong 11 against the Potters, with Baba Rahman in for Cesar Azpilicueta at left-back.The visitors dominated the first-period, with Stoke 'keeper Jack Butland forced into a number of fine saves, including a couple from Diego Costa.

Bayern Munich’s Douglas Costa Unleashes Piledriving Wonder-Strike Against Wolfsburg (Video)

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Brazilian winger Douglas Costa has shone for Bayern Munich since making the big-money move from Shakhtar Donetsk in the summer, with his quick feet and creativity adding even more star quality to Pep Guardiola's bejeweled side. And on Tuesday night the 25-year-old produced another moment of magic in his side's DFBCup fixture away at Wolfsburg.

Capital One Cup – The Best Bits: Sheffield Wednesday 3-0 Arsenal (Photos)

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Sheffield Wednesday added insult to Arsenal's injuries on Tuesday night, deservedly dumping the Premier League giants out of the Capital One Cup 3-0.

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Arsene Wenger put out a second-string side at Hillsborough, with teenager Glen Kamara staring in midfield.

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Sergio Ramos Officially Denies He’s Working Part-Time As A Supermarket Security Guard After Lookalike Photo Surfaces

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Sergio Ramos has moved to officially deny that he's been forced to moonlight as a supermarket security guard to make ends meet after a photo, purported to be the Real Madrid defender, did the social media rounds this morning.

'Ramos' was allegedly spotted keeping the peace while working as a security guard in the Mercadona supermarket in Tenerife.

Retro Football: 18-Year-Old Robin Van Persie Models Handsome Beige Knitwear, 2002 (Photos)

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Having broken into the first team at the age of 17 the previous season, Robin van Persie signed his first professional contract with Feyenoord over the summer of 2002.

To celebrate, the Eredivisie side chose to immortalise their prodigious (and infamously petulant) new teenage prince with a portrait session in November of 2002.

Peruvian Referee Accidentally Provides Back-Heel Assist For Winning Goal In 3-2 Thriller (Video)

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"Lo siento"

Sporting Cristal and Juan Aurich played out an exciting five-goal thriller in the Peruvian Primera Division on Sunday evening, with the home side coming from behind not once but twice to nab the points and go top of the table.

However, Sporting owe a debt of gratitude to referee Luis Garay Evia, who unwittingly laid on the winning goal for Irvin Avila with a cute little back-heeled assist after Juan Aurich goalkeeper Pedro Gallese royally buggered up an attempted quick clearance.

‘You Provided 80% Of My Happiness’ – Arsenal Fan Pays Special Thanks To Alexis Sanchez In PhD Thesis Acknowledgements (Photo)

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Having spent severalgruelling months writing a PhD thesis inaerospace engineering, specifically focusing onapplying Polynomial Chaos Theory to numerical problems in the aerospace field, one Arsenal fan felt the need to pay homage to Alexis Sanchez for helping him keep his sanity intact through the tough times.

The Telegraph Apologise To Adam Johnson For Claiming ‘Aeroplane’ Goal Celebration Was Reference To Malaysia Airlines Crash

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When Adam Johnson scored for Sunderland in the Tyne-Wear derby on Sunday afternoon, the winger made a point of sprinting the entire length of the pitch to celebrate in front of the Newcastle fans, who had been goading him throughout the game for reasons of which we're sure you're aware.

However, a few folks on Twitter took Johnson's arms-splayed celebration as a direct reference to the Malaysia Airlines planethat was shot down overUkraine last year, killing two Newcastle fans as well as all other 281 passengers and 15 crew members on board.

On This Day In 2012: Man City And Swansea Play Out The Longest Game In Premier League History

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It was a forgettable day for so many reasons, but one that will be remembered because it set a record. When the two Citys met at Eastlands on 27 October 2012, the 102 minutes the game lasted for meant it would be the longest game played in Premier League history.

The added time came because of lengthy stoppages following serious injuries to the blues' defender Micah Richards and Swans' goalkeeper Michael Vorm.

Oldham Fan Finds Hi-Vis Jacket, Poses As Match Steward During Goalless Draw Against Rochdale (Photos)

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With Saturday's League One clash between Rochdale and Oldham eventually finishing a dreary goalless draw, it would appear that the fans were forced to make their own entertainment.

To whit, Oldham fan Daniel Ball kept himself amused by stumbling across a hi-vis jacket and, after being egged on by his cronies, used it to pose as a match steward for several minutes before eventually being sounded out by the actual security staff on duty at Spotland.

Reports: Jose Mourinho’s People Make Contact With PSG And Inter Milan In Preparation For Life After Chelsea

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With the storm a-gathering high over his head, it's being mooted in today's papers that Jose Mourinho has begun preparing for life after Chelsea.

Chelsea suffered their fifth Premier League defeat of the season against West Ham on Saturday, a result that left them languishing way down in 15th place after 10 games.

Dynamo Kiev Executive Floats Idea Of ‘Segregated Stands For Black Fans’ In Wake Of Shameful Racist Scenes

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The executive director of Dynamo Kiev's OlympicStadium has gone on record as sayingthat segregated stands for black fans may be a "good idea" in the wake of Eastern European football's latest shameful dalliance with racist abuse.

The problem came to the fore once again last week when damning footage circulated of four black fans being attacked in the terraces during Kiev's 0-0 draw against Chelsea in the Champions League.

Rosenborg Celebrate Securing First League Title In Five Years With Deafening Bit Of Audience Participation (Video)

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Echoing scenes we first saw in their dressing room a couple of months ago, Rosenborg celebrated mathematically securingthe club's first Norwegian league title in five years with a rousing rendition of their favourite war cry.

Once again led by megaphone-wielding veteran defenderMikael Dorsin, the Rosenborg players included their fans for a little bit of celebratory audience participation, going from pin-drop silence to all out mayhem in a matter of seconds.

FAIL: Twente’s Hakim Ziyech Goes Arse Over Biscuit While Celebrating Goal Against PSV (Video)

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Image: Sky Sports

Slightly late on the uptake here but we just can't resist a good old fashioned goal celebration fail, this time lovingly laid on by FC Twente midfielder Hakim Ziyech shortly after scoring the equaliser against PSV on Saturday afternoon...


For the record, struggling Twente went on to lose 3-1 at home.

Dwight Yorke Optimistically Puts Himself Forward For Aston Villa Manager Job On The Basis He Used To Play For Them

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With Tim Sherwood shown the door following yesterday's lapse2-1 defeat against Swansea, the Aston Villa manager's gig is once again up for grabs.

Several names have already been mentioned in passing, with ex-Lyon coach Remi Garde currently favourite to land the job ahead of the likes ofDavid Moyes, Brendan Rodgers and Nigel Pearson.

Cristiano Ronaldo’s New Nike Boots Inspired By ‘Savage Beauty’ Of His Home Island Of Madeira (Photos)

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With Cristiano Ronaldo recently becoming the all-time leading scorer for both his club and his country, Nike have decided to pay homage to their main man with a series of new signature boots chronicling his life and times.

The seven-boot series begins, rather predictably, with Chapter 1 a new pair of Mercurial Superfly boots that are inspired by the "savage beauty" of Ronaldo's home town on the volcanic Portuguese island of Madeira.

Didier Drogba Makes Hell Of An Impact By Scoring Two Back-Heels In Two Minutes For Montreal (Video)

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Didier Drogba scored his 10th and 11th goals in as many games in Montral Impact's 2-1 win over Toronto FC last night.

The former Chelsea man, now 37, helped himself to a couple of delightful back-heeled goals in the space of two second-half minutes to effectively shore up the victory...

Both goals came on MLS 'Decision Day', i.

On This Day In 1863: Meeting In Covent Garden Pub Leads To Formation Of The Football Association

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The old Freemason's Tavern in Covent Garden,London (Photo: The FA)

Back in 1863, the heated debate in football circles centred around such issues as whether ‘hacking' – or kicking your opponent on the leg – should be allowed or not, as well as whether the use of hands as well as feet in the outfield should be permitted.

Leicester City Boss Claudio Ranieri Finally Fulfils ‘Clean Sheet’ Pizza Promise (Photo)

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The despondentlook of a man faced with a hefty pizza bill

Thanks to a 1-0 victory over Crystal Palace at the King Power, Leicester City finally kept their first clean sheet of the season thus leaving manager Claudio Ranieri needing to keep up his end of a long-standing bargain.

Back in September, Ranieripromised to treat his players to pizza if they managed to keep a clean sheet and, having powered their way to fifth in the Premier League table thanks to a fantastic run of results, the Foxes finally managed to prevent their opponents from scoring atthe tenth attempt against Palace on Saturday.

Shirt Shambles: Newcastle Manage To Spell Chancel Mbemba’s Name Wrong For Big Sunderland Derby (Photo)

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Whether the bustling derby day atmosphere got the better of the Newcastle United kit department we'll perhaps never know, but it just so happened that all the while he was busy getting spanked 3-0 by Sunderland, Chancel Mbemba also suffered the ignominy of playing the entire miserable match in a misspelled shirt.

‘F**king Hell, It’s Men Against Boys’ – Bournemouth Vow To Probe Foul-Mouthed PA System Incident During Tottenham Game

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Bournemouth have vowed to look into an incident that saw abit of fruity languageaccidentally broadcast over the public address system at Dean Court during yesterday's 5-1 thumping against Tottenham.

Toward the end of the game, the phrase "F**king hell, it was like men against boys" was heard loud and clear over the stadium loudspeakers.

Barnsley Fan Rescued From Oakwell By Firefighters After Falling Asleep On Toilet At Half-Time And Waking Up Seven Hours Later

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As if having to sit through a 1-0 home defeat against Fleetwood Town wasn't bad enough, one Barnsley fan suffered prolonged agony at Oakwell on Saturday after accidentally falling asleep on the stadium toilets.

The fan had reportedly fallen asleep on the toilet at half-time and then woken up some seven hours after the final whistle only to find he'd been locked inside the ground.

The Best Bits: Man Utd 0-0 Man City (Photos)

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Sunday's Manchester derby produced little in the way of 'best bits', it's fair to say, with the two sides contributing to a dour contest which would end, unsurprisingly, in a goalless draw.

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Just a day after turning 30, Wayne Rooney must have been feeling the effects of too much cake as he produced a lifeless performance in attack for the hosts.

The Best Bits: Liverpool 1-1 Southampton (Photos)

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Jurgen Klopp remains without a victory with Liverpool after his third game in charge ended in a 1-1 draw with Southampton.

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Liverpool started with Divock Origi in a lone striking role, but once again the Belgian youngster failed to look the part.

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The Best Bits: Bournemouth 1-5 Tottenham (Photos)

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Harry Kane netted a hat-trick as a rampant Tottenham side battered Bournemouth at Dean Court on Sunday.

The Cherries did get off to the perfect start, with Matt Ritchie netting the quickest goal in the Premier League this season, after just 49 seconds.

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However, within eight minutes the Lilywhites were level, with Kane converting a penalty.

Time’s Up For Tim: Sherwood Axed By Aston Villa After Just Eight Months In Job

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Always a man to wear his heart on his sleeve, except when he was wearing a gillet, Tim Sherwood was given the elbow by the powers-that-be at Aston Villa on Sunday afternoon, after just eight months in charge.

Defeat to Swansea City on Saturday sealed the 46-year-old's fate, with his Villa side languishing in the drop-zone courtesy of a measly four points from their opening 10 Premier League games.

Professional Cockey Danny Dyer Films A Forlorn-Looking Jose Mourinho In The West Ham Stands (Video)

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Danny Dyer, the Dick van Dyke of the 21st Century, was up to his old cheeky chappiness at the Boleyn Ground on Saturday, during West Ham's 2-1 win against Chelsea. The gobshite geezer, who is rumoured to have more rabbit than Sainsbury's, managed to catch a downbeat-looking Jose Mourinho on camera, after the Blues' boss had been sent to the stands.

The Best Bits: Arsenal 2-1 Everton (Photos)

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At a rain-soaked Emirates Stadium on Saturday evening, Arsenal battled to a 2-1 win against Everton to move top of the Premier League table, at least for one day.

Arsene Wenger rested Theo Walcott, with Olivier Giroud starting in attack while Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain filled in for the injured Aaron Ramsey on the right-flank.

The Best Bits: West Ham 2-1 Chelsea (Photos)

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Chelsea's nightmare season shows no sign of improving after the Blues went down 2-1 at the Boleyn Ground in a game which saw Nemanja Matic sent off and Jose Mourinho sent to the stands.

Mauro Zarate put the Hammers ahead after just 17 minutes, firing home after the Blues failed to clear Dmitri Payet's corner.

Snapshot: Jose Mourinho Cowers In West Ham Box As Andy Carroll Heads Winner Against Chelsea…

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Jose Mourinho was banishedto the stands during Chelsea's 2-1 loss against West Ham this afternoon forreportedly attempting to barge into the referee's room at half-time.

This meant theBluesboss was forced to watch Andy Carroll ram home the winner for the Hammers from the (dis)comfort of the home side's directors box.

Bayern Munich Celebrate 1,000th Bundesliga Win With Cracking Interactive Instagram Collage (Photos)

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Given their indomitable form it was little more than a foregone conclusion, but Bayern Munich spanked Cologne 4-0 at the Allianz Arena this afternoon to bring up the club's 1,000th Bundesliga win.

Goals from Arjen Robben, Arturo Vidal, Robert Lewandowski and Thomas Muller saw Bayern romp to victory, with the club's official Instagram account unleashing a fabulous collage to mark the milestone, featuring brilliant archive shots and footage of historic glories past.

Brutal: Carlos Tevez Gets Flipped Inside-Out By Horrendous Tackle From Lanus Defender Gustavo Gomez (Video)

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Looking more like a Mortal Kombat fatality, Carlos Tevez almost had his left leg amputated in the Copa Argentina last night after a horrendously poor tackle from Lanus defender Gustavo Gomez turned the Boca Juniors striker inside-out.

Gomez came scything into Tevez from behind and clattered the former Man City man up in the air, receiving a swift and straight red card for his troubles.

Police May Investigate Robert Lewandowski For ‘Drinking Champagne In Public’ After Poland’s Euro 2016 Qualification

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In what is hard to see as anything other than a flagrant waste of time and money, it's being reported that Robert Lewandowski may find himself at the centre of a police investigation after he brazenly swigged from a champagne bottle following Poland's recent qualification for Euro 2016.

Lewandowski scored what proved to be the winning goal as Poland beat the Republic of Ireland 2-1 to seal their place at next summer's tournament, with the Bayern Munich striker enjoying a gulp or two of bolly on the pitch as the players celebrated.

Gary Neville Pays For Showers, Toilets And Lighting To Make Hotel Site Habitable For Homeless Squatters

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You may remember earlier in the week when we brought you news of Gary Neville and Ryan Giggs doing the decent thing by letting a local group of homeless activists take up residence in the old Manchester stock exchange over winteras the former Manchester United pair continue to renovate the building into a new luxury hotel.

Sheffield Weds Fans Tumble Out Of Stands Trying To Grab Barry Bannan’s Shirt (Video)

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Friday's night's South Yorkshire derby saw Sheffield Wednesday enjoy a 2-1 win away a Rotherham, a result which sees the in-form Owls go ninth in the Championship table. Not surprisingly, the win got the travelling Wednesday fans rather excited.

After the game, Scottish midfielder Barry Bannan went over the Owl's fans to throw his shirt into the crowd, only for a handful of the fans to get a little over-excited and tumble out of the stand.

Carlo Ancelotti To Appear In New Star Trek Movie After Landing Small Cameo Role

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Beam me up 'Lotti!

With a sabbatical year to fill, Carlo Ancelotti has decided to fritter away a few weeks of his spare time by filming a cameo appearancein the new Star Trek movie.

According to Gazzetta, Ancelotti will appear as a doctor in 'Star Trek Beyond' after landing the role through his close personal friend, actress Zoe Saldana who plays Lieutenant Uhura in the reboot of the classic sci-fi franchise.

Ex-Man City Defender Sun Jihai Inducted Into National Football Hall of Fame, Just in Time For Visit Of Chinese President

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Bobby Charlton, Paul Gascoigne, Sir Alex Ferguson and Sir Alf Ramsey just some of the great names previously indicted into the National Football Hall of Fame in Manchester. Well, you can now add former Manchester City full-back Sun Jihai to that list of luminaries, after the Chinese player was inducted into the Hall of Fame on Friday.

Louis Van Gaal And Arsene Wenger Are At Opposite Ends Of The Emotional Spectrum When It Comes To The Premier League’s Christmas Schedule

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It's that time of year again, when Christmas is coming, the goose is getting fat and the same tedious annual debate about the Premier League's winter break or lack thereof farts back into life.

Having managed exclusively in leaguesthat observe the practice of footballing hibernation before arriving at Manchester United, Louis van Gaalhas been very outspoken of late about the Premier League's festive schedule.

Man City: Sergio Aguero Grabs Selfie With Chinese President And Some Other Flabby-Faced Pillock (Photo)

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With Chinese president Xi Jinping in town on official state business, Man City crock Sergio Aguero seized his chance to snag a quick selfie with the visiting dignitary at the club's training compound.

Nice of Kun to completely ignore the other flabby-faced plum that managed to wriggle into the photo.

Football Art: Freelance Illustrator Edward Mund Caricatures 60 Greats Of European Football (Photos)

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What you see above you is the work of freelance illustrator Edward Mund the brains behind Dotmund in which he charts 60 of the greats of European football from 1956 onwards.

We've split the ensemble in half and blown it up here to give you a better look at the cracking caricatures on offer.

Match Of The Day To Be Streamed Live On Facebook For First Time Ever…Sort Of…Ish

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They may be 50 years old but they're certainly not stuck in their ways at Match of the Day, oh no far from it.

As of this coming Saturday, the BBC will stream a live broadcast on the official Match of the Day Facebook page as a precursor to the main highlights programme which will, among other things, reveal the BBC One show's full running order.

On This Day In 1963: FA Centenary Match Sees England Beat Everyone Else In The World At The Same Time

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England captain Jimmy Armfield greets the Rest of the World captain Alfredo di Stefano as referee R. Davidson (of Scotland) looks on (Photo by Popperfoto/Getty Images)

To celebrate the centenary of the Football Association, a team made up of the best eleven players from all over the world was invited to play against the Three Lions in a special exhibition match atWembley Stadium on 23rd October, 1963.

Europa League: Plucky Lokomotiv Moscow Pitch Invader Evades Stadium Security In Style! (Video)

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While we're sure Lokomotiv Moscow's 1-1 draw with Besiktas in the Europa League last night made for perfectly acceptable viewing, the real entertainment was being generated in the crowd.

At one point an intrepid Lokomotiv fan summoned up the gumption to make his way out onto the pitch in time honoured fashion.

Ex-Bolton Striker Mario Jardel Caught By Airport Security With 10kg Of Fish In His Luggage

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"Quick lads, I've got 15 tins of pilchards stuffed down me shorts!"

Now there's aheadline that doesn't crop up very often!

Former Brazil, Porto and Bolton striker Mario Jardel has been caught attempting to carry10kg of fish through airport security in Porto Alegre.

According to Globo, Jardel had his luggage seized after returning from a trip to Portugal, with officials confiscating 10kg of cod, several bags of nuts and roughly 1.

Europa League: Kris Commons Throws Massive Wobbler After Being Subbed Off During Celtic’s 3-1 Defeat Against Molde (Video)

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Photo: Sky Sports

Celtic slumped to yet another miserable away defeat in the Europa League last night, going down 3-1 to Molde in Ole Gunnar Solskjaer's first game in charge since his return to the reigning Norwegian champions.

It would appear that the mood was not great within the Celtic camp with Kris Commons, who scored the Bhoys' sole consolation goal, throwing a massive tantrum after being subbed off by Ronny Deila after just 66 minutes.

Europa League – The Best Bits: Liverpool 1-1 Rubin Kazan (Photos & Highlights)

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Jurgen Klopp oversaw his second draw in a row since taking over at Liverpool, as the Reds failed to beat 10-man Rubin Kazan at Anfield.

The hosts started well, with Emre Can firing just wide.

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However, it was thevisitors who took the lead after just 14 minutes, courtesy of a superb effort fromMarko Devic.

Europa League – The Best Bits: Anderlecht 2-1 Tottenham (Photos & Highlights)

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Tottenham threw away a one-goal lead to lose away in Anderlecht on Thursday night, a result which sees the north Londoners drop to second in Group J.

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The visitors took the lead after just four minutes when Christian Eriksen fired home after some poor defending from Anderlecht.

Retro Football: 12 Corking Photos Of Johan Cruyff In His 1970s Pomp

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It would appear that the ciggieshave finally caught up to Johan Cruyff with the sad confirmation todaythat the 68-year-old Holland legend has been diagnosed with lung cancer.

One of football's most unashamedsmokers, there are tales of Cruyff chuffing his way throughnot one but two cigarettesover the course of a game during his time at Barcelona;one in the tunnel on the way into the dressing room, another in the showers after the final whistle.

Ex-Derby Player Stefano Eranio Sacked By Swiss TV Channel Over Dodgy Racist Remarks Made Live On Air

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Photo: Piero Cruciatti/LaPresse

Former Derby County and Italy winger Stefano Eranio has been sackedby Swiss television company RSI after making some decidedly iffy comments while criticising Roma defenderAntonio Rüdiger live on air.

Eranio was in the studio to analyse Roma's 4-4 drawagainst Bayer Leverkusen in the Champions League on Tuesday evening.

Official: The Crowd Goes Mild As Celtic Sign Carlton Cole On Freebie Deal

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Photo: SNS

You might want to position yourself over yourVictorian fainting couch before you read this because Celtic have only gone and signed Carlton Cole!

The 32-year-old former West Ham man has signed on a freebie after spending the past few months training with the Bhoys.

It's reported thatcontract, which runs until the end of next season, is worth £15,000-a-week.

UEFA To Charge Man City Fans For Heinous Crime Of Booing The Champions League Anthem

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UEFA are set to throw the book at Man City fans after they carried on with their traditional booing of the Champions League anthem before last night's group stage match against Sevilla.

City fans have been booing the anthem ever since the club was stung by UEFA's Financial Fair Play rules in 2013, and now it would appear thatthe UEFA Thought Police have had quite enough of their flagrant insubordination.

Hong Kong Toy Company Make Nazi Soldier Doll That Looks Suspiciously Like Bastian Schweinsteiger (Photos)

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Hong Kong toy manufacturers DiD have hit the headlines in the German press today after it was discovered that one of their figurines bears an astonishing resemblance to a certain Manchester United midfielder.

Indeed, the "WWII Germany Army Supply Duty" doll looks suspiciously like Bastian Schweinsteiger a likeness you could perhaps write off as mere coincidence until you discoverthat DiD have even gone and named the Nazi solider "Bastian".

On This Day In 1972: Car Crash Robs The Great Gordon Banks Of The Sight In His Right Eye

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Stoke City 'keeper Gordon Banks, 1970

I can still remember hearing the dreadful news on the radio as a seven-year-old. Gordon Banks had been involved in a car crash a shard of glass in his right eye was threatening to end his career.

Banks was England's undisputedNo.1, one of the finest goalkeepers in the world, and a demigod to all football-obsessed kids everywhere.

Reports: Holland, Ajax And Barcelona Legend Johan Cruyff ‘Diagnosed With Lung Cancer’

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According to widespread reports emanating in the Spanish press this morning, Johan Cruyff has been diagnosed with lung cancer.

As reported by Catalunya Radio and RAC1, Cruyff reportedly discovered on Tuesday that he was suffering from the disease.

As such, the 68-year-old Ajax, Barcelona and Holland legend and is now set to undergo further tests to ascertain how advanced his cancer is.

Champions League – The Best Bits: Man City 2-1 Sevilla (Photos & Highlights)

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A superb individual goal from Kevin De Bruyne bagged Manchester City all three points at the Etihad in an exciting clash with Sevilla.

The visitors started brightly with their quick counter-attacking causing problems for a City side who looked open at the back from the off.

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Fallon d’Floor: CSKA’s Pontus Wernbloom Produces Laughably Crap Delayed Dive Against Manchester United (Video)

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Speaking as members of the increasingly scant minority of people who actually prefer football without all the diving, conniving, wimpiness, cheating, feigning and deception, all we could do was laugh heartily when CSKA Moscow midfielder Pontus Wernbloom pulled this little beauty out of the bag against Manchester United.

Champions League – The Best Bits: CSKA Moscow 1-1 Man Utd (Photos & Highlights)

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Anthony Martial's first Champions League goal secured a share of the points for Manchester United in Moscow on Wednesday night.

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The Red Devils started with Martial on the flanks and Wayne Rooney in the central striking berth.

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However, it was CSKA who would draw first blood.

Violence Erupts In Streets As Moronic Hoodlums Clash Before Man City’s Champions League Tie Against Sevilla (Video)

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Photo: Cavendish Press (via Mirror Football)

It's with our heads hung that we're reporting that violence has broken out in Manchester this evening mere hours before the Champions League game between Man City and Sevilla.

Twitter is currently awash with photos and footage of City and Sevilla fans scuffling in the streets, hurling chairs at one another and generally behaving like utter louts.

Aussie Minnows Hume City FC Poised To Pull Off Audacious Signing Of Former World Cup Winner On One-Match Deal

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Word on the wire this afternoon is that Hume City FC, who currently play in the sprawling regional second tier of the Australian football system, are currently poised to pull off one of the most audacious transfer coups.

Hume City, who boast an average attendance of just a few hundred fans at their bijou 5,000-capacity ABD Stadium, are scheduled to take on Melbourne Victoryin the semi-finals of the FFA Cup nextWednesday, and as such are keen to bolster their team to take on the A-League big boys.

Man City Celebrate ‘Back To The Future Day’ By Having Bacary Sagna Recreate Original Movie Trailer (Video)

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As you're no doubt aware, today is'Back To The Future Day', i.e, October 21st, 2015 the very date that Marty McFly and Doc Brown set their flux capacitor to visit in Back To The Future II.

By this time, we were all supposed to be flitting around on hoverboards, eating dehydrated pizza and communicating via fax machines.

On This Day In 1984: Goals Prove Scarce On Quite Possibly The Dullest Day In Serie A History

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Image: Italia1910.com

We all know that a lack of goals doesn't necessarily mean a lack of excitement, but still 21st October 1984 proved to be quite possibly the dullest game in Serie A history.

On that day, Napoli-Milan; Ascoli-Atalanta and Roma-Verona all produced barren 0-0 draws, while Fiorentina-Avellino; Inter-Como; Torino-Lazio and Udinese-Sampdoria all ended in similarly unentertaining 1-0 wins for the home side.

Shit Lookalike: Steve Evans & Hoggish Greedly (Captain Planet’s Arch Nemesis)

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We always knew Leeds United's latest ex-manager-in-waiting, Steve Evans, had a whiff of the porcineEco-Villainabout him.

Turns out he's been moonlighting for several years as Hoggish Greedly, arch-nemesis of Captain Planet...

Sadly, we can't take any credit for this little corker, with the Spotter's Badge going to @RandomVentures having been brought to our attention by @NarrowTheAngle.

Bayern Munich Supporters’ Group Thank Arsenal Fans For Applauding Their Ticket Price Protest

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Droves of Bayern Munich fans purposefully missed the first five minutes oflast night's Champions League tie against Arsenal in protest over the exorbitant £64 ticket price at the Emirates.

In comparison, the cheapest season ticket at the Allianz Arena is around£104.

Anyway, having missed roughly £4's worth of the match, the Bayern fans began to mill into the away section and find their seats, as the home fans applauded their efforts en masse.

Champions League – The Best Bits: Dynamo Kiev 0-0 Chelsea (Photos & Highlights)

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Chelsea produced an impressive and solid display in the Ukraine on Tuesday to secure a well-deserved point against Dynamo Kiev.

Jose Mourinho started with Kurt Zouma at right-back, a tactical decision made to counter the attacking threat of wingerAndriy Yarmolenko.

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Champions League – The Best Bits: Arsenal 2-0 Bayern Munich (Photos & Highlights)

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Late goals from Olivier Giroud and Mesut Ozil secured a precious home win for Arsenal against Bayern Munich on Tuesday night, a result which revitalises the Gunners' Champions League campaign.

Petr Cech was back in goal for the hosts and the former Chelsea man was superb throughout, saving from Arturo Vidal and Robert Lewandowski among others.

Retro Football: Southend And Bristol Rovers Enjoy Merry Old Ding-Dong At The Greyhound Track, 1952 (Video)

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The Southend United team of the early 1950s

Here's a wee swatch of a delightfully prim and proper television match reportfrom the Pathé archive, which captures a merry old ding-dong between Southend United and Bristol Rovers in the 1952 FA Cup.

The footageserves as a fascinating window into the way the game used to be played eyes peeled for a few choice 'keeper chargesandsome decidedly "sturdy"tackling on an absolute bog of a pitch.

James McClean Writes Open Letter To West Brom Fans To Once Again Explain Anti-Poppy Stance

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With Remembrance Day coming up in early November, West Brom winger James McClean has taken preemptive steps to help diffuse the inevitable controversy that continually surrounds his refusal to wear a poppy stitched onto his shirt.

To the vast majority of Europe, the Poppy stands as a simple symbol of commemoration and appreciation for the men that gave their lives while fighting for their country.

On This Day In 1996: Philippe Albert Chips In As Newcastle Stick Five Past Manchester United (Video)

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During the previous season, Newcastle had been pipped to the Premier League title by Manchester United despite having been 12 points clear in January.

Famously, it all proved too much for poor old Kevin Keegan, whose mind finallyunravelled...

Anyway, skip forward a season and the Magpies were keen to make a point – and did so with a stunning display of free-flowing football in front of a bustling capacity crowd at St James' Park.

UAE Footballer Abdullah Qassem Jailed For Three Months For Criticising His National Team Manager

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United Arab Emirates footballerAbdullah Qassem has been sentenced to prison for the heinous crime of criticising his national team coach on video.

Qassem has been sent down for three months after a video emerged online of him making "indecent gestures" towardUAE boss Mahdi Ali.

According to the Daily Mail, Qassem was angry having been overlooked for selection by Ali one too many times.

Chelsea: Eden Hazard Causes Social Media Tizz By ‘Liking’ Instagram Post Linking Him With Real Madrid

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Eden Hazard caused a bit of a social media tizz overnight when the Chelsea winger 'liked' an erroneous Instagram post linking him with a move to Real Madrid.

The 433 post cited rumoursin the Spanish press that Hazard is "on Real Madrid's radar", with a transfer scheduled to go ahead in 2016.

FIFA Ballon d’Or 2015 Shortlist Announced, All Usual Suspects Included As Just One British Player Makes The Grade

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A couple of weeks after the 53-man preliminary long-list was leaked, FIFA have found the time to whittle down their Ballon d'Or short-list to just 23 hopefuls.

Five Premier League playershave made the grade with Sergio Aguero, Kevin De Bruyne, Yaya Toure,Eden Hazard and Alexis Sanchez all in the mix, while Gareth Bale constitutes the only British entrant this time round.

David Beckham To Play Seven Matches On Seven Continents In Seven Days To Celebrate UNICEF Anniversary

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David Beckham is planning to play seven matches on seven continents in the space of seven days to celebrate his 10-year anniversary as a UNICEF Goodwill Ambassador.

Firstwill come a charity match at Old Trafford, withBeckham's Great Britain XI pitted against Zinedine Zidane's Rest of the World sideandall proceeds going to Beckham's new '7' UNICEF fund, launched earlier this year.

Memphis Depay Criticised For ‘Dressing Like A Peruvian Pan Flute Player’ To Report For International Duty

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Photo: Jerry Lampen/AFP/Getty Images

Having gone off the boil for Manchester United of late, Memphis Depay is also facing criticism for his recent performances at international level too.

Depay, who has something of a reputation for his suspect attitude in his native country, failed to provide any kind of creative catalyst as the Netherlands' Euro 2016 qualification campaign went tits up last week, with ex-Twente manager Co Adriaanse sticking his oar in in the aftermath.

‘I Am Not Happy’ – Yaya Toure Moans About Being Criticised, Not Getting Any Respect, Yadda Yadda Yadda…

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It's been a couple of months since the last tantrumsoYaya Toure, regular as clockwork, has once again been bellyaching about his miserable lot in life.

While it doesn't take an expert to identify the fact that Toure has beenstruggling for consistency so far this season, the Man City man is mortally upset that some horriblemeaniesout there have been pointing it out in public.

Liverpool: Jurgen Klopp Reckons James Milner Is ‘The Complete Footballer’

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Despite the new Liverpool looking a lot like the old Liverpool in Jurgen Klopp's opening 0-0 stalemate against Tottenham, Jurgen Klopp has insisted that there is no need to rip everything up and start again as far as his Anfield fixer-upper project is concerned.

Why, the German coacheven believesthe Reds squad boastsa "complete footballer" among their number that man, of course, being James Milner.

On This Day In 1993: ‘It’s Almost Fantasy Football’ As Norwich Beat Bayern Munich In Germany

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Photo via Norwich Talk

One of the unlikeliest football results in the history of everything ever was also one which provided English football with a desperately needed spark.

The so-called ‘country bumpkins' of Norwich City beat German aristocrats Bayern Munich 2-1 on their own turf in the UEFA Cup, prompting one of John Motson's most famous lines.

Volunteer Fan Replaces Fourth Official For Second Half Of Portsmouth’s Win Over Newport (Video)

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Image: Sky Sports

Portsmouth squeaked a narrow 1-0 win over bottom side Newport County to keep themselves within three points of the top of the League Two table, though over on the touchline was where the real drama unfolded.

After referee James Adcock pulled up injured a few minutes before half-time he was gamely replaced by his fourth official Wayne Barratt.

Manchester United Legends Ryan Giggs And Gary Neville Allow Homeless Squatters To Stay In Their Hotel Over Winter

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Manchester United legends Ryan Giggs and Gary Neville are happy to let homeless squatters move into their hotel development over winter.

The pair are currently renovating the old Manchester stock exchange building into a "luxury boutique hotel", though the development has recently become occupied by homeless activists.

Chinese President Xi Jinping Has Dream Of Visiting Manchester United Thwarted By City-Supporting Council Leaders

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Being an avid Manchester United fan, Chinese president Xi Jinping was rather hoping to squeeze in a tour of Old Trafford during his upcoming four-day State visit to Britain.

As such, Jinping asked his aides to set a little time aside for him to visit the stadium of his favourite team, only to see his grand plans nixed by local council leaders.

Another One Bites The Dust: Leeds Sack Manager Uwe Rosler After Five Months

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Death, taxes, and Leeds canning their manager after a few months in charge these are the only true inevitables in life.

Yep, despite only taking charge in May, Uwe Rosler has been fired by Leeds this morning, thusleaving fidgety owner Massimo Cellino looking for a sixth head coach since taking over at Elland Road in April of 2014.

FAIL: Hapless Greek Stretcher-Bearer Falls Over, Drops Injured Player Twice (Video)

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Poor old Ergotelis midfielder Leonardo Koutris. Playing against AE Larissa in the Greek Second Division at the weekend, the player went down injured. However, if he thought he'd soon be back up on his feet in a jiffy after some tender loving care, he was very much mistaken.

Cue the arrival on the scene of a couple of gormless stretcher-bearers, who manhandled Koutris (half) onto the stretcher before re-enacting a scene from the Chuckle Brothers.

Referee Keith Stroud Forced To Retire Injured After Being Bulldozed By Hull City’s Chuba Akpom (Video)

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Image: Sky Sports

Most of the players managed to get through Saturday's Championship clash between Sheffield Wednesday and Hull City relatively unscathed, but sadly the fixture still managed to produce one notable casualty.

Referee Keith Stroud was forced to hobbleoff the pitch as the clock ticked over into injury time when he was unceremoniously poleaxed by Hull striker Chuba Akpom.

Euro 2016: Republic of Ireland Face Bosnia and Herzegovina In Tricky Play-Off Draw

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Sunday morning saw the draw for the EURO 2016 Play-offs, with the Republic of Ireland set for a difficult set of games against Bosnia and Herzegovina.

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Ranked 30th in the FIFA listings, 13 places above Poland who beat the Irish to that second Group D, and 24 places ahead of the Boys in Green themselves, Bosnia boast the likes of Roma pair Edin Dzeko andMiralem Pjanić and Lazio winger Senad Lulic.

The Best Bits: Watford 0-3 Arsenal (Photos & Highlights)

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Arsenal kept the pressure on league leaders Manchester City, courtesy of an impressive 3-0 win away at Watford on Saturday.

Starting with a full-strength XI, the Gunners were pushed all the way in the first-half by a hard-working and disciplined Watford side.

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Alexis Sanchez tested Heurelho Gomes with a powerful effort.

Dick Move: Sevilla Striker Kevin Gameiro Nudges One In With His Old Chap To Equalise Against Eibar (Video)

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Sevilla just about managed to escape from high-flying Eibar with a point in La Liga yesterday after finding themselves 1-0 down after just eight minutes.

The equaliser didn't come until the 71st minute, when stocky striker Kevin Gameiro used a particularly delicate part of his anatomy to expertly steer Vicente Iborra's cross into the back of the net.

Stevenage ‘Keeper Jesse Joronen Scores Freakish Goal Against Wycombe Wanderers (Video)

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Photo: BBC Sport/Rex Features

Stevenage 'keeper Jesse Joronen completed his initiation and officially joined the Ancient Masonic Order of the Goalscoring Goalkeepers yesterday when the Finnishstopper nonchalantly opened the scoring against Wycombe Wanderers in League Two from all of 75 yards.

The Best Bits: Man City 5-1 Bournemouth (Photos & Highlights)

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A Raheem Sterling hat-trick helped Manchester City to an easy 5-1 mauling of top-tier new-boys Bournemouth at the Etihad.

The game was only seven minutes old when Sterling netted from close-range.

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Even without the injured Sergio Aguero, the Citizens tore the Cherries apart time and time again, and went 2-0 up just four minutes later, with Wilfried Bony scoring after Adam Federici (who replaced Artur Boruc in the warm-up) had spilled a cross.

The Best Bits: Chelsea 2-0 Aston Villa (Photos & Highlights)

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Chelsea got back to winning-ways on Saturday courtesy of a deserved, if still not totally convincing, 2-0 win at home to Aston Villa.

Jose Mourinho started with Baba Rahmann on the left of the back four, with Cesar Azpilicueta taking over the right-back berth from Branislav Ivanovic while Ruben Loftus-Cheek started in place of Nemanja Matic.

The Best Bits: Everton 0-3 Man Utd (Photos & Highlights)

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Manchester United produced a convincing performance at Goodison Park on Saturday, with the Red Devils registering a deserved 3-0 win.

The day saw the passing of Everton's legendary manager Howard Kendall at the age of just 69, a man who oversaw the club's most successful title-winning period in the 1980s.

The Best Bits: Tottenham 0-0 Liverpool (Photos & Highlights)

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Jurgen Klopp's long-awaited first game in English football proved to be a rather underwhelming affair at White Hart Lane, with neither side possessing the requisite cutting edge up front to seal a victory.

The Reds started brightly, pressing the ball in true Klopp style.

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On This Day In 1973: Cheers Of A Clown As Jan Tomaszewski Puts Paid To England’s World Cup Qualification

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It may have been the day that England finally came to terms with the fact it had become just another football nation.

Insular arrogance had been punctured once before when the Magical Magyars of Gustav Sebes' majestic Hungary side had run rings around Walter Winterbottom's Englandoutfitin 1953, beating them 6-3 and becoming the first country to win at Wembley since 1863.

RIP Howard Kendall – Everton’s Greatest Ever Manager Passes Away At Age Of 69

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Everton manager Howard Kendall with the Bell's English Manager of the Year trophy, London, 15th May 1987

Sad news is reaching us at Pies this morning that Howard Kendall has passed away.

As well as representing the club with distinction as a player, Kendall is also the most successful manager in the history of Everton Football Club, havingtaken charge of the Toffees on no less than three separate occasions winning two league titles, an FA Cup and a Cup Winners' Cup during the 1980s.

Ex-Dortmund Trooper Kevin Grosskreutz Warns Liverpool Players To Prepare For ‘Klopp Slaps’

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With Jurgen Klopp's first game as Liverpool manager coming later today, one of his ex-Dortmund charges has warned the Reds' players to prepare themselves for the German coach's brand of uniquely aggressive affection.

Speaking fromexperience, Grosskreutz, who was part of Klopp's back-to-back title-winning Dortmund squad, has informed hisLiverpudlian counterpartsthat while Klopp will 'Klopp slap' them about a bit, it's absolutely nothing to worry about; it's just his way of showing that he cares.

Shocked Faces All Round As Joe Cole Joins Coventry City On Loan From Aston Villa

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Who says the domestic game grinds to a half during international breaks? Shortly before close of play on Friday evening, League One side Coventry City pulled off an outlandish transfer coup by signing Joe Cole from Aston Villa.

Former England international Cole, 33, has joined the Sky Blues on a 35-day emergency loan deal.

Fenerbahce Respond To Bogus Tabloid Report By Authorising Turkish Newspaper To Buy Radamel Falcao On Their Behalf

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After happening across a story in the Turkish press linking them with a move for Radamel Falcao, Fenerbahce devised a novel way to call out the newspaper responsible on their spurious bullhonky.

The report first appeared in the Fotomaç daily sports newspaper earlier in the week, which claimed that Fenerbahce were running the rule over a January loan deal forFalcao.

On This Day In 2002: David Seaman Calls Time On 14-Year England Career In Unfitting Style

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Safe hands

It wasn't the way he would have wanted it to end – in fact, David Seaman will be very disappointed about the manner in which his long and largely unblemished internationalcareer came to an end.

After 75 caps won between the sticks for his country, the Arsenal and England goalkeeper bowed out by letting a goal in straight from a corner against Macedonia.

‘Super Manly’ Eric Cantona Poses Nude On Front Cover Of Elle Magazine (Photo)

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If you've spent the last however many yearshankering to see Eric Cantona in a state of undress then today, my strange friend, is your lucky day.

Indeed,Cantona, 49, has posed nude for the front cover of the latest edition of Elle magazine alongside his good lady wife, French actress and director Rachida Brakni.

Al Ahly Winger Ramadan Sobhi Sparks Multi-Man Brawl With Unnecessary Showboating…Again (Video)

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Photo: Sport Ahram

For the second time in just a few short months, young Al Ahly winger Ramadan Sobhi found himself on the wrong end of a whuppingafter goading his opponents.

Back in July, Sobhi was subjected to a kicking courtesy of the Zamalek defence after the 18-year-old took the widdle bystanding atop the ball mid-match, la Andrei Kanchelskis.

Paul Scholes Hammers Home Trademark 35-Yard Screamer In Hong Kong Veterans Match (Video)

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Photo: Masters Football/Facebook

John Beresford, Ben Thornley, Keith Gillespie, Sasa Illic and a whole constellation of other ex-Premier League stars turned out in Hong Kong last night for a masters exhibition match against a team of local veterans.

Despite the other star names on the bill, it was former Manchester United midfielder Paul Scholes remember him?

Premier League Snapshot: Anthony Martial Wins Player Of The Month For September, Maurico Pochettino Snags Manager Of The Month

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Photo: Action Images/Lee Smith

Manchester United newboy Anthony Martial has been named the Premier League Player of the Month for September after hitting the ground running at Old Trafford with The Most Expensive Teenager in the World™helping himself to three goals in his first four outings as a United player.

Italian Youth Referee Suspended For Abandoning 31-0 Thrashing After Less Than An Hour

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An Italian referee, for illustrative purposes only

An Italian referee has been suspended after he saw fit to abandona recent Under-14s game when one teamwent 31-0 up with less than an hour played.

When away side Persiceto 85 stroked home their 31st unanswered goal against hosts Ponte Ronca, the 20-year-old officialbrought the game to a premature end after (quite rightly, you could argue) concluding that it was just too one-sided.

Liverpool Striker Danny Ings ‘Ruled Out For Season’ After Suffering Cruciate Knee Injury In Training

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Danny Ings has become the second Liverpool player in two days to be ruled out for the rest of the season after the striker suffered a cruciate knee injury in training.

This coming one day after young left-back Joe Gomez suffered the exact same fate while on international duty with the England Under-21 team.

Sam Allardyce Accuses Ungrateful West Ham Fans Of Being ‘Brainwashed’ And ‘Deluded’

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Routinely scorned during his time in charge of West Ham due to his agricultural approach to winning football matches, Sam Allardyce has hit back by accusing Hammersfans of being both "deluded" and "brainwashed".

Allardyce, who recently took the Sunderland manager gig after being let go by West Ham at the end of last season, also added that the fabled 'West Ham way' of playing is now nothing but a "millstone around the club's neck".

‘Still The Very Best!’ – Kidderminster Harriers Are Proud To Sell The Most Expensive Pie In British Football

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Photo: Harriers Online

As confirmed by the BBC's annual Price of Football survey, National League side Kidderminster Harriers currently boast if that's the right word the most expensive match-day pie inBritish football.

Kidderminsterare one of only four clubs in Britain to charge over £4 for a pie, along with Brighton (£4.

On This Day In 1887: Preston North End Set FA Cup Record By Scoring 26 Goals In One Match

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The Preston North End team of 1887 take on Old Carthusians in the FA Cup Sixth Round

If you know your FA Cup trivia you'll know the record score in an FA Cup match was 26-0 in the game between Preston North End and Hyde FC. Rumour has it it's where the phrase ‘getting a good hyding' comes from.

Sebastian Giovinco Scores Superb Solo Goal As Toronto FC Secure First Ever MLS Play-Off Place (Video)

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Just 24 hours after playing for Italy in their Euro 2016 qualifier against Norway, Sebastian Giovinco flew back to Canada and promptly came off the bench to score what proved to be the winning goal against New York Red Bulls as Toronto FC claimed their first ever MLS play-off spot.

With Toronto already 1-0 up through Herculez Gomez, Giovinco added a secondwith ten minutes left to play when we slalomed his way in from the left wing, shimmied past a couple of Red Bulls defenders and then swiped a left-footed shot inside the right-hand post.

Barcelona Buddies: Luis Suarez Buys Lionel Messi Some Lovely New ‘Grumpy’ Pyjamas (Photo)

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Doing his weekly big shop around Asda, Luis Suarez spotted the ideal gift for Barcelona teammate Lionel Messi in the children's nightwear aisleof the Georgesection a lovely set of Snow White & The Seven Dwarves pyjamas, size medium boys...

Gracias a mi amigo @luissuarez9 por el pijama de regalo !

Retro Football: In Praise Of FIFA 2000 And Its Flawless Footballing Realism (Video)

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EA Sports may be able to individually render each one of Lee Cattermole's eyelashes these days, but there was a time, not so very long ago, when the FIFA games were truly entrenched in the pursuit of flawlessrealism.

We're harking back to the turn of the millennium here, when EA released what was perhaps the last truly lifelikefootball video game FIFA 2000.

On This Day In 2006: Andy Cole Scores For Sixth Different Premier League Club To Equal Les Ferdinand’s Record

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When Andy "call me Andrew" Cole scored five minutes after coming on as a substitute for Portsmouth against West Ham on 14th October, 2006, he equalled the record first set by Les Ferdinand of scoring for six different Premier League clubs.

Cole's Pompey piledriver meant he'd scored top-flight goals for Newcastle, Manchester United, Blackburn Rovers, Fulham, Man City and now Pompey.

FC Metz Under-15 Youngsters Debut Hypnotic New Choreographed Training Drill (Video)

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Here we see the Children of the Corn FC Metz Under-15 side showing off their new training drill, a hypnotically choreographed warm-up wherein the youngsters line up in formation and juggle their SenseBalls in eerie, nigh-on perfect synchronisation.

In fact, it looks like something from a North Korean propaganda film.

Didcot Town’s Twitter Account Manage To Keep Their Chins Up While 14-0 Down Against MK Dons In County Cup

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They may have been pasted 14-0 by Championship side MK Dons in theBerks and Bucks County Senior Cup last night, butEvo-Stik League Southern Division side Didcot Town FC managed to keep their chins up throughout the merciless trouncing.

While Nicky Maynard, Tom Hitchcock and Kabongo Tshimanga were all busy helping themselves to hat-tricks, the Didcot Town official Twitter account managed to bring an air of brevity to the situation.

Getafe Launch New ‘Tinder-Style’ Dating App To Combat Dwindling Attendances (Video)

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Getafe have something of a reputation for being a bit short in the way of fans, with the club ending the 2014/15 season with the second lowest average attendance (just 7,753, compared with Barcelona's 77,632) in the Spanish top flight.

As such, Los Azulones have become the butt of several running jokes about their dwindling support base and sparsely populated stadium.

Netherlands Fail To Qualify For Euro 2016 As Robin Van Persie Scores Dreadful Own-Goal In Czech Defeat (Video)

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"Yep, buggered that one up"

With their fate already in other people'shands, thesilly old Netherlands lost 3-2 against the Czech Republic last night to miss out on a place at Euro 2016.

The Dutch needed to beat the Czechs and forIceland to beat Turkey in order to wash up in third place in Group A and therefore snag a play-off spot.

Retro Football: The Who, Lou Reed And Friends Play To 75,000 Fans At Charlton Athletic, 1974 (Photos & Video)

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The East Terrace at Charlton's The Valley stadium, circa early 1970s

On May 18th, 1974, Lou Reed played a gig at Charlton Athletic's The Valley ground in front of 75,000 people (well, that was the number of tickets sold, but add in the fakes and the people who jumped the turnstiles and the crowd was surely far higher).

Oopsy Daisy: Adidas Make Fair Old Gaffe With New Manchester United Retro Track Jacket (Photo)

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Image via Eurosport

By all accounts, Adidas are doing a roaring trade with their new line of retro Manchester United clobber, with the 1980s-flavoured collection taking style pointers from the last time the German sportswear giants were responsible for designing United's kits.

The latest addition to the range is the '1985 track jacket' a smart looking thing if ever there was.

Djibril Cisse Arrested Over Alleged ‘Sex Tape Blackmail’ Of Ex-France Teammate Mathieu Valbuena

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According to reports emanating from France this morning, Djibril Cisse has been arrested by police over an alleged case of blackmail of Lyon midfielder Matheiu Valbuena.

As per the AFP's wire report, Ex-Liverpool striker Cisse was one of four men taken into police custody in relation to a case that revolves around an alleged sex tape of Valbuena.

On This Day In 1993: Graham Taylor Becomes A Root Vegetable After England Get Duffed By The Dutch

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October 13th, 1993, and for reasons unbeknownst, England boss Graham Taylor decided toallow a TV documentary crew into the dugout for avital World Cup qualifier.

His reactions on a controversial and frustrating night for England would be used as a stick to beat him with as the media turned on him, but really what was shown was the human side of a man struggling against his inevitable fate.

Retro Football: Bob Mortimer Cuts Hair At The 1982 World Cup Finals

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TheWorld Cup Finals, Algorta, Spain, 16th June 1982: England fan Bob Mortimer from Middlesbrough cuts the hair of his friend Michael Dunn outside their tent at the England fans campsite.

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‘Just One Last Battle!’ – Kevin Davies Prepares To Flog Massive Star Wars Toy Collection (Photos)

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Having called time on his playing days a month or two ago, Kevin Davies is now settling into retired life.

As is usually the case, the former Southampton, Bolton and Preston striker is being forced to tighten the purse stringsand, as such, is currently in the process of flogging off his massive Star Wars toy collection estimated by the Daily Mail's experts to be valued at over £3,000.

Euro 2016 – The Best Bits: Lithuania 0-3 England (Photos & Highlights)

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A much-changed England coasted to victory in Vilnius on Monday night, a result which sees the Three Lions become only the sixth side in history to register a 100% record in their Euro qualifying campaign.

Starting with Jonjo Shelvey in a deep midfield role and Jamie Vardy on the left, the English dominated the game although the plastic pitch did make for some misjudged passes.

Slovakian Amateur Team Forced To Contend With Rather Unusual Distraction During Home Games (Video)

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We urge you to spare a sympathetic thought for TJ Tatran Čierny Balog for not only do they have to contend with being a lowlySlovakian amateurteam, they also have to put up with this nonsense over on the sidelines during their home games...

Take The Field We have never seen anything like this.

FAIL: Wigan’s Leon Barnett Posts Strong Contender For ‘Botched Throw-In Of The Season’ (Video)

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Photo: Wigan Athletic

Wigan Athletic went to Bury and came away with a 2-2 draw in League One on Sunday afternoon, with a brace of late goals putting paid to the home side's six-game winningstreak.

However, the real highlight came off the pitch just a couple of yards off it to be precise, when Latics defender Leon Barnett had an absolute shocker while attempting to gear himself up fora simple throw-in.

Zlatan Ibrahimovic Awarded Gold Record As Haunting Version Of Swedish National Anthem Passes Streaming Milestone

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My Gold Record Award for 3 000 000 Swedish streams of my version of the National anthem. Rumour has it that it's the most streamed national anthem ever... Either way, it's pretty cool.

A photo posted by IAmZlatan (@iamzlatanibrahimovic) on Oct 12, 2015 at 3:16am PDT

Zlatan Ibrahimovic has been bestowed with a special golden award after his version of the Swedish national anthem was streamed for the 3,000,000thtime in his native land recently.

Brazilian Under-20 Game Descends Into Pandemonium As 11 Red Cards Shown After Final Whistle (Video)

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It's refreshing to know that the youth football scene in Brazil is just as nuts as the senior game, with the recent Under-20 game between Sertaozinho and Flamengo de Guarulhos ending amid suitably chaotic scenes.

Shortly after Flamengo had registered a fairly ordinary 2-0 win, the game quickly descended into anarchy as scuffles broke out across the pitch.

On This Day In 1996: David Beckham Pegs Liverpool Back As Manchester United Gain Ground On Title Rivals

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12th October, 1996, and Liverpool were going into a game against Manchester United while sitting pretty at the top of the Premier League having remained unbeaten in their first eight games of the season.

United had drawn precisely half of their opening eight matches. The scene was set at Old Trafford for a classic resumption ofone of the fiercest rivalries in football.

Liverpool Fan DJ Spoony Trolls Old Trafford Crowd By Playing ‘You’ll Never Walk Alone’ (Video)

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Photo: Metro

Having landed the gig as in-house emcee for the Rugby Super League final betweenLeeds Rhinos and Wigan Warriors at Old Trafford on Saturday, celebrity Liverpool fan DJ Spoony seized theopportunity to wreak asmidgeof mischiefonManchester United's patch.

With full control over the pre-match playlist, Spoony decided to blare a decidedly Liverpudlian anthem out over United's public address system.

Euro 2016 – The Best Bits: Gibraltar 0-6 Scotland (Photos & Highlights)

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After the disappointment of Thursday's 2-2 draw with Poland and subsequent end of their qualification hopes, Scotland dusted themselves down and secured an easy 6-0 win away to Gibraltar.

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A much-changed first XI took the lead on 24 minutes, courtesy of a Russell Martin header.

Euro 2016 – The Best Bits: Poland 2-1 Republic of Ireland (Photos & Highlights)

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If the Republic of Ireland are to make it to France next summer, it will have to be via the play-offs after Martin O'Neill's charges went down 2-1 in Poland.

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The Irish needed to either win or play out a high-scoring draw (minimum 2-2) if they were to secure automatic qualification from Group D.

Euro 2016 – The Best Bits: Finland 1-1 Northern Ireland (Photos & Highlights)

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A hard-fought draw away to Finland secured top spot in Group F for the already qualified Northern Ireland on Sunday.

Having already done all the hard work against Greece on Thursday, the Northern Irish were still looking to top the group and Michael O'Neill's men started well.

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Wealdstone’s Scott Davies Scores Mammoth 75-Yarder In FA Cup Qualifier Against Brockenhurst (Video)

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Wealdstone FC did a bit of a number on Brockenhurst in an FA Cup qualifier on Saturday, winning 5-1 to coast into thefourth round of the preliminary stages.

The pick of the bunch goals-wise came from Wealdstone midfielder Scott Davies who made it 4-1 late in the game with an absolutely incredible 75-yarder.

St Etienne Hooligans Attempt To Ruin Rival Fan’s Wedding, Get The Wrong Address, Ruin Innocent Couple’s Big Day

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With domestic football on the back-burner for two weeks, the hooligansof the world have had to source their weird tribal kicks elsewhere.

Over en France, a group of baseball bat-wielding Saint Etienne ultras sought to pass the time by gate-crashing the wedding of a Lyon-supporting rival and smashing the place to smithereens.

Euro 2016 – The Best Bits: Bosnia-Herzegovina 2-0 Wales (Photos & Highlights)

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Who'd have imagined a defeat could be greeted with such joy. However, despite going down 2-0 to Bosnia and Herzegovina on Saturday night, Wales still managed to end their 57-year major finals hoodoo and qualify for next summer's Euro 2016.

Despite being without the injured Edin Dzeko, it was the visitors who started the better of the two sides, with Dzeko's Roma team-mateMiralem Pjanic impressing in midfield.

Northern Ireland Striker Kyle Lafferty Wants To Face Argentina Or Brazil At Euro 2016 Finals (Video)

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What a cheeky chappie Kyle Lafferty is. The star of Northern Ireland's historic EURO 2016 qualifying campaign, which sees Michael O'Neill's men reach a major tournament finals for the first time since 1986, was recently interviewed about next summer's competition in France.

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Liverpool Fans Produce Superb Jurgen Klopp Impersonation Clip (Video)

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I wonder what Jose Mourinho thinks of all the coverage new Liverpool boss Jurgen Klopp is getting? On the one hand, it does deflect from Chelsea's dismal start to the new season, but you can't help thinking that Jose is just a teeny bit jealous at the media love-in for Klopp.

Anyway, adding to the mountain of coverage for the former Borussia Dortmund coach comes this video from the Klopp for Kop Facebook page, where Liverpool fans have produced this very sharp video featuring the man of the moment himself (via a fine and funny impersonation).

Euro 2016 – The Best Bits: England 2-0 Estonia (Photos & Highlights)

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England kept alive their 100% record in the Euro 2016 qualifiers courtesy of a comfortable if unremarkable 2-0 win against Estonia at Wembley.

The injured Wayne Rooney received a Golden Boot for his 50th England goal from Bobby Charlton ahead of the game.

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The Three Lions started with Ryan Bertrand at left-back and James Milner in a holding midfield role.

Official: Sam Allardyce Appointed Sunderland Manager On Two-Year Deal

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It went through before close of play last night, but Sam Allardyce has taken up the challengeof delivering Sunderland from relegation this season, having signed a two-year deal at the Stadium of Light.

Allardyce has been out of work since he was canned by West Ham over the summer.

In a statement on the Sunderland website, owner Ellis Short felt compelled to stressthat Allardyce had taken the job of his own free will:

I would like to assure our fans that once Dick made us aware of his intention to leave, Lee Congerton oversaw an organised and structured recruitment process, that bore very little resemblance to what has been described in the media.

The One And Only Jeff Stelling Appointed Honorary President Of Hartlepool United

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Being the club's second most famous fan (behind Meatloaf, of course), it should come as little to no surprise that Jeff Stelling has today been sworn in as honorary president of Hartlepool United.

Stelling replaces Hartlepool's outgoing honorary president, beloved politician Peter Mandelson, who has served in the rolefor many years.

Retro Football: 1986 World Cup Panini Album Shows How Northern Ireland Shaped Up Last Time They Reached A Major Tournament (Photos)

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Last night, the Northern Ireland vintage of 2015 achievedthe improbable by securing themselves a berth at Euro 2016 with a comprehensive 3-1 victory over Greece at Windsor Park.

Beforethen, it'd been nigh-on three decades since theNorthern Ireland national sidehad last appeared at a big tournament namely, the 1986 World Cup in Mexico.

Bradford City Put Out Desperate Twitter Plea After Silverware Goes Missing During Match

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Seems that Bradford City have got themselves a little quandary regarding some missing silverware, and as such have put the word out with one of the most bizarre footballing Twitter requests we've seen in a long time.

Yep. We're not talking about a pilfered West Riding County FA Challenge Cup trophy here, rather something altogether more ridiculous.

On This Day In 1996: Scotland Play Against Team Of Estonian Ghosts, Game Lasts For Three Seconds (Video)

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In one of the most bizarre incidents in international football history, Scotland kicked off their World Cup qualifier on 9th October, 1996, against Estonia in Tallinn only for the referee to abandon the match mere seconds later due to the minor issue of there only being one team on the pitch.

The game was due to be played in the evening, but Scotland manager Craig Brown had complained about the temporary floodlights not being up to scratch.

Borussia Dortmund Wish Jurgen Klopp Luck On His Liverpool Adventure With Brilliant Beatles Tweet (Photo)

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Photo: Liverpool FC/Getty Images

Jurgen Klopp is the new Liverpool manager, and he has himself a new £140,000-a-week contract to prove it.

Kloppo was coaxed into taking the Anfield gig after a five-month sabbatical, having left previous club Borussia Dortmund in May followingseven largely successful years at the Westfalenstadion.

Former Finnish Manager Of The Year Sacked By Club After Ditching Game To Sneak Off And Do Live TV Punditry

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"Just dipping out for a few hours lads"

Former Sunderland midfielder Keith Armstrong has been relieved of his managerial duties by Finnish side FC Ilves after he spent Sunday afternoon waffling about football in a television studio instead of on the touchlines.

Armstrong, who has previously been crowned Finnish Manager of the Year on no less than three separate occasions, ducked out of Ilves' important league match against SJK onSunday to appear as a pundit on MTV3's coverage of the Premier League clashes between Everton and Liverpool, and Arsenal versus Manchester United.

Euro 2016 – The Best Bits: Scotland 2-2 Poland (Photos & Highlights)

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On a night that saw Northern Ireland book their place at EURO 2016 and the Republic stun Germany with a win which sees them at least bag a play-off place, Scotland saw their dreams of a place in next summer's finals in France finally disintegrate.

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The Scots' hopes of securing a play-off place in Group D were already hanging by a very slender thread ahead of Thursday's clash with Poland, and a goal from in-form Bayern Munich striker Robert Lewandowski after just three minutesstunned the Hampden crowd.

Official: Jurgen Klopp Appointed Liverpool Manager In Three-Year £15million Deal

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Four days after Brendan Rodgers was given the elbow by Liverpool, the club have officially announced that Jurgen Klopp will succeed the Irishman at Anfield.

Klopp is likely to bring with himZeljko Buvac and Peter Krawietz, his assistants from his Dortmund days while his £5million per year salary could rise to £7million based on bonuses.

Euro 2016 – The Best Bits: Rep. Of Ireland 1-0 Germany (Photos & Highlights)

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The Republic of Ireland secured an incredible 1-0 win against World Champions Germany in Dublin on Thursday night, a result which secures the Boys in Green a play-off place at the very least.

The Germans, unsurprisingly, dominated for large periods of the game, with Jerome Boatengamongst others guilty of missing decent chances.

Euro 2016 – The Best Bits: Northern Ireland 3-1 Greece (Photos & Highlights)

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Northern Ireland will take part in a major finals event for the first time since the 1986 World Cup after Michael O'Neill's side beat Greece 3-1 at Windsor Park on Thursday night.

The hosts took the lead on 35 minutes, with Southampton midfielder Steven Davis netting from a Stuart Dallascentre.

Sky Germany: Jurgen Klopp Agrees Three-Year Deal To Become Liverpool’s New Manager

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It's only a matter of time before the official announcement is made anyway, but Sky Germany are reporting that Jurgen Klopp has today agreed a deal to become Liverpool's new manager.

The Telegraph have picked up the story and embellished it, adding that Klopp will be unveiled by Liverpool at a press conference arranged for Friday morning.

FIFA Website Reports Massive News Of Blatter And Platini Suspensions In Most FIFA Way Imaginable

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The breaking news today that FIFA have suspended the three most powerful men in world football has, as you'd expect, proved to be headline news right across the world.

Everywhere except Zurich, it would appear.

Indeed,official the FIFA website has reported the story in the most FIFA-esque, "we see no ships" manner imaginable.

Non-League Heroes: Braintree Town Players Stay Behind After Full-Time To Shake Hands With All 30 Away Fans

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Photo: Craig Shipley (@disco_shippers)

While Chelsea are busying charging fans £95 to watch their upcoming game against West Ham (though, to be fair, it's only £75 for a restricted view seat), cracking little non-league clubs like Braintree Town are busy keeping the spirit of football alive down at the otherend of the spectrum.

Official: FIFA Ethics Committee Suspend Both Sepp Blatter And Michel Platini Over Corruption Allegations

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"You're all a load of gobshites and you can all feck off"

This is a biggy.

In the past few minutes, FIFA have announced that both Sepp Blatter and his UEFA counterpart, Michel Platini, have been provisionally suspended for 90 days at the behest ofFIFA's ethics committee as various investigations into corruption allegations against the paircontinue to rumble on.

Regrets: Robin Van Persie Looks Miserable As Sin During Fenerbahce Warm-Up Drill (Video)

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Robin van Persie is pretty far from loving life at the moment, having made just four appearances for Fenerbahce since his €6.5million summer arrival from Manchester United.

The following video of Van Persie moping his way through a warm-up drill with a face like a slapped arse is doing the rounds this morning and it's almost as depressing as it is fundamentally amusing.

On This Day In 1995: Juninho Turns Up On Teesside As Middlesbrough Go Brazilian

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Photo: Action Images

If ever evidence were needed that English football was changing, it came on 8th October, 1995, when 22-year-old baby-faced Brazilian starlet Juninho swapped the hustle and bustleof the world's thirteenth largest city, Sao Paulo, for the somewhat contrasting, altogether more industrial pleasures of Middlesbrough.

‘It’s Like Dream Sex With Your Dream Woman, 34 Times In A Row!’ – Mario Basler Is Really Into Watching Bayern Munich At The Moment

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Having stuck five goals past both Wolfsburg andBorussia Dortmund within the space of their last three Bundesliga fixtures, it's fair to say that Bayern Munich are motoring at the moment.

Bayern are already eight points clear of second-placed (and previously unbeaten) Dortmund at the top of the tableby virtue ofwinning all eight of their opening games.

Ireland And Liverpool Legend Ronnie Whelan Gets In Muddle Over Sponsored Bulmers Tweet

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A top-classmidfielder in his time, ex-Republic of Ireland and Liverpool legend Ronnie Whelan is not quite at home with social media as he was with a ball at his feet.

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Currently doing some promo work with Bulmers Cider along with his regular punditry for RTE, the 54-year-old Dubliner made a bit of a hash of a sponsored Tweet, forgetting to delete the instructions from Bulmers marketing goons before firing out the Tweet in question.

Robbie Keane Hits Back At Roy Keane’s Breastfeeding Jibe With Cheeky Zinger (Video)

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A day after Assistant Manager Roy Keane's quip about new-dad Robbie Keane's availability for the Republic of Ireland's vital Euro 2016 qualifiers against Germany and Poland, the LA Galaxy hitman hit back with a rather cheeky response.

Roy Keane had responded to a journalist's query as to whether or not Robbie Keane would be involved in the weekend's games after the birth of his second child on Monday night, barking back:

Why wouldn't he be available?

Ambitious: League One Side Southend United Plan To Build Themselves A New 21,000-Seater Stadium

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Roots Hall, Southend's current home (Photo by Pete Norton/Getty Images)

Newly-promoted League One side Southend United have announced plans to build themselves a huge new 21,000-seater stadium.

The Shrimpers,who currently play their home games at their famous old 13,000-capacity Roots Hall ground,are putting the plans for their proposed new Fossetts Farm Stadium on public display next week.

Cracking Spoof Shows Cristiano Ronaldo & Lionel Messi As The Bestest Of Friends (Video)

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Imagine a world where Cristiano Ronaldo and Lionel Messi are bestest BFF pinky-promise friends forever and ever and ever.

Now unimagine it, because the fine chaps over at FutbOléhave already done all the hard work for you...


Proof, If Proof Were Needed, That Jurgen Klopp Is An Absolute Bloody Hero! (Video)

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Presenting, the only video of Jurgen Klopp in action you will ever need...

To think, this man could be a Premier League manager by the end of the week.

Gael Givet Reveals He Was Forced Out Of Ligue 1 Side Evian Because He Wouldn’t Shave His ‘Jihadist’ Beard

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As you may or may not be aware, ex-Blackburn defender Gael Givet is currently plugging away in Ligue 2 with AC Arles-Avignon, having left Ewood Park to signfor his hometown side in the summer of 2013.

After a year with Arles, Givetsecured himself a move back to the (relatively) big time in September 2014 when Ligue 1 outfitEvianThonon Gaillard tied up a deal for the 33-year-old defender.

On This Day In 2000: Kevin Keegan Quits After Germany Beat England In Final Game At Old Wembley

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On a day in which symbolism was always going to be writ large, the famous old twin-towered Wembley Stadium signed off from active duty with an England defeat against Germany in a World Cup qualifier.

The rain lashed down on a grotty old afternoon as David Seaman's lapse positioning gifted an early goal to Dietmar Hamannandcoach Kevin Keegan's tactical limitations – already under scrutiny following a miserable showing by England at the 2000 European Championships – were once more exposed.

Reports: First Ever ‘Legends World Cup’ To Take Place In Mexico In 2017

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According to whispers on the wind, talks are under way to create a 'Legends World Cup'that will consist of 12 national sides made up of big-name veterans.

It's early days, but it's being mooted that the first tournament will take place in Mexico in 2017.

This from ESPN FC...

The likely event venues would be Mexico City, Guadalajara and Monterrey and [the tournament] is expected to have 12 teams six European:Holland, Germany, Italy, Spain, France and England; four Americans: Mexico, United States, Brazil and Argentina; an African XI; and one Asian: Japan.

Injury Forces Ecuador Coach Gustavo Quinteros To Take Training Session From Mobility Scooter (Photos)

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Thanks to a ruptured achilles, Ecuador coachGustavo Quinteros was forced to prepare his side for their opening 2018 World Cup qualifier against Argentina on Friday from the comfort of a mobility scooter.

Quinteros twanged his tendon while playing football with friends a few weeks ago, and as such was forced to trundle around the training pitch in Quito looking like something from 'Last of the Summer Wine'.

Zlatan Ibrahimovic Confirms He’s In Talks To Make ‘Zlatan: The Movie’ Happen

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Not content with his own line of gentleman's musk, Zlatan Ibrahimovic has confirmed that he's in talks to make "Zlatan The Movie" a cinematic reality.

According to Sportbladet, Ibrahimovic already has a contract with Universal studios and is now in the early stages of creating an autobiographical film based on his "I Am Zlatan" memoir.

Bayern Munich Confirm World Cup-Winning Legend Gerd Müller Is Suffering From Alzheimer

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One of the greatest strikers of all-time, 'Der Bomber' Gerd Müller is suffering fromAlzheimer's. Bayern Munich, the club where he became a goal-scoring legend, announced the sad news on Tuesday, just a month shy of the great man's70th birthday.

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Bayern chairman,Karl-Heinz Rummenigge, another great German striker, said:

Gerd Müller is one of the all-time greats of world football.

Big Wes: American Bloke Becomes Die-Hard Nottingham Forest Fan After Being Mistaken For Wes Morgan On Twitter

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Big Wes gets his first look at the City Ground (Photo: Wesley Hall/Twitter)

The aghastAmerican bloke you see before you is a chap by the name of 'Big Wes', who realised his dream of taking in a Nottingham Forest game at the City Ground over the weekendafter falling in love with the team quite by accident.

Roy Keane: ‘Unless Robbie Keane Is Breastfeeding His New Baby, He’ll Be Playing Against Germany’

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Photo: Daily Mirror

Assistant manager Roy Keane was in trademark terse form during his pitch-side Republic of Ireland press conference earlier, answering questions over Robbie Keane's availability for the upcoming Euro 2016 qualifiers against Germany and Poland.

Keane and his wife Claudine have just welcomed their second child into the world on Monday night, so naturally the media assumed that paternity leave might rule the LA Galaxy striker out of the double-header.

Football Art: Emilio Sansolini Produces Beautiful Images Of National Team Kits As Designed By Famous Fashion Brands (Photos)

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As featured before on Pies, Gibraltar-based graphic designer Emilio Sansolini is a man who gets his kicks from redesigning football kits using achingly cool vintage aesthetics.

Emilio has done it again with hislatest batch of classically-styled concept kits, this time imagining what certain national team shirts would look like were they designed by leading fashion brands from each respective country.

Jurgen Klopp Insists It’s ‘Not A Definite Yes Or No’ When Pressed About Liverpool

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While Liverpool are understandably keen to get him signed up and in situ by the end of the week, Jurgen Klopp has revealed that he isn't any closer to taking the Anfield gig as talks between the two parties continue to rumble on.

Klopp was stopped by Bild reporter Phillip Arens as he made his way out of the annual DBVC (the German equivalent of the League Managers Association)meeting at Bayer Leverkusen's stadium and asked, rather bluntly, "What about Liverpool?

Random Great Goals: Jurgen Klopp Pops Up And Tucks Away A Pearler For Mainz, 1997 (Video)

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With the Fantastic Mr Klopp looking odds on to be sworn is as Liverpool's new manager before the end of the international break, Piesthought we'd dedicate a random great goal in his honour what with his perfectly solid playing career usually being glossed over and all.

Before embarking uponseven largely successful years as Mainz head coach, Klopp made over 260 appearances for the club between 1992 and 2001as a striker-cum-defender, scoring 34 goals along the way.

Satirical Trailer Released For ‘FIFA 2022: Qatar World Cup Edition’ – Game Includes Heat Stroke, Corruption And Migrant Worker Abuse (Video)

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Norwegian satirical channel NRKHumour have produced a spoof trailer for the 'FIFA 2022: Qatar World Cup Edition' video game which, in the interest of being as realistic as possible, is set to feature many of the intrinsicelements we've already come to associate with the scandalous tournament.

Along with players dying of dehydration and heat stroke, the game also features many and various forms of oppression and corruption as well assome very on-trend slave labour-related side missions.

On This Day In 1956: 18-Year-Old Wonderkid Bobby Charlton Scores Twice On His Manchester United Debut

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RoundOld Trafford way, they've known a thing or two about winning with kids for some time.

On 6th October, 1956, Sir Matt Busby gave prodigious youth team midfielder RobertCharlton his senior debut, just five days short of his 19th birthday.

The visitors were, coincidentally, Charlton Athletic, and 41,439 spectators turned up to see the game.

‘I Wouldn’t Play For France Again Even If My Dad Was Coach’ – Samir Nasri Refuses To Make Nice After 2014 World Cup Snub

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Image via 101gg

Looking like he stumbled through Justin Bieber's car bootsale on the way to the studio, Samir Nasri appeared on French television last night to further incineratehis bridges with the French national team.

Nasri hasn't played for France since he was left out of Didier Deschamps' provisional 30-man World Cup squad in 2014, with Deschamps intimating that the midfielder had been snubbed due to attitude-related issues.

Charlton Launch World’s First 360-Degree Football Highlights With Jordan Cousins’ Goal (Video)

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Photo: Getty

Apologies for being slightly slow on the uptake here, but Charlton have launched what they believe to be the first ever set of 360-degree football highlights having captured Jordan Cousins' dramatic injury-time equaliser against Fulham 'in the round', so to speak.

The 360-degree camera was positioned in the Covered End at the Valley and was used to film Cousins' 91st-minute header on Sunday afternoon.

Chelsea Stand By Their Man As Jose Mourinho Receives THE DREADED VOTE OF CONFIDENCE™

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We can see you sneaking out...

Chelsea's top brass have taken the slightly unusual step of issuing a short statement on the club's official website this afternoon to announce that Jose Mourinho still retains their full support despite his side's lumpy start to the season.

The Blues lost 3-1 against Southampton on Saturday to leave them languishing way down in 16th place, four points above the relegation zone and already a full 10 points behind leaders Man City.

Barcelona’s La Masia Goal Of The Week Will Instantly Make You Jealous Of An 11-Year-Old (Video)

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Every week, Barcelona feature a goal scored within their La Masia youth ranks on the club's official Youtube channel, just to give us all an ominous glimpse of the incredible talent they are cultivating within their famed in-house hatchery.

This week's effort is worthy of a special mention, chiefly due to the incredibly skilful approach play, as scored byBarca's Alevi A team (i.

Diego Maradona Joins Argentina For Little Victory Dance After Rugby World Cup Win Over Tonga (Video)

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Not a sentence that crops up overly regularly but Diego Maradona was in Leicester on Sunday to watchArgentina take on Tonga in the Rugby World Cup at the King Power Stadium.

As it happens, the Pumas clawed their way to a comprehensive 45-16 victory to shore up second place behind tournament favourites New Zealand in the Pool Ctable and do their prospectsof qualifying for the quarter-finals no harm at all.

On This Day In 2008: Geovanni Strikes Gold As Hull City Complete North London Double Over Tottenham And Arsenal

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These were heady days for Hull City when, rather than market-driven name changes and megalomaniac owners, the actual football on display was the focus of conversation up in East Yorkshire.

Having shaken offa 0-5 opening day thumping courtesy of Wigan, the newly-promoted and bang in-form Hull side were beginning to makethe rest of the Premier League sit up and take notice.

Bayern Munich Politely Demand That Manchester United Stop Emailing About Thomas Muller

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Bayern Munich have reportedly had to make a point of asking Manchester United to stop bombarding them with email inquiries as tothe availability of Thomas Muller.

United went in hard for Muller over the summer, with various press reports of a £71million bid being knocked back as the transfer window drew to a close.

Colorado Rockies Baseball Player Forced To Confirm He’s Not ‘That’ Brendan Rodgers After Being Inundated With Twitter Messages

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Photo: Colorado Rapids

As you've no doubt heard, Liverpool parted ways with manager Brendan Rodgers yesterday evening in the hours following the 1-1 derby draw against Everton.

On the other side of the planet and completely oblivious to the managerial wrangling on Merseyside, a professional baseball player was happily going about his business,right up until the point that he started being inundated with mostly sympathetic Twitter messages about him losing his job.

BBC Football Analyst Garth Crooks Baffles Everybody By Posting Yet Another Insane ‘Team Of The Week’

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Every Monday morning, BBC Sport's resident football analyst pundit Garth Crooks presents his ‘team of the week' unto the world the 11 Premier League players to have caught his discerning, astute eye over the course of the weekend's top flight action.

Crooks'team usually just includes anybody who managed to score, forcibly shoe-horned into a formation of his choosing.

Snapshot: Chelsea Ladies Win WSL Title For First Time After 4-0 Win Against Sunderland…

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While the Chelsea men's team might be experiencing a dismal run of form, the clubs's ladies' side have enjoyted a superb 2015 Women's Super League campaign, culminating in the west Londoners lifting the title on Sunday after hammering Sunderland Ladies 4-0.

Ahead of the final WSL matchday, the Blues were two points ahead of title-chasers Manchester City, with a win against the Lady Black Cats guaranteeing the west Londoners their first WSL title.

Thierry Henry Delivers Superbly Comedic Reaction To News That Liverpool Sacked Brendan Rodgers (Vine)

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A magnificent player butaniffy pundit, Thierry Henry does still possess the capacity to entertain, as shown by the Arsenal legend's wonderfully camp reaction to hearing that Brendan Rodgers had been given the sack by Liverpool.

It surely hints at a future in comedy for the former French goal-machine while Jamie Carragher's raised eyebrow's pretty impressive too.

The Best Bits: Swansea 2-2 Tottenham (Photos & Highlights)

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Two superb free-kicks from Christian Eriksen secured a share of the points for Tottenham at the Liberty Stadium on Sunday.

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Andre Ayew put Swansea 1-0 up after just 16 minutes after good work from the impressive Jefferson Montero.

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However, the lead for the hosts lasted for just 11 minutes before Danish schemer Eriksen fired home a superb free-kick which left Lukasz Fabianski with no chance in the Swans' goal.

The Best Bits: Arsenal 3-0 Man Utd (Photos & Highlights)

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Arsenal produced a superb first-half attacking performance to blitz Manchester United in a comfortable and deserved 3-0 win at the Emirates.

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With Petr Cech back between the sticks, the Gunners started brightly and went 1-0 up after just six minutes, with Alexis Sanchez producing a fine flicked effort from a Mesut Ozil pass.

Official: Liverpool Sack Brendan Rodgers Just Hours After Merseyside Derby Draw

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Well, we really didn't see this one coming.

No sooner had his Liverpool side drawn 1-1 against Everton in this afternoon's Merseyside derby than Brendan Rodgers found himself out of a job.

According to the BBC, the decision to can Rodgers was made by the Liverpool higher-ups at 18:30 BST, just hours after full-time.

The Best Bits: Everton 1-1 Liverpool (Photos & Highlights)

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The 225th Merseyside derby ended with both sides taking a point apiece after a Danny Ings goal was cancelled out by Romelu Lukaku.

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Former Chelsea hitman Lukaku was superb throughout, proving to be a thorn in the side of the Liverpool defence all afternoon.

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Hapoel Beer Sheva Midfielder John Ogu Proposes To Girlfriend Immediately After The Final Whistle (Video)

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Photo: Pulse Nigeria

Safe to say that Hapoel Beer Sheva midfielder John Ogu had himself a fairly good ol' Saturday yesterday.

Not only did his side stick five goals pastMaccabi Petach Tikva in the Israeli Premier League, but the Nigerian international also got himself engaged in the immediate aftermath of the game.

Spoilsports Direct: Newcastle To Issue Players With Club Suits To Put An End To Pre-Match Tuxedo Nonsense

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Newcastle United are to issue all of their first-team players with club-appointed suits to wear before matches in an effort to stamp out the current fad of turning up to games intuxedos.

Summer signing Chancel Mbemba started the trend by turning up in a tuxfor Newcastle'sPremier League opener against Southampton at St.

“If They Sack Me They Sack The Best Manager This Club Has Ever Had” – Chelsea Boss Jose Mourinho Goes On Long-Winded Rant After Southampton Defeat (Video)

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With eight points from eight games and currently 16th place in the table, this was not the start to the season anyone expected of champions Chelsea. Along withthe poor performances on the pitch, the controversialdeparture of club doctor Eva Carneiro has added to an air of discord at Stamford Bridge, with Jose Mourinho looking more vulnerable than ever before.

The Best Bits: Chelsea 1-3 Southampton (Photos & Highlights)

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Chelsea's nightmare start to the season showed no signs of ending at Stamford Bridge on Saturday, with the Blues going down 3-1 to Southampton.

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The Blues, with Falcao starting in attack in place of the suspended Diego Costa, did open the scoring on 11 minutes courtesy of yet another free-kick from the in-form Willian.

The Best Bits: Man City 6-1 Newcastle (Photos & Highlights)

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A 20-minutes five-goal masterclass from Sergio Aguero sent Manchester City back to the top of the table and left Newcastle rock-bottom.

The Magpies had taken the lead on 18 minutes, courtesy of an Aleksander Mitrovic header on 18 minutes.

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Steve McClaren's men then had chances to extend their lead, with Mitrovic and Giorgio Wijnaldum seeing efforts saved by Joe Hart.

Dick Advocaat ‘Set To Leave Sunderland After Today’s Game’ As Sporting Director Leads Back-Room Exodus

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Sunderland have been plunged further into chaos this morning amid myriad press reportsthat manager Dick Advocaat is set to leave his post no matter the result of today's game against West Ham.

The club are currently slap, bang, bottom of the Premier League and are still to register a win so far this season.

Frank Lampard Takes 48 Seconds To Score New York City FC’s Fastest Ever Goal (Video)

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Photo: Getty

Granted the club has only been in existence for five minutes so talk of all-time records is a little premature, but Frank Lampard took just 48 seconds to score the fastest goal in New York City FC's brief history against DC United last night.

Lampard took less than a minute to score his third goal in four games for NYCFC, cleaning up after David Villa's shot had come back off the DC 'keeper.

Manchester United String-Puller Juan Mata Tucks Away Blindfolded Freekicks For Fun (Video)

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As well as obviously possessing twice the testicular quota of most men, Juan Mata is also very, very good at this football lark.

In fact, just mucking around on his official Youtube channel, the Manchester United string-puller decided to have a go at some blindfolded free-kick trick shots.

Turns out Matacould indeedplay football in his sleep if he so chose.

On This Day In 1999: Rare Ray Of Light As Sheffield Wednesday Hit Five To Wallop Wimbledon

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Sheffield Wednesday striker Gilles De Bilde is challenged by Alan Kimble of Wimbledon (Photo: Ben Radford /Allsport)

It hadn't been a good start to the 1999/2000 Premier League season for Sheffield Wednesday. Over the course of the first nine games of the campaign, the team had failed tochalk up a single win.

‘Football Should Not Be A Privilege’ – West Ham Boss Slaven Bilic Weighs In On ‘Twenty’s Plenty’ Ticket Price Campaign

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With mass terrace protests scheduled to take place up and down the football pyramidthis weekend, the 'Twenty's Plenty' ticket price campaign is certainly beginning to gather real traction.

As football fans of ordinary means continue to be milked dry and priced out of the sport they so dearly love, the FSF-driven campaign is calling forall away tickets in England and Wales to be capped at £20.

Europa League – The Best Bits: Liverpool 1-1 Sion (Photos & Highlights)

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A mix-and-match Liverpool side could only draw at home to Swiss side Sion at Anfield on Thursday night, leaving the Reds still waiting for their first win in these season's Europa League.

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Set up in a 3-5-2 formation, the Merseysiders got off to the perfect start with Adam Lallana netting on four minutes following a cross from Divock Origi.

Europa League – The Best Bits: Monaco 1-1 Tottenham (Photos & Highlights)

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A late goal fromStephan El Shaarawy robbed Spurs of all three points away at an almost empty Stade Louis II stadium on Thursday night.

The Lilywhites started well, with Nacer Chadli firing over.

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However, the opening goal eventually came on 35 minutes, courtesy of the in-form Erik Lamela after a fine passing move.

Werder Bremen Winger Melvyn Lorenzen Suspended For Eating A Baguette

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Photo: Kicker.de

Werder Bremen have suspended 20-year-old winger Melvyn Lorenzen for the heinous, depraved crime of eating a baguette too soon before a game.

Yep, you read that correctly. A baguette.

According to the Independent of Malta, the incident occured last Saturday while the Bremen II team buswas preparing to hit the road for an Under-23 fixture against Thuringen.

Luongo, Vargas, Atsu, Okazaki – The Ballon D’Or Preliminary Shortlist Includes Some Very Surprising Names

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Not that there's a cat in hell's chance they'll be on the stage in Zurich come January, but it would appear that the likes of Harry Kane, Shinji Okazaki, Philippe Coutinho and Wilfried Bony have all found their way, slightly surprisingly in some cases, onto this year's 59-man Ballon d'Or initial shortlist.

FK Drina Zvornik Coach Discovers He’s Been Fired Via Facebook, Likes Comment Reading ‘About Time’

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Photo: Sport Centar

Bosnian top flight side FK Drina Zvornik are currently looking for a new manager after sacking previous incumbent Vladica Petrovic yesterday not that he had the foggiest idea he was out of a job until stumbling across the news on Facebook.

According to Sport Centar, Drina Zvornik announced that Petrovic had been relieved of his duties via their official Facebook page before telling the man himself.

FAIL: Al-Ahli Defender Concedes Daft Penalty After Disastrous Handball Cock-Up (Video)

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A little bit of clanger-dropping action from Tuesday night's Asian Champions League clash between Al-Hilal and Al-Ahli now, mainly concerning apenalty whichthe latter team managed to concede in spectacularly ludicrouscircumstances.

The nonsense began when Al-Alhi defender Salmin Khamis jumped the gun in his attempts to shepherd a looseball out over the touchline.

Retro Football: Celtic’s Johnny Doyle Shown Softest Red Card In History Of Scottish Football, 1977 (Video)

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Johnny Doyle of Celtic tussles with Rangers legend Sandy Jardine, 1977

Soft red cards are ten-a-penny in the modern game, butback inthe 1970's it usually took a special kind of swivel-eyed hatchet job to wind up inan early bath.

However,that didn't stop Celtic winger Johnny Doyle finding himself on the wrong end of what must surely rank as one of the flimsiest dismissals in British football history, even by current namby-pamby standards.

England Squad For Final Pair Of Euro 2016 Qualifiers Announced: Delle Ali And Danny Ings In, Daniel Sturridge Out

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Roy Hodgson has announced his England squad for the two remainingEuro 2016 qualifiers against Estonia and Lithuania.

The headline news not that it's particularly surprising is that Daniel Sturridge has been left out of the reckoning having only just returned from a troublesome long-term hip injury.

Amateur Footballer Jailed For Breaking Opponent’s Leg With ‘Long Jump-Style’ Horror Tackle

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Photo: Manchester Evening News

An amateur footballer has been sentenced to a year-long prison sentence for intentionally breaking an opponent's leg with what was described as a "long jump-style" lunge.

Nathaniel Kerr, 27, shattered the leg of Stuart Parsons, 30, with a two-footed tackle during aStockport pub league matchin August 2014 before subjecting his victim to a tirade of abuse as he lay mangled on the floor.

On This Day In 1996: ‘Arsene Who?’ Turns Up To Take Over At Arsenal

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A long-standing institution appointing a leader to widespread derision from press and pundits, accompanied by apocalyptic predictions of doom? It could never happen today.

But on the first day ofOctober, 1996, a certain Arsene Wenger officially took charge as manager of Arsenal Football Club and it didn't go down well.

Oil Check: Tanzania Ban Defender Juma Said For Two Years For Committing ‘Act Of Indecency’

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Photo: BBC Sport

The Tanzania Football Federation (TFF) have slapped international defender Juma Said with a massive two-year ban for engaging in what they call an "act of indecency" on the pitch.

The incident occurred during Mbeya City's recent league tie against Azam on 27th September, in which Mbeya captain Said poked a finger up the nether-crease of his opponent, John Bocco.

Annual FIFA vs UEFA Staff Match Cancelled After Criminal Proceedings Opened Against Sepp Blatter

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It's with a heavy heart that we're forced to announce this year's FIFA vs UEFA staff match has been cancelled due to lack of interestalleged widespread executive-level corruption.

According to the Beeb, the annual staff match has been nixed after the Swiss Attorney General opened criminal proceedings against FIFA president Sepp Blatter on Monday.

David Beckham Backs Former Side AC Milan To Win The Champions League, Though There’s One Small Issue…

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Having plugged away tirelessly over the past decade or so to overturn the 'Essex bimbo' persona that blighted his early professional career, David Beckham let a classic gaffe slip while opening the new Adidas store in Dubai yesterday.

Asked who he thought would win the Champions League this year, Becks took a moment to think before diplomatically proffering forth three of his former employers.

West Brom Striker Victor Anichebe Miffed After Being Snubbed By ‘Game Of Thrones’ Stars In Hotel Lobby

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"Yer knerr nothing (about the West Brom squad) Jon Snerrrr"

West Brom striker Victor Anichebe took to Twitter on Wednesday evening to voice his frustration after being snubbed in his hotel by a couple of Game of Thrones stars.

Being a big fan of the show, Anichebe was excited to spot Kit Harrington (who plays Jon Snow) and Rose Leslie (who plays Ygritte) in the lobby of his hotel and so did what any self-respecting super fan would do: asked the pair for a quick photo.

Galactico! Cristiano Ronaldo Hits 500 Career Goals For Club & Country (Video)

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That fellaCristiano Ronaldo's not a bad footballer, is he? On Wednesday night against Malmo in the Champions League, the Real Madrid megastar netted his 500th and 501st career goals for club and country, an incredible figure considering the high level the forward has been playing at all his career.

Champions League – The Best Bits: Borussia Monchengladbach 1-2 Man City (Photos & Highlights)

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A late penalty from Sergio Aguero secured a precious and hard-fought win for Manchester City in Germany on Wednesday night.

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Coming on the back of consecutive Premier League defeats, City were eager for a good result against BMG, with a reinstated Joe Hart between the posts.